- How's that with Lourdes gone?

- An absolutely devastating experience, I have to say.

- Everybody says that. - I know, everyone says that.

And my sister said it to me when her son went away,

and I said, "Oh, my God, you're being so dramatic."

She was, like, bawling on the phone.

And then my daughter left me, and I was--

I fell into the deepest depression.

And I'm always so happy when she calls me and says,

"Mommy, I miss you,"

or "Mommy, I need you to rub my head."

I'm like, "Yes," so...

- You're still needed.

- I'm still needed, yes.

- And now, do you--

have you met people that she's dating?

Does she introduce you to whoever she's dating?

- Yeah, he came to our house two weekends ago

and spent the weekend with us.

both: Mm-hmm.

- Are you--I mean, you can't really say

if you don't like him, but--

[laughter]

But, I mean, you must be very, very protective of her.

- I am. He's a very sensible boy.

Young man-- I shouldn't say he's a boy.

He's intelligent. So I'm happy about that.

- How old is he?

- He's a sophomore, so a year older than her.

- So 22, something like that?

- No. 19. She's 18.

- I don't know-- I never went to no college.

I don't know. [laughter]

- "Yo.

I didn't go to no college."

[laughter]

- So 19. - He's 19, she's 18, and--

- What's the youngest boy you have ever dated?

[laughter]

- I mean, it depends on, like, how old.

You got to, like-- it depends on--

- Like, in the last, like, five years.

[laughter]

- 'Cause I was gonna say, when I moved to New York,

I dated a 16-year-old, but that was--

- That was when you were, like, 18.

- Yeah. Anyway--

- So you've always been for younger men,

even when you were 18.

- No, that's not true.

I've dated all sorts, all kinds.

I dated Warren Beatty, I mean...

- That's true. - So...no.

The youngest was-- in the last six years--22, yeah.

[scattered cheers] - All right.

[cheers and applause]

All right. - Why is everyone so obsessed?

I don't-- - I'm not obsessed.

- Age is a number.

- I agree with you, and I-- we're the same age,

and I certainly don't feel my age.

I feel like--you know, until I have to tell someone my age,

or if I read it in print, 'cause they are obsessed with--

- Until you're walking with a Zimmer frame, yo,

you can do whatever you want.

- With a what? - Zimmer--

What do you call those things? When you--

- Oh, a metal detector?

[laughter]

Are you gonna go on the beach?

That's when you start aging, when you're on the beach with--

- No, you know, those frames that you walk with.

- Oh, yeah. A walker?

woman: Walker. - Yeah.

- Walker, yeah. [laughter]

- What's a Zimmer frame?

- I thought that--maybe-- I don't know,

maybe it's 'cause I haven't had enough sleep.

I thought it was the thing-- you know, you walk,

and you, like, hold on to it.

- It's a walker. - Yeah.

- Right. [laughter]

- Ah, yeah, people just don't like it

when I have fun, I think.

- Yeah, I think it's fantastic.

And men date younger women all the time

and nobody says anything about it.

What's wrong with women dating younger men?

[cheers and applause] - Thank you. Whoo!

- I want you to go to Michigan-- to the university

and be able to hang out with Lourdes,

but I know that you're you, so that's gonna be difficult.

So I got something so you can go.

And here it is.

So... - Oh, my God, another cape.

- Yeah, but look at the back of it though.

- Oh.

[laughter and applause]

Should I try it?

- Nobody will ever know it's-- - No.

By the way, she does-- I'm made--

when I go to visit her, I have to stay in her dorm.

I can't even go out on the streets with her.

- All right, so you can wear that.

- I will.

- And look what else I got so you can go to the game.

It's a cooler that you can bring, and--

[applause]

- Oh, excellent.

- So I can--

- It's very--it's so low-key. - Yeah.

You can drink your champagne. - Tailgate party.

- And then I also have-- Guillermo has some stuff.

- Guillermo, you thought of me. Oh.

Hi. - Hi, Madonna.

- Cheers. - Nice to meet you.

- How are you? - This is for you.

I'm very good. How are you? - Nice to meet you.

- Look, I have you on my arm.

- Oh, my God. Aw.