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  • Let's say you just had a big row with someone close to you.

    假設你剛和與你親近的人大吵了一架

  • They behaved terribly, maybe broke something and said something hideous to you.

    他的行為很惡劣,例如砸壞東西跟對你說了非常傷人的話

  • It's so tempting to give up on them and just hate them, but there's another way.

    你大可直接放棄並開始討厭這個人,但事實上有另一種做法

  • Here's a big idea

    事情大概是這樣的

  • People are almost never simply bad.

    人們基本上不會只有糟糕的一面

  • What they are far more often is scared.

    而是他們經常感到恐懼

  • When they behave in really horrible ways, it tends to be because they're extremely anxious for some reason or another.

    當人們做出非常糟糕的行為時,通常是因為在某種層面上,他們感到極度的不安

  • Though their behavior can seem strong, no one who actually felt strong would be all arsey like that.

    雖然他們的行為可能看似強勢,但真正的強者並不會表現得像混帳一樣

  • The mature response shouldn't therefore be to increase tension and flare up in return

    所以,對這些行為成熟的反應,不應該是加深雙方之間的緊張並加以反擊

  • but to strive to see all you've got in front of you is someone who can't cope.

    而是想辦法看清眼前這個人是如何的無法面對自己的情緒

  • We are so aligned to the idea that it's patronizing to think of people as younger than they are

    我們深信,把他人的心智年齡視為比實際年齡還小是一種踐踏

  • we forget that it's also, at times, the greatest privilege to look beyond someone's adult self

    但我們也時常忘記,能夠看透他人作為成人的一面

  • in order to engage with and forgive the anxious or disappointed, furious or inarticulate child within.

    藉此和他心裡那焦慮、失望、憤恨不平、措辭不當的孩子互動,並且原諒他,是多麼幸運的事

  • There's another thing to bear in mind when all you can see is a person's weak points.

    當你只看得見別人的缺點時,你也必須記得另一件事:

  • Weak points are always linked to strong points and vice versa.

    人們的優缺點永遠是一體兩面的

  • So, for example, the strength of thoroughness is always going to bring with, in other contexts, the weakness of pedantry.

    因此,舉例來說,細心的人可能也會對雞毛蒜皮的小事錙銖必較

  • Creative brilliance might well be inseparable from logistical unreliability.

    豐富的創造力可能也隱含在實務上的不可靠

  • People who are fantastic leaders at work are likely to be seriously difficult around domestic chores.

    在職場上傑出的領導者在做家事時也可能讓人覺得不可理喻

  • The reason for keeping this in mind is that we often encounter people's weaknesses

    我們必須謹記這點,因為他人的缺點

  • at moments when we're in danger of losing sight of their strengths.

    經常在我們忽略他們的優點時被放大

  • At certain points, all it seems we're bumping into are the weaknesses.

    甚至,有的時候,似乎只能看見他們的缺點

  • We wonder: "how did I end up in this relationship or hanging out with this person?"

    例如,我們會納悶自己為什麼會和這個人交往或和那個人成為好友

  • During tough times, we only see the flaws.

    當一段關係面臨挑戰時,我們也只看得到缺陷

  • We are failing to step back enough and ask a really vital question

    我們無法後退一步,並加以思考

  • not just what are these people's weaknesses

    除了缺點之外

  • but what are the strengths of which these annoying traits are the unfortunate shadow sides.

    他們這些煩人的特質有哪些優點,讓他們不幸的也擁有這些缺點

  • Everyone is going to have the weaknesses of their strengths.

    每個人都擁有自己的優點所伴隨的缺點

  • Forgiving people must mean doing everything we can to keep their strengths in view

    原諒他人代表在我們只能看見他人的缺點的時候

  • at moments where their weaknesses are only too painfully apparent.

    盡力地讓他們的優點處於焦點位置

  • if you like our films, take a look at our shop

    如果你喜歡我們的影片,也請光顧我們的網路商店

  • theschooloflife.com/shop

    theschooloflife.com/shop

  • You'll find lots of thoughtful books, games, stationery and more

    在那裡你會找到許多耐人尋味的書籍、遊戲、文具等等

Let's say you just had a big row with someone close to you.

假設你剛和與你親近的人大吵了一架

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B1 中級 中文 缺點 優點 行為 年齡 糟糕 混帳

如何原諒 (How to Forgive)

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    VoiceTube 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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