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  • [music playing]

  • -Lad, the idea is, I make a move, you make a move.

  • Not I make a move, wait half an hour,

  • then drop dead of boredom.

  • -If you do, do I win?

  • -Just make a move.

  • -OK.

  • My horse takes your king.

  • -How'd you figure that out?

  • -My horse countercepts your pawn, gallops

  • around your bishop, jumps over your queen,

  • and lands on your king, squishing him to a pulp.

  • -Yes!

  • You know, one day they might invent

  • a computer that can beat me.

  • -Great.

  • Then we could hang out with it instead of you.

  • -Ha.

  • Ha.

  • You don't have to be here.

  • You don't even like chess.

  • -I like chess.

  • You know why?

  • It's got absolutely nothing to do with vampires.

  • No bats, no blood, no--

  • [door opening]

  • VAN HELSING: All right, listen up.

  • -No slayers.

  • -Miss Clellans had an unfortunate accident on the way

  • here.

  • So you'll be delighted to hear, I'm

  • taking the Chess Club this evening.

  • -Aw.

  • -Very funny.

  • Now settle down.

  • And I suggest you concentrate.

  • -But, that's check mate.

  • -Only then will you become a grand chess

  • master like the great Chandu.

  • -Shan who?

  • -Chandu.

  • Chandu was a Hungarian count from the 18th century,

  • and remains the greatest chess player who ever lived.

  • -I've never heard of him.

  • -That's hardly surprising.

  • But I'm sure your father will know who he is.

  • Which reminds me.

  • This is from the Headmistress.

  • -Aw, please, not parent's evening.

  • -It's a reminder that all parents must attend.

  • -If Dad sees this, it'll be a disaster.

  • I've got to get rid of it.

  • -But Master Vlad, won't you get in terrible trouble?

  • It's from your headmistress.

  • -I know.

  • And it'd be great for Dad to take

  • an interest in my school work, but-- no.

  • There's just no way.

  • It's too dangerous.

  • -Oh.

  • Ah.

  • -There, now that'll be the end of it.

  • -Parent's evening.

  • What a marvelous idea.

  • -Where did you get that letter?

  • -Ingrid gave it to me.

  • I have to say, parent's evening sounds great fun.

  • -You don't even know what it is.

  • -Lots of parents feasting on the blood

  • of their least favorite offspring?

  • -Not quite.

  • It's where you come and talk to our teachers

  • about how we're doing at school.

  • -Ugh.

  • Sounds ghastly.

  • In that case, I'm not going.

  • Oh, really Vladimir, tell me you're

  • not losing to a stuffed dog.

  • -Grr.

  • -He's a wolf.

  • -Either way, you're going to have

  • to practice if you want to be as good as me.

  • The greatest chess player to stalk the earth.

  • -I thought that was the Great Chandu.

  • -What did you say?

  • -The Great Chandu.

  • Mr. Van Helsing said he was the best chess player in the world.

  • -[roars]

  • -What did I say?

  • -I am the greatest chess player ever.

  • And I can prove it.

  • -OK.

  • As nice as it is to be involved in family business for once,

  • I was painting my nails.

  • -Be quiet, Ingrid!

  • This is important.

  • What I am about to tell you is the story

  • of how you and your brother came to be.

  • -Oh no, you're not going to tell us

  • about the birds and the bees, are you?

  • -Now listen.

  • 300 years ago, Chandu and I were in love with the same girl.

  • Your mother Magda.

  • -So to decide who should win her affections, we played chess.

  • -Romantic.

  • -For centuries, chess has settled

  • all matter of gentlemanly disputes.

  • Destiny decided she and I would be together forever.

  • -Until she ran off with a werewolf.

  • -While Chandu suffered the fate of all losers.

  • Death by mummification.

  • -[coughing]

  • -So you see?

  • Here lies proof that I am indeed the best chess player ever.

  • -Is that it?

  • You dragged us all the way down here just to tell us

  • you beat some stinking mummy at chess?

  • -Next time Mr. Van Helsing tells me something,

  • I'll keep it to myself.

  • -Vladimir, no one slurs the name of a Dracula!

  • Now go.

  • Leave me with my memories.

  • I want to be alone.

  • --[whistling] Just uh, dusting your bat collection, Master.

  • -Curse that teacher.

  • Saying Chandu is better than me!

  • -Surely you won't let him get away with it, Master.

  • -Renfield, I think the time has finally

  • come to venture into the world of breathers.

  • -Uh, Vladimir, about this, this parent's evening--

  • -I know.

  • You'd rather cut off your arms and feed

  • them to a giant dung beast.

  • -Well they were Ingrid's arms actually.

  • But the point is, all this talk of you mother

  • has made me realize you deserve one parent there at least.

  • -Don't worry about it.

  • -No, no, no.

  • It's no problem.

  • -I really don't mind.

  • -I'm coming.

  • -You can't.

  • It's not safe for you to go in daylight.

  • -Well, it'll be a challenge.

  • -A challenge?

  • You'll melt.

  • And what if you bite someone?

  • The place'll be full of breathers.

  • -Yes.

  • I know.

  • -Dad!

  • -Oh really, Vladimir.

  • You should have more faith in me.

  • -[sigh]

  • -I'm going to parent's evening tomorrow.

  • And that is final.

  • Wuh-wuh.

  • Ha, ha, ha.

  • -[sigh] Now what do I do?

  • if Dad bites someone at school, I'll be on the first ship

  • back to Transylvania.

  • -Buy a cabin by the window?

  • [laughter]

  • [thunder]

  • -I can't believe you gave Dad that letter.

  • Have you any idea how dangerous that is?

  • What if he runs into Mr. Van Helsing?

  • -That loser?

  • He's no match for Dad.

  • You're just worried he'll hear what a goody two fangs you are.

  • Whereas, when he hears how wicked and evil I am,

  • he'll have to be proud of me.

  • -Ah, I can't wait to leave the castle.

  • Do me good to stretch my wings.

  • -Dad, you can't turn into a bat at school.

  • -Oh, too showy?

  • -Too, oh, Vlad's Dad's a vampire.

  • -Breather lover's got a point.

  • Maybe you shouldn't wear the cape either.

  • -Ah.

  • Not even if I wear this with it?

  • INGRID: Especially not if you wear that.

  • -Right.

  • You know, really, you two relax.

  • What's the worst that can happen? [laughs]

  • -Parent's evening.

  • -Don't.

  • Just the words, "parent's evening,"

  • sounds like someone's screaming inside my head.

  • -Your Dad is coming to parent's evening?

  • What if Van Helsing finds out?

  • He'll denounce him in front of everybody.

  • -That's if he doesn't run a great big stake

  • through your Dad's heart.

  • -Shush!

  • -Yes, I know.

  • I tried talking him out of it, but you know what he's like.

  • What am I going to do?

  • -Look, don't panic.

  • Robin and I will make sure that Van Helsing

  • stays well away from your Dad.

  • -Yes!

  • Ah!

  • Jonathan!

  • You know I can't stand skeletons,

  • they give me the creeps!

  • -Sorry.

  • We can't exactly water the biology display.

  • -Well, get rid of it.

  • We've got work to do.

  • Count Dracula is coming to parent's evening,

  • and do you know why?

  • -He's a parent?

  • -No, because of my careful research.

  • I knew I'd lure him out of the castle sooner or later.

  • Jonno, prepare yourself for a showdown.

  • -They'll uh, never guess you're a vampire wearing this, Master.

  • And it's 100% sun-proof.

  • -You've done well, Renfield.

  • Now for the final touch.

  • Sunglasses.

  • The other ones.

  • Mm.

  • Perfect.

  • That Van Helsing won't know what bit him.

  • -Now Robin, it doesn't matter what your teachers say tonight,

  • so long as you've gotten over this morbid obsession

  • with vampires.

  • -Yes, Mum.

  • -And if not, we've decided to send you to Happy Camp.

  • -Happy Camp?

  • -It's where troubled children go to learn how to be happy.

  • -Through happy music and happy dance.

  • -Ugh, just kill me now.

  • -Right.

  • Won't take me long to deal with that woodwork teacher.

  • In fact, go fetch a bottle of my finest blood.

  • If I can't drink it, I'll just admire it.

  • -Yes Master.

  • -Mr. And Mrs. Branagh, it's nice to meet you.

  • I'm Mr. Perkins, Robin's art teacher.

  • -Oh, it's lovely to meet you.

  • Art is Robin's favorite subject.

  • Even as a toddler, he was always drawing.

  • -What was it you used to paint, Robin?

  • -Dad, I don't know.

  • -Oh yes, that's right. Big, pink, bunny rabbits.

  • -Dad!

  • -Rabbits.

  • Interesting.

  • And when--

  • [wind blowing]

  • -And when-- did you feel that?

  • -Must be a draft.

  • My neck's just gone completely cold.

  • [thunder]

  • -Hooey!

  • Mr. Count!

  • -Oh, no.

  • It's that interminable Branagh woman.

  • Just ignore her.

  • -Dad!

  • Lights!

  • -Mm.

  • There.

  • Happy now?

  • -Right.

  • From now on, we keep on high alert.

  • If Van Helsing finds out the Count's here--

  • -Chloe!

  • Mom and Dad are threatening to send me to Happy Camp

  • if tonight doesn't go well.

  • I've got problems too, you know.

  • -OK.

  • Fine.

  • I'll go protect our best friend's

  • entire existence on my own then.

  • -[whistling]

  • [sniffing] Ah!

  • Ya!

  • Hnh!

  • Hee!

  • Hm.

  • [whistling]

  • -Oh, great.

  • Looks like we're seeing the Headmistress first.

  • She really doesn't like me.

  • -Oh, really Vladimir, Draculas don't queue.

  • -Mr. Count, please!

  • These people are-- were in a queue.

  • -I say, what a delicious looking neck you have.

  • -Pardon?

  • -Necklace.

  • He meant to say necklace.

  • -And you smell so-- [inhales] so fresh.

  • [kiss]

  • --[gasps] well I suppose I could see you now.

  • I have a whole list of Ingrid's offenses to discuss with you.

  • -Hmm.

  • Really?

  • -As I was saying, when did Robin stop drawing rabbits,

  • and start drawing this kind of thing?

  • I have to ask.

  • Is Robin happy at home?

  • -Oh, Dad!

  • Everyone's wondering where you are.

  • You're a teacher, you've got responsibilities.

  • -My responsibility is to rid the world of vampires,

  • using this Transylvanian torch.

  • -Why am I not going to like this.

  • -This torch has harnessed sunlight itself.

  • It took years to find.

  • Now, when the Count comes in here,

  • I'll jump up, shine the torch in his face,

  • it'll vaporize him into a big, gloopy heap

  • of steaming remains.

  • -Huh, cleaners will be happy.

  • -Here.

  • Give this to Vlad.

  • It'll make sure the Count's next appointment is in here

  • with me and this little beauty.

  • -Hi.

  • -Hi.

  • -Do you hear all this, Vlad?

  • Ingrid is causing misery and mayhem wherever she goes.

  • Now that is how a true Dracula should behave.

  • I'm very disappointed in you.

  • Oh, hold on.

  • Don't I know him?

  • -Hi Ingrid.

  • My dad asked me to give you this.

  • -If my son keeps staring at you, feel

  • free to dangle his head down the toilet.

  • -Really?

  • -No.

  • Get lost.

  • Looks like we're seeing Mr. Van Helsing next.

  • -Are you crazy?

  • He can't see Mr. Van Helsing.

  • -Vladimir!

  • What's that behind your back?

  • -Nothing.

  • -Vampire reflexes.

  • Don't mess with the master.

  • Oh, at last.

  • That slanderous woodwork teacher.

  • -This is going to be a disaster.

  • -Vlad, Van Helsing is up to something.

  • Your dad is in real danger.

  • -Chill out.

  • Dad's right here.

  • Dad?

  • -Dad?

  • -So, Mr. Van Helsing, Chandu is better at chess than me, is he?

  • Well, I've got two fangs says he isn't.

  • -Excuse me.

  • Are you a famous rock star?

  • -What?

  • Go away, I'm busy.

  • Actually, come closer and say that.

  • -Can we have your autograph?

  • -[sniffing] You two scram.

  • Go!

  • [sniffing] Ah!

  • Chandu.

  • I thought I recognized that foul stench.

  • You're looking well.

  • Have you, uh, lost some weight?

  • Calm down, Chandu!

  • I can explain!

  • -Ugh!

  • [sniffing]

  • -Aha!

  • Gotcha!

  • Vampire scum.

  • -Dad, Dad!

  • -Where's the Count?

  • -I don't know.

  • Thanks for the concern.

  • You nearly blinded me.

  • -What's that job doing.

  • Well, come on, we've got a vampire to catch.

  • -I can't believe Rob.

  • -My dad's about to have a one on one with a vampire slayer,

  • where is he?

  • -Don't worry, he'll have plenty of time

  • to worry about it in Happy Camp.

  • -Great.

  • Now what do we do?

  • -[roar]

  • -What was that?

  • -I don't know.

  • -[roar]

  • -Give it to me!

  • -I'm guessing this is where one of us goes in and finds out.

  • -Huh!

  • -[roar]

  • -Bonehead.

  • -Dad?

  • -Chandu.

  • -Ah.

  • Children, um, Chandu and I were just catching up on old times.

  • Weren't we, Chandu?

  • -[growl]

  • -Uh.

  • -What's that behind your back?

  • -Um, nothing, nothing.

  • Oh, how dare you!

  • -Ah, Teenage reflexes, don't mess with the master.

  • A chess rulebook.

  • Dad, what's going on?

  • -Uh--

  • -Robin is certainly a very creative child,

  • and has written some very interesting essays.

  • -That's great.

  • May not have to go to Happy Camp after all.

  • -Yes, there's "Why I Love Vampires,"

  • "My Best Friend's a Vampire," "Why I Want to Be a Vampire,"

  • "Harry Vampire and the Goblet of Bats."

  • -So, this is the greatest chess player who ever lived.

  • -Second greatest.

  • Chandu was the best, yes.

  • And I beat him and won Magda's affections.

  • -But you said, all losers shall suffer death by mummification.

  • And Chandu's alive.

  • Sort of.

  • -"Losers of the great game shall suffer death by mummification,

  • unless a player doth cheat, in which case the loser shall walk

  • the earth, until justice has been passed."

  • -You cheated.

  • -Well, I may have moved one piece when he wasn't looking.

  • -Ah, go Dad!

  • -I can't believe you cheated.

  • It means you and mum should have never got together.

  • Which means I should never have been born.

  • No wonder I've never felt like a real vampire.

  • -I feel like a real vampire.

  • -Vladimir.

  • It thaws my frozen heart to hear you say such a thing.

  • How can I prove our family was meant to be?

  • -You could challenge Chandu to a rematch.

  • Or not.

  • -[sniffing] You smell that?

  • Like rotting flesh.

  • -Evening.

  • -Mr. Perkins Always smells like that.

  • -No.

  • The undead have walked this way.

  • [sniff] Come on, follow your nose.

  • -A rematch.

  • Good idea, Chloe.

  • Unless of course Dad loses and has to be mummified.

  • -Haven't you got any faith in him?

  • -How does the little horsey move again?

  • -OK.

  • I've got a plan.

  • Who do we know that's really good chess?

  • Who's a really good friend of yours.

  • Who's related to me.

  • How your family's lasted this long, I'll never know.

  • -Although I have to say, when Robin's talking about vampires,

  • at least he's paying attention.

  • In some classes, it's as if he's not even there.

  • -Robin, is this true?

  • Robin?

  • -Robin?

  • -Vlad, let me go!

  • Mom's already threatened to send me to Happy Camp.

  • -OK.

  • Quick update.

  • Ugly zombie dude's about to whip Vlad's cheating dad at chess.

  • If he does, guess who gets mummified?

  • -Whoa.

  • This guy's good.

  • His opening is genius.

  • Have you asked him if he wants to join Chess Club?

  • -All right, all right, don't rush me!

  • There.

  • What do you think about that?

  • -[laughing]

  • -Laughing, huh?

  • Why is he laughing?

  • Oh.

  • -That's check mate.

  • -Oh.

  • -What?

  • Well, it can't be!

  • Ah.

  • Now, Chandu, surely we can talk about this.

  • I mean, after all, you're a reasonable--

  • -Stake wielding zombie!

  • -Stake her, not me!

  • -Dad!

  • -Robin, think!

  • There must be something you can do about this.

  • -Vlad, it's check mate, the whole idea

  • is there is no way out.

  • -Chandu, please!

  • Look at the mess, look at the mess.

  • -Stop!

  • -Wait!

  • Look!

  • How many black knights are on the board?

  • -One, two, three.

  • -Quick, Vlad!

  • Check his pockets!

  • -Ugh.

  • [squish]

  • -Ugh.

  • spare pieces.

  • -No wonder you couldn't beat him.

  • -Of all the scheming, conniving-- actually,

  • why didn't I think of that?

  • But this means you've won.

  • -Oh.

  • -And Chandu faces death by mummification.

  • Again.

  • -I don't know.

  • It seems a bit unfair.

  • Especially when your Dad cheated in the first place.

  • -And kept him locked in a coffin for 300 years.

  • -All right, all right.

  • Enough with the guilt trip.

  • Oh, Chandu, let's, let's, let's not, let's just call it quits.

  • -Nice one Dad.

  • -Besides, I have bigger fish to fry.

  • [sniffing]

  • -We've got him son.

  • You remember the plan?

  • -I open the door.

  • You shine the torch in the Count's face.

  • -Then we watch him melt or vaporize.

  • I wonder what he'll do.

  • -That's why you shine the torch in his face?

  • -Now, can we please see Mr. Van Helsing.

  • I've waited all night to bite some sense into him.

  • -What?

  • Quick, Dad.

  • -Aah!

  • -Aahh!

  • -Ugh!

  • Get off of me!

  • Ah!

  • Ugh!

  • Ugh!

  • Honestly, it's pathetic to be afraid of the dark at your age.

  • -Hi guys.

  • Bye guys.

  • -What, what?

  • -I thought you came here to support me.

  • But all the time you were planning

  • to bite Mr. Van Helsing.

  • -Vladimir, he insulted the family name.

  • -You don't care about us at all, do you?

  • -That is not true.

  • MRS. BRANAGH: Robin Branagh!

  • MR. BRANAGH: You can run, but you can't hide.

  • -Oh, great.

  • Guess who's spending all summer at Happy Camp?

  • -OK Dad.

  • Now's the time to prove you really care.

  • -Robin.

  • -A masterly move, Robin.

  • We must play a game some time.

  • Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Branagh.

  • What a pleasure to lose at chess to such a charming,

  • radiant young man.

  • -(WHISPERING) Happy.

  • -Hm? -(WHISPERING) Happy.

  • -Oh, happy.

  • Happy.

  • Happy young man.

  • -Really?

  • -And uh, what do you say about Happy Camp, Dad?

  • -Oh, it sounds like the cruelest, most

  • barbaric place on earth.

  • -Does it?

  • Oh dear, I don't want my Robin going anywhere barbaric.

  • -Maybe we can sort out his morbid fascination

  • some other way.

  • Come on sunshine.

  • -Quick, faster!

  • I tried to stop them, but they're a relentless mob!

  • -There he is!

  • -No pictures, no pictures!

  • Renfield, start the hearse!

  • -Still can't believe Dad only came to parent's evening

  • to get his revenge on Mr. Van Helsing.

  • -Stop winging.

  • At least he didn't find out he was a slayer.

  • -I suppose I've got to accept it.

  • Our family's just not normal.

  • -Who'd want to be normal?

  • I mean, look at him.

  • -Check mate!

  • Who's the loser, who's the loser,

  • go loser, go loser, go loser--

  • -Fair point.

  • [laughter]

  • [music playing]

[music playing]

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B1 中級 英國腔

年輕的德古拉 - BBC系列 - 第一季第7集 "生死攸關" (Young Dracula - BBC Series - Season 1 Ep 7 "A Matter of Life and Chess")

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    Jeng-Lan Lee 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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