Tonight we've got a wonderful musical guest who's gonna to sing a special Christmas song for the kids.

今晚一位優秀的嘉賓會為小孩們獻唱一首特別的聖誕歌.

And we've invited several local children from a local shelter to join her on stage.

我們由庇護所邀請了幾位小孩來到她的舞台!

And now let's give a big holiday welcome to Grammy winning singer song writer Tori McLachlan!

所以請歡迎這位Grammy 得獎唱作人Tori McLachlan!

This song is called Merry Ex-Mas.

這首歌的名字是Merry Ex-Mas...

Ho ho ho ho ho ho.

Ho ho ho ho ho ho.

Fa la la la.

Fa la la la.

Every year during the season of cheer,

當每年來到這個喝采的季節

I'm crushed and drowned by the Yule tide.

我就會被聖誕壓碎並淹沒

On Christmas 2004 you walked out the door,

在04年的聖誕你走出了門外

And thus began my obsession with suicide.

而這就是我被自殺困擾的開始...

While other people bake cookies and ginger bread,

當其他人在製作曲奇和德式薑餅的時候(註1)

The only thing I want to put in my oven is my head.

我唯一想放入烤箱的是我自己的頭

To cover up my noose marks I wear turtle necks.

我要穿上樽領來遮掩我吊頸的痕跡

And it's all because of you, my Ex.

而引發這一切就是你, 我的前度

Merry Ex-Mas, you shattered my jingle bells.

Merry Ex-Mas, 你粉碎了我的聖誕鈴聲(註2)

Merry Ex-Mas, also known as the twelve days of hell.

Merry Ex-Mas, 也叫作12日地獄遊

Merry Ex-Mas, you've burnt me like a Yule log.

Merry Ex-Mas, 我就像聖誕樹幹蛋糕 (註3) 地被你燒了

Merry Ex-Mas, you took a leak in my egg nog.

Merry Ex-Mas, 你把蛋酒從我這裡拿走了

Merry Ex-Mas. Ho ho ho ho ho ho.

快樂的"前度節"... Ho ho ho ho ho ho.

I won a Grammy. Fa la la la.

我得了Grammy獎. Fa la la la.

Carolers come, their songs leave me so numb,

頌歌的人來了，他們的歌令我發呆

I sit nude, in the corner just rocking.

我在角落裡裸體坐著，身子慢慢地搖擺

And my stomach aches from eating seven fruit cakes, Still I feel empty as a poor child's stocking.

就算我吃蛋糕吃到胃痛了 仍然空虛得像窮孩子的聖誕襪一樣...

My white Christmas is black and my eyes are blood red.

我的白色聖誕是黑色的, 而我的雙眼已經變得血紅

I pray to angels except angels are just people who are dead.

我向天使祈禱但忘記了天使其實也只是死了的人!

My Santa Claus hat feels like a thorny crown, Cause menopause is coming to town.

我的聖誕帽就像基督所載的棘冠一樣 因為更年期來了...

Merry Ex-Mas, you've crushed my crush and my soul.

Merry Ex-Mas, 你粉碎了我的靈魂

Merry Ex-Mas, my heart is as black as a lump of coal.

Merry Ex-Mas, 我的心就像煤炭一樣的黑

Merry Ex-Mas, you've left me so lonely and pissed.

Merry Ex-Mas, 你離開後我既孤單又忿怒(註4)

Merry Ex-Mas, your death is at the top of my wish list.

Merry Ex-Mas, 在聖誕願望中我最最最希望的是你去死

Merry Ex-Mas, ho ho ho ho ho...

快樂的"前度節", ho ho ho ho ho...

Thank you very much. Thank you. Merry Christmas.

多謝. 多謝. 聖誕快樂...