Today, we're getting naked for the internet again.

我們今天又要在網路上裸體了

We're trying on Valentine's Day Lingerie.

這次要試穿情人節情趣內衣

We're back, baby.

我們回來啦！

I have no experience with sexy lingerie, which is kind of sad.

我對性感內衣一無所知，太傷心了

Maybe it'll get us all in the mood.

也許它會讓我們興致勃勃

I'm wearing a dance belt and were hiding it because the dance belt still looks gross.

我在穿舞蹈護褲，但我會把它遮住，因為護褲看起來還是很噁心 (dance belt是男舞者在跳舞時為保護重要部位所穿的內褲)

How's the bottom? The most great!

我的屁股看起來如何？超讚的！

Thank you!

謝啦

(Corset&Heart panties)

(馬甲 & 心形小褲褲)

This is a corset, right? Of course it is.

這是馬甲對吧？沒錯它就是

Uhh...I already hate this because there are way too many clasps on it.

痾....我已經開始討厭這個了，上面實在太多鉤子要鉤了

I feel like the sexiest thing clothes can do is be easy to take off.

我覺得最性感的衣服就是要好脫

I feel like I'm talking a little higher because it's just like soaking everything in.

我覺得我講話變高音了，就像要把一切吸進去一樣

The pressure literally pushes that burp out of me

這壓迫感把我的嗝從體內推出

It's like I'm being punished for dating you.

好像因為跟你約會而被懲罰一樣

How expensive is this nonsense?

這鬼東西多貴啊？

It's like Disney version of sexy.

像是迪士尼版本的性感

I like this....

我喜歡這個....

I'm looking at this and I'm confused cuz there are like so many leg holes.

我看著這個，覺得疑惑，怎麼有這麼多讓腿穿過的洞洞啊

Oh no! That's not a leg hole. That's a bottom.

噢！這不是讓腿穿過的洞洞，這是給屁股露出來的洞

Oh...yeah....

噢~耶~

I'm afraid to bend down cuz the string may never escape me.

我不敢彎下腰，因為那條線不會放過我 (指若彎下腰，胯下的那條線會往上卡到重要部位)

Oh, this hurts! The fabric is scratching my stomach.

噢，痛！這衣服要劃傷我的胃了

They don't show that part in sexy movie is like you know you gotta prepare.

在性感電影裡都沒有演這個準備橋段

I think this is more trouble than it's worth. I think if they have this like a velcro, yeah...

我覺得這麻煩的成分多過它的價值，如果把這些改成魔鬼沾，那就太棒了

(Racy Bodysuit) What the f**k is this!

(情趣緊身衣) 這X小！

What!

什麼！

This one is really selling something, you know.

這真的太騙人了

Bam, I missed...

碰！我想念....

When I saw this on my "how you cover the boobs," the answer is you don't.

你要怎麼遮住胸部？答案是，你根本不遮的

I need someone's help.

我需要幫忙

How can anyone without an engineering degree figure this out!

沒有工程學位的人怎麼解得開這個！

This is a Rubik's Cube of lingerie.

這是性感內衣之魔術方塊

Who knew being sexy was so hard.

誰會知道要性感這麼難

Does it looks like a box? No.

這看起來像個盒子嗎？不

Does it look like a sexy train wreck of cables? Yes.

這看起來像性感大災難嗎？是

If it's even half this hard to take off as it was to put on, this is not worth it.

如果脫掉它有穿上它一半的困難的話，這不值得

I don't think man would do Valentine's Day if they had this type of suit.

我覺得男生不會想在情人節做什麼，如果他們看到這種內衣

That's a lot of butt. I don't think anyone would look great in this.

露太多屁屁了。我覺得沒有人穿上會是好看的

It does make me feel differently about Valentine's Day. It makes me feel like I'm not missing much.

它確實讓我對情人節有不同的感受，讓我覺得不太想念情人節

(Babydoll dress)

(甜心性感睡衣)

I don't like the name of that. We should rename this.

我不喜歡這個名稱，我們應該重新命名。

This is what I picture. This is what I think lingerie should be.

這就是我想像的，性感內衣應該呈現的樣子

I bet people like this.

我打賭大家愛這個

What else is there to say. It's cute.

還有什麼好說，這太可愛了

First of all, easy access.

首先，這很容易侵入

It's good cuz I'm flexible to go in like all different sorts of positions.

這很好，我可以很靈活地變化各種姿勢

I feel like a bird.

我是一隻鳥~

Like a nice or gentle breeze on my legs that I'm not quite used to.

我還不太習慣有微風吹過我的腿

This one is cozy. I feel like a woman could be sexy yet comfortable.

這個好舒服，我覺得女人可以穿得舒服又性感

If my wife wore this, I would be turned on.

如果我老婆穿這個，我會慾火焚身

(Bow suit)

(蝴蝶結裝)

I forgot to get you a present, present.

我忘了給你禮物了~

This is ripped already.

這已經被撕破了

I assume Ned is to blame.

我想這要怪Ned (Ned是他們其中一人)

Now, we're....Oh...I ripped tit.

現在我們...噢! 我扯到奶頭了

This will make so few people look better.

沒什麼人穿了這個會比較好看

I look like the man of the nudist colony.

我看起來像裸體主義群裡的男人

Like the day you found out Satan is real.

像你發現撒旦是真的的那天一樣

Does that look like breast?

看起來像胸部嗎？

My boob keeps popping out. Get back in there.

我們胸部一直露出來，快回去

If I'd like to be straight up, it rams the string up my bottom.

如果我把身體挺直，那條線就會往上塞到我的屁股

I just feel bad. The girls always have things up their butts. You know.

我覺得很糟，女生屁股裡總是卡著東西

Almost like getting a prostate exam.

根本像做攝護腺檢查

It's very obvious to me that this is not made for all body types.

很明顯這不適合所有的身形

You'd better be buying me a nice dinner tonight. I'm talking like...we get dessert, too.

你今晚最好請我吃大餐，要有甜點的

They have man lingerie? I'm not doing this.

有男性性感內衣？我不要穿

I know it's a lot of works to put on Valentine's Day lingerie.

我知道穿情趣內衣耗費很多心力

Do I still like the way it looks? I do....

我還喜歡它的樣子嗎？喜歡....

From trying on lady's underwear before I already know it's fairly uncomfortable and sexy.

由於之前穿過女性內衣，我知道穿內衣很不舒服，雖然很性感

This is just extremely uncomfortable and less sexy.

但這真的是超級不舒服而且不太性感

If it makes you feel good, and it makes your partner thinks you look extra great, then I think it's fantastic.

如果這讓你覺得很好，讓你的另一半覺得你看起來更美，那我覺得這是很棒的事

I mean the point of this is just like we just wanna have sex, right?

我是說情趣內衣的目的就是要炒飯，對吧？

So...let's skip this and just get to it.

所以...跳過這項，直接來吧！

Hold on. Isn't it the problem with it? It's so hard to take it off.

等等，這不就是問題嗎？太難脫了