Name: 【看脫口秀學英文】當英文是你的第一和第二語言時 (When English Is Your First And Second Language. Vien Phommachanh)
Uploaded: 2024-07-17T21:01:20.000Z
Duration: 8 min 49 s

I had to take English as a second language classes.

我必須得上英語作為第二語言的課程。

情態副詞

I struggled in these classes because I only spoke English.

因為我只會說英語，所以我在這些課程上很吃力。

I went to a school with a bunch of immigrant kids.

The teachers are like, "What do we do with the Asian kid who speaks English?"

老師們都在想，我們該拿這個會說英語的亞洲孩子怎麼辦？

Yeah, they decided let's just put him with the others.

是的，他們決定把他和其他人放在一起。

So English is now my first and second language.

英語現在是我的第一和第二語言。

If you speak English, that class is really easy.

如果你會說英語，這門課就非常簡單。

我的父母把我們養育成美國人。

I don't even like going to Asian restaurants.

My wife took me to this Vietnamese restaurant.

我妻子帶我去看了這個越南餐廳

We sit down, the Vietnamese guy comes by.

我們坐下後，那個越南人走了過來。

我就想，嘿，能給我一杯可樂嗎？

He was so rude because he didn't work there.

他很粗魯，因為他不是那裡的員工。

This happens to every Asian person in an Asian restaurant.

在亞洲餐廳裡，每個亞洲人都會遇到這種情況。

He's like, "Why don't you get me a Coke?"

他說，為什麼不給我來杯可樂呢？

It became this really weird scene, like two Asian guys yelling at each other like in a Vietnamese restaurant.

這就變成了一個非常奇怪的場景，就像兩個亞洲人在越南餐館裡大喊大叫一樣。

It was like a weird, racist, friendly fire standoff.

這就像是一場奇怪的、種族主義的友軍對峙。

Everybody in the restaurant is looking at us now.

餐廳裡的每個人都在看著我們。

I heard someone go, "Why are the waiters arguing?"

我聽到有人說，服務員為什麼在爭吵？

They're always like, "How did your parents deal with 10 kids?"

他們總是問，你的父母是如何照顧 10 個孩子的？

Laotians deal with 10 kids the same way you guys deal with two.

寮國人對付 10 個孩子的方法和你們對付 2 個孩子的方法一樣。

They defend and rebound and two kids never come off the bench.

他們的防守和籃板能力都很強，有兩個孩子從來沒有下過板凳。

They're afraid you're going to trade them to another team.

他們害怕你把他們交易到其他球隊。

So it's unusual that I'm doing comedy because I'm a doctor.

因為我是醫生，所以我演喜劇是不尋常的。

這也很不尋常，因為我是寮國人。

Culturally, we're just very serious people.

在文化上，我們是非常嚴肅的人。

They think I'm running away with a circus.

I was like, "It'll be a good time. We'll make them laugh. It'll be awesome."

我想，這會是一段美好時光。我們會逗他們笑的。 會很棒的

Yeah, they didn't laugh once and they made everybody uncomfortable.

是啊，他們一次都沒笑過，讓每個人都很不舒服。

I made it this big deal at the beginning of my set.

我在演出一開始就把它當成一件大事。

I told the audience, "My family's here, woo."

我告訴觀眾，我的家人在這裡，嗚嗚。

And then every time I told a joke, instead of laughing at the joke, the entire audience looked at my family.

然後，每次我講笑話時，全場觀眾不但不笑，反而看著我的家人。

My parents stayed up there the whole time like this.

By the end of the show, the entire audience was on their side.

演出結束時，所有觀眾都站在了他們這一邊。

我在轟炸，我在沉默，蟋蟀在叫。

The only time the audience laughed was when my dad goes, "You're not funny."

唯一一次觀眾大笑是我爸爸說 "你一點都不好笑 "的時候。

I want you guys to find me on social media.

我希望你們能在社交媒體上找到我。

我的 Instagram 粉絲數已達 12 人。

我的名字有 20 個字母長，好嗎？

我必須更改一個網站的登錄名。

I accidentally put my name in that new password box.

我不小心把自己的名字寫在了新密碼框裡。

I tried my last name and it said too strong.

我試過我的姓氏，但它說太強烈了。

So my name kind of stinks when you're a doctor, all right?

當你是醫生時，我的名字就有點臭了，好嗎？

Every day I meet a patient whose name is something like Bob.

每天我都會遇到一個病人，他的名字和鮑勃差不多。

It's a different guy every day, but it's the same guy.

每天都是不同的人，但都是同一個人。

He has to tell me he's been to Korea, which is cool because culturally, geographically, they're not even close.

他必須告訴我他去過韓國，這很酷，因為在文化和地理上，他們甚至都不接近。

He thinks it's gonna mean like he who fights bear.

他認為這就像他和熊打架一樣。

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【看脫口秀學英文】當英文是你的第一和第二語言時 (When English Is Your First And Second Language. Vien Phommachanh)

awkward

weird

entire

struggle