What do you mean you're not coming back?

你不回來是什麼意思？

Yeah, Mom. I'm just really liking the vibe out here.

是的，媽媽我很喜歡這裡的氛圍

But what about college?

但大學呢？

Please. College is for sheeple who don't know how to take education into their own hands.

求你了大學是為那些不知道如何自己掌握教育的綿羊準備的。

Well...

嗯...

Jenny, please take your future more seriously.

珍妮，請認真對待你的未來。

I am. I'm happier here than I ever was in the States.

我就是這樣。我在這裡比在美國更快樂。

What? Messing around in Taiwan is your idea of being happy? I just don't get it.

什麼？在臺灣亂搞就是你認為的幸福？我真不明白。

Mom, not everyone wants to be a big-shot lawyer like you, who puts work over everything else, including their own daughter.

媽媽，不是每個人都想成為你這樣的大律師，把工作看得比什麼都重要，包括自己的女兒。

I worked so hard so you could have a good life.

我辛辛苦苦工作，就是為了讓你們過上好日子。

You want to live in Taiwan? Fine. You're an adult, but you're on your own.

你想住在臺灣？好啊你是成年人了，但你得靠自己。

Psh. Whatever. I can just keep saying it ought me, twins, until I figure out a plan.

Psh.隨便啦我可以一直說是我的錯，雙胞胎，直到我想出一個計劃。

I'm sure she won't mind.

我相信她不會介意的。

Sorry, Jenny. Ayi loves you, but one year is enough.

對不起，珍妮阿依很愛你，但一年就夠了

Also, Ayi doesn't want to keep on doing your laundry forever.

而且，阿怡也不想永遠幫你洗衣服。

All right, let's do the math.

好吧，我們來算一算。

My Mandarin learning mission here was supposed to last 12 months.

我在這裡的國語學習任務本應持續 12 個月。

Per redundancy, my mom gave me three months of extra stipend, which I figure I can stretch to five months with 24 Mart food, fasting, a lot of fasting, and no more yoga membership.

我媽媽給了我三個月的額外津貼，我想我可以用 24 馬特食物、禁食、大量禁食以及不再加入瑜伽會員的方式將津貼延長到五個月。

That means I'll be able to afford a monthly rent of...

這意味著我將能夠負擔每月...

6,000 NT. Oh, dang.

6,000 新臺幣。哦，該死。

Luckily, I'm a Gen Z-er.

幸運的是，我是 Z 世代。

Taiwan will come to fear my internet skills.

臺灣會害怕我的網絡技術的。

Uh, excuse me. Can I borrow your hotspot?

打擾一下我能借用一下你的熱點嗎？

Oh, nice. Even the dead have better housing than me.

哦，太好了連死人都比我住得好

So I guess that's it for the Jenny Show. It was fun while it lasted.

珍妮秀就到此為止吧。它很有趣，而它持續了。

Hey, Jenny. What are you doing?

嘿，珍妮你在幹什麼？

Hi, Uncle Kevin. Oh, I'm visiting a friend's house.

嗨，凱文叔叔我去朋友家做客了

Great view, but the food tastes like nothing.

景色不錯，但食物沒什麼味道。

Oh, ha ha ha. So are you still looking for a place to live?

哦，哈哈哈你還在找住的地方嗎？

Yeah, I am. Wait, how do you know that?

是的等等，你怎麼知道的？

Our family actually has an empty studio apartment in Shilin.

實際上，我們家在士林有一套空著的單間公寓。

Your mom told me to let you stay there.

你媽媽讓我讓你住在那裡。

Oh, my God, really? I guess my happiness does matter to her.

天啊，真的嗎？我想我的幸福對她來說真的很重要

But she told me to charge you 10,000 a month.

但她讓我每月收你一萬塊錢。

Wait, what? Okay, bye.

等等，什麼？好吧，再見

Uh, uh, 10,000 a month. I can manage that.

呃，呃，一個月一萬。我能搞定

Here's to my future in Taiwan.

為我在臺灣的未來乾杯

Ahem.

咳咳。

Hello.

你好