CALM DOWN, CALM DOWN

冷靜點，冷靜點

Do exactly what I say.

嚴格按照我說的做。

And just accept the fact that there are no guarantees in life.

而且只要接受這樣一個事實：生活中沒有任何保證。

Exepcially right now...

特別是現在...

Because you have like statistically about a 0.01 percent chance of surviving.

因為據統計，你有大約0.01%的機會活下來。

But again CALM DOWN

但還是要冷靜下來

Now's not the time to panic. Now is the time to focus.

現在不是恐慌的時候。現在是專注的時候。

Because if you just jumped out of the plane from the standard twelve and a half thousand feet,

因為如果你只是從標準的一萬二千五百英尺高空跳下飛機、

you've only got about 74 and 1/4 seconds to figure out a way to increase your chances of survival.

你只有大約74又1/4秒的時間來想辦法增加你的生存機會。

First things first

第一件事

Slow your descent

放慢你的下降速度

Spread out your body into an X formation like this

將你的身體分散成一個X形，像這樣

get as flight as humanly possible making sure that the front of your body is facing the ground

儘可能地飛行，確保你的身體正面朝向地面。

This will help you achieve better drag

這將幫助你實現更好的阻力

you're confused about which direction the ground is

你對地面的方向感到困惑

It's where you heading toward

這是你走向的地方

Next things next

接下來的事情接下來

Try your Backup chute

試試你的備份滑道

pull and release the breakaway handle to your primary chute

拉動並釋放你的主滑道的分離式手柄

its most likely attached on your right looks like a clock loop.

它很可能連接在你的右邊，看起來像一個時鐘環。

Yeah, that's the one

是的，這就是那個

The one on your parachute pack use two hands and pull it.

你降落傘包上的那個用兩隻手去拉。

Pull it now

現在就拉

But now you're probably spinning uncontrollably.

但現在你可能正不受控制地旋轉著。

Get back into the X formation then locate, and pull the reserve ripcord on your left.

回到X陣型中，然後找到並拉動你左邊的備用繩索。

It's opposite the loop. You just pulled. It's probably colored red.

它與循環相反。你剛拉過。它可能是紅色的。

That's your backup chute.

那是你的備用滑道。

Keep your head upwards and start scanning your surroundings.

抬起頭，開始掃描周圍的環境。

You're looking for three things.

你要找的是三件事。

Swamp, snow, trees.

沼澤、雪、樹。

your best chance of surviving is to land in one of those three.

你最好的生存機會是降落在這三個地方之一。

Just away from water.

就在遠離水的地方。

Lean whichever direction you want to move in,

不管你想往哪個方向走，都要靠攏、

but don't go into a spin when the moments right

但不要在適當的時候陷入混亂。

pull yourself up and point your toes to the ground so that you land on your feet.

把自己拉起來，將腳趾指向地面，使你的腳掌著地。

We're gonna use them to absorb the impact of the fall.

我們要用它們來吸收墜落的衝擊。

So cover the back of your head with your hands like you're doing a sit-up.

所以用你的手捂住你的後腦勺，就像你在做仰臥起坐一樣。

You need to protect your skull and protect your neck.

你需要保護你的頭骨，保護你的脖子。

Go into the fall rolling forward like you're doing a somersault.

進入秋天時，要像翻筋斗一樣向前滾動。

[ body falling to the ground sound ]

[身體倒在地上的聲音]

(Yes, but I become a pretzel.)

(是的，但我變成了椒鹽餅。)

[Robot Voice] [Victory Noise]

[機器人的聲音] [勝利的噪音]

I mean, that's the weird thing about "Neurogenic Shock", y'know.

我的意思是，這就是 "神經性休克 "的奇怪之處，你知道。

It's caused by over exciting the parasympathetic nervous system.

這是由副交感神經系統過度興奮引起的。

What you're about to experience is actually called "Bradycardia".

你即將經歷的事情實際上被稱為 "心動過緩"。

Which is a substantial decrease in your heart rate.

這是你的心率大幅下降。

And that will lead to a dangerous drop in blood pressure.

而這將導致危險的血壓下降。

So y'know, you're probably feeling very, very, very, sleepy right now.

所以你知道，你現在可能感到非常、非常、非常、睏倦。

But do not go to sleep.

但不要去睡覺。

Help is on the way, and you need to be wake when they get here!

救援在路上，當他們到達時，你需要醒過來!

You're gonna be okaaaayyy!!!!

你將會是Okaaaayyy!!!!

That there was only 0.0007 percent chance that what just happened to you would actually happen.

剛剛發生在你身上的事情只有0.0007%的可能性會真正發生。

you've just experienced something that almost nobody in existence has ever or will ever experience.

你剛剛經歷了幾乎沒有人曾經或將要經歷的事情。

Think of all the money you'll make off the book deal that you'll invariably sign.

想一想你會從簽下的書約中賺到多少錢吧。

You'll have a story for your grand kids,

你會有一個故事給你的孫子、

you'll be on The Today Show, and you'll get to meet Al Roker.

你會上《今日秀》，你會見到阿爾-羅克。

Summon the will to live by thinking about how happy you'll be when you get to meet Al Roker.

喚起生活的意志，想想當你能見到阿爾-羅克時，你會有多高興。

You probably have your own daily double question in jeopardy in a few years

你可能在幾年內有自己的每日雙倍問題處於危險之中

They'll make a dramatic movie about you where some famous actor or actress will play you.

他們會把你拍成一部戲劇性的電影，由一些著名的演員或女演員來扮演你。

You'll probably even get to sit next to them at the Oscars because let's face it.

你甚至可能會在奧斯卡頒獎典禮上坐在他們旁邊，因為讓我們面對它。

This is the kind of story that the Academy absolutely fawns over.

這就是學院絕對青睞的那種故事。

The parachute company that you just used.

你剛才用的那個降落傘公司。

They'll probably pay you a large sum of money to keep you from, y'know, suing them.

他們可能會給你一大筆錢，以防止你，你知道，起訴他們。

You'll get your own personal entry on this Wikipedia page.

你會在這個維基百科頁面上得到你自己的個人條目。

You'll forever be able to one-up any exciting story told by anyone you ever go out to dinner with.

你將永遠能夠勝過任何與你一起出去吃飯的人所講的精彩故事。

[Woman's Voice] "Oh, you went backpacking in Colorado!

[女人的聲音] "哦，你去科羅拉多州揹包旅行了！"！

Did I ever told you about the time that I survived falling from 12,500 feet." (that is a lot of feet)

我有沒有告訴過你，有一次我從12,500英尺高空墜落時倖存下來。"(那是一個很大的英尺)

they might even ask you to throw out the first pitch at the World Series.

他們甚至可能要求你在世界大賽上投出第一球。

I don't know.

我不知道。

that a YouTube video was the critical factor that...

一段YouTube視頻是導致...的關鍵因素。

So y'know, if somebody else happens to tweet some afternoon that they too are falling from the sky.

所以，你知道，如果其他人碰巧在某個下午發推特說他們也是從天上掉下來的。

You can send them a link to this video, and pass your good fortune on.

你可以把這個視頻的鏈接發給他們，並把你的好運氣傳給他們。

and on that note, while you're waiting for the ambulance and trying to y' know... stay conscious.

關於這一點，當你在等待救護車並試圖......保持清醒的時候。

Consider watching these other cool videos from yours truly, and subscribing to my channel.

考慮觀看這些來自你真正的其他很酷的視頻，並訂閱我的頻道。

Unless you... like y'know.... want to call for help or something. I don't care. You do you.

除非你......比如你知道....，想打電話求救什麼的。我不在乎。你做你的。

Captions By: joshuaktanki

字幕作者: joshuaktanki