What did you do?

你做了什麼？

Good news.

好消息

I found out what part was making that noise.

我發現是哪個部件發出的噪音。

You have to put this back together.

你必須把它裝回去。

Now we're going to the bad news.

現在我們來說壞消息。

What made you think you could fix this?

是什麼讓你覺得你能解決這個問題？

I'm smart.

我很聰明。

And I had a book.

我還有一本書。

Do you still think you're smart?

你還覺得自己聰明嗎？

Yes. Hello, Pete.

你好 皮特

My name is Sheldon Cooper, and I would like to know what changed in your white sandwich loaf to make it taste different.

我的名字叫謝爾頓-庫珀，我想知道你做的白夾心麵包是怎麼變味的。

Sheldon, you're a genius.

Sheldon 你真是個天才

Sheldon, hang up the phone.

Sheldon 掛掉電話

It's dinner time.

晚餐時間到了

Be right there, Mom.

馬上就來，媽媽

I'm doing battle with corporate America.

我正在與美國公司作戰。

I'm sorry, Pete.

對不起，皮特

You were saying?

你剛才說什麼？

Any chance your bread was past the expiration date?

你的麵包會不會過期了？

No.

不

It was brand new, but I did a taste comparison after it was bought out by the Domestic Food Corporation, and they are definitely not the same.

它是全新的，但在被國內食品公司收購後，我做了一次口味對比，它們絕對不一樣。

Well, I can assure you that the recent acquisition by the Domestic Food Corporation has not affected the quality of our products in any way.

我可以向你們保證，最近國內食品公司的收購絲毫沒有影響我們的產品質量。

Every single bread, baked good, and pastry is made with love, from our hearth to your home.

每一款麵包、烘焙食品和糕點都是用愛製作的，從我們的爐灶到您的家中。

Then why does it taste different, Pete?

那為什麼味道不一樣呢，皮特？

Why?

為什麼？

Well, because now we make everything really cheap and fast.

嗯，因為現在我們做什麼都很便宜，速度也很快。

Bye. You'll be amazed to know that the Nobel Prize, while being the most prestigious award in science, is not generally celebrated in this country.

再見。 你一定會驚訝地發現，諾貝爾獎雖然是科學界最負盛名的獎項，但在這個國家卻並不普遍。

No parades, no fireworks, which is why I thought having a breakfast celebration was not only appropriate, but long overdue.

沒有遊行，沒有焰火，所以我認為舉行早餐慶祝活動不僅合適，而且早該舉行了。

You may have noticed that I went with Cheerios, and believe me, it was a decision that I came to after careful consideration.

你可能已經注意到，我選擇了 Cheerios，相信我，這是我經過深思熟慮後做出的決定。

There were birds on the Froot Loops, Cocoa Puffs, and Corn Flakes, so they were out.

Froot Loops、Cocoa Puffs 和 Corn Flakes 上都有鳥，所以它們被淘汰了。

And leprechauns and elves are magical creatures that would be a slap in the face to the scientific community.

而妖精和精靈都是神奇的生物，這對科學界來說無疑是一記響亮的耳光。

Anyway, the festivities begin at 4.30 a.m.

總之，慶祝活動將於凌晨 4 時 30 分開始。

You're most welcome to come, as are you, unhappy bad boy. All right, 34 A and B, this is us.

歡迎你來，你也是，不開心的壞小子 好了，34A和34B，我們到了

You want the aisle or the window?

你要過道還是窗口？

Which one is assigned to me?

哪個分配給我？

It doesn't matter, just pick one.

無所謂，選一個就好。

Well, if I sit by the window, I can watch the takeoff and landing.

如果我坐在窗邊，就能看到飛機的起飛和降落。

But if I sit on the aisle, I'm closer to the bathroom.

但如果我坐在過道上，離衛生間就更近了。

Here we go.

開始了

Although if I'm by the window, you'll have to get up when I use the bathroom.

不過，如果我在窗邊，我上廁所時你就得起來了。

But if I'm not, I'll have to get up when you use the bathroom.

但如果我不起來，你上廁所時我就得起來。

Just pick one.

隨便選一個。

It's a tricky decision.

這是一個棘手的決定。

My bladder is smaller than yours.

我的膀胱比你的小。

Everything okay here?

這裡還好嗎？

About to be.

即將成為

Whoa!

哇哦

Aisle it is.

是過道。

We're good. Hello, I'm Sheldon Cooper, and this is why Sheldon Cooper should go to college.

我們很好 We're good. 你好 我是謝爾頓・庫珀 這就是謝爾頓・庫珀應該上大學的原因 Hello, I'm Sheldon Cooper, and this is why Sheldon Cooper should go to college.

I realize attending college in another state or country is unrealistic at this time, which is why I'm proposing that I live at home but enroll full-time to continue my studies with Dr. Sturgis at East Texas Tech.

我意識到在另一個州或國家上大學目前是不現實的，這就是為什麼我建議我住在家裡，但全日制入學，繼續在東德克薩斯理工大學跟隨斯特吉斯博士學習。

I firmly believe that I'm ready for this next step in my academic life.

我堅信，我已經準備好在我的學習生涯中邁出下一步。

But don't just take it from me.

不過，別光聽我說。

He's ready.

他準備好了

In the fall, now, just let him go.

秋天，現在，就讓他去吧。

Please.

請。

I don't think I have anything left to teach, Sheldon.

我覺得我沒什麼可教的了 Sheldon

I'm pretty sure he's already smarter than me.

我敢肯定他已經比我聰明瞭。

It's true.

這是真的。

Sheldon Cooper, ready for college, ready to change the world.

謝爾頓-庫珀，準備上大學，準備改變世界。

Cut.

切。

If that doesn't convince her, I don't know what her problem is.

如果這還不能說服她，我就不知道她有什麼問題了。

I'm afraid we have a bigger problem.

恐怕我們有一個更大的問題。

What are you talking about?

你在說什麼？

I'm a scientist, and I have to follow the data wherever it leads, whether I like it or not.

我是一名科學家，無論我喜歡與否，我都必須跟著數據走。

Get to the point.

直奔主題。

It seems I have a crush on you.

看來我喜歡上你了

What?

什麼？

I'm as surprised as you are, but I have all the symptoms according to both Dr. Sturgis and the editors of Sassy Magazine.

我和你們一樣感到驚訝，但根據斯特吉斯醫生和《時髦》雜誌編輯的說法，我有所有的症狀。

Sheldon, I'm really glad that you told me this, because the truth is I feel the same way about you.

Sheldon 我真的很高興你告訴我這些 因為事實上 我對你也有同樣的感覺

You do?

是嗎？

I mean, I've been trying to hide it, but now I don't have to anymore.

我的意思是，我一直在試圖隱瞞，但現在我不必再隱瞞了。

This is such a relief.

這讓我鬆了一口氣。

Oh dear, this is new information.

天哪，這可是新消息。

I've been operating under the assumption that my crush was unrequited.

我一直以為我的暗戀是單相思。

Oh, it's requited, Sheldon.

這是被徵召的 Sheldon

It's very requited.

這是非常需要的。

Hmm.

嗯

What are you doing?

你在幹什麼？

We have a crush on each other, so now we have to kiss.

我們對彼此都有好感，所以現在我們必須接吻。

We do? Hello.

有嗎？ 你好。

I'm not very comfortable speaking in front of crowds, but there's a technique to reduce stage fright by focusing on one person in the audience and delivering your speech just to them.

我不太喜歡在眾人面前演講，但有一種技巧可以減少怯場，那就是把注意力集中在觀眾中的一個人身上，只對他一個人演講。

That's what I'll be doing today.

這就是我今天要做的。

If it weren't for this person, I wouldn't be here right now.

如果不是這個人，我現在也不會在這裡。

They've taught me a lot, and it's by their example that I've found the courage to move forward into this new and exciting chapter of my life.

他們教會了我很多，正是有了他們的榜樣，我才鼓起勇氣，邁向我人生中激動人心的新篇章。

Missy, this is for you.

大小姐，這是給你的。

Change can be scary, but I know we're going to be fine.

變化是可怕的，但我知道我們會沒事的。

Because like you said, it's OK to be scared.

因為就像你說的，害怕也沒關係。

We just have to do it anyway.

無論如何，我們必須這麼做。

So if any of my fellow graduates are nervous about the future, know that you're not alone.

是以，如果我的畢業生朋友們對未來感到緊張，請知道你們並不孤單。

I suggest you all try to be as brave as my twin sister.

我建議你們都像我的雙胞胎妹妹一樣勇敢。

That's my plan.

這就是我的計劃。

Missy, I wish I could give you advice about middle school, but I was so smart I skipped it.

大小姐，我希望我能給你一些關於中學的建議，但我太聰明瞭，我跳過了中學。

If you make it to high school, we'll talk.

如果你能上高中，我們再談。

Thank you.

謝謝。

APPLAUSE

鼓掌