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  • Is there anyone in your life you've known for a long time now?

    在你的生活中是否有認識很長一段時間的人?

  • Perhaps a good friend, a close sibling, or maybe even a long-term romantic partner?

    或許是好朋友、親密的手足,甚或是長期的浪漫伴侶?

  • In the sea of people who come and go in our lives, we have to admit that we can't help but long for a special someone who will finally stay in our lives, be it in a romantic or platonic way.

    在生命中來來往往的人海中,我們必須承認我們沒辦法不渴望出現一個特別的人,最終以浪漫或是柏拉圖形式永遠存在我們人生中。

  • So, how do you know if you've found someone who will be in your life forever?

    那麼,你如何能夠知道自己找到了會在生命中永遠存在的人?

  • To find out, here are eight things you should look out for.

    想要找到的話,可以注意下列八件事。

  • Number one, you feel a near-instant feeling of familiarity with them.

    第一,你會對他們產生近乎立即的熟悉感。

  • Do you feel drawn to them for some reason?

    你是否因某種原因覺得被對方吸引?

  • Whether it's platonic or romantic, when you meet the right person, the connection you make with them can be felt almost instantaneously.

    不管是柏拉圖式還是浪漫的,當你遇到對的人,你與他之間的連結幾乎可以在瞬間被感受到。

  • You may feel closer to them than with anyone else you've met.

    相比過往結識的所有人,你可能感到跟那個人特別親近。

  • And though you may not be able to put it into words, there's just something about them that feels familiar and comfortable to you.

    儘管你可能無法用言語表達,對分就是有某些特質,讓你感到既熟悉又舒適。

  • Number two, you know how to balance your relationship with other aspects of your life.

    第二,你知道如何平衡感情與生活的其它面向。

  • When you're in the fun and exciting honeymoon phase of a friendship or a relationship, you may find yourself wanting to spend all your time with them.

    當你處於友情或感情初期有趣、刺激的蜜月期時,你可能會發現自己每一刻都想跟對方一起過。

  • But what about afterwards?

    那在那個時期之後呢?

  • When you've found your forever person, you'll still love spending time with them no matter how long you've known each other already.

    當你找到人生伴侶後,不管相識多久,你都還是會喜歡跟他相處的時間。

  • And you'll even encourage one another to have just as thriving of a separate life outside of your relationship, too.

    你們也會鼓勵對方擁有這段感情以外,同樣刺激的個人生活。

  • So, while your relationship with them is important, you also know how to balance it with the other important aspects of your life, such as your family, career, passions, and so on.

    所以說,雖然你和他的感情很重要,你也知道如何將這段感情與家人、職業、愛好等其它重要面向達到平衡。

  • Number three, you're comfortable being vulnerable around them.

    第三,你可以自在地向他展現出脆弱。

  • Is it easy for you to open up to them?

    對你來說,對他敞開心扉是容易的嗎?

  • According to some of the most well-known studies on the psychology of love and family therapy, emotional intimacy is one of the most important hallmarks of a healthy, flourishing, and lasting relationship.

    根據一些最知名的愛情與家庭治療心理學研究指出,情感親密是一段健康、茁壯、持久感情最重要的特徵之一。

  • So, if you've found your forever person, then you're sure to know by the way you're so much more comfortable being vulnerable with them than you are around almost anyone else.

    所以說,如果你找到了終身伴侶,那麼相較於幾乎所有他人,你在他面前可以表現脆弱一面的相處方式,就夠更加確立這一點。

  • After all, open communication about your feelings plays a crucial role in sustaining long-term social relationships and facilitating feelings of love and closeness in one another.

    畢竟,將感受開誠布公這件事,在維繫長期社交關係並發展與對方的愛意與親密感中是一個重要因素。

  • Number four, you only have to think about what you want to say, not how you need to say it.

    第四,你只需要思考自己想說什麼,而不是應該以什麼方式說。

  • Another sure-fire sign that you've found a keeper is if most of the time, you only have to think about what you wanna say to them and not much about how to say it.

    找到可共度餘生的人的另一個明確指標是,如果你在大多時間都只需要思考想跟對方說什麼,而不太需要思考該怎麼說。

  • There's no walking on eggshells around one another, putting up walls, or fears of being misunderstood,

    你們彼此不需要凡事小心翼翼、築起心牆或懼怕被誤解,

  • all of which indicate open communication, which, as you know by now, is a key ingredient to any lasting relationship.

    那些都顯示了開放的溝通,而你到現在應該也知道,這是任何一段長久感情的關鍵要素。

  • Number five, you both fight fair.

    第五,你們都公平爭吵。

  • Now, you might be thinking that finding someone who will be in your life forever means that you never have to worry about getting into a fight with them.

    你可能正在想,找到一個會跟你共度餘生的人,表示你永遠不用再擔心會跟他吵架。

  • But that's a common misconception, and a potentially harmful one at that.

    但那是個普遍的誤解,而且可能極具傷害的。

  • After all, it's only normal to have conflicts from time to time.

    畢竟,偶爾發生衝突是再正常不過的。

  • But what really makes or breaks a relationship isn't the arguments themselves, but rather, how you handle them.

    但是真正決定一段感情會不會成功並不是爭吵本身,而是你如何應付它們。

  • If you find that you are both able to fight fairthat is, no name-calling, no blaming, no attacking each other's weaknesses,

    如果你發現你們兩人都能公平爭吵,也就是說,不辱罵、不責備、不攻擊對方弱點,

  • where you still know how to respect one another even when you can't agree, then you've definitely found a good one you shouldn't let go of.

    你們依然知道如何在不同意對方時,尊重彼此,那麼你就是遇到了一個應該好好把握,不放生的人。

  • Number six, they don't expect you to change overnight.

    第六,他們不期望你一夕之間改變。

  • Everyone struggles with their flaws and personal shortcomings, but when you find the right person, they'll inspire you to become a better version of yourself without expecting you to change overnight.

    每個人都會因為自己的缺陷和個人的不足而掙扎,但當你找到對的人,他會在不期望你一夕之間就改變的前提下,啟發你成為更好的自己。

  • They accept you just the way you are, flaws and all.

    他們接受你原本的樣貌,包括缺陷和其它的一切。

  • And, so, will be patient and supportive of who you are instead of judging or criticizing you for it.

    也因此會對真實的你展現耐心與支持,而不是指責或是批評你。

  • Even in times where you're faced with an issue and are struggling to improve, they understand that it's not easy to change and will be there to help you work through it.

    即便是你面臨一個問題並艱困地嘗試改善時,它也能夠理解改變是不容易的,所以會在你身邊協助你度過。

  • Number seven, they never let you give up on yourself.

    第七,他們從不會讓你放棄自己。

  • Do they reach out to you when they see you struggling?

    他看到你掙扎時,會對你伸出援手嗎?

  • While they won't pressure you into doing what they think is right for you, that doesn't mean that they'll just stand idly by when they think that you're hurting or struggling on your own.

    雖然他不會壓迫你做出他認為對你好的事,那並不太代表他會在認為你獨自痛苦或掙扎時冷眼旁觀。

  • Your forever person is one of your greatest cheerleaders and supporters, and they believe in you, even when you find it hard to believe in yourself.

    你的終身伴侶是你最大的啦啦隊員以及支持者之一,並在連你都難以相信自己時,給你充分信念。

  • Every time you wanna give up on something you really want or make the same old wrong choices you're always making,

    每當你想要放棄你很想要的某件事或是再次做出你一犯再犯的錯誤選擇,

  • they're there to tell you that they're better than that and that you deserve so much more.

    他們會在你身邊告訴你,你是更好的,也值得更多。

  • And number eight, being with them is an easy choice to make.

    第八,跟他在一起是再簡單不過的選擇。

  • Last, but not certainly not least, you'll know you've found someone who is going to be in your life forever if being with them is just an easy choice to make.

    最後,但一樣重要的是,如果跟某個人在一起是一個很輕易可以做出的決定,你就會知道自己找到了一個會永遠在你生命中的人。

  • Even when things aren't smooth sailing, it's still one of the simplest and surest choices you've ever made and continue to make to keep them around.

    就連一切不是一帆風順時,那也是你最過最簡單、最堅定的選擇,並持續做這個選擇讓他繼續在自己身邊。

  • You know that what the two of you share is so precious and hard to come by that you would never wanna throw it away.

    你知道你們倆共享的一切既珍貴又千載難逢,你永遠都不想拋棄它。

  • So, no matter what lies ahead, you feel a lot better just knowing you'll have them by your side.

    所以無論未來會有什麼狀況,只要知道他在你身邊,你的感覺就會好很多。

  • Did you relate to any of the signs we've mentioned?

    你有對我們提到的任一徵兆感到共鳴嗎?

  • Let us know in the comments below.

    請在留言區讓我們知道。

  • If you've found this video helpful, be sure to like, subscribe, and share this video with those who may benefit from it.

    如果你覺得這部影片有幫助,請務必點讚、訂閱,並將影片分享給可能受益的人。

  • And don't forget to hit the notification bell icon to get notified whenever Psych2Go posts a new video.

    別忘了開啟小鈴鐺,在 Psych2G0 上傳新影片時獲得通知。

  • The references and studies used in this video are added in the description below.

    影片當中引用的參考資料與研究都包含在影片下方敘述中。

  • Thanks so much for watching and see you in our next video.

    謝謝觀賞,我們下部影片見。

Is there anyone in your life you've known for a long time now?

在你的生活中是否有認識很長一段時間的人?

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