What about Them Apples, or Them Apples?

他們的蘋果，還是他們的蘋果？

Warning if you like Them Apples—growing them costs $100 a year, plus a dollar for every tree you buy, 20 cents per tree in the fourth through tenth years you have them, and 30 cents per tree every year thereafter—assuming you're a commercial grower, otherwise you cannot plant Them Apples.

如果您喜歡他們的蘋果，請注意：種植他們的蘋果每年需要 100 美元，每買一棵樹需要 1 美元，在第四年到第十年，每棵樹需要 20 美分，之後每年每棵樹需要 30 美分--前提是您是商業種植者，否則您不能種植他們的蘋果。

Them Apples are evercrisps, which are what's known as a club apple—a variety whose growing, picking, packaging, and sales are meticulously managed by MAYA—no, MAYA, the Midwest Apple

這些蘋果是evercrisps，也就是所謂的俱樂部蘋果--其種植、採摘、包裝和銷售都由MAYA--不，是MAYA，中西部蘋果公司--精心管理。

Improvement Association.

改善協會。

Yep, this apple, as a grocery store product, has more in common with this abomination than this one.

沒錯，作為雜貨店的產品，這個蘋果和這個可惡的蘋果有更多的共同之處。

It might have even more in common with its distant second cousin.

它與其遠房的第二個表親可能有更多的共同之處。

Look at these apple products' websites side-by-side and you'll see a lot of the same stuff—trademarks, camel case, use of the word innovate.

把這些蘋果產品的網站並排起來看，你會發現很多相同的東西--商標、駱駝皮套、創新一詞的使用。

The big difference?

最大的區別是什麼？

This apple cranks out new models every year.

這個蘋果每年都會推出新機型。

The evercrisp, from crossbreeding to market, took 19 years.

Evercrisp 從雜交到上市，歷時 19 年。

But why all this hoopla?

但為什麼要大肆宣揚呢？

How did apples, unlike any of their neighbors in the produce aisle, become such a branded business?

與農產品貨架上的其他產品不同，蘋果是如何成為一個品牌企業的？

The answer, in a way, is that honeycrisps hit the scene and were so dang delicious that the entire business shifted around them.

答案可以說是，蜂蜜脆片一經推出就非常美味，以至於整個行業都圍繞著蜂蜜脆片發生了轉變。

But to understand exactly how that happened, we gotta head back to tree school.

不過，要想了解這一切到底是怎麼發生的，我們還得回到樹上學校。

Welcome to Tree School, where today's lesson comes to you via Dr. Susan Brown, the head of Cornell University's apple-breeding program, who was kind enough to respond to our emails.

歡迎來到 "樹木學校"，今天的課程由康奈爾大學蘋果育種項目負責人蘇珊-布朗博士為您帶來，她非常友好地回覆了我們的電子郵件。

Apples grow on trees—no, not like that.

蘋果長在樹上--不，不是那樣的。

Roughly none of the apples you've ever bought grew like that.

你買過的蘋果幾乎沒有一個是這樣長出來的。

Why?

為什麼？

Well, because delicious apple seeds may not make delicious apple trees for the same rough genetic reason that you're not an identical clone of your dad or your siblings.

嗯，因為美味的蘋果種子不一定能長成美味的蘋果樹，這和你不是你爸爸或你兄弟姐妹的完全複製人的遺傳原因是一樣的。

Instead, it'll make a tree with half the genes of your delicious apple, and half from whatever tree's pollen happened to flow by, and those genes may, or critically, may not, produce an apple that tastes anything like yours.

相反，它會讓一棵樹一半帶有你的美味蘋果的基因，一半帶有碰巧經過的任何一棵樹的花粉的基因，而這些基因可能會，或者關鍵的是，可能不會產生一個味道和你的蘋果一樣的蘋果。

Rather than take that chance, apple growers graft branches of proven trees onto rootstock in the ground, resulting in genetic clones of their best apples.

蘋果種植者不願冒這個險，而是將成熟果樹的枝條嫁接到地裡的砧木上，從而培育出基因克隆的最佳蘋果。

But what if you want better than your best?

但是，如果你想要比最好的更好呢？

You want crispier, sweeter, redder, bigger?

你想要更脆、更甜、更紅、更大？

Maybe you want it to ripen earlier in the season, or later?

您是想讓它在這個季節早一點成熟，還是晚一點成熟？

Maybe you want it more tolerant of cold or heat?

也許您希望它更耐寒或耐熱？

Maybe you want it more resistant to disease, or for its trees to produce more apples at a time?

也許您希望它的抗病能力更強，或者希望它的果樹一次能結出更多的蘋果？

To create a new variety, you hand-pollinate the flowers of one good tree with pollen from another, then bag the flower so no other pollen sneaks in.

要想創造一個新品種，就需要用一棵好樹的花朵與另一棵樹的花粉進行人工授粉，然後將花朵裝袋，這樣就不會有其他花粉溜進來了。

You collect the seeds that grow there, plant them in a nursery, then graft seedlings onto rootstock to grow a tree.

你要收集生長在那裡的種子，將它們種植在苗圃裡，然後將幼苗嫁接到砧木上，培育出一棵樹。

You'll make many, many thousands of trees out of this crossbreed, and in four or five years, you'll have apples to test.

你可以用這種雜交品種培育出成千上萬棵樹，四五年後，你就可以拿到蘋果進行試驗了。

You'll propagate the best of the best to make a new generation while terminating the rest, then rent and repeat this process for several more generations to weed out any that turn out to be susceptible to disease, or sunburn, or storing badly, or any other of a number of, quote, fatal flaws.

你要把最好的中的最好的繁殖出新的一代，同時淘汰其餘的，然後再租借和重複這個過程，再繁殖幾代，以淘汰那些容易生病、晒傷、儲藏不良或其他一些致命缺陷的品種。

Of tens of thousands of trees sampled over multiple decades, you might end up with one commercially viable apple.

在數十年間採樣的數萬棵蘋果樹中，最終可能只有一棵蘋果具有商業價值。

In 1960, in Minnesota, they did about 30 crossbreeds, including one that created a tree called MN1711, which struggled in the winter of 1976.

1960 年，他們在明尼蘇達州進行了約 30 次雜交，其中一次雜交培育出了一棵名為 MN1711 的樹，這棵樹在 1976 年的冬天陷入了困境。

Nevertheless, the UMN staff cloned it to try again.

儘管如此，UMN 工作人員還是克隆了它，再次嘗試。

By 1982, those clones hadn't impressed and were set for termination, but a horticulturalist named David Bedford gave them another shot because he felt they grew in bad conditions.

到了 1982 年，這些克隆人並沒有給人留下深刻印象，是以被終止，但一位名叫大衛-貝德福德（David Bedford）的園藝家認為它們的生長條件很差，是以又給了它們一次機會。

Under better ones, he discovered, they made pretty great apples.

他發現，在更好的條件下，它們能做出非常棒的蘋果。

Those apples, as we know them now, are Honeycrisps.

我們現在知道的這些蘋果就是蜜柑。

Honeycrisps were released in 1991, and really took off in 2007.

Honeycrisps 於 1991 年發佈，2007 年才真正興起。

What sets them apart is their large cells that literally burst when you bite into them, while lesser apples' smaller cells just cleave off.

蘋果的與眾不同之處在於它的大細胞，咬一口就會爆裂，而較小的蘋果細胞只會裂開。

It's the titular crisp.

它的名字叫 "清脆"。

The University of Minnesota got a US patent for the tree, and for as long as that patent exists in, they got $1.30 for every Honeycrisp tree sold, for a total of over $6 million brought in before the patent expired in 2008—not to mention a few million more in sales rights in other countries.

明尼蘇達大學為這種樹申請了美國專利，只要專利有效，每賣出一棵蜜柑樹，他們就能獲得 1.30 美元的收益，在 2008 年專利到期之前，他們總共獲得了 600 多萬美元的收益，更不用說在其他國家的幾百萬銷售權了。

Now, an important thing to know is that a Honeycrisp tree is a finicky creature.

現在，要知道的一件重要事情是，蜜柑樹是一種很挑剔的生物。

For starters, it's wood breaks easily, it needs hand thinning, it's susceptible to black rot and fire blight, and like many Minnesotans, it doesn't handle heat easily.

首先，它的木材容易斷裂，需要人工疏伐，容易感染黑腐病和火疫病，而且和許多明尼蘇達人一樣，它不容易耐熱。

Also, the apples have pointy stems and thin skin, so if you pick a bunch and throw them in a box, they'll poke holes in each other.

此外，蘋果的莖尖而皮薄，如果摘下一串扔進箱子裡，它們會互相戳出洞來。

All this makes growing Honeycrisps, well, pretty expensive.

所有這一切都使得種植蜜柑的成本相當高。

You need to buttress the tree, trim, treat for diseases, pray for good weather, and snip all those stems.

你需要加固樹幹、修剪、治療疾病、祈禱天氣晴好，並剪掉所有的莖。

UMN patented the Honeycrisp and got royalties off it, but it was what's called an open variety, meaning anyone could buy it and plant it and grow it and sell it however they want, which creates a branding problem.

UMN 為 Honeycrisp 申請了專利，並從中獲得了專利使用費，但這是一種所謂的開放品種，也就是說，任何人都可以購買它，種植它，想怎麼賣就怎麼賣，這就產生了一個品牌問題。

If you invented the Honeycrisp, and now some percentage of the apples being sold under that name are grown suboptimally, lack its signature texture, or taste like nothing, that's not great for your apple.

如果你發明了 Honeycrisp（蜜脆蘋果），而現在以這個名字銷售的蘋果中，有一定比例的蘋果種植不合理，缺乏其標誌性的口感，或者吃起來毫無味道，這對你的蘋果來說並不是好事。

In the wake of the Honeycrisp's success, many an apple breeder sought an apple as good as the Honeycrisp or better, a way to maintain that apple's consistency and keep making money off of it after the patent expired.

在 "蜜柑 "獲得成功之後，許多蘋果育種者都在尋找一種和 "蜜柑 "一樣好的蘋果，或者更好的蘋果，以保持這種蘋果的一致性，並在專利到期後繼續從中獲利。

Enter the Club Apple.

進入蘋果俱樂部

See, patents expire.

看，專利過期了。

Trademarks don't.

商標則不然。

If I cook up a variety called Half-as-Apple and throw down a patent and trademark, I don't just charge you a royalty for buying a tree, I can also charge a royalty for selling the apples under the name Half-as-Apple.

如果我發明了一個叫 "半邊蘋果 "的品種，並申請了專利和商標，我不僅可以向買蘋果樹的人收取專利費，還可以以 "半邊蘋果 "的名義向賣蘋果的人收取專利費。

And in order to let you buy the tree in the first place, I can require you pay into a

而且，為了讓你買下這棵樹，我可以要求你向一個

Half-as-Apple Growers Cooperative that ensures my standards of tree and apple care in exchange for the right to use the name.

半蘋果種植者合作社，確保我的果樹和蘋果護理標準，以換取使用該名稱的權利。

So many, many of the Honeycrisp 2.0s floating out there aren't just slightly tastier or more heat-resistant, they're managed with the intensity of a budding K-pop star to raise money and keep the brand steady for their breeders and growers.

是以，很多很多漂浮在市場上的 Honeycrisp 2.0 不僅僅是口感稍好或更耐熱，它們的管理力度就像一個嶄露頭角的 K-pop 明星，目的是為其育種者和種植者籌集資金並保持品牌的穩定。

Clubs also set new varieties up for success.

分會還為新品種的成功奠定了基礎。

We asked Dr. Brown whether she prefers her new varieties to hit the market as open or managed varieties, and she mentioned that a Club Apple centralized marketing budget does wonders to actually get it off the ground.

我們問布朗博士，她更喜歡將自己的新品種作為開放品種還是管理品種投放市場，她提到，蘋果俱樂部的集中營銷預算對新品種的真正落地有奇效。

Cornell's Snapdragon variety partnered with the Buffalo Bills, making them the only Apple-NFL partnership out there—at least until my deal with the Bengals go through.

康奈爾的 Snapdragon 綜藝節目與水牛城比爾隊合作，使他們成為蘋果公司與美國橄欖球聯盟的唯一合作伙伴--至少在我與孟加拉虎隊的交易通過之前是這樣。

She also said this was a great question, which means my writer gets to keep her healthcare this month.

她還說這是一個很好的問題，這意味著我的作家這個月可以繼續享受她的醫療保健服務。

Congrats, Amy!

恭喜你，艾米！

To celebrate, she headed out to support her local apple growers on My Dine.

為了慶祝，她參加了 "我的美食 "活動，支持當地的蘋果種植者。

This farm had plenty of open varieties, but over to the side, they had a cool kids table for club varieties.

這個農場有很多開放品種，但在一旁，他們還為俱樂部品種準備了一個很酷的兒童桌。

We've got the Evercrisp, the Snapdragon, the Rubyfrost, and the Ludacrisp.

我們有 Evercrisp、Snapdragon、Rubyfrost 和 Ludacrisp。

Like the Evercrisp, and Amy herself, Ludacrisp hails from the greater Columbus metro area towards the end of the 20th century.

與 Evercrisp 和艾米本人一樣，Ludacrisp 也來自 20 世紀末的大哥倫布市區。

It has the same subscription and royalty costs as Evercrisp.

它的訂閱和版稅成本與 Evercrisp 相同。

Both Rubyfrost and Snapdragon were bred at Cornell, and are now managed by Crunch Time

Rubyfrost 和 Snapdragon 都是康奈爾大學培育的，現在由 Crunch Time 管理。

Apple Growers, a New York State grower cooperative with exclusive rights to these two apple plants.

蘋果種植者是紐約州的一個種植者合作社，擁有這兩種蘋果的獨家種植權。

Growers pay a fee for every tree they purchase, every acre they plant, and every bushel they sell.

種植者每購買一棵樹，每種植一英畝，每出售一蒲式耳，都要支付一定的費用。

So to grow this table's worth of apples, the farm had to pay co-op fees to two different orgs in two different states, one of whom passed those fees on to Cornell University.

是以，為了種植這一桌的蘋果，農場不得不向兩個不同州的兩個不同組織支付合作費用，其中一個組織將這些費用轉嫁給康奈爾大學。

But the question remains, are they good?

但問題是，它們好嗎？

And, well, yeah.

是啊

The Evercrisp is like a perfect Honeycrisp, in a way.

從某種程度上說，Evercrisp 就像是完美的 Honeycrisp。

The Snapdragon was tangy and gave Amy the brute strength of a linebacker.

驍龍魚味道濃郁，給艾米帶來了後衛的蠻力。

Rubyfrost was a bit tougher, but good and good looking.

紅寶石霜的性格比較強悍，但人很好，長得也不錯。

Ludacrisp kinda tasted like a pineapple.

Ludacrisp 吃起來有點像菠蘿。

It's no wonder it takes decades to invent these.

這也難怪，發明這些東西需要幾十年的時間。

I just tried a half-as-apple, and I'm worried it's a cricket ball.

我剛吃了半個蘋果，擔心是個板球。

But while you're waiting for half-as-apple to drop, why not check out this video's sponsor, Nebula.

不過，在您等待半個蘋果降價的同時，不妨看看本視頻的贊助商星雲公司。

Nebula is a creator-owned streaming service home to many of your faves' ad-free videos, bonus content, early releases, and more.

星雲是一個由創作者擁有的流媒體服務，您可以在這裡看到您喜愛的許多無廣告視頻、獎勵內容、早期版本等。

It's also home to Nebula Originals, our slate of creator-led passion projects that are frankly too expensive and or risky to make for YouTube.

這裡也是 "星雲原創"（Nebula Originals）的發源地。"星雲原創 "是由創作者主導的激情項目，這些項目在 YouTube 上製作成本太高，風險太大。

Now, usually I would talk about the wide swath of originals from so many creators Nebula has on offer, but today I'm going to talk about me!

現在，我通常會談論星雲提供的眾多創作者的原創作品，但今天我要談談我自己！

The comedic minds behind this very channel have just premiered a Nebula-exclusive comedy debate show called Abolish Everything.

這個頻道背後的喜劇團隊剛剛首播了一檔星雲獨家喜劇辯論節目，名為《廢除一切》。

It's fun, it's dumb, it includes lines like this…

它很有趣，很蠢，包括這樣的臺詞...

The only way to stop a bad guy with a speakerphone is a good guy with a speakerphone.

唯一能阻止使用免提電話的壞人的方法就是使用免提電話的好人。

We're all really proud of it, and you can only see it on Nebula—which, by the way, is also the only place to get early Jetlag episodes and our Jetlag recap podcast, The

我們都為它感到自豪，只有在星雲上才能看到它--順便說一下，這裡也是獲得早期《時差》劇集和我們的《時差》回顧播客《時差》的唯一地方。

Layover, or our entirely separate game show, The Getaway.

或我們完全獨立的遊戲節目《逍遙遊》。

So what are you still doing here?

那你還在這裡做什麼？

Head to nebula.tv slash HAI for 40% off an annual subscription—just $36 for the year—and watch Abolish Everything right frickin' now!

前往 nebula.tv slash HAI，每年訂閱可享受 40% 的折扣--全年僅需 36 美元--現在就觀看《廢除一切》！