So.

所以

How do you weigh a fart?

要怎麼衡量你的屁？

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Dr. Michael Levitt, who has decades

擁有數十年消化學研究經驗的

of research experience in flatology,

邁可·列維特博士指出

indicates that the typical daily volume

在一般室溫

output is between half a liter and 2 liters

正常人每天的排屁量應該

of gas once cooled to room temperature.

介於 0.5 - 2 公升

If you pretend that the fart obeys the ideal gas

如果你覺得屁符合高中化學課所教的

law from high school chemistry class, which it probably

理想氣體定律，是有可能

does to a decent approximation, you

蠻接近的

could work out the mass of the fart

藉由得知平均的屁分子結構

once you know the average molecular mass

你就能得出

of a fart particle.

屁的重量

To get that, we need to know what gases are in a fart

為了研究那些，我們必須要知道屁裡

and what ratio they're found in.

蘊含那些氣體，以及它們的比重

This turns out to vary a lot by person and by diet.

但這因每個人的飲食習慣而有差異

I ballparked some average numbers from a paper

我根據一個藥學期刊中的文章

in a medical journal that measured the gas

粗略估計了如果一個人

mix in 10 subjects who had been fed

每天能有正常飲食加上一代煮豆子的話

a normal diet plus a bunch of baked beans each day.

那他的屁可能至少就會有十種分子

I got a density of around 1 gram per liter.

得到屁的密度大概是每公升一克

Now, I'm going to assume that our intrepid astronaut has

現在我要去假設一位堅忍不拔的太空人

recently downed a burrito or two,

才剛下吃下一個或兩個墨西哥捲

and would produce 1 full liter, i.e.

排出的完整一公升的屁，也就是說

1 gram worth of fart mass over a 24 hour period.

在 24 小時內排出約 1 公克的屁

For a per fart analysis, assuming a typical 10

來分析每個屁的質量，假設這段時間內

to 20 individual farts over the same period,

你會排 10 - 20 不等的屁

you would get somewhere between 0.05

你對得到每個屁大概 0.05 - 0.1 克重

and 0.1 grams of mass per fart.

的結論

That number may be off by a factor of two or so,

這個數字可能會上下變動 2 倍左右

but I doubt it's off by a factor of 10.

但應該不會差到 10 被這麼多

And that's how you weigh a fart.

而這就是你測量屁的方法

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