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  • I love to play with children. I think they're, I think children are brilliant.

    我喜歡和孩子們一起玩耍。我覺得他們很聰明。

  • I think they have so much to teach adults, so I appreciate them for that.

    我認為他們可以教導成人很多事情,所以我很感激他們。

  • I just won't be having my own.

    我只是不會生自己的小孩。

  • The world perceives child-free women in the most negative light possible.

    這個世界上對於沒有孩子的女性有著極其負面的看法。

  • I think it's not a need for women anymore.

    我認為這對於女性來說已經不再是必要的了。

  • We don't need to have children.

    我們不一定需要小孩。

  • We find that our own happiness is more important; our own mental health is more important.

    我們發現自己的幸福、心理健康更重要。

  • We have been called selfish.

    別人說我們自私。

  • We've been called narcissists, which is kind of strange.

    別人說我們自戀,這很奇怪。

  • I do have a coworker who recently had a baby.

    我有一位同事最近生小孩了。

  • All of my other coworkers were like ogling over him and making silly faces and I'm just like typing away on my computer.

    我的其他同事都在對著他傻笑做鬼臉,而我卻只是坐在電腦前打字。

  • When it comes to when I knew that I didn't wanna have children, it's hard to say only because I don't remember ever feeling like I did.

    當談到我知道自己不想要孩子的時候,這很難說,因為我不記得曾有過這樣的感覺。

  • I don't know what the feeling is like to want to have children.

    我不知道想要孩子的感覺是怎樣的。

  • When I am in groups and there are persons talking about wanting children and I don't know how to respond.

    當我身處於一群人中,聽到他們談論想要孩子的時候,我不知道該如何回應。

  • In middle school, one of my friends, she said she never had the desire to have kids.

    在中學時期,我有一個朋友,她說她從來沒有想過要孩子的慾望。

  • And she said that and I was like, "Oh, I didn't realize that that was an option."

    她這麼說的時候,我心想:「哦,我沒有發現這原來也是一個選擇。」

  • And when she said that I was like, "I don't know if I wanna have kids either."

    當她說出這番話時,我說:「我也不知道想不想要小孩。」

  • What really sealed the deal for me was my time as a teacher and my time as a nanny.

    真正讓我下定決心的是我當老師和保姆的經驗。

  • I remember feeling two different ways about my students.

    我記得我對我的學生有兩種不同的感覺。

  • One was that I wanted to adopt them all and keep them and take care of them and love them and nurture them.

    一種是讓我想要養他們並照顧、愛護和培育他們。

  • And then the other part of me was like, "Oh my gosh, this is all day, every day."

    然后我另外一種是:「哦,天哪,這是每天、整天都會發生的事情。」

  • And that's when the first seeds of maybe this isn't for me started to spring up.

    那時,「也許這不適合我」的想法開始萌芽了。

  • I knew for sure that having kids was not what I wanted to do because of my gut instinctive reaction, which was kind of like illness, kind of like a tunnel that just shot out in front of me and looked very, very dark.

    因為我的直覺反應,我很確定知道我不想要孩子,這種感覺就像是疾病,就像是一個通道突然在我面前打開,但看起來非常非常黑暗。

  • I find it very interesting that a lot of the people who do give me push back on not wanting to have kids are women.

    我發現很有趣的是,對於我不想要孩子這件事,很多反對我的人都是女性。

  • If you are a woman and you don't understand why somebody else doesn't wanna have kids, learn about it, ask about it.

    如果你是一個女性,且不理解為什麼其他人不想要孩子,那就去了解一下,問一問別人的想法吧。

  • Don't immediately like shut them down or think that they're heartless.

    不要立刻否定他們或認為他們沒有沒血沒淚。

  • I don't think that I'm a heartless person.

    我不覺得我是個無情的人。

  • Hands down responses from women are way worse.

    毫無疑問,女性的反應更糟糕。

  • With men, it's more like a curiosity like, "Oh, how did you come to this decision?"

    對於男性而言,他們比較像是出於好奇地問說:「那你是怎麼做出這個決定的?」

  • Women see it as an invitation to convince me otherwise it's, "Oh, not right now. But you'll want some in the future."

    女性通常會將這種情況看作是說服我改變想法的邀請,例如説:「現在不想,但將來你一定會想要孩子的。」

  • "What are you gonna do when you're old and you're alone?"

    「當你年老獨居時該怎麼辦?」

  • Whatever I want. That's what I'll do.

    做我想做的事啊。我想要的就是這樣。

  • Regret is another threat.

    「後悔」是另一種威脅。

  • "Also, you'll regret it when you get older."

    「而且,當你變老時,你會後悔不要孩子。」

  • The thing about regret is you don't regret not doing what you don't want to do.

    關於後悔這件事,你不會因為沒有做你不想做的事情而後悔。

  • My parents know I don't want kids.

    我父母知道我不想要小孩。

  • They've known pretty much my whole life.

    他們一直都很清楚知道。

  • I've kind of prepped them already, like, "Don't ask because you know, the answer."

    我已經幫他們打好預防針了,告訴過他們不要問我,因為他們明知道答案了。

  • In terms of pressure from my family, I don't get it quite so much from my parents, but I do get it from my grandmother.

    關於來自親人的壓力,我父母沒有給我太多,但我的祖母會對我施加壓力。

  • (The) pressure to marry somebody Jewish so that I could raise Jewish kids.

    必須和一個猶太人結婚,這樣我就能養育出猶太孩子的壓力。

  • I understand and that she's like, come where she's coming from and like, I know she just wants the best for me.

    我理解她的想法,我知道她是出於關心我才這樣做的。

  • But at the end of the day, I always end the conversation saying, "It's my decision. It's my life."

    但最後,我總是以「這是我的決定,這是我的人生」為結束這個話題。

  • (I'm) Identified (as) an Afro-Latina.

    我是拉丁非洲裔。

  • My father is from the Dominican Republic who has African roots.

    我的爸爸來自多明尼加共和國,他有非洲的血統。

  • My mother is from Puerto Rico.

    我的媽媽來自波多黎各。

  • So when I think about if I were raising a child in this world, I think black child in this world, you can't control how other people perceive that.

    當我想到如果我在這個世界上養育一個孩子,一個黑人孩子,你無法控制其他人如何看待他。

  • My mother was bent on me having kids, "Oh, they would be so perfect."

    我母親非常希望我生孩子,說著:「他們會非常完美的。」

  • But I've spoken to them and I've started saying I'm pushing 40 and my time is up.

    但我已經和他們聊過,並說我快要 40 歲了,適合生小孩的時間已經過了。

  • And I've been saying that since I was 35. I'm now 36.

    我從 35 歲開始就一直這樣說了,現在我 36 歲了。

  • But it seems to work.

    但感覺有效。

  • My stepmother was, we were fighting and she said, "You'll see what this is like when you have kids."

    我的繼母和我吵架時說:「等你有了孩子,你就會知道這是什麼感覺了。」

  • And I said, "I'm never having kids."

    而我說:「我永遠都不會有小孩。」

  • And she said, "Yes, you will. You don't know what you want, you'll change your mind. You'll see."

    她則說:「會,你會的。你不知道到你想要什麼,你會改變想法的,你等著瞧。」

  • What doesn't occur to people is that a five-year-old could walk up to a grown-up and say, "I can't wait to be a mommy when I grow up,"

    令人無法理解的是,一個五歲的孩子可能跟成年人說「我長大後迫不及待地想當媽媽」,

  • and they will never say you'll change your mind.

    絕對不會有人告訴她她會改變主意。

  • But if a little five-year-old girl comes up and says, "I don't want kids," she's loony or she's too young, she can't possibly know her mind.

    但如果一個五歲的小女孩說「我不想要孩子」,她就會被說是很蠢或是太年輕,不可能了解自己的想法。

  • Guys in my past have been like, "Oh, she'll make a great mom."

    我過去的男友總是說:「她會成為一個很好的媽媽。」

  • This is perfect.

    太棒了吧。

  • It's been important to find someone who is interested in and cares about me for me and not what I can produce for him.

    重要的是找到一個對我感興趣和關心我的人,而不是我能為他生小孩。

  • Like I have Tinder and like, I'll see guys on there that are like maybe ten years older than me and they're like looking to start a family.

    我在 Tinder 之類的上面會看到比我大十歲的人說他們想要組建一個家庭。

  • I'm like, that's probably the worst thing you could put in your bio 'cause that's making every woman run away.

    我想,這可能是你能在你的自我介上中放上最糟糕的東西了,因為它會嚇跑所有女性。

  • I mean, at least that's how I see it.

    至少我是這樣認為。

  • Nowadays, dating in New York City is really tough and I don't go on more than like, three or four dates with somebody.

    如今,在紐約市約會真的很難,我最多只和一個對象約會三四次。

  • Not on purpose just because, you know, dating sucks.

    不是故意的,是因為約會很爛。

  • But it hasn't come up, it hasn't become a deal breaker up to this point.

    但到目前為止,這個問題還沒有出現,也還沒有成為決定性的因素。

  • My partner and I were very serious in our relationship once we moved and bought a home.

    我和我的伴侶在我們搬家和買房後對於我們的關係非常認真。

  • He and I had a discussion about whether we wanted children and both of us agreed that we don't.

    他和我討論了我們是否想要孩子,我們都同意我們不想要。

  • I think he just agreed with my decision not to more so than anything.

    我認為他就是認同我的決定,而不是更多其他原因。

  • 'Cause he respects whatever I decide to do with my body.

    因為他尊重我決定如何使用我的身體。

  • There are lots of other things that make a woman a woman. Caring and nurturing.

    還有很多其他的東西可以讓一個女人成為一個女人。關懷和養育。

  • I love teaching and the passing on of traditions and culture and knowledge, all that stuff that goes with being a woman, but I don't have to have a child to do that.

    我熱愛教學,熱愛傳統、文化和知識的傳承,這些都是作為一個女人所需要的,但我不用孩子也能做到。

  • Why can't women have that independence?

    為什麼女性不能獨立?

  • Why can't women have all these careers or have these passions that are unhindered by any sort of extra responsibility placed on them?

    為什麼女性不能擁有這些職業或擁有不受任何額外責任阻礙的激情?

  • There's something about women who don't want kids that is in a way threatening, in the same way, a happily single woman is threatening.

    因為這讓每個女人都跑掉了。

  • You wanna have kids. That's fine.

    我的意思是,至少我是這樣看的。

  • I need you to respect my life choice not to have kids. It's a two-way street.

    我需要你尊重我的選擇不要生孩子的決定,這是雙向的。

  • Women aren't allowed to necessarily make decisions in a very confident way.

    女性不能夠很有信心地做出決定。

  • We're supposed to just follow a script.

    我們應該要照著劇本走。

  • And I think because women who have chosen to be childless aren't following that script. It makes people really uncomfortable.

    而那些選擇不生育的女性沒有遵循這種劇本,這讓人們感到非常不舒服。

  • There's no one way to be a woman.

    當一名女性並不只有一種方法。

  • We all just want the best for ourselves.

    我們都只是希望為自己爭取最好的。

  • So, let's all accept that.

    讓我們都認同這觀點吧。

I love to play with children. I think they're, I think children are brilliant.

我喜歡和孩子們一起玩耍。我覺得他們很聰明。

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A2 初級 中文 孩子 女性 小孩 想要 想法 女人

有小孩才算「完整」嗎?為什麼年輕人選擇不生呢?來聽聽這五位女性講述她們不生育的原因 (Being childfree by choice: five women on why they decided not to have kids)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2023 年 04 月 23 日
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