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  • Here's the deal: Everyone is rejected at some point, and it hurts...

    是這樣的:每個人被拒絕的時候,都會感到受傷⋯⋯

  • Badly!

    傷得很重!

  • I mean, look, Billy Joel has built his whole career on singing about rejection.

    我的意思是,看看比利喬唱有關被拒絕的歌,而建立起的歌唱事業。

  • And feeling studies have shown that rejection is really not that far removed from actual physical pain.

    而且情感研究學顯示,被拒絕的感覺與身體上的痛苦其實沒差多少。

  • Today on WellCast, we took our viewer's suggestion.

    今天,WellCast 聽取了觀眾的建議。

  • Thanks for the awesome idea, Ken Jackson!

    Ken Jackson 謝謝你的好主意啦!

  • Today, we're going to be looking into social rejection.

    今天我們要調查社交上的拒絕。

  • We're gonna examine why being suddenly shunned from a group of peers or friends is damaging your psyche.

    我們要調查為什麼遭到同儕或朋友突然地迴避會使你心靈受創。

  • And give you our 3-step take-back-your-life-method for remaining healthy, happy, and in control.

    然後我們會教你三步驟 「找回生命意義」的方法,讓你保持健康、快樂並掌握人生。

  • If you're upset after some form of social rejection, say your friends have stopped talking to you or your coworkers are giving you the cold shoulder, that's totally normal.

    如果你因人際互動上受到排斥而心煩意亂,例如:你的朋友不跟你說話了,或是同事故意冷落你,那都很正常。

  • Put simply, a negative reaction to social exclusion, is ingrained in humans because being part of a social community has so many perks.

    簡單來說,對社會排斥的負面反應深深烙印在我們腦中,因為成為社會的一份子總有許多好處。

  • Humans are hardwired to feel pain when excluded.

    人們天生就會因不被別人接納而感到痛苦。

  • It's how we stay alive, and it's not just psychological pain either.

    這就是人類生存的方式,而這種痛苦不只是心理上的。

  • Take a 2003 study done by neuroscientists at UCLA.

    以加州大學洛杉磯分校 2003 年神經學家所做的研究來說。

  • These researchers simulated social exclusion with the computer game in which the participants played catch with what they believed to be other humans.

    研究者用電腦遊戲模擬社會排斥,讓參與者扮演遊戲中的角色,與他們以為也是人類的玩家一起玩傳接球。

  • When this virtual game of catch became a virtual game of monkey in the middle,

    當虛擬接球遊戲變成「你丟不給我接」遊戲時,

  • these participants who were hooked up to an MRI exhibited activity in the section of the brain that's usually associated with dire physical pain.

    與受試者連接的核磁共振儀顯示,他們的腦部活躍區塊與人類身體經歷劇烈疼痛時相同。

  • So science has told us what we basically already know: It really really hurts to be excluded.

    所以科學表明了我們已經知道的事:被孤立是真的非常非常痛苦。

  • But like we said, being rejected?

    但像我們所說的,被拒絕呢?

  • Well, that's a part of life.

    嗯,那是生活的一部份。

  • So what do we do?

    那我們該怎麼做呢?

  • How do we stop from feeling so crummy when we're left out?

    被排除在外時,要怎麼做才不會感覺那麼糟?

  • The best way to counter the pain of rejection is to seize control in deciding how to react to it.

    處理被拒絕的痛苦最好的方式,就是掌握控制權。

  • And this brings us to our WellCast exercise.

    而這就帶我們來到 WellCast 的練習啦!

  • Taking back your life triathlon.

    回憶一下你的人生鐵人三項運動。

  • Step 1: Beef up your self-esteem!

    第一步:提升自尊心!

  • Studies have shown that when cut-off from a social group, people with low self-esteem can sink into physical sickness, depression, and a storm of other maladies.

    研究顯示,與社交群體斷絕關係後,低自尊的人們容易生病、沮喪或產生其他一堆疾病。

  • The clear fix is to build your self-esteem right now!

    最好的處理辦法就是現在提升自尊心!

  • Easier said than done, we know!

    我知道說比做簡單。

  • And it's hard to stay away from negative irrational thoughts.

    遠離不理性的負面想法很難。

  • But try to think about your situation in a logical rather than emotional manner.

    但試著用邏輯思考,而不是感情用事。

  • In your WellCast journal; write down your three biggest accomplishments in life.

    在 WellCast 日誌上,寫下你生命中的三大成就。

  • The goal here is to not define yourself by one upsetting event but learn to define yourself by your accomplishments, your life experience.

    不要因一件糟糕的事就定義自己,學著以自己的成就、經歷來看待自己。

  • Look at that list!

    看看那個清單!

  • Believe in who you are.

    相信自己。

  • And know your self-worth.

    要知道自己是有價值的人。

  • Accomplishments are no easy feat.

    達成成就絕非易事。

  • Seriously!

    真的!

  • And trust me, you can rise above all of this negativity.

    相信我,你可以克服所有負面想法。

  • Step 2: Treat your injuries!

    第二步:好好養傷!

  • The emotional pain you're feeling right now is almost indistinguishable from physical pain in your brain.

    腦袋很難區分情緒上的痛苦和身體上的痛苦。

  • So why not treat it as such?

    所以為什麼不以相同方式對待他們?

  • You're in recovery.

    你正在恢復中。

  • And scientists say that it’s crucial to maintain good physical health during times of emotional stress.

    科學家也表明,有情緒壓力時,最好保持身體健康。

  • Work on getting an hour more of sleep a night.

    晚上提前一小時睡覺。

  • Map out your meals ahead of time, and make sure you're getting fruits and vegetables.

    提前安排三餐的計畫,確定有攝取蔬菜水果。

  • Exercise 30 minutes a day.

    一天運動三十分鐘。

  • It'll release endorphins in your brain which will promote a sense of well-being.

    這些都可以釋放腦內啡,並提升幸福感。

  • The healthier you stay, the higher your mood will peak, we promise.

    身體越健康,就會越幸福,相信我。

  • Step 3: Get proactive!

    第三步:主動點!

  • Think of this as a great opportunity to make new friends that you have more in common with.

    把這想成結交志同道合朋友的機會。

  • Look for new social circles.

    找個新的社交圈吧!

  • Join clubs, team sports, youth groups.

    參加俱樂部、團體運動或青年團體。

  • Go after anything that piques your interest.

    追求任何提起你興趣的事。

  • Use an excuse to practice that new-found self-confidence, and really go all-out to meet new people.

    找個理由練習新找到的自信心,離開自己的世界去見新朋友,

  • Odds are, you'll find a group of friends with whom you will fit right in.

    你很有機會找到一群適合你的朋友。

  • Alright, let's recap!

    好啦,來複習一遍吧!

  • By taking control of your life – a control you thought you lost when you were socially rejected.

    掌握你的人——當覺得被社會拒絕時,控制自己的想法。

  • You're less likely to be emotionally bogged down by what happened.

    這樣比較不會因所發生的事陷入情緒泥沼。

  • You can do that by working to raise your self-esteem, taking care of yourself physically, and reaching out to form new friend groups.

    想控制自己的想法,你可以提升自尊、好好照顧自己的身體,然後結交新朋友。

  • Did these tips work?

    這些小撇步對你有幫助嗎?

  • Tweet us @watchwellcast.

    用推特 @watchWellCast 告訴我們。

  • Email us at watchwellcast@gmail.com or leave a comment down below.

    也可以寄信到 [email protected] 或是在影片底下留言。

  • We'll see you next time.

    我們下次見。

Here's the deal: Everyone is rejected at some point, and it hurts...

是這樣的:每個人被拒絕的時候,都會感到受傷⋯⋯

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被拒絕了怎麼辦 (Dealing With Rejection)

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    Go Tutor 發佈於 2022 年 02 月 03 日
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