字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 - You know, I was going to come out here and I was going to talk about the economy, and whether or not the government should ease regulatory restrictions on financial institutions, but I think I would rather play a game. Doesn't that sound like more fun? [loud cheers and applause] So-- [cheers and applause] There's a show called idiot test on... [audience laughter] Game Show Network, Have you seen the show, "Idiotest"? [cheers and applause] Yeah. You have? So we played it once here, before-- 'cause I assumed we did not have any idiots in the audience, and I was--I was mistaken, I was sadly mistaken. [audience laughter] Because I-- I just assume you're not idiots, and I know today we have no idiots in the audience, so I feel safe to play the game with you today, and know--just to reassure the world watching that you're not idiots. Here's the unfortunate thing: if we find out you are an idiot, you're going to have to sit in an idiot section for the entire show... [audience laughter] [audience laughter] With a ridiculous hat on. So-- [audience laughter] Well, anyway, you're not idiots. What am I thinking? You don't have to-- Let's see who--who is sure they're not an idiot? It's an easy one, okay? - Okay. - They get harder from here. - Okay. - What is something-- what can animals make that no other animal can? (woman) What an elephant--what can an elephant make? - You--I know what I'm saying. [audience laughter] Turns out I'm an idiot. [audience laughter] - What-- what can an elephant make that no other animal can make? - Um... [audience laughter] Tusks? - Yes, well, that might be true. There are other animals that have tusks, though. - Oh, correct, right. [audience laughter] They don't live in Glendora, though, so-- - What it is is a baby elephant. - Oh! [laughs] [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] - You're gonna head--come here. [cheers and applause] Get over there. (audience) Oh! Sorry. [applause] [applause] All right. [audience laughter] Here we go. - Okay. This is relatively easy as well. A boy is walking down the road with a doctor. - Mm-hmm. - The boy is the doctor's son. But the doctor isn't the boy's father. How is that possible? - The doctor's a woman. - Exactly! [cheers and applause] Yay! [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] Good for you! [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] Yay! [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] Okay, what month do people sleep the least? - [whispering inaudibly] Now I feel like an idiot. Um... - You'll feel more like one when you sit next to her. [audience laughter] - June? - June? And why would you say that? - 'Cause it's the beginning of summer. - No, it's February because they have less days. - Oh, I feel so dumb! [cheers and applause] - Yeah. No, an idiot, not dumb. That way. A cowboy rides into town on Friday. He stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How does he do it? - Oh, God. - Cowboy rides into town on Friday, stays for three days... - And-- - Leaves on Friday. How could he do that? - Uh... [audience laughter] I don't know. I don't know. - You don't know? - I don't know. - The horse's name is Friday. [cheers and applause] Go join them. All right, here you go. You're locked in a freezing cabin, with no way out. There is a candle, a wood stove, and a lantern. You only have one match. What do you light first? You want me to say it again? - The-- - You're locked in a-- You're in a freezing cabin. - Right. - It's freezing, right? No way out. There's a candle, a wood stove, a lantern. You have one match. What do you light first? - The stove. - Mm. Well, most people would say the candle, so you could light all those other things, but it's actually the match. All right. [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] Lemar? Join them. Jane was born on December 28th, yet her birthday always falls in the summer. How is that possible? [whispering inaudibly] This is ridiculously easy. [audience laughter] - Is it? - Yep. - Can you say it one more time? - All right. Jane was born on December 28th, yet her birthday always falls in the summer. How is that possible? - Can I have a lifeline? - Hmm? - I'll just go on over there. - All right. [audience laughter] [cheers and applause] By the way, for playing, each of you idiots over there, you're getting a $500 Best Buy gift card, so-- [cheers and applause] We reward that! [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] And you, too, yes. [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] And the rest of you get this dance!
B1 中級 美國腔 超爆笑!你能通過傻瓜測驗嗎?(Do You Pass the Idiot Test?) 9979 507 劉十九 發佈於 2015 年 06 月 25 日 更多分享 分享 收藏 回報 影片單字