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  • Hi! I'm Anne Ricketts with Lighthouse Communications. And today I want to share with you four tips

  • that will help you be more engaging during small talk. So a lot of people don't like

  • small talk. They think it's awkward or trivial. They don't understand why they have to talk

  • about the weather. They'd rather skip that and talk about business. But here's the thing:

  • small talk is really important. Among other things, it helps you build rapport with your

  • coworkers. And let's face it. People want to work with people who they like. It's also

  • the first impression that you give people and you want it to be a good one. So, let's

  • get into the tips for small talk. The first tip is always have a story. So, you want to think

  • about a specific story about a topic that is likely to come up. For example, on Mondays,

  • you pretty much know that the small talk topic of the day is going to be, What did you do

  • over the weekend? And instead of being general and saying, "Oh, not much. Just relaxed at

  • home." Think about something specific. It doesn't have to be -- you went bungee jumping.

  • It could be anything. Maybe you saw a really good movie on Netflix or maybe you tried out

  • a new Greek restaurant that you really liked. Tell people about it. And that will give people

  • much more to relate to, they can comment on, and it will be more interesting for them.

  • The second tip is you want to ask people questions and listen to them. So, people, they really

  • like to talk about themselves and if you take a genuine interest in them, and listen to

  • them, they will never forget you. So you want to, you know, ask people questions. But, here's

  • the thing. You really want to be careful about the "me too" syndrome. And what that is is

  • that, let's say, you ask me, "Anne, what are your hobbies?" And, I say, "Oh. I like to

  • run." "Oh, really? Me, too! I'm doing a race this weekend." Well, that comes from a good

  • place because you want to show me that you have a similar interest but the problem is

  • that you were taking an interest in me and now you are talking about yourself. And this

  • is pretty common. We all have had this happen to us and doesn't really feel good. So, instead,

  • listen to the person. Ask the question. Let them finish. And after they are done, you

  • can say, "Oh, you know what, I run too." And that's much better than interrupting them.

  • The third tip is you want to be present. Really be in the moment. These days we are so distracted

  • by all the things we have going on and we have, you know, our phones and our laptops

  • are always out. If you go look around anywhere you can see friends or couples together. Half

  • of them aren't really looking at each other but rather they are looking at their phones.

  • And the message that that sends to that person you are with is anything in this phone is

  • more interesting than what you are saying. And that really is not the message that we

  • want to be giving our coworkers and our friends. So think of small talk as an opportunity to

  • really practice your listening skills and be present. So put your phone in your pocket

  • and really hone in on the person you are talking to and really think about how I want this

  • person to feel at the end of this conversation. And, finally, the fourth tip is watch the

  • news or read the headlines for just five minutes each day. If you do that, you can know about

  • major topics in the news and if there is a lull in the conversation, you can bring that

  • topic up. For example, you can talk about the major storm that's hitting Hawaii or the

  • fact that the Oscar Pistorius trial is ending today. Something like that. And you want to

  • be careful though not to talk about 'heavy topics' like war or politics or religion because

  • that's not really appropriate for small talk. That might lead to a debate, if you don't

  • know someone very well, you want to steer clear of that. Another tip on the same note

  • is that if there is a major event in the news, let's say the World Cup or the Superbowl,

  • watch it. A lot of my English students say, oh gosh, that they're-- it's frustrating because

  • they feel like Americans always talk about sports and they don't watch American football

  • so they feel like they can't participate in small talk. And I'm not saying that you have

  • to become a football fan, but if there is something -- a big game on, watch it and that way

  • you can participate in the small talk topic for the next week. And you can also consider

  • it a cultural study. And, who knows? You might even like it. These are the four tips for

  • small talk. Try them out!

Hi! I'm Anne Ricketts with Lighthouse Communications. And today I want to share with you four tips

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小談的4個技巧。ESL系列視頻 (4 Tips for Small Talk: ESL Series Video)

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    Alex Wu 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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