Name: Ozzy Man 評論：期望與現實 #2 (Ozzy Man Reviews: Expectations vs Reality #2)
Uploaded: 2025-01-02T13:47:46.000Z
Duration: 4 min 2 s

And we are back with more optimistic expectations Followed by crushing realities This bloke is making a cool slow-mo video in Bali He's gotta do a trick, yeah It looks good until it doesn't Jasper has decided the power of sight Has made basketball too easy So he's whacked on a blindfold Oh ho!

這個傢伙在巴厘島拍了一段很酷的慢動作視頻，他要變個戲法，是的，看起來很好，直到不好看為止 賈斯帕認為視覺的力量讓籃球變得太簡單了，所以他戴上了眼罩！

他像蝙蝠一樣使用生態定位了嗎？

Whenever I play basketball I end up like this wanker Yeah nah yeah with a ball mark on the face Cut to kiteboarding And whammy mid-strength beer retrieved You could set your Casio digital watch to this precision Although the problem with Paula Is that she gives us common people hope I take umbrage with that We see her perform magic and think I'll give it a go Defying gravity is a piece of piss Next thing you know you are on your arse You got wet sand and jagged seashells up your crack And your parachute has turned into a fucking SpaceX rocket I just wanted to fly amongst the pelicans you mutter Instead I'm stuck in this bog like a wounded mud crab He has to have a wedgie Surely Surely Oh massive wedgie He's gonna be on an operating table Having his undies surgically removed And thinking I never should have tried kiteboarding Hopefully he's got a receipt for his fancy new gear The missus will 110% be like I told ya You always do this You spend thousands of dollarydoos on a new hobby And end up with a debilitating wedgie And who's there to pick it Steve?

每當我打籃球時，我的下場就像這個傻逼 是啊是啊，臉上還帶著球印 切到風箏衝浪板上，砰的一聲，中杯啤酒被撈起你可以把你的卡西歐電子錶調到這麼精確 雖然寶拉的問題是她給了我們普通人希望 我對此不以為然 我們看到她變魔術，就想我也來試試 不受地心引力的影響簡直是小兒科但我卻像只受傷的泥蟹一樣被困在沼澤裡 他肯定有楔子 肯定有 哦，巨大的楔子 他會躺在手術檯上，被人動手術把內褲脫掉 然後想我真不該嘗試風箏衝浪 希望他有新裝備的收據

 Me Ok yeah nah he's done He's going home Big hoppy hop followed by a roly poly Wowee We all wanna tie our shoelaces like this guy We do Realistically This is most of us Our shoelaces are on fire Well we're oblivious Absolutely oblivious Look at this cheeky Adonis I wanna make it clear He climbed a ladder while doing 360s In ripped jeans Woah Now he's playing hacky sack Ho ho ho The ball is on his nose Fair dinkum He's like a seal Whenever us normal unenhanced individuals Do ladder tricks It goes like this Yeah We end up concussed Oh ziplining to the nearest supermarket Easy peasy We can all do that From one average bastard To me fanbase of average bastards I reckon we can all Oh no This is us isn't it We're both people simultaneously We're the bloke who is stuck And we're also the bloke who got stuck Trying to save the bloke Who is stuck Come on Be a hero Big push 3 2 1 Awwww Shit Cue the song that we're on a road to nowhere Or a zipline To nowhere Ah yes Harness the power of umbrella Give him a puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu Nah Fucked it This fella is practicing breakdancing In front of a decrepit building He keeps spinning and spinning He's like a perpetual fuckin' motion machine He could power a whole city He is a renewable source of clean energy Oh meanwhile this guy is like All of the greenhouse gases When you see something like Over the back putting wizardry in golf Naturally a mere mortal will want to do something similar Instead you fall on your ass And end up in a river Don't try that at home Or anywhere Overall we can dream And think we're like this slick cool Wedgie-less guy Who has no time to wait for an escalator To transport him to the bottom I descend on my terms But in reality we're all just this drunk bloke Walking in the wrong direction And that's okay Cause he'll get there In the end He'll get there

我們都想像這傢伙一樣繫鞋帶 我們確實這麼做了 現實中，我們大多數人的鞋帶都著火了 我們視而不見，絕對視而不見 看看這個厚臉皮的阿多尼斯，我想說清楚 他穿著破牛仔褲，一邊做360度旋轉一邊爬梯子 哇哦，現在他在玩黑客麻袋 吼吼，球在他鼻子上他就像個海豹 每當我們這些普通人在梯子上玩花樣的時候 就會這樣 是啊，我們最後會腦震盪 哦，拉鍊拉到最近的超市 小菜一碟，我們都能做到 從一個普通混蛋到我的普通混蛋粉絲團 我想我們都能做到 哦，不，這就是我們，不是嗎？我們也是被卡住的人 我們也是被卡住的人 我們也是被卡住

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Ozzy Man 評論：期望與現實 #2 (Ozzy Man Reviews: Expectations vs Reality #2)

stick

simultaneously

practice

average