I've known you both for the last five years and it has been a true pleasure to watch your distracting childish rivalry evolve into a distracting childish courtship.

我認識你們倆已經有五年了，看著你們從孩子氣的競爭演變成孩子氣的求愛，我真的很高興。

And now into what I'm sure will be a distracting childish marriage.

現在，我相信這將是一段令人心煩意亂的幼稚婚姻。

I'm proud of you, and I love you both.

我為你們感到驕傲，我愛你們倆。

Permission to say it back.

請允許我回應。

Permission granted.

允許。

I love you too, sir.

我也愛你，隊長。

I love you, Captain.

我愛你，隊長。

Is this seat taken?

這個座位有人坐嗎？

You're really gonna do this, Diaz?

你真的要這麼做嗎，迪亞茲？

My name is Rachel Weinstein.

我叫瑞秋溫斯坦。

I'm a graduate student on Sabbatical to study Birds at the University of Buenos Aires.

我是一名研究所學生，正在布宜諾斯艾利斯大學學習鳥類學。

You know, Cornell has a far better ornithology department and it's right here in New York.

康奈爾大學的鳥類學系要好得多，而且就在紐約。

Cornell has accused me of robbing a bank and is gonna send me to jail for 15 years.

康奈爾大學指控我搶劫銀行，要把我送進監獄 15 年。

I guess we're dropping the metaphor.

我想我們要放棄這個比喻了。

I don't know why you're here. You're not gonna change my mind.

我不知道你為什麼在這裡。你改變不了我的想法。

I know. I just wanted to say goodbye.

我知道。我只是想說再見。

OK, goodbye.

好的，再見。

I hope you know your family's gonna miss you.

我希望你知道你的家人會想念你的。

I don't care. I barely speak to them.

我不在乎。我幾乎不和他們說話。

I was talking about the 99.

我說的是 99 分局。

Be safe, Rachel Weinstein.

保重，瑞秋溫斯坦。

She's worried about her motorcycle sitting idle so she wants us to take it out once a day. Here.

她擔心她的摩托車長時間停放不用，所以她希望我們每天都騎一下。鑰匙給你。

I think you should do this. You're more the biker type.

我覺得應該你去騎。你更像是會騎摩托車的那種人。

I've seen you use a toothpick in public.

我看過你在公共場合使用牙籤。

Motorcycles are death machines. I have three kids. I'm not risking it.

摩托車是死亡機器。我有三個孩子，我不想冒這個風險。

Are you saying my life matters less because I don't conform to society's heteronormative child centric ideals?

你是在說，因為我不符合社會的異性戀規範和以兒童為中心的理念，所以我的生命比較沒價值嗎？

Are you really playing the gay card right now?

你現在是在打同志牌嗎？

Yeah.

是啊。

We gotta get there quick.

我們得快點過去。

Maybe we should take the chopper.

也許我們應該搭乘直升機。

Use a chopper.

搭直升機！

Death blade, Sidewinder. It's go time.

死亡之刃，側風蛇。開始行動。

Roger that, Wet Blanket.

收到，Wet Blanket。

No, from now on, call me Velvet Thunder.

好的，從現在開始，叫我絲絨之雷。

Okay.

好喔。」

What's going on here? What are you doing?

這裡發生了什麼事？ 你們在幹什麼？

Captain, hey, nothing. Just eating some marshmallows. Care for one?

隊長，嘿，沒什麼。 只是吃一些棉花糖。 要吃一個嗎？

Marshmallow.

棉花糖。

I knew it.

我就知道。

Treat her gently.

對她好一點。

You know that's not a nice car, right?

你知道那不是一輛好車，對吧？

Say that again.

再說一遍。

Damn, Cap, be cool.

拜託，隊長，沒事。

Say that again.

再說一遍。

That's what I thought.

我也是這麼想的。

I'll be the venue.

我會負責場地。

Yes, you should be very proud of yourself.

是的，你應該為自己感到驕傲。

I know things aren't exactly where you want to be right now, but I promise you, they will improve.

我知道現在情況並不盡如人意，但我向你保證，情況會好轉的。

Thank you, Captain.

謝謝你，隊長。

Every time someone steps up and says who they are, the world becomes a better, more interesting place.

每當有人站出來說出自己的身份，世界就會變得更美好、更有趣。

So, thank you.

所以，謝謝你。

Well, I wish you'd said something before I spent all day making it.

我真希望你能在我花了一整天時間製作之前說點什麼。

Of course, you didn't want to burst my bubble unintended, and then you did.

當然，你不想無意間打破我的幻想，但最後你還是這麼做了。

So nice of you to greet us, Madeleine.

你好有禮，Madeleine。

I thought surely you'd still be crushed under that house in Munchkinland.

我還以為你一定還在莊園地區的那座房子下面被壓著呢。

Sticks and stones, Raymond.

這對我不痛不癢，雷。

Describing your breakfast?

你是在說你的早餐嗎？

Are you sure you wouldn't like some help with this?

你確定不需要幫助嗎？

No need.

不需要。

Now for my first Tweet, I think I should give an update on the water main break that's actually informative.

對於我的第一條推文，我認為我應該提供有關主水管破裂的有用消息。

"NYC H20-Main SITREP: at 2040 EDT current PSI 456 MAX CAP 204000 LPM."

「紐約市主水管狀況報告，時間 2040，東部夏令時，目前位置 456，最大容量 204000 公升每分鐘。」

Suck on that tasty lemon drop, Olivia Crawford.

吃我這記酸檸硬糖拳，奧莉薇雅·克勞馥。

Oh, look at that. An alert.

噢，瞧瞧，有提醒了。

I'm probably trending already.

我可能已經成為熱門話題了。

What? My account has been deactivated.

什麼？我的帳戶被停用了。

Twitter thinks you're a bot.

Twitter 認為你是個機器人。

Why?

為什麼？

I'm a human. I'm a human male.

我是人類，我是人類男性。

How dare you disobey me?

你竟敢違抗我？

Come on, sir.

拜託，隊長。

It was a good tip and we're trying to catch a serial killer.

這是個很好的線索，我們正試圖抓住一個連環殺手。

Well, then let's see this tip, this groundbreaking tip that threatens to blow the case wide open.

好吧，那就讓我們來看看這條線索，這條有可能讓案件真相大白的突破性線索。

Ok, I know this tone, here comes petty Holt.

好吧，我知道這個語氣，小心眼霍特來了。

Nah bitch, I'm not being petty.

不，婊子，我沒有小心眼。

You just said, "Nah, bitch."

你剛才說：「不，婊子。」

Show me the tip.

帶我去看這條線索。

This is the boat.

這就是那艘船。

Now, Charles has to think we're totally sober and we solved his puzzle so we good?

現在，查爾斯必須認為我們完全清醒，並且我們解決了他的難題，明白了嗎？

Yep, I'm drunk as hell.

是的，我醉得一塌糊塗。

That's not what I asked.

我不是這麼說的。

Don't worry about me.

別擔心我。

I've seen you do enough of these harebrained schemes in order to play along.

我看你實施過好多次這種輕率的計畫了。

If Charles asks what's wrong, I'll just put on a quick smile and say nothing.

如果查爾斯問我怎麼了，我就訕訕一笑，說沒什麼大不了的。

Amazing. That is actually perfect.

很棒，其實很完美。

Ok. We have a few more questions for you, Doctor.

好的。我們還有幾個問題要問你，醫生。

Doctor, huh?

醫生啊？

It's funny when people call dentist doctor.

當人們叫一個牙醫"醫生"的時候 挺有趣的

We are doctors.

我們是醫生啊。

We do four years of medical school.

我們讀四年醫學院。

No, it's called dental school.

不對，他是叫牙科學校。

But we learn about the entire body.

但我們學習整個人體。

But if you have cancer, you wouldn't call a dentist.

但如果你得了癌症，你不會去找牙醫。

You know, it's actually harder to get into dental school than medical school.

其實進入牙科學校比進入醫學院更難。

Because there are fewer dental schools because most people want to become actual doctors.

因為牙科學校很少，因為大多數人都想成為真正的醫生。

That's ridiculous.

這太荒謬了。

It's not like we're college professors calling ourselves doctors.

我們又不是自稱博士（醫生）的大學教授。

Not the same thing, my friend. - Well, sure it is.

這情況不一樣，朋友。- 一樣啊。

When someone has a heart attack on a plane, do they yell out, "Yo, does anybody here have an art history PhD?"

當有個人在飛機上心臟病發作的時候，會有人呼喊：「喲，這裡有人有藝術史PhD嗎？」

A PhD is a doctorate. It's literally describing a doctor.

PhD是博士學位，字面上的意思就是在描述一個博士。

Maybe, let's refocus.

也許，讓我們重新聚焦。

No. The problem here is that medical practitioners have co-opted the word doctor.

這裡的問題就是執業醫生籠絡了這個字「博士」。

I know we live in a world where anything can mean anything and nobody even cares about--

我知道我們住在一個可以用任何東西來描述任何事物的世界，沒有人會在意——

Apparently that's a trigger for me.

顯然，這是我的一個地雷。

Yeah.

是啊。

Oh, I see.

哦，我明白了。

You have a knife but what you need is an umbrella.

你有一把刀，但你需要的是一把傘。

Tell him why.

告訴他為什麼。

Tell him why.

告訴他為什麼。

Because there's a storm gonna rain down on you, punk.

因為暴風雨就要降臨在你這個廢物身上了。

And if I'm not ready with a guy as great as Marcus, then what if I'm never ready?

如果我還沒準備好和馬庫斯這樣很棒的人在一起，那麼如果我從來沒有準備好怎麼辦？

What if that was it?

如果就是這樣呢？

My one chance of love.

我唯一的愛情。

What if I never get a second chance?

如果我再也沒有機會了呢？

I don't know.

我不知道。

I'm just, I'm just sad.

我只是很難過。

Well, I understand. It must be very difficult.

嗯，我，我知道這一定很困難。

Wait, are you crying?

等等，你在哭嗎？

Yes.

是的。

Thank you for acknowledging my feelings.

謝謝你認同我的感受。

Thank you for acknowledging mine.

感謝你對我的認可。

We're both great at this.

我們都很擅長這個。

On my first day here, I asked Jeffords to tell me about everyone.

來到這裡的第一天，我請傑福茲向我介紹每個人。

He told me you were a great detective, but the one thing you couldn't figure out was how to grow up.

他告訴我你是個好警探，但你就是長不大。

Well, I think you finally figured it out.

我想你終於長大了。

Well, thank you, sir.

謝謝你，隊長。

I couldn't have done it without you.

沒有你，我是做不到的。

Over the years you've sometimes referred to me as something of a father figure.

多年來，你有時將我視為父親般的人物。

Did I? I didn't realize that.

我有嗎？我沒有意識到。

But I want you to know, if I had had a son and he'd turn out like you.

但我想讓你知道，如果我有個兒子，他會像你這樣。

I would be very proud of him.

我會為他感到非常自豪。

Thank you, sir.

謝謝你，隊長。

Not expecting to get this emotional.

沒有預期會這麼感人。

It's not bad for an old robot, huh?

作為一個老機器人，還不錯吧？

Sir, did you just make a joke?

你剛才是開玩笑嗎？

I believe I did.

我相信我剛過開完笑了。

Yes, I guess in the end, we rubbed off on each other quite a bit.

是的，我想最終我們互相影響了不少。

Title of your sex movie.

你的性愛影片標題。

Did I do it right?

我說的對嗎？

It was perfect.

太完美了。

I wanna say, it has been a pleasure to have worked alongside all of you for the past 21.5 months.

我想說，在過去的 21 個半月裡，我很高興能與大家共事。

I'm sorry for getting so emotional.

對不起，我太情緒化了。

Pretty consistent tone, actually.

其實語調很一致。

These have been the, these have been the best years of my career.

這些年是我職業生涯中最美好的時光。

I don't know. This is new.

我不認得這個語調，是新的。

And I know that every one of you give me everything you had and I will never forget it.

我知道你們每個人都給了我你們所擁有的一切，我永遠不會忘記。

Go back to being robot, Captain.

回去當機器人吧，隊長。

Dismissed.

解散。