Were you ever good at sports?

這是你上大學的模樣

we don't know

(代表)

but the daily 4 a.m burrito haven't help

這些是六種妳會泡到的正妹

you ok?

運動型

she looks better in track shorts than literally anything else.

你是否對運動在行?

come on baby

我們不清楚

you can do it

但是每天打怪升級，敏捷力超高都沒用

Ten more yards to touchdown!

你還好嗎?

However no matter what the activity

她穿運動短褲，比甚麼都好看

You'll always end up in the same way

北鼻你行的!

wheezing

再用力點

dowie

再10碼就達陣了

And begging her to slow down

然而不管你做甚麼運動

you hate places like this

結局都是一樣的

never mind

氣喘吁吁

you love places like this

虛脫

I love places like this

求她慢一點

your friend is promoter

夜店咖

or DJ

你討厭像這樣的地方

whichever is cooler

算了

you're funny

你愛死這個地方

Is there non-alphabetical difference

我愛死這個地方

between E & X ?

你的朋友是企畫總監

Cut to six weeks later

或DJ

You're out of money, too tired

只要是帥氣都好

And have no idea what your pants are made of

你這人好有趣

wake up

E 跟X 之間

I know the bouncer at the Prolaps.

除了順序以外還有甚麼不同嗎

You wouldn't give up this nap

往前加速6個月

for all the coked-up sex in the world.

你口袋空空，全身疲憊

Happy dinosaur ridding

並且根本不知道自己的褲子是用甚麼做的

Face it, you're a nice guy

快起來!

Did you call all these beers?

我認識俱樂部的圍事

But to her, you're James Dean with Wolverine claws.

就算給你全世界的古柯鹼

It fun to play a crazy guy

你也不想從床上起來

but no crazy like real repressed crazy

瞌藥快樂!

Not tonight ?

教會型

No

面對吧! 你是個好人

Fine!

你喝了這麼多的啤酒嗎?

The worse parts ?

對她來說你就像是裝著金鋼狼爪子的詹姆斯狄恩 (青春叛逆偶像)

She still going to wake you up for 8 a.m. mass

扮演一個瘋子是蠻有趣的

This is it

但是沒有綑綁PLAY來的瘋

The perfect tan

今晚不要?

What years of television,print advertising and internet porn have taught you.

不要

Baby

隨你

You're not using the couple's wallpaper I gave you?

最糟的瞬間?

Why you?

等她早上把你挖起來參加8點的彌撒就知道了

because she saw a Wes Anderson's trailer once

胸大無腦

and thinks you're a corky

就是她了

Who cars

完美的棕褐色

Look at her

多年來從電視、海報及網路A片學來的知識告訴你

How long will it last ?

北鼻!!

Once your talents for crippling insecurities and Kesha

你怎麼沒用我給你的情侶桌面?

You watching Teen Mom without me!

為什麼是你?

You just like my dad 你就像我爸

因為她看過一部魏斯‧安德森的電影預告

You'll keep a picture of her to show to friends

覺得是你是個傻子

She'll not

管他的，誰在乎。

She is not girl

她那麼正

You driving like my flappy virginia

誰在乎天長地久

And all you're doing is wondering what she is doing there with you

只要你削弱她的不安全感，和對錢的知識一用盡。

You're the one with Liberal Art degree

你沒等我先偷跑看「少女媽媽」?