Welcome to Road Trip.

歡迎來到公路之旅。

Hi.

你好。

What's up?

怎麼了？

We've got to go gym in like 15 minutes.

我們還有15分鐘就要去健身房了。

The Bluetooth device.

藍牙設備

Oh.

哦。

Cue the alarm.

警報響起

Mikey, I can't see you.

米奇，我看不到你。

Wait, wait.

等等，等等

That's how you do it.

你就是這麼做的。

Guys.

夥計們

I just recorded something for...

我剛剛為...

You wouldn't have seen it by now.

你現在不會看到它了。

For an episode that's coming out in a couple of days.

幾天後就要播出的一集。

I had to put some stuff together.

我不得不把一些東西放在一起。

So, that's all done now.

所以，現在一切都搞定了。

We've not long got back from the gym.

我們剛從健身房回來不久。

Hi.

你好。

I'm vlogging the after this.

之後，我將錄製視頻。

If that makes sense.

如果有道理的話。

Makes sense, right?

有道理吧？

Clever.

真聰明

I ride using my laptop now to edit.

我現在用筆記本電腦進行編輯。

Whatever that was.

不管那是什麼。

What?

什麼？

It's not reading the passport.

這不是在讀護照。

Oh, no.

哦，不

I know.

我知道

It does that.

就是這樣。

You've got to keep trying.

你必須不斷嘗試。

Really?

真的嗎？

Let's have a tea.

喝杯茶吧

Let's have that tea.

喝茶吧

My tea.

我的茶

It is my tea.

這是我的茶。

It's a mighty tea.

這是一種很好的茶。

It's a mighty tea.

這是一種很好的茶。

It is a mighty tea.

這是一種很好的茶。

It's the part of me that wants to be on camera right now.

我現在就想上鏡頭。

I'm starving.

我餓死了

It's a harsh reality of RTTV and daily vlogs.

這是 RTTV 和日常視頻博客的殘酷現實。

You'll be on it all the time when you least expect it.

在你最意想不到的時候，你會一直在使用它。

One day this will be paparazzi.

總有一天，這也會成為狗仔隊。

Paparazzi of food.

美食狗仔隊

You've eaten.

你吃過了

You had three pita breads.

你有三個皮塔餅

I know.

我知道

I didn't like them.

我不喜歡他們。

You still ate.

你還是吃了

I did.

是的

Windsor.

溫莎

Windsor.

溫莎

Windsor.

溫莎

We've come into Windsor today because we were bored and we've got nothing to do.

我們今天來溫莎是因為無聊，沒事可做。

So, we were like, yeah, let's do it.

所以，我們就想，好，就這麼辦。

Should we meet you in Nando's?

我們在南多見？

Yeah.

是啊

Cool.

酷斃了

We're in Windsor.

我們在溫莎

We're probably going to go sweet shop now.

我們現在可能要去甜品店了。

Get some cheeky sweets, you know, down our little gobs.

吃點甜食，你知道的，把我們的小嘴塞進去。

Shut up, Rookie.

閉嘴，菜鳥

Don't litter.

不要亂扔垃圾

Littering's bad.

亂扔垃圾是不好的

No, I'm going to kick it up in the air and catch it in the net.

不，我要把它踢到空中，然後網住它。

Oh.

哦。

Goal!

目標

Odds of putting it back in your mouth.

把它放回嘴裡的機率。

Three, two, one, four.

三、二、一、四

Six.

六個

Oh, he's only going to do it.

哦，他只會這麼做。

Three, two, one.

三、二、一

Six.

六個

Oh.

哦。

We're in, I'm in the way.

我們進去了，我擋住了。

We're in Hardee's right now, the sweet shop in Windsor.

我們現在在哈迪餐廳，溫莎的甜品店。

And I've just found these.

我剛剛發現了這些。

Well, Jack found them.

傑克找到他們了

They're called Jolly Ranchers.

它們被稱為 "喬利蘭徹"。

Jolly Ranchers.

Jolly Ranchers.

They're Jack's favourite.

它們是傑克的最愛。

Ah, Mikey.

阿邁

Do you know what?

你知道嗎？

I feel well good.

我感覺很好。

Yeah, that was good.

是啊，很不錯。

I thought I was having a good hair day until I looked in here.

我以為我今天的髮型很好，直到我看了這裡。

And I'm like, wow.

我就想，哇

I look like God.

我看起來像上帝。

Uh, me old friend, the sergeant.

我的老朋友，那個中士

He's got a massive.

他有一個巨大的。

It looks like Mikey, but in a red suit.

它看起來像米奇，不過穿的是紅衣服。

Mikey and Jack have left me.

米奇和傑克離開了我

I don't know where they've gone.

我不知道他們去了哪裡。

I think they've run off somewhere.

我想他們已經跑得無影無蹤了。

I'm sort of stuck in Windsor at the moment.

我現在有點困在溫莎。

We're going out.

我們要出去

Going to get some Nando's.

去吃點南多士。

Probably look at the castle for a little bit.

可能會在城堡裡看一會兒。

One main question I want to ask.

我想問一個主要問題。

You know when it gets cold, how, what changes the weather?

你知道天冷的時候，天氣會發生什麼變化嗎？

I'm going to go find Mikey and Jack.

我去找米奇和傑克

What's going on?

怎麼了？

We're in the fudge shop again.

我們又來到了軟糖店。

Always, always.

永遠，永遠

Look where you went, boys.

看看你們去了哪裡，孩子們？

This is the fudge man who makes all the fudge in Windsor.

他就是製作溫莎所有軟糖的人。

I got a pan on his head.

我在他頭上放了一個平底鍋。

Shout out to Matt.

向馬特致敬

You know this because you've got fans.

你知道這一點是因為你有粉絲。

Yeah.

是啊

I don't really have fans so much as I have spectators.

與其說我有粉絲，不如說我有觀眾。

We're your fans.

我們是你的粉絲

We're your fans.

我們是你的粉絲

You're obviously quite polite.

你顯然很有禮貌。

People are always trying to lick stuff.

人們總是想舔東西。

You'll get this.

你會得到這個。

Your fans will try and lick you.

你的粉絲會試圖舔你

If you can, try and lick these guys.

如果可以的話，試著舔舔這些傢伙。

They'll appreciate that.

他們會很感激的。

Otherwise, they'll have to wear these t-shirts.

否則，他們就只能穿這些 T 恤衫了。

They will.

他們將

Lick or stroke the road trip.

舔一舔或捋一捋公路旅行。

Yeah, there you go.

對，就是這樣。

Stroke the road trip.

撫摸路途。

He tries to lick us on a regular basis.

它經常試圖舔我們。

He does.

他是這麼說的。

You try and lick us all the time.

你總是想舔我們。

Matt, calm down.

馬特，冷靜下來。

Sweetest fudge.

最甜的軟糖

You cheeky man.

你這個厚臉皮的傢伙

Yep.

是的。

The hair's still shit.

頭髮還是一團糟

We came back from Windsor and we noticed that there's some bags here.

我們從溫莎回來，發現這裡有一些袋子。

Harvey's home.

哈維的家

Harvey went away for a few days for his birthday.

哈維去外地過了幾天生日。

He's gone somewhere with Blair.

他和布萊爾去了某個地方

And when he comes back, we've got a little surprise for him.

當他回來時，我們會給他一個小驚喜。

Problem is, because we organised a surprise for his birthday and it's three days on, his surprise is going to be stale.

問題是，因為我們為他的生日準備了一個驚喜，而現在才過了三天，他的驚喜就要變味了。

So what we're thinking is when we give him the cake, do we punch it?

所以我們想的是，當我們把蛋糕給他的時候，我們要打他嗎？

Yes.

是的。

I think so too.

我也這麼認為。

Brooke's not sure because Brooke thinks it'll go on the floor, but I personally think that's even funnier.

布魯克不確定，因為布魯克認為它會掉到地板上，但我個人認為這更有趣。

If one more person votes towards the cake being punched, Brooke will be on our team.

如果再有一個人投票支持蛋糕被打，布魯克就會加入我們的隊伍。

What do you think, Mikey, on the matter?

米奇，你怎麼看這件事？

He's ignoring me because he's pretending not to listen.

他不理我是因為他假裝沒在聽。

Sorry, Mikey, I genuinely didn't hear.

對不起，米奇，我真的沒聽見。

You look really good.

你看起來真不錯。

Genuinely, from this angle, it's probably the best you've ever looked on Arty TV.

說真的，從這個角度看，這可能是你在 Arty TV 上看到的最好的畫面了。

Shut up.

閉嘴

You look really good.

你看起來真不錯。

I'm not buying it.

我不信。

Whatever you're doing, keep doing that thing you do.

不管你在做什麼，繼續做你該做的事。

We're thinking when Harve gets here and we give him his cake, because it's pretty much stale already, do we punch it as we give it him?

我們在想，等哈維來了，我們把蛋糕給他時，因為蛋糕已經變質了，我們要不要在給他蛋糕時打一拳？

No.

不

Why?

為什麼？

Because we paid a lot of money for that cake.

因為我們為那個蛋糕花了很多錢。

I know we did, but that was just...

我知道我們做過，但那只是......

I'm not willing to beat it up.

我不願意打它。

No, no, no, just one quick dab.

不，不，不，只是輕輕一抹。

One quick punch, just dab.

快速出拳，只需輕輕一點。

Depends who's punching it.

那要看是誰打的拳了。

If you're punching it, then you're sure.

如果你打了一拳，那你就確定了。

Because you feel like I'll get in trouble for it.

因為你覺得我會是以惹上麻煩。

No, because I feel like it would do no damage.

不，因為我覺得這不會造成任何傷害。

Why are you being nasty?

你為什麼這麼討厭？

Mikey's turned solid. 2017 is the year of the coin ban.

米奇變得穩重了2017 年是硬幣禁令之年。

I am hard.

我很堅強。

No, we're not going to punch it.

不，我們不會打它。

I have good news, though, for the roadies watching.

不過，我有一個好消息要告訴正在觀看的路人。

The Christmas video of our time at home is done.

我們在家過聖誕節的視頻已經完成。

Yay!

耶

It's only taken...

只花了...

A month.

一個月

A month.

一個月

Basically, me and Mikey get procrastinating about it, like, we'll do it tomorrow, we'll do it tomorrow.

基本上，我和米奇總是拖拖拉拉，好像明天再做，明天再做。

I'm really looking forward to this, because you guys will have put some hefty hours in on this one.

我真的很期待，因為你們一定花了很多時間在這上面。

Can't wait for Harvey to come home.

等不及哈維回家了。

Jack's buzzin', aren't you, Jack?

傑克嗡嗡作響，是嗎，傑克？

Mikey's mad.

米奇瘋了

I'm not mad.

我沒有生氣。

Hashtag Mike Mikey.

Hashtag Mike Mikey.

What?

什麼？

I'm just taking control.

我只是在控制。

Ooh, how many roadies want to hear you say that, hey?

有多少路人想聽你這麼說？

The battery's on 69% on the camera.

相機的電池電量為 69%。

Oh, my Lord.

哦，上帝啊

I had ham today, as well.

我今天也吃了火腿。

It's really going to hurt.

這真的會很疼。

You had ham today?

你今天吃了火腿？

I had ham earlier.

我之前吃過火腿。

Wow, I wanted to get ham.

哇，我想吃火腿。

Listen to the can of pop.

聽聽這罐流行音樂。

Please insert an explosion, yes!

請插入爆炸，是的！

Peace and love.

和平與愛

Flipside, all that shebang.

翻轉，所有的一切。

I'm literally trying to do an outro, and you're just talking over it.

我正試著做個結束語，你卻在上面滔滔不絕。

You're so blonde.

你真是金髮碧眼。

Blair and Harvey are back from wherever they've gone.

布萊爾和哈維從他們去的地方回來了。

Harvey has no idea that we bought him a birthday cake.

哈維不知道我們給他買了生日蛋糕。

The best custom cake we could find around the area.

這是我們在附近能找到的最好的定製蛋糕。

I have talc on my face, hence why I look like a vampire.

我臉上有滑石粉，所以看起來像吸血鬼。

I want to be Damien.

我想成為達米安

You do, from The Vampire.

是的，來自《吸血鬼》。

Diaries, there you go.

日記，給你。

Yeah, it's an Oreo customised cake, and it is...

是的，這是一個奧利奧定製蛋糕，它...

Hang on.

堅持住

Wicked!

邪惡

So, it's really late now.

所以，現在真的很晚了。

Everyone's asleep.

大家都睡了

We found out earlier from Blair that we've nearly sold out some of the shows, especially the London show, already in one night for the next tour, which is insane news.

我們早些時候從布萊爾那裡得知，我們下一次巡演的一些演出，尤其是倫敦的演出，幾乎在一個晚上就已售罄，這真是個瘋狂的消息。

It makes us all so happy.

這讓我們都非常高興。

It's so cool that you guys are coming to see us live.

你們能來看我們的現場演出，真是太棒了。

Thank you if you've got a ticket already.

如果您已經買到了票，那就謝謝您了。

If you haven't, go get some, or you're going to miss out on a good time.

如果你還沒有，那就去買一些吧，否則你將錯過一段美好時光。

Hang on.

堅持住

Wicked!

邪惡