Thank you for joining us here in Los Angeles, California, where I don't know about you, but we are still buzzing from, well, from the recreational cannabis and also from the verdict that was handed down so bigly and beautifully in New York City yesterday.

感謝您來到加利福尼亞州洛杉磯，我不知道您在哪裡，但我們仍在為娛樂性大麻以及昨天在紐約市做出的重大而漂亮的判決而興奮不已。

One time, Commander-in-Thief scored the most guilty verdicts of any president ever.

有一次，總司令獲得了有史以來最多的有罪判決。

He went 34-0, topping the 1971-72 Lakers, who won 33 in a row.

他取得了 34 勝 0 負的戰績，超過了 1971-72 年的湖人隊，後者取得了 33 連勝。

And Trump did it without Will Chamberlain or Jerry Retz.

而且，特朗普是在沒有威爾-張伯倫或傑瑞-雷茨的情況下做到這一點的。

He did it all by himself.

他都是一個人完成的。

It was a day that will be written about in history books at, for those of you watching in Florida, history books are things you used to have at your schools before Ron DeSantis was governor.

這一天將被載入史冊，對於佛羅里達州的觀眾來說，在羅恩-德桑蒂斯（Ron DeSantis）擔任州長之前，歷史書就是你們學校裡的東西。

The victory was, or the verdict, was unanimous on all charges.

在所有指控上，勝利或者說判決是一致的。

Each juror received a thank you from the judge and Hickory Farms gift basket mysteriously signed Melania T.

每位陪審員都收到了法官的感謝信和山核桃農場禮品籃，上面神祕地簽著梅拉尼婭-T。

Melania was not in court when the verdict was read, but she released a strong statement today, posting about how much she loves and supports her husband, no matter what the outcome of the trial was.

宣讀判決時，梅拉尼婭並不在法庭上，但她今天發表了一份強有力的聲明，表示無論審判結果如何，她都深愛並支持自己的丈夫。

I'm kidding, she didn't say anything.

我開玩笑的，她什麼都沒說。

She said nothing at all.

她什麼也沒說。

She was nowhere to be found.

她不知去向。

She was probably online buying a new summer hat.

她可能在網上買了一頂新的夏帽。

I don't know.

我不知道。

There are still three other cases against Trump, each one for more serious crimes.

目前還有另外三起針對特朗普的案件，每起案件都涉及更嚴重的罪行。

This is like the lowest hanging mushroom of the group.

這就好比是最低級的蘑菇。

And it does feel a little bit unsatisfying, given the scope of how many brazenly illegal things this man has done, that they would start by getting him for this.

考慮到這個人做過那麼多明目張膽的非法勾當，他們一開始就以這個罪名抓他，確實讓人覺得有點不滿意。

This is like if OJ had been convicted for speeding.

這就好比 OJ 因超速而被定罪。

Like, do you know how fast you're going in that Bronco, sir?

比如，你知道你開那輛野馬有多快嗎，先生？

You know, it's funny how things work in the upside down world we live in.

你知道嗎，在我們生活的這個顛倒的世界裡，事情的發展真是有趣。

Everything to them is a win.

對他們來說，一切都是勝利。

Every one of these Trumpers now wants to play this like it's a good thing, like it's great news that their candidate for president was convicted of 34 felonies.

特朗普的每一個支持者現在都想把這件事說成是件好事，好像他們的總統候選人被判犯有 34 項重罪是個好消息。

The tributes to Maga Teresa were flowing from great minds like this gentleman, who proclaimed today was our George Floyd moment.

向馬加-特蕾莎致敬的偉人絡繹不絕，比如這位先生，他宣稱今天是我們的喬治-弗洛伊德時刻。

I don't know, is that good?

我不知道，這樣好嗎？

And at one point, put that back up, at one point into asking AI to generate an image of Donald

有一次，我把它放回去，讓人工智能生成唐納德的影像。

Trump in cornrows, do you say to yourself,

梳著玉米辮的特朗普，你會不會對自己說、

I should probably get back to work.

我也許該回去工作了。

Here's another one from Trump's longtime advisor and fellow felon, Roger Stone.

這是特朗普的長期顧問、重罪犯羅傑-斯通（Roger Stone）的另一篇文章。

The only thing Trump is guilty of is being the greatest president since Abraham Lincoln.

特朗普唯一的罪過就是成為亞伯拉罕-林肯以來最偉大的總統。

Oh, and 34 felonies on top of that.

哦，還有 34 項重罪。

But not every Trump fan was looking for a fight.

但並不是每個特朗普的粉絲都在找茬。

Some, like this guy outside a court in New York, expressed hope that we can come together to get past this.

有些人，比如紐約一家法院外的這個人，表示希望我們能團結起來，度過難關。

Not guilty.

無罪。

I hope the country doesn't burn down.

我希望國家不會被燒燬。

Not guilty.

無罪。

I hope that we can find a way to love each other and to make right this fucking, this prostitution.

我希望我們能找到相愛的方式，並糾正這種性交和賣淫行為。

Go fuck yourself and your mother.

去你媽的吧

Well, that didn't last long.

不過，好景不長。

But in New York, that's an affectionate term.

但在紐約，這是一個親切的稱呼。

And then we have our leaders in the GOP, who could not care less about Americans and how important it is that we have faith in our legal system.

還有我們的共和黨領導人，他們根本不關心美國人，也不關心我們對法律制度的信任有多麼重要。

They know Trump is guilty.

他們知道特朗普有罪。

They don't even like Donald Trump, but they're so scared of him.

他們甚至不喜歡唐納德-特朗普，但他們卻如此害怕他。

Ted Cruz was on our show in, I think it was 2016.

泰德-克魯茲上過我們的節目，我想那是在2016年。

He told me, and this is a quote, he said this on television.

他告訴我，這是引用，他是在電視上說的。

He said, if I were in my car and getting ready to reverse and saw Donald in the backup camera,

他說，如果我在車裡準備倒車，在倒車攝像頭裡看到唐納德、

I'm not confident which pedal I'd push.

我不知道該踩哪個踏板。

But that primal urge to run Trump over didn't stop Sweaty Teddy and all the other pathetic sycophants jockeying for lip spades on his big pimply ass from pretending to be outraged by this incredibly brazen attack on their beloved Baron von Schitzenpants.

但是，這種想撞死特朗普的原始衝動並沒有阻止汗溼的泰迪和其他可悲的諂媚者在他的大疙瘩屁股上爭奪嘴脣上的黑桃，假裝對他們心愛的馮-施岑潘男爵受到的這種令人難以置信的無恥攻擊感到憤怒。

An absolute sham trial.

這絕對是一場虛假的審判。

When people here ask me what the heck is going on in your country, I am ashamed.

當這裡的人問我你們國家到底發生了什麼事時，我感到很羞愧。

This is the most outrageous travesty I've ever seen.

這是我見過的最離譜的滑稽劇。

Hey, James Comer, you coward.

嘿，詹姆斯-科默，你這個懦夫。

How about you subpoena Judge Merchant and his daughter?

你傳喚莫森法官和他女兒怎麼樣？

Get to the bottom of this sham trial.

查清這場虛假審判的真相

This is a shameful political stunt perpetrated by Joe Biden.

這是喬-拜登製造的可恥的政治噱頭。

Unbelievable.

難以置信

Un-fricking-believable.

難以置信

We the people stand with Donald Trump.

我們人民與唐納德-特朗普站在一起。

This will be reversed on appeal.

上訴將推翻這一判決。

We're doing a special podcast tonight to break it all down.

我們將在今晚的播客中進行特別報道。

Oh, we won't want to miss that.

哦，我們可不想錯過。

And if you believe Donald Trump has been victimized, please subscribe to Ted Cruz's podcast right now.

如果你認為唐納德-特朗普是受害者，請馬上訂閱特德-克魯茲的播客。

What a snail.

真是隻蝸牛。

And then we heard from Maga Teresa himself.

然後，我們聽到了馬加-特雷莎本人的聲音。

He held a doozy of a press conference this morning at Trump Tower.

今天上午，他在特朗普大廈召開了一場聲勢浩大的新聞發佈會。

He took no questions at the press conference.

他在新聞發佈會上沒有回答任何問題。

Instead, he rambled like the drunken best man at a wedding you know isn't going to work.

相反，他滔滔不絕，就像婚禮上醉醺醺的伴郎，你明知他不會成功。

This is a case where if they can do this to me, they can do this to anyone.

如果他們能這樣對我，就能這樣對任何人。

Do what?

做什麼？

Your hair?

你的頭髮？

You should get your lawyers on whoever did that to you.

不管是誰對你做了這種事，你都應該去找律師。

But in a way, he's right.

但在某種程度上，他是對的。

They can do this to anyone.

他們可以對任何人這樣做。

They can do this to anyone who cheats on his wife with a porn star and then falsifies business records to keep her quiet so he can win a presidential election.

他們可以這樣對待那些與色情女星偷情，然後偽造商業記錄以讓妻子保持沉默從而贏得總統選舉的人。

Congratulations.

祝賀你

You finally understand what you're in charge of.

你終於明白自己在負責什麼。

And then he shifted into complete nonsense mode.

然後他就完全進入了胡說八道模式。

They want to raise your taxes by four times.

他們想把你的稅收提高四倍。

They want to stop you from having cars.

他們想阻止你們擁有汽車。

That's right.

這就對了。

It's going to be like the Flintstones, folks.

就像 "打火石 "一樣，夥計們。

You're going to have to use your own feet to go places.

你必須用自己的雙腳才能到達目的地。

But go on, Donald.

但繼續說，唐納德。

The judge allowed them to go into everything that I was ever involved in.

法官允許他們調查我參與的所有事情。

Not this case.

這個案例不是。

Everything that I was ever involved in, which is a first.

我參與的所有活動，這還是第一次。

In other words, you could go into every single thing that I ever did.

換句話說，你可以瞭解我做過的每一件事。

Was he a bad boy here?

他是這裡的壞男孩嗎？

Was he a bad boy there?

他在那裡是個壞孩子嗎？

Oh, yes.

哦，是的。

Quote Diddy.

引用迪迪的話

Good move right now.

現在走得不錯。

Bad boy for life.

一輩子的壞小子

And then he went back to the biggest lie of all of them.

然後，他又撒了一個最大的謊。

Well, now, I can't even imagine even his most hardcore supporters believe this preposterous claim that he had, there was no interlude with Stormy Daniels at all.

好了，現在，我甚至無法想象 即使是他最鐵桿的支持者 相信這個荒謬的說法 他有，有沒有插曲 與斯托米・丹尼爾斯在所有。

They were able to use people salacious.

他們可以利用一些可疑的人。

By the way, and nothing ever happened.

順便說一句，什麼都沒發生過。

There was no anything.

什麼都沒有。

Nothing ever happened, and they know it.

什麼都沒發生過，他們自己也知道。

Yeah, right.

是啊，沒錯。

She made the whole thing up.

整件事都是她編出來的。

You know what she did, Stormy Daniels?

你知道她做了什麼嗎，斯托米-丹尼爾斯？

She went back in time.

她回到了過去。

She snuck into his hotel room.

她偷偷溜進了他的酒店房間。

She took all her clothes off.

她脫掉了所有的衣服。

And she slipped in underneath him while he was napping to prevent him from one day being president.

她趁他打盹時，悄悄潛入他的身下，以防他有朝一日當上總統。

It's diabolical.

這太邪惡了。

This woman, I'm going to tell you something.

這個女人，我要告訴你一件事。

She's an evil genius.

她是個邪惡的天才。

Hush money, hush money.

封口費，封口費

It's not hush money.

這不是封口費。

It's called the non-disclosure agreement.

這就是所謂的保密協議。

So it's not hush money.

所以這不是封口費。

It's a non-disclosure agreement, totally legal, totally common.

這是一份保密協議，完全合法，也很常見。

Everyone has it.

每個人都有。

That's right.

這就對了。

You guys have them, right?

你們有吧？

I mean, everyone has them.

我是說，每個人都有。

My grandmother had dozens of them.

我祖母有幾十個。

She'd give them out for Halloween.

她會在萬聖節時把它們送出去。

That's like saying everyone has a Bentley.

這就好比說每個人都有一輛賓利。

Everyone has one.

每個人都有一個。

You know how on Gilligan's Island,

你知道《吉利根的小島》裡是怎麼說的吧、

Gilligan sometimes would get hit on the head with a coconut?

吉利根有時會被椰子砸到頭？

You remember?

你還記得嗎？

You ever see the show, Guillermo?

吉列爾莫，你看過這齣戲嗎？

And then he got crazy for 20 minutes?

然後他瘋狂了 20 分鐘？

That's what this speech was like today.

今天的演講就是這樣。

But you know, he's a sleazebag.

但你知道，他是個卑鄙小人。

I wonder how many people here have cars.

不知道這裡有多少人有車。

Yesterday in McDonald's, you had a man hitting him up with machetes.

昨天在麥當勞，有人用砍刀砍他。

We're going to fight Maca.

我們要和瑪卡戰鬥。

We're going to stop Maca.

我們要阻止瑪卡。

You know, I ended the Russian pipeline.

你知道，我結束了俄羅斯的輸油管道。

It was dead.

它死了。

We're begging Venezuela for oil.

我們向委內瑞拉乞討石油。

The Congo has just released a lot of people from jail.

剛果剛剛從監獄裡釋放了很多人。

Congo, Africa.

剛果，非洲。

Our kids can't have a Little League game anymore.

我們的孩子再也不能參加少棒比賽了。

Migrants are living in luxury hotels.

移民們住在豪華酒店裡。

And I grabbed him around the neck.

我掐住了他的脖子。

And he rebuffed me.

他拒絕了我。

And then I went to the other guy, who I think is a black belt in karate.

然後我去找另一個人，我想他是空手道黑帶。

He's a black belt in karate.

他是空手道黑帶。

They know how to get somebody from around their neck.

他們知道如何把人從脖子上拽下來。

I'm wired in such a way that a lot of people would have gone away a long time ago.

我的性格決定了很多人很早就會離開我。

We're going to fight.

我們要戰鬥

It's actually, I don't know.

實際上，我也不知道。

Thank you very much.

非常感謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

Thank you.

謝謝。

It's interesting that he chose to play the insanity card after the trial.

有趣的是，他在審判後選擇打精神錯亂牌。

He's got so many screws loose, Boeing might have to issue a recall.

他有太多螺絲鬆了，波音公司可能不得不召回他。

So now that the trial is over comes the sad part, which is the goodbyes.

現在，審判結束了，悲傷的部分來了，那就是告別。

Trump's attorney, Todd Blanche, who's definitely not getting paid, by the way, this man was forced to take the opposite of a victory lap on cable news last night.

順便說一句，特朗普的律師託德-布蘭奇（Todd Blanche）肯定沒拿到錢，此人昨晚被迫在有線電視新聞上走了一圈勝利的反面。

Blanche said, Trump himself helped to direct his defense strategy, which explains why it worked so well.

布蘭奇說，特朗普本人也幫助指導了他的辯護策略，這就解釋了為什麼效果如此之好。

It was Blanche's idea to not put Trump on the witness stand.

不讓特朗普出庭作證是布蘭奇的主意。

It was Trump's idea to sleep and fart through the whole trial.

在整個審判過程中睡覺放屁是特朗普的主意。

I get a kick out of Todd Blanche.

我很喜歡託德-布蘭奇。

He'd just stand there scowling while Trump yelled.

特朗普大喊大叫時，他就站在那裡皺眉頭。

He wouldn't say anything.

他什麼也不肯說。

He looked like the guy waiting outside the bathroom stall who really has to go.

他看起來就像在廁所隔間外等著的那個人，真的要走了。

And who would hire a lawyer named Todd?

誰會僱一個叫託德的律師呢？

I mean, no offense, but we have a dog named Todd.

我無意冒犯，但我們家有隻狗叫託德。

I wouldn't hire him as my.

我不會僱他做我的。

And with the trial now behind us, we put together a short video to honor both Todds.

隨著審判的結束，我們製作了一段視頻短片來紀念託德夫婦。

It's a disgrace to the New York state and city court system.

這是紐約州和市法院系統的恥辱。

And all of the cases are, frankly, all of them are.

坦率地說，所有案件都是如此。

Oh, poor Mike Pence.

哦，可憐的邁克-彭斯。

Must be so jealous right now.

你現在一定很嫉妒吧？

So Trump is scheduled to be sentenced on July 11th, which is four days before the Republican National Convention.

是以，特朗普定於 7 月 11 日被判刑，也就是共和黨全國代表大會的四天前。

Also, free Slurpee Day at 7-Eleven, which at J.R.

此外，7-Eleven 的思樂冰免費日也在 J.R.

Mott.

莫特

It's weird that a convicted felon, probably the only job Donald Trump could get right now, is president of the United States.

一個被定罪的重罪犯，可能是唐納德-特朗普現在唯一能得到的工作，卻成了美國總統，這太奇怪了。

I mean, I don't know.

我的意思是，我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I don't know.

我不知道。

Mr. Pence's probably the CEO of the United States.

彭斯先生可能是美國的首席執行官。

His team is milking these legal troubles for all they're worth.

他的團隊正在充分利用這些法律糾紛。

His campaign claims they raked in a little more than $34 million yesterday in donations.

他的競選團隊聲稱，他們昨天共獲得了 3400 多萬美元的捐款。

That's $1 million per felony, which had he known that, he probably would have committed more of them.

如果他知道這一點，他可能會犯下更多的重罪。

Trump's people are also working to make sure he is the only one who makes money off this.

特朗普的人也在努力確保他是唯一一個從中賺錢的人。

His campaign manager, this guy Chris LaCivita, issued a warning to other candidates who try to jump on the bandit wagon.

他的競選經理克里斯-拉西維塔（Chris LaCivita）向其他試圖加入 "強盜行列 "的候選人發出了警告。

He wrote, any Republican elected official, candidate, or party committee siphoning money from President Trump's donors are no better than Judge Mershawn's daughter.

他寫道，任何共和黨民選官員、候選人或黨委員會從特朗普總統的捐贈者那裡抽取錢財，都不會比默肖恩法官的女兒好到哪裡去。

We're keeping a list.

我們有一份名單。

We'll be checking it twice.

我們會檢查兩次。

And we aren't in the spirit of Christmas.

我們也沒有聖誕節的氣氛。

The only person who's allowed to cheat Trump supporters out of their lotto ticket money is Donald J. Trump himself.

唯一允許欺騙特朗普支持者樂透獎金的人就是唐納德-J-特朗普本人。

Go out and commit your own felonies if you want them.

如果你想犯重罪，就自己去犯吧。

I have to say, I'm surprised about the spirit of the Christmas thing, because Chris LaCivita,

我不得不說，我對聖誕節的精神感到驚訝，因為克里斯-拉西維塔、

I don't know if you've seen him, he looks like if Santa Claus got queer eyed.

我不知道你是否見過他，他看起來就像聖誕老人變了眼。

They are so shameless on Fox News.

他們在福克斯新聞上太無恥了。

This is incredible.

這太不可思議了。

See if you can follow the thinking here.

看看你是否能跟上這裡的思路。

Joe Biden, shamefully, is fundraising off of the political persecution of his opponent.

可恥的是，喬-拜登正在利用對手的政治迫害籌集資金。

That tells you everything you need to know about this current regime that is in power.

這就說明了你需要了解的當前執政政權的一切。

So go to DonaldJTrump.com, support President Trump, stand on the side of democracy.

是以，請訪問 DonaldJTrump.com，支持特朗普總統，站在民主的一邊。

And the worst part is she has no idea she said anything weird.

最糟糕的是，她根本不知道自己說了什麼奇怪的話。

They're too stupid to be hypocrites.

他們太蠢了，偽善得不象話。

At the White House today, President Biden had Taylor Swift's boyfriend, Travis Kelsey, and the rest of the Super Bowl champion Kansas City Chiefs.

今天在白宮，拜登總統請來了泰勒-斯威夫特的男友特拉維斯-凱爾西和超級碗冠軍堪薩斯城酋長隊的其他隊員。

They gave him a helmet, which he for some reason decided to put on.

他們給了他一頂頭盔，不知什麼原因，他決定戴上。

And now he can't get it off.

而現在，他怎麼也脫不下來了。

He's going to have to bury him in that thing.

他得把他埋在那東西里。

He did weigh in on the legal follies today, explaining in very plain terms that the trial was fair and that his opponent will be afforded every opportunity to appeal that's given to every defendant in every court of law.