I wake up getting dressed to go nowhere, learning to be my own boss.

我醒來後穿好衣服不知去向，學習做自己的老闆。

As I go through this transition of working from home and no matter if you're off social media or not, news gets to you one way or another it's heels.

當我經歷這個在家工作的過渡期時，無論你是否關閉了社交媒體，新聞都會以這樣或那樣的方式傳給你，它是高跟鞋。

But one thing stays the same days into a watercolor blow.

但有一件事保持不變，那就是對水彩畫的打擊。

Missing home has been a big thing, worried about family and friends, their health and if they can keep their jobs, the debates are happening now and anxiety is running high.

想家是一件大事，擔心家人和朋友，擔心他們的健康，擔心他們是否能保住工作，現在正在進行辯論，焦慮感很強。

Good morning everybody.

大家早上好。

So this video is sponsored by box suit, which is actually a japanese snack subscription box.

是以，這個視頻是由box suit贊助的，這實際上是一個日本的零食訂閱盒。

The people that created this box work with 100 year old companies, family owned companies to bring you the very gourmet japanese snacks and I haven't had a japanese subscription box in a really long time.

創建這個盒子的人與有100年曆史的公司、家族企業合作，為你帶來非常美味的日本零食，我已經很久沒有吃過日本的訂閱盒子了。

So we're going to open the one that I got because I'm excited to see what's inside.

所以我們要打開我得到的那件，因為我很想看看裡面有什麼。

Just a quick look with my husband and a little bit of a taste test boxer delivers to you the taste of japan since the world is in quarantine.

只是和我的丈夫看了一眼，有點試探性的拳擊手給你送來了日本的味道，因為世界處於隔離狀態。

This might be the perfect box for you, especially if you can't travel.

這可能是適合你的完美盒子，特別是如果你不能旅行。

It has japanese snacks and tea pairings and every month you get a theme box and the first time customers get the seasons of japan boxes so you can taste every season of japan and their go to snacks.

它有日本的小吃和茶葉搭配，每個月你都會得到一個主題盒，第一次的顧客會得到日本的季節盒，所以你可以品嚐日本的每個季節和他們的小吃。

I loved how the pamphlet mentioned all the snacks in the box where they came from and allergy information, which is great for me.

我喜歡這本小冊子提到了盒子裡所有零食的來源和過敏資訊，這對我來說很好。

So let's quickly find out what's inside before we move on with this video that's going to be in my stomach.

是以，在我們繼續觀看這段將在我肚子裡的視頻之前，讓我們快速瞭解裡面的內容。

Oh my gosh!

哦，我的天哪！我的天哪

It's like a soft cookie.

這就像一塊軟餅乾。

I lived in five different places in Japan.

我在日本住過五個不同的地方。

So a lot of these snacks were super nostalgic for me because they came from everywhere in Japan.

是以，很多這些零食對我來說是超級懷舊的，因為它們來自日本的各個地方。

So I was extremely excited don't mind me.

所以我非常興奮，不要介意我。

Yes, it's like a tai yaki chocolate.

是的，這就像泰雅琪巧克力。

These are so good.

這些都是非常好的。

Looking at the origin of each snack and where it came from.

看看每一種零食的來源，以及它來自哪裡。

It was really fun for us and I loved how they had the allergy information.

這對我們來說真的很有趣，我喜歡他們的過敏資訊。

Unfortunately I couldn't eat everything but my husband was super happy To eat a lot of these snacks and have them in the house because we don't usually buy too many snacks.

不幸的是，我不能吃所有的東西，但我的丈夫超級高興，因為我們通常不買太多的零食，吃了很多這些零食，而且家裡有這些零食。

So he's going to eat all of them and I'm going to probably drink the tea and each some of the sugary snacks.

所以他要把這些東西都吃掉，而我可能要喝茶，並各自吃一些含糖的零食。

But other than that this box was full of amazing foods.

但除此之外，這個盒子裡都是令人驚奇的食物。

I feel like it's a great purchase.

我覺得這是個很好的購買方式。

Get 10% off of your authentic Japanese snack box from box to in the link in my description below go to looking at my country from afar is eye opening.

從盒子到在我下面描述的鏈接中獲得10%的正宗日本零食盒子的折扣，去從遠處看我的國家是開眼界的。

You see the bigger picture, Oh no, come back.

你看大局，哦不，回來吧。

So cute.

太可愛了。

You know when I was growing up social media wasn't a thing.

你知道當我在成長過程中，社交媒體還不是一個東西。

But now that it is, our voices are heard much louder than before.

但現在是這樣，我們的聲音比以前大得多。

Don't get me wrong.

不要誤會我的意思。

It's a good thing in order to make a change.

這是一件好事，以便做出改變。

We need to be loud.

我們需要大聲說話。

A storm happens before the comets necessary.

在彗星必要的時候，會有一場風暴發生。

Witnessing it from the outside can be harsh, but I'm grateful.

從外面看到的情況可能很殘酷，但我很感激。

I can stay connected to my family during this tough time with the use of technology were at sky tree right now.

在這個艱難的時期，我可以通過使用技術與我的家人保持聯繫，現在就在天空樹。

There's a shopping center called Solo and we're actually looking for a place to eat.

有一個叫Solo的購物中心，我們實際上是在找一個吃飯的地方。

It looks so good.

它看起來很好。

I run the talent.

我經營人才。

We're talking about the situation of the coronavirus right now.

我們現在正在談論冠狀病毒的情況。

And that was telling, Well, I kind of agree though because there's no restrictions here.

這句話很有說服力，嗯，我有點同意，因為這裡沒有限制。

They're not even doing social distancing anymore places rarely.

他們甚至不做社會疏導了的地方很少。

Like I actually noticed it's not really reinforced.

就像我實際上注意到它並沒有真正得到加強。

There's actually like zero restrictions here.

實際上，這裡的限制是零。

I mean, even look at Halloween, Halloween was chaos.

我的意思是，甚至看看萬聖節，萬聖節是混亂的。

People are out just to be out.

人們出去就是為了出去。

There were no costume, Nobody was wearing a single costume.

沒有服裝，沒有人穿著單一的服裝。

There may be a few people that were costumes, but everybody was just about to be out.

可能有幾個人是服裝，但每個人都是剛要出來的。

As for the recent strong emotions, I've been feeling out of nowhere.

至於最近的強烈情緒，我一直有種不知從何而來的感覺。

It goes deeper than just the virus and debates, which I will get to in this video in a moment.

它比病毒和辯論更深入，我將在這段視頻中稍後談到。

But when it comes to feeling strong emotions like sadness or fear, that's okay, it comes in waves living abroad.

但是，當談到感到強烈的情緒，如悲傷或恐懼時，沒關係，在國外生活，它是一波接一波的。

Oh my gosh, look like I'm crying.

哦，我的天哪，看起來像我在哭。

I'm very emotional today.

我今天非常激動。

There's just a lot going on.

只是發生了很多事情。

And the pandemic is I think making us all feel a little off.

而這種大流行病我想讓我們都覺得有點不對勁。

I need some fresh air and we need to explore.

我需要一些新鮮空氣，我們需要探索。

I like walking and seeing new things and I think that that'll help my mood a little bit.

我喜歡走路，喜歡看新的東西，我想這對我的情緒會有一點幫助。

Our emotions are messengers of the soul.

我們的情緒是靈魂的信使。

They tell us important information in order to make shifts in our lives, so don't suppress them listen to them.

它們告訴我們重要的資訊，以便在我們的生活中進行轉變，所以不要壓制它們，傾聽它們。

Would you like a grilled eggplant key chain?

你想要一個烤茄子鑰匙鏈嗎？

How about ginger, This is why you can't lose weight in Japan.

姜怎麼樣，這就是為什麼你在日本不能減肥的原因。

I found me, I found why am I still here?

我找到了自己，我找到了為什麼我還在這裡？

Yep.

是的。

I used to model these face masks sold worldwide during my time in Nagoya.

我在名古屋的時候，曾經為這些在全球範圍內銷售的面罩做模特。

They still seem to use my face in every single ad and I still have footage from those days and it was a fun experience, but really, really exhausting and tedious.

他們似乎仍然在每個廣告中使用我的臉，我仍然有那些日子的錄像，這是一個有趣的經歷，但真的非常累，非常乏味。

They had to cut the masks because my face was way too small and I had to stand very, very still.

他們不得不剪掉面具，因為我的臉太小了，而且我必須站得非常、非常穩。

It wasn't a typical modeling job, but it was my first one.

這不是一份典型的模特工作，但這是我的第一份工作。

So I did it for the experience and guess what?

所以我是為了體驗而做的，你猜怎麼著？

The masks are still everywhere in Japan and a very good gift for friends and family.

這種面具在日本仍然隨處可見，是送給朋友和家人的非常好的禮物。

They even have kids ones too.

他們甚至還有兒童的。

America is not my home.

美國不是我的家。

I realized that the other day Japan is not my home either.

有一天我意識到，日本也不是我的家。

When I feel homesick, I question that this is even homesickness or not because it's so confusing.

當我感到想家時，我懷疑這到底是不是想家，因為它是如此的混亂。

Not lots of people are crazy.

不是很多人都是瘋子。

You see when you live in another country for so so long, you build a life and that life becomes your home, but it's not really your home or is it confusing.

你看，當你在另一個國家生活了這麼久，你建立了一種生活，這種生活成為你的家，但它並不是你真正的家，或者說它是混亂的。

I know recently I've been itching to visit friends and family back home, but I can't and I think that the restriction of that brings about this homesickness feeling which does happen from time to time for every foreigner that lives here, it's no new feeling.

我知道最近我很想回家看望朋友和家人，但我不能，我認為這種限制帶來了這種想家的感覺，這對每一個生活在這裡的外國人來說確實時有發生，這不是什麼新鮮的感覺。

But what I mean is the last time I went back home I felt anxious and I felt far from home meaning Japan, I felt homesick for Japan, I'd wake up in my own bed and I'd panic, where am I?

但我的意思是，上次我回國時，我感到很焦慮，我覺得離家很遠，也就是日本，我覺得很想家，我在自己的床上醒來時，會很恐慌，我在哪裡？

So what I'm saying is I didn't even know which home was my home moment of truth.

所以我想說的是，我甚至不知道哪個家是我的家的真相時刻。

I think it has English marriage.

我認為它有英國婚姻。

Bad traveled back.

糟糕的旅行回來了。

I blame 2020, it's all your fault, it's all your fault doing it one more time.

我責備2020年，這都是你的錯，都是你的錯，再做一次。

This is probably taboo, but it was his money.

這可能是禁忌，但這是他的錢。

So this time it's mine that won't come out, this is a bad sign, it's not coming out Jonah, good fortune.

所以這次是我的不出來，這是個不好的徵兆，不出來了約拿，好運氣。

The universe heard me and I did it a second time and because I did that and didn't give up, I wasn't accepting the bad fortune, I was like no I can't accept this in my life and it happened.

宇宙聽到了我的聲音，我做了第二次，因為我這樣做了，沒有放棄，我沒有接受壞運氣，我想不，我不能在我的生活中接受這個，它發生了。

I manifested it.

我表現了它。

You gotta believe in yourself, here's what I concluded home is your relationship with yourself when you know and understand yourself and who you are home can be anywhere.

你要相信自己，我的結論是：家是你與自己的關係，當你認識和了解自己和你是誰時，家可以是任何地方。

And once I reminded myself this, I felt a sense of peace and homesickness doesn't mean you don't know who you are or you want to go home necessarily.

而一旦我提醒自己這一點，我就感到一種平靜，思鄉並不意味著你不知道自己是誰，也不意味著你一定想回家。

It means we have a need, the feeling of homesickness is telling us we have a need for connection.

這意味著我們有一種需要，思鄉的感覺在告訴我們，我們有一種聯繫的需要。

I realize my lack of connection and spending time with friends here and the family I built in Japan has led me to feel this way.

我意識到我缺乏聯繫，沒有花時間與這裡的朋友和我在日本建立的家庭相處，導致我有這種感覺。

So this sunday I scheduled time with friends and with that shift, the feeling of homesickness and not feeling like I belong anywhere will slowly begin to fade.

是以，這個星期天我安排了與朋友們在一起的時間，隨著這一轉變，思鄉和不屬於任何地方的感覺將慢慢開始消退。

Mm curry lunch.

嗯，咖哩午餐。

What an amazing husband, we are going to a cafe to work and get some stuff done because today is a public holiday, it's probably gonna be so busy, but it's a rainy cloudy day, so we'll see what happens.

多麼了不起的丈夫啊！我們要去一家咖啡館工作，做一些事情，因為今天是公共假期，可能會很忙，但今天是陰雨天，所以我們要看看情況。

I don't know, my eyes look so blue.

我不知道，我的眼睛看起來很藍。

Whoa, this is the first time that I'm working in a cafe in a really long time and I'm really excited and I feel like I'm gonna get a lot of work done, getting out of the house, getting ready has been tough for me.

哇，這是我很長時間以來第一次在咖啡館工作，我真的很興奮，我覺得我會完成很多工作，走出家門，做好準備對我來說很困難。

Once I get into a flow with my projects, I forget to take breaks because well I don't want to, I'm gonna flow and having too much fun and this new life of working from home is very different from me and I'm still learning, but reality is my health part of my life by is a little bit out of balance and being aware of what's out of balance is going to allow me to take action.

一旦我進入我的項目的流程，我就會忘記休息，因為我不想休息，我正在流程中，有太多的樂趣，這種在家工作的新生活與我非常不同，我仍然在學習，但現實是我的健康部分的生活有點失衡，意識到什麼是失衡的，將使我能夠採取行動。

This is what I talked about in my current program that I have been working on for quite a while now.

這就是我在目前的計劃中談到的，我已經在這個計劃中工作了很長時間。

How dare you throw that crust away?

你怎麼敢把那塊麵包皮扔掉？

How dare you?

你怎麼敢？

That's the best part.

這是最精彩的部分。

It's not for dog.

這不是為狗準備的。

The reality is, your life will always be out of balance somewhere, especially when you're working hard on your dreams.

現實是，你的生活總會在某個地方失去平衡，特別是當你為你的夢想努力工作時。

But it's up to you to be aware of that and bounced back.

但這取決於你是否能意識到這一點並反彈回來。

Okay, we're heading home, we're going grocery shopping really late because I don't feel like going outside tomorrow so I can start eating healthy and not eating all these, these scarves.

好了，我們要回家了，我們要去買菜，真的很晚了，因為我覺得明天不想出去，所以我可以開始吃得健康，不要吃所有這些，這些圍巾。

Ever since I started feeling better with my stomach and everything I've been eating and eating because I missed all the foods I've been restricting myself from.

自從我開始覺得我的胃和一切都好了之後，我一直在吃吃吃，因為我想念所有我一直限制自己的食物。

I'm suffering the consequences of gaining weight.

我正在承受發胖的後果。

Don't go in there is coronavirus season I guess, but I guess probably nobody's used this when I came to Japan for the first time.

不要去那裡是冠狀病毒的季節，我猜，但我猜可能沒有人使用這個，當我第一次來到日本。

I had a telephone card, I didn't have a cell phone.

我有一張電話卡，我沒有手機。

I don't have anything.

我什麼都沒有。

I had to call my parents using that and I also had traveler's checks.

我不得不用這個給我的父母打電話，我也有旅行支票。

I didn't have any credit cards or anything knowing that even though starting a brand in business for me right now is taking up a lot of learning growth and time.

我沒有任何信用卡或任何東西，知道即使現在開始一個品牌的業務對我來說是佔用了大量的學習成長和時間。

I know that when I'm more familiar with this life, the other parts of my life will be in balance again.

我知道，當我更熟悉這種生活時，我生命中的其他部分將再次達到平衡。

As long as I have a resilient mind and consistent hears the word again, awareness.

只要我有一顆堅韌不拔的心，並且始終如一地再次聽到這個詞，意識。

Mhm, mm Yeah, mm hmm.

嗯，嗯 是的，嗯嗯。

Mhm.

嗯。

So I'm on a little bit of a walk right now and I just wanted to say that recently I have been not really like that feeling a little bit disconnected I guess and a lot of people are wondering like aren't you homesick?

所以我現在正在散步，我只想說，最近我一直不太喜歡那種感覺，我想有點脫節，很多人都想知道，比如你是不是想家？

You've been living in Japan for So so long homesickness happens no matter how long you've lived in a country, usually homesickness is kind of that need for connection.

你已經在日本生活了這麼久，無論你在一個國家生活了多久，想家的感覺都會發生，通常想家是那種需要聯繫的感覺。

You have to listen to your needs because there are many different needs that occur within you and if you ignore those needs then you just live a very unbalanced unhealthy life.

你必須傾聽你的需求，因為你內心有許多不同的需求，如果你忽視了這些需求，那麼你就只能過著非常不平衡的不健康的生活。

I don't know like I've just been choking up a lot, feeling a little bit down.

我不知道，就像我剛剛被嗆得很厲害，感覺有點低落。

I think we all have, we've all been there.

我想我們都有，我們都有過這樣的經歷。

But at the same time I went back to America and I always felt very, not like I was at home, I didn't feel like America was my home.

但與此同時，我回到美國，我總是覺得非常，不像是在家裡，我不覺得美國是我的家。

I had a lot of reverse culture shock and I have a whole video about that.

我有很多反向文化衝擊，我有一整段關於這個的視頻。

You want to watch it down below.

你想在下面觀看。

I talked about all of my reverse culture shock.

我談到了我所有的反向文化衝擊。

So I'm gonna sit here really quick at this little park in the neighborhood.

是以，我將在附近的這個小公園裡快速地坐在這裡。

But yeah, so when I went back I just didn't feel like it was my home.

但是，是的，所以當我回去的時候，我只是覺得那不是我的家。

So at the same time, I'm homesick here, but then if I went back to the States, I wouldn't feel like I'm at home there either.

所以在同一時間，我在這裡想家，但如果我回到美國，我也不會覺得我在那裡有家的感覺。

So very different.

所以非常不同。

It's very, I don't know, I don't know how to explain it, but feeling very emotional, and I think it's because of 2020 and I think it's because of a lot of change and transition in my own life and everybody's lives, and just all of the craziness that has been going on in the States and around the world today is Election Day.

這非常，我不知道，我不知道如何解釋，但感覺非常情緒化，我認為這是因為2020年，我認為這是因為我自己的生活和每個人的生活中的許多變化和過渡，以及今天是選舉日，在美國和世界各地發生的所有瘋狂的事情。

There's a lot of tension.

有很多的緊張。

Yeah, it's just been a lot of emotion and yeah, so I'm just gonna walk and then I'm going to go get a few things at the store and then head back home and do some more work right now.

是的，它只是有很多情緒，是的，所以我只是要走走，然後我要去商店買點東西，然後回家，現在再做一些工作。

My days are busy and life goes on Japan is my home indefinitely, and my identity as an american still lives within me, and I am proud.

我的日子很忙，生活還在繼續，日本是我的家，沒有期限，而我作為美國人的身份仍然存在於我的內心，我很自豪。

I am working on module five and finalizing all the worksheets and things like that.

我正在進行第五單元的工作，並最終確定所有工作表和類似的東西。

This week has been a lot.

這周的事情很多。

I think having this new chapter in my life where I'm not commuting to work and I'm not going anywhere, I don't have a schedule, I have to be my own boss, and I have to be able to create systems, which is ironically I'm talking about that in module five, which is what I'm working on now, and it's got me thinking about my own life and the transition that I'm going through right now and throughout your entire life, you're going to be going through new transitions and new chapters in your life and nothing's going to ever be perfect, you're not going to get to a perfect place in your life, it's all about awareness and all about resilience, started to become more aware of.

我認為在我生命中的這個新篇章裡，我不再通勤上班，我不會去任何地方，我沒有時間表，我必須自己當老闆，我必須能夠創建系統，具有諷刺意味的是，我在第五單元中談到了這一點，這是我現在正在做的事情。這讓我想到了我自己的生活和我現在正在經歷的過渡，在你的整個生命中，你將經歷新的過渡和你生命中的新篇章，沒有什麼會是完美的，你不會到達你生命中完美的地方，這是所有關於意識和所有關於復原力，開始變得更加清楚。

I don't have a system for myself, so I'm saying yes to too many things and I'm taking on too many projects because I'm so excited About all the things that I can do now, I'm seeing these patterns in myself that I didn't see before when I quit my job.

我沒有為自己建立一個系統，所以我對太多的事情說 "是"，我承擔了太多的項目，因為我對現在能做的所有事情感到非常興奮，我在自己身上看到了這些模式，這些模式是我以前辭職時沒有看到的。

Now, I'm a little bit out of balance because you don't have that cut off because nobody is telling, you know, Kelly, you can't do that.

現在，我有點不平衡了，因為你沒有那個切口，因為沒有人告訴，你知道，凱利，你不能這樣做。

I'm using the Kaizen method and everything to narrow down my goals and what I need to do, and I am crossing off the things on my list that don't need to be done right now, it's all very exciting work and my course is doing so well, we have over 30 students now and it's just been amazing and the group is just so supportive and kind and we hold space for each other and that's what's very important.

我正在使用Kaizen方法和所有的東西來縮小我的目標和我需要做的事情，我正在劃掉清單上現在不需要做的事情，這都是非常令人興奮的工作，我的課程做得非常好，我們現在有30多個學生，這實在是太神奇了，這個團體就是這麼支持和善良，我們為彼此保留空間，這才是非常重要的。

A lot of you guys are moving to Japan and it's all very positive stress, I need to have systems in place if I want to continue doing this alone and by myself for those of you wanting to move abroad, work on yourself, understand who you are and develop a mindset that you trust.

你們很多人要搬到日本，這都是非常積極的壓力，如果我想繼續獨自一人做這件事，我需要有相應的系統，對於那些想出國的人來說，要在自己身上下功夫，瞭解自己是誰，培養自己信任的心態。

And I promise you you'll bounce back during the tough times and uncover the answers to many of the ups and downs living abroad or just in life in general.

我向你保證，你會在困難時期反彈，並揭開生活在國外或一般生活中的許多起伏的答案。

Thank you guys for watching.

謝謝你們的觀看。

Give this video a like and subscribe and comment down below what you do whenever you feel homesick.

給這個視頻點個贊，訂閱一下，並在下面評論你每當想家的時候會做什麼。

Also let me know how you're doing during this time.

也讓我知道你在這段時間的情況。

I know it's tough, but hang in there, you're doing great.

我知道這很艱難，但要堅持下去，你做得很好。

I will see you guys in the next video.

我將在下一個視頻中看到你們。

Mhm.

嗯。