Do you know what it is? I've made a mistake today when I got dressed. My name's Ronnie.

你知道發生什麼事嗎？我今天穿衣服的時候穿錯邊。我叫Ronnie。

Sometimes in the morning when I get dressed, I do things wrong, I make mistakes because

有時候早上著裝時，我事情常做錯，會這樣的原因是

it's so early. I mean, come on. Who wakes up that early and can get dressed properly?

時間還很早。我的意思是，拜託，有誰會那麼早起還能把衣服穿好的？

Today I'm going to teach you about mistakes you make when you get dressed. Some of them

今天我要告訴大家幾個你在穿衣服時會犯的錯誤，有些真的

are embarrassing, but I'll teach you what they mean, and what you're going to say to

很尷尬，我會教大家，萬一發現有人衣服穿錯時，當下的情況是如何，

someone if you notice an embarrassing mistake.

以及你要如何告知對方。

First of all, and the most embarrassing is: "Fly is down or open". Fly? Open fly. Fly,

首先，最尷尬的情況是，"拉鍊沒關"，(譯註：Fly有很多的意思)飛？展開翅膀飛翔，開飛機，

airplane, fly... What? "Your barn door is open". I don't even have a barn. What are

開...什麼東西阿？ "你的穀倉門是開著的。" 我根本就沒有穀倉，

you talking about? "Your fly is down or your fly is open." This means on your pants where

你到底在說什麼？ "你的拉鍊沒拉或你的拉練沒關。" 表示褲子讓

your little weenie comes out, or where you unzip your pants-zip-it means you forgot to

小鳥(男性生殖器)透氣的地方，或褲子拉鏈的地方忘記拉上

do the zipper up or the buttons up on your pants. Maybe people can see your underwear.

或扣上。其他人可能會看到你的內褲，

Oh, I hope you wore underwear. Oh, god, what could you see? So, one really embarrassing

喔，我希望你有穿。我的天阿，你會看到什麼樣的"景色"？所以，其中會發生在

thing that might happen to you is your fly is down, which means-zip-you didn't zip up

你身上的尷尬事情是，當你的拉鍊沒拉好，也就是說你忘記或沒有好好的

your pants. So I would say: "Do it up." I don't want to see your tighty whities or your

拉上拉鍊。這時候我可能會說："趕快拉好"，我不想看到你的緊身內褲或你的

superhero, Superman underwear. Or do I? Do you have Superman underwear? That would be

英雄、超人系列內褲，或者我還蠻想看的？你有超人內褲嗎？應該會很酷！

cool. Just do up your fly.

只要你有拉上拉鍊。

We have the next word: "inside out". This is what happened to me today. True story.

接下來一個情況是"穿錯邊"，這就是我今天發生的事，以下為真實故事，

I went to work, woke up in the morning, I put on my shirt, and I went to work, and I

我今天早上起床上班，我穿上我的襯衫然後上班去，

came home for lunchtime, and I noticed: Huh, my shirt is on inside out. That means that

之後我午餐時間回到家，我才發現，天阿！我的襯衫穿錯邊了。也就是說

the tag is sticking out and I need to reverse my shirt. So I can say: "My shirt is inside out."

衣服有標籤那面露出來，我必須把襯衫反過來穿。這時候我可以說："我的襯衫錯邊了。"

So, my mother would tell me: "Put it on properly." Which would mean I would take

我的媽媽可能會跟我說："把它穿好" 表示我要把

my shirt off, and put it right side in.

襯衫脫掉，然後從正確的那面穿下去。

Oh yeah, I've done this before, too. I've put my pants on backwards. How could...? How

沒錯，我曾經做過類似的糗事，我把褲子前後顛倒穿。這怎麼可能？

could you achieve such a feat? I am pretty spectacular when it comes to getting dressed.

你怎麼可能老是把衣服穿錯邊？ 說到穿衣服，我非常的驚人。

So: "My pants are on backwards." And again, you would say to the person: "Put them on

所以："我的褲子穿反邊" 再說一次，你可以跟對方說："把它穿好。"

properly." Have you ever put your pants on backwards, like not on purpose, by mistake?

你曾經褲子不小心或意外地穿錯邊嗎？

I've done it. I've ridden my bicycle. I was on my bike, went to the restaurant, went to

我有過。我騎過腳踏車。當時我騎車去一間餐廳，

look in my back pocket, realized my back pocket was my front pocket and went: "Yeah, these

手試著伸進褲子後口袋裡，才發現我的後口袋其實是我的前口袋，低頭一看："沒錯，我褲子

are on backwards." That's funny. I hope my fly's not down.

穿反邊了。" 超好笑的，我希望我的拉鍊有拉好。

And children do this. Do you have a child? Your child maybe has not learned yet the right

當小孩做以下這件事。你有小孩嗎？ 你的小孩可能還沒學會如何分辨右邊和

and left. It's a hard concept, don't laugh at them. So, maybe your daughter's shoe is

左邊。這是一個很難的概念，不要笑他們。也許你女兒的鞋子

"on the wrong foot", and she kind of walks differently like a duck. And you go: "Oh,

"穿錯腳"，她走起路來就像鴨子一樣，這時你說：

your shoe's on the wrong foot. Put it, put the shoe on the right foot." English is so

"你的鞋子穿錯腳了，重新穿，把鞋子穿在正確的腳上。" 英文讓人非常的

confusing because we have the right foot and the left foot, but we actually mean correct.

混淆，因為我們有右腳和左腳，但我們真正的意思是"正確"。(譯註：right的意思可以是"右邊"或"正確")

So: "Put it on the right foot", and you're like: "But I have one right foot and one left

所以："穿在正確的腳上。" 你就在想："我有一隻右腳的鞋子、一隻左腳的鞋子阿。"

foot." It means the correct foot.

但意思是"正確的腳上"

And you can have something "on the wrong hand". If you have mittens, okay? These are gloves,

你也有可能"穿錯手"，如果你有連指手套的話。這樣是手套，

these are mittens. Sometimes children put the mittens on the wrong hand, so it looks

這樣是連指手套。有時候小孩子會把連指手套戴錯手，所以

like their thumbs are over here. That's funny. They're like: "Hi, I'm a crab baby." And so:

他們的大拇指看起來在那邊，非常有趣，他們就像："你好，我是蟹寶寶。"

"His mitten is on the wrong hand." Again, we would say: "Put it on the right hand",

所以"他的連指手套戴錯邊。" 再一次，我們可以說："戴在右手上。"

and the left one, which means the correct hand.

或左手上(譯註：Ronnie在開雙關語的玩笑) 也就是正確的手上

This happens to me a lot. Something has become "untied"-this is an adjective-or "undone".

接下來這個事情我經常發生，有些東西常常"沒綁" - 這是形容詞 - 也可以用"undone"這個字。

So: "My shoelace is untied/undone." This means the same. So, what you're going to do is you're

"我的鞋袋沒綁好。" 這兩個意思是一樣的，所以你要做的是

going to "tie it up". Now, the other thing that you can say is: "My shoelaces are undone."

把它"綁好"。現在你也可以說："我的鞋帶們沒有綁好。"

We're not really too worried about the grammar in this, but you would say: "Tie them up."

我們並不怎麼擔心文法的使用，但你可以說："把它們綁好。"

Maybe somebody at your work is quite fat or chubby and they pop the button their shirt,

也許在你工作的地方上，有人非常胖或豐腴，他們襯衫上的鈕扣被繃開，

or they just didn't do up the button and you can see their tummy. Eww, their hairy, hairy

或者他們根本沒有扣好，以至於你可以看到他們的肚子。噁，超多毛髮的，

tummy. You can say: "His button is undone." or: "Her button is undone." And you would

多毛的肚子。你可以說："他的鈕扣沒扣好。" 或 "她的鈕扣沒扣好。" 之後你可以跟他們說

tell the person: "Do it up."

"穿好它。"

Oh, on the other hand, if a lady says to you... This beautiful lady, Judy Holliday, if she

另一方面，如果一個女士告訴你....這位美麗的女士~Judy Holliday。

says: "My dress, please undo my dress", you say: -"Yes, ma'am." -"Well, thank you, sailor.

如果她跟你說："請你幫我解開我的洋裝。" 你說："好的，女士。" -"謝謝你，水手，

Can't do it myself."

我無法自己動手。"

This irritates the crap out of me when my sock or my pants "keep falling down". So you're

當我的襪子或褲子"一直滑下去"，讓我非常的不舒服。當你出外時，

out, you're walking around, you got to pull them up and pull them off, or you have the

你四處走走，你必須要一直把褲子拉上來，或著你其中一隻

one sock that's lost its elasticity, which mean it just falls down constantly. One sock.

襪子沒有彈性了，所以不斷地向下滑。就只有一隻襪子如此。

The other sock's cool, it's doing its job, but the other sock keeps on falling down.

其中一隻的狀況很好，很盡責的在我腳上，但另一隻就一直往下滑，

So, you can say: -"My sock or my pants keep falling down." -"Pull it up." for the sock;

你可以說："我的襪子或我的褲子一直掉。" - 如果是襪子就說"拉上來"

"Pull them up." for the pants. Because pants are... Pants. Pants are plural... Try saying

如果是褲子就說"拉它們上來"，因為褲子就是..褲子，褲子是複數....

that seven times fast. Pants are plural, pants are plural. Pants, we have to use the

試著快速地說7次，褲子是複數、褲子是複數。因為褲子是複數，所以我們要用

plural of "them". "Pull them up." Because my sock is only one, you'd say: "Pull it up."

"它們"這詞，"拉它們上來。" 因為我的襪子只有一隻，你可以說："把它拉上來。"

Be careful.

要注意！

This one's kind of strange, too. If you have a shirt that buttons up like my shirt-you

下面這個情況也很奇怪。如果你有一件全扣式的襯衫，你可以看到像我身上這件，

can't see-sometimes you button it and it kind of looks like this, and you go: "Oh, man,

有時候你都扣起來了卻像這樣，你就會說："天啊，

what's happened to me today? I've skipped" or you can say: "I've missed a button." That

我今天怎麼了？我居然跳過了。" 或者你可以說："我少扣一顆鈕扣。"

means that the top button is the second button, and then you kind of look... Everyone kind

表示你最上面的鈕扣其實是第二顆，而你看起來就像....大家看起來

of looks crooked. So we would say: "Do it up again." So you have to undo it, do it up.

好像彎曲了一樣。這時候我們可以說："重新扣一遍。" 你必須把其他鈕扣解開，重新扣上。

This irritates me. Today I saw a lovely young lady, and her tag... She had her shirt on

接下來這件事讓我感到很懊惱。今天我看到一個年輕可愛的女士，她衣服上的標籤....她襯衫是正面的，

the right way. Her shirt was right side in, but her tag was sticking out. It was flipped

她沒有穿反，但標籤卻露了出來，標籤從她的襯衫翻轉

out and sticking out of her shirt. Now, I wanted to just fold it back in, but you can't

並探出頭來。我想要把標籤摺好放回衣服內，但你不能

just really go up to people and touch them. It's kind of weird, and illegal, and I don't

真的走向對方並觸碰他們，這很奇怪而且違法，我也不知道

know what repercussions that would have. But I wanted to tuck her tag in, because I could

會得到什麼樣的反應，但我想要把她的標籤塞回去，因為我看到

see it hanging out. So, if you say to someone: "Your tag is sticking out", they will say:

它跑出來。這時你如果跟對方說："你的標籤跑出來了。" 他們會回答："喔！"

"Oh", and they're going to stick it back in. Stick it in.

然後馬上把標籤塞回去，終於大功告成。

And last one, one of my favourites: "Your shirt is untucked." Did you go to a school

最後一個，也是我最喜歡的："你的衣服沒有扎進去。" 你有去過要穿

that had a uniform? I did. One thing I really, really, really, really hate doing is tucking

制服的學校嗎？我有。我最最最最最討厭的就是把襯衫

in my shirt. So that means your shirt is put inside of your massive camel toe of your pants.

扎進去。也就是說你把襯衫塞進你巨大駱駝趾的褲子裡。(譯著：褲子穿太緊導致把肉擠出來的模樣很像駱駝腳趾)

Oh, why do I have to draw things like this? So tucking in your shirt means you put your

天啊，為什麼我必須要畫這東西？ 所以把襯衫扎進去表示你要把衣服塞進

shirt inside your pants. Okay? If your shirt is untucked, it means that your shirt is not

你的褲子裡，了解嗎？如果你沒有扎，表示你的衣服沒有塞進

inside your pants. More comfortable, feels better, looks nicer, I think, but the school

褲子裡，但非常的舒服、感覺很棒、看起來很漂亮，但我去的

that I went to was adamant: "You tuck in your shirt." Why? Does it make me smarter if I

那間學校很固執："你給我扎衣服！" 為什麼？如果我扎衣服，可以讓我看起來更聰明？

tuck in my shirt? Does it make my life better if I tuck in my shirt? Hell no. I am not tucking

如果我照做，可以讓我的人生更好？當然不可能，我可不要扎衣服。

in my shirt. This landed me a couple hours in detention, which means I had to stay after

結果我被留校察看幾個小時，我必須放學後留在學校，

school, because I didn't tuck in my shirt. It's your choice. You can tuck your shirt

因為我沒有扎衣服，這是你的選擇，你可以選擇扎衣服，

in or you can untuck your shirt. Usually at a job, if it's a very formal office setting,

或者不扎。通常在職場上，如果有一場正式的會議，

you must tuck in your shirt. If your shirt is untucked, you got to tuck it in.

你必須要扎衣服，如果你的衣服還沒有塞進褲子裡，你必須馬上這麼做。

Have you ever had any of these embarrassing dressing mistakes happen to you? If so, let

你曾經有過這些穿衣上的尷尬糗事嗎？如果有，

me know. I'm going to go and change. See you later.

請讓我知道。現在我要去換衣服了，我們下次見。