BRIGETTE LUNDY-PAINE

BRIGETTE LUNDY-PAINE

SAMANTHA MARIE WARE

SAMANTHA MARIE WARE

MARGOT VS LILY

健身狂VS 大宅女

EPISODE 1: Resolutions.

第一回合: 新年目標

I want to start doing all of my videos in 3D.

我想要把所有的影片都做成3D的

You don't need a 3D YouTube channel.

你不需要3D影片

Hey! You're LilyNinja, right?

嘿！妳是忍者Lily嗎？

Yeah!

是的！

Tough love, ninja style!

愛的忍術！

I love your fitness channel.

我超喜歡妳的健身影片

Thank you!

謝謝！

Happy holidays!

假期愉快！

Yeah....

好喔

I'll see...ya! Later.

再見啦！

Okay!

好的！

Okay, bye!

掰掰！

Everything will be posted by the end of the day.

影片會在每晚12點前上傳

Okay!

好的！

Pleasestay on top of promotion.

請隨時注意一下

Yeah!

好啊！

Happy holidays.

假期愉快

Um...I'll see you later.

回頭見

Happy holidays, employee number one.

假期愉快 我的第一名員工

Just Glenn is fine.

叫我Glenn就好

Margot!

Margot！

Sister!

姐！

Hi! Hi...

嗨！嗨...

Whoa, you guys are sisters?

哇， 妳們是姐妹？

Yeah, we're adopted.

我們都是被領養的

We're genetically identical, actually.

我們是同一對父母親生的

That's a fan, be nice.

她是粉絲，你別這樣

So, people running up to you

所以，大家就直接衝出來

and yelling stuff...

朝妳大吼大叫

Is that happening a lot more now?

最近都這樣嗎？

Yeah, no, it's amazing.

對啊，超酷的

I've doubled my subscribers since June,

我的粉絲數比六月增加了一倍

I'm up to 900,000,

現在已經達到900,000人了

but I'm even more excited about this

不過在我心中

full week of family time.

還是家人比較重要啦

Yeah, it's funny you should say that

但諷刺的昰

because the only reason that

我之所以有空回家

I'm able to spend all this time with family...

我之所以有空回家

Well can't you work from home? They're just tweets, right?

妳不是在家也可以工作嗎？不就是發發動態而已？

Well, no, I did a lot more than just tweet for them...

才不只是發動態呢

-Hashtag,everywhere, is Lily Ninja style. -That doesn't make any sense.

-到處都是#Lily忍者風格。-這說不通啊

I got fired.

我被炒魷魚了

What?

什麼？

Wait...

等一下

wait up.

等等

You have to

你必須

tell me what happened.

告訴我怎麼回事

Why?

為什麼？

Your work was so brilliant!

妳明明做得很好！

Really?

真的嗎？

Yeah!

是啊！

Was my work brilliant?

我真的做得很好嗎？

Well, okay, I got fired because I sent a mean Tweets about the CEO accidentally from the company account.

我不小心發了一則諷刺老闆的動態，還是用公司的帳號

Stalin without the charisma?

妳是說「披著羊皮的狼」那則嗎？

Yep, that's the one. I was confused by that.

就是那則動態

Sweetheart,

寶貝

do you ever think it might be that hair?

妳說是不是因為他的毛髮？

Okay, Joe, you're not helping.

Joe 別再說了

Honey, it is their loss.

失去妳是他們的損失

Your work reminds me of Tolstoy.

妳寫的東西很有托爾斯泰的味道

Mom,

媽

I tweeted for an accounting software company!

我只是幫一家財務軟體公司發動態而已

No, his short fiction.

我指的的是他的短篇小說

You know, it all just makes me so mad and sad.

這實在讓我太煩躁了

I gotta go for a run.

我要出門跑步

What do you say, do you wanna come?

要不要和老爸一起？

Hmm...

嗯？

hmm?

嗯？

Outrun the sad with dad?

跟老爸一起把煩惱拋諸腦後？

I'll outrun the sad with dad.

我要和老爸一起

Bye!

掰掰

Cab sauvignon,

要和老媽來點紅酒嗎

with maman?

要和老媽來點紅酒嗎

Yeah, why not?

好啊

Margot!

Margot！

Presents!

快來拆禮物！

Come on!

快點

It's Christmas!

今天是聖誕節！

Wow, exercise clothes. Yeah!

哇！是運動上衣！

Thank you, Lily.

謝謝妳Lily

I'm not sure I'm gonna use it

雖然應該用不到

but...

但

appreciate the gesture.

還是謝謝啦

But you have to.

怎麼會用不上

Margot,

Margot

I've...

我

I've been thinking about this whole getting fired thing

我好好的想過這件事

and I think that this is the perfect opportunity

我覺得妳被炒

for you to turn things around.

反而是鹹魚翻身的好機會

New Years Eve is a perfect

正好趁著新年

way to make resolutions.

訂下新目標

Turn...

鹹魚翻身

things around?

什麼意思？

Just...

試試看嘛

look, just try it on.

好不好

Please?

拜託？

There are little holes for your thumbs.

袖口的小洞還可以把大拇指伸進去呢

My brain...

我

is an ab!

是

Or a delt!

肌肉狂

And my life is super weird!

我的人生超詭異

And I have no friends!

而且我沒有朋友

Oh my god!

哇！

You look great!

超適合妳的！

Doesn't it make you just

是不是一穿上

want to work out like crazy?

就想要動起來

Hi-ya!

嘿呀！

Inhale...

吸氣

...exhale.

吐氣

Inhale...

吸氣

...exhale.

吐氣

I'll...

我

see...

們

ya!

等等

Later.

見！

We don't need instruments,

不用樂器

it's like completely

就用

our voices...

我們自己的聲音

Oh hey, Margot...

嘿，Magot

Margot.

Magot

You and your crew can hang here, too, you know.

妳跟妳的朋友可以在家玩啊

Maybe both of you girls could

不如妳們兩個

have friends over here for New Years.

新年請朋友來家裡玩吧

No...

不

Mom, I have plans at Kathy's.

媽，我已經說好要去Kathy家了

Okay, you tell Kathy that the big party is at this place now.

那就跟她說派對改到這了

Right Joe?

是嗎Joe

Yeah, yeah.

對啊

We love hosting parties.

我們最愛派對了

Oh, come on.

噢別這樣

Please? I've had this party planned for weeks.

拜託我早就計畫好了

Great, oh, and Lily,

太好了，噢， Lily

you can invite your friends, too.

妳也把朋友都叫來吧

No, yeah. I'll invite all my friends.

呃，好啊我會把他們都找來

Okay...fine.

好吧

But you guys are buying all the booze.

但酒你們負責喔

Yeah.

好啊

Okay.

好吧

...started here and went to South Carolina, right?

從這裡出發，然後去南卡羅來納嗎？

Yeah!

是啊！

And I used to have the biggest crush on him

虧我之前還超哈他

and it was crazy!

真是瘋了！

Because he first came out...

但其實他

like, in sixth grade...

六年級就出櫃了

Oh my god!

天啊！

New Years resolutions can be tough.

新年目標真煩人

Every year I can't quite decide what to focus on.

每次我都不知道要訂甚麼才好

What does the new year mean to you?

你們覺得呢？

Hi, I'm Lily.

嗨！我是Lily

Yeah, we remember you from school.

我們記得

You're Margot's sister.

妳是Margot的妹妹

Yeah.

對啊

Happy New Year, Lily.

新年快樂 Lily

Anyway, so are you still with James? Or...

所以妳還跟James在一起嗎

Yeah,

是啊

yeah,

是啊

but things are good,

我們相處的蠻好的

so...yeah...

所以...是啊

Inhale...

吸氣

...exhale...

吐氣

Five...

五

four...

四

three...

三

two...

二

one...

一

WHOOO!

(歡呼聲)

Margot!

Margot!

Margot, hey.

Margot，嘿

Happy New Year!

新年快樂

Sister toast!

妹妹來乾杯

Yeah

耶

Hey, I think I'm actually gonna go to bed.

我差不多要睡了

Okay.

好啊

Good night.

晚安

Happy New Year.

新年快樂

How much longer is this gonna go?

還要多久才會結束呢

I don't know, Lily.

我不知道

It's a party, so it's probably gonna go for a while.

但一般來說不會那麼早結束

It just happens one night of the year with your friends.

畢竟大家一年也就聚那麼一晚

Not for you.

對妳來說不是吧

You do this every night of the year.

妳每晚都這樣

It's a problem.

這會出問題的

Okay...

好

...and your problem...

但妳的問題是

...is that you literally have zero friends.

妳連一個朋友都沒有

What?

妳說什麼？

No, I have friends.

我有朋友

Face it, Lily.

面對現實吧Lily

Your job has made you into this weird,

妳的工作把妳變成一個怪異

fake pseudo-celebrity who's completely alone in the world.

且孤僻的網路紅人

And the worst part about it?

更可悲的是

It's not even a real job!

這甚至不是一份真的工作

Not a real job?

不能算工作？

I'm literally laughing hysterically at the fact that

笑死我了

that's coming from someone who just got fired

一個剛被炒魷魚的人還有臉說這些話

from their job,

有沒有搞錯

so do not talk to me about job realness.

現在的妳沒資格跟我說什麼是工作

I could do your job.

妳的工作我也能做

And so could all human beings and most animals.

別說人了，連大部分的動物都能做

I dare you to start your own fitness channel.

有本事妳也開個健身頻道

And I wanna see you get at least a thousand subscribers.

看妳能不能有一千個粉絲

Okay, well I would like to see you get more than zero friends.

好啊，那我們看看妳交不交到朋友

That's your New Years resolution, get three friends.

交到三個朋友就是妳的新年目標

And I don't mean fans.

不能是粉絲

And I don't mean guys that wanna sleep with you.

不能是哈妳的男生

I mean friends.

我指的是三個真正的朋友

That is a thousand to three.

一千個粉絲對上三個朋友

Whoever gets to their number first, wins.

看誰先達到誰就贏，賭不賭

That's idiotic.

太可笑了

You're on.

一言為定

Hey, how much longer is this gonna go?

還沒結束啊

THE SCORE MARGOT SUBSCRIBERS: 000 LILY FRIENDS: 0 PERCENT TO GOAL

MARGOT粉絲數: 000 LILY 好友數: 0

Next time on MARGOT VS LILY:

下集預告

I see why people like this.

怪不得大家都愛看

Oh, Allie, are you serious?

Allie 妳確定嗎

Maybe we can get a drink...

要不要去喝一杯

...Bye!

掰掰

...and everything will...

然後一切都會

Alright.

好吧

It's listed as intermediate,

這是中級訓練

so...

所以

it shouldn't be that hard.

應該不會太難

AHHHHHHH!

啊啊啊

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