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I was born in Hong Kong.
我出生在香港。
Any Hong Kong people?
有香港人嗎?
Couple of us? Awesome, man.
我們幾個?太棒了
For you guys that haven't been following the news, Hong Kong is a part of Japan.
對於沒有關注新聞的人來說,香港是日本的一部分。
I'm joking, obviously.
顯然,我是在開玩笑。
But I said the same shit in Kansas City, and people were like, really?
但我在堪薩斯城也說了同樣的話,人們都說,真的嗎?
Wow.
哇
We learned something new today, Bill.
我們今天學到了新東西,比爾。
I did a show in Kansas City, I don't know why either.
我在堪薩斯城做過一場演出,我也不知道為什麼。
People are very nice in Kansas City.
堪薩斯城的人都很友善。
I'm not gonna say they're racist or anything like that, but they're just curious.
我不會說他們是種族主義者或類似的東西,但他們只是好奇。
They're watching me like they're watching an episode of National Geographic.
他們看著我,就像在看一集《國家地理雜誌》。
And a pack of giraffes just ran by.
一群長頸鹿剛剛跑過。
And they're like, oh, never seen one of those in real life.
他們會說,哦,在現實生活中從沒見過這種東西。
Looks majestic.
看起來氣勢磅礴。
This one kid in Kansas City came up to me after the show.
演出結束後,堪薩斯城的一個孩子來找我。
Very nice kid. This is what he said.
很不錯的孩子。他是這麼說的
He was like, Jimmy, thought you were really funny, man.
他說,吉米,我覺得你很有趣。
I don't mean to offend you.
我無意冒犯。
That's when you know you're about to get offended.
這時候你就知道自己要被冒犯了。
He's like, I don't mean to offend you, but when I first saw your poster,
他說 我無意冒犯 但我第一次看到你的海報時
I thought you were gonna play the violin.
我還以為你要拉小提琴呢
I was like, I do, motherfucker, just not right now.
我就說,我願意,混蛋,只是現在不行。
Shit.
媽的
Keep it a secret.
保守祕密
See, I gotta say,
我得說
I got some of the nicest crowds in the business.
我有一些生意場上最棒的觀眾。
I rarely ever get heckled. And one time I was talking about how I used to play the violin.
我很少被人嘲笑。有一次,我說起自己以前是如何拉小提琴的。
Old Chinese lady sitting in the front just stood up and screamed out, first chair or second chair?
坐在前面的中國老太太站起來大聲喊道:第一把交椅還是第二把交椅?
And I was like, thanks, ma'am. Fifth chair, actually.
我就說,謝謝,女士。其實是第五把交椅
Fifth chair. It wasn't very good.
第五把交椅不是很好
It wasn't good.
不是很好
I grew up very stereotypically in Hong Kong. I grew up very stereotypically in Hong Kong.
我在香港非常刻板地長大。我在香港非常刻板地長大。
Like, my real name is not even Jimmy.
比如,我的真名甚至不是吉米。
That's my English name.
這是我的英文名字。
My real name is Man Xing. In Cantonese,
我的真名叫文興。廣東話、
Man Xing. It stands for 10,000 success. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
萬興。代表一萬個成功對,對,對,對
I have very ambitious parents. And now
我有一對雄心勃勃的父母。現在
I'm telling dick jokes and doing tai chi on stage.
我在臺上講雞巴笑話,打太極拳。
Jimmy was just kind of like an arbitrary English name that just sounded easy. And my dad, he named himself Richard.
吉米只是一個聽起來很簡單的英文名字。我爸爸給自己取名理查德。
I was like, Dad, why'd you name yourself Richard?
我當時想,爸爸,你為什麼給自己取名理查德?
He was like, because I want to be rich.
他說,因為我想發財。
It makes so much sense.
這太有道理了。
And then they named my older brother
然後他們給我哥哥起了個名字
Roger after the James Bond actor Roger Moore.
羅傑(Roger)取自詹姆斯-邦德的扮演者羅傑-摩爾(Roger Moore)。
Yeah, but my brother hated that name.
是的,但我哥哥討厭這個名字。
He was like, man, it makes me sound like an old white guy. So eventually he changed his own name to Roy.
他想,夥計,這讓我聽起來像個老白人。所以最後他把自己的名字改成了羅伊。
So now he sounds like an older white guy.
所以,現在他聽起來像個上了年紀的白人。
And now his full name is Roy Roger, which is the oldest white guy to ever white.
現在他的全名是羅伊-羅傑,是有史以來最老的白人。
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