I don't like the pity party.

我不喜歡憐憫聚會。

I don't like talking about when I don't feel too well.

我不喜歡談論我感覺不是很好的時候。

I don't know, I am a little nervous just being kind of open about like what I struggle with and like making it known to other people is a bit nerve wracking four.

我不知道，我有點緊張，只是對我掙扎的東西有點公開，就像讓別人知道，有點傷腦筋。

I remember being really young, I'd say like 89 10 like around that time and I remember having shortness of breath and going to my mom and telling her that in hindsight.

我記得當時真的很年輕，我說像89年10月左右，我記得有呼吸急促，去找我媽媽，事後告訴她。

Now I know that that was obviously anxiety I think being overworked and like being in the situation that I'm in now is kind of what like set it out of control in a way.

現在我知道那顯然是焦慮，我認為過度勞累和像我現在這樣的情況是一種，就像在某種程度上使它失去了控制。

I've had times where I feel like I need to be rushed to the hospital because I'm I think that like my heart's failing and I can't breathe and I need like someone to like help me sometimes I think I'm dying sometimes parts of my body will go numb and it can be really yeah intense and scary.

我也有過這樣的時候，我覺得我需要被送往醫院，因為我覺得我的心臟正在衰竭，我無法呼吸，我需要有人來幫助我，有時我覺得我快死了，有時我身體的一部分會麻木，這可能真的是很緊張和可怕的。

I mean there is going to be those people that say like okay what does she have to worry about?

我的意思是，會有一些人說，好吧，她有什麼可擔心的？

What does she have to be anxious about?

她有什麼可焦慮的呢？

And I'll never sit here and say that I'm not fortunate.

而我永遠不會坐在這裡說我不幸運。

I know I live a very privileged, amazing lifestyle.

我知道我的生活方式非常優越，令人驚歎。

Um a very blessed girl.

嗯，一個非常有福氣的女孩。

I still have one of these, you know what I mean?

我仍然有一個這樣的東西，你知道我的意思嗎？

That thing up there sometimes like doesn't always, I don't know, it's not always like happy and it's not always connecting and it's I'm still a human being at the end of the day and no matter what someone has or doesn't have it doesn't mean that they don't have real life feelings and emotions.

上面那個東西有時像並不總是，我不知道，它並不總是像快樂的，它並不總是連接的，它是我在一天結束時仍然是一個人，無論某人擁有或不擁有什麼，並不意味著他們沒有真實的生活感受和情感。

A psychologist in private practice here in Los Angeles.

一位在洛杉磯這裡從事私人執業的心理學家。

I work with people with a wide like sort of so what you call it, Generalists, so different people bring in different stuff.

我和人們一起工作，有一個廣泛的像你所說的那樣的通才，所以不同的人帶來不同的東西。

But the one thing I would say every single individual that I've ever worked with has brought in is anxiety.

但我想說的是，與我合作過的每一個人都帶來了焦慮。

One of the most important things I think is to de stigmatize all mental health issues, particularly anxiety, because a lot of people think they're alone with this.

我認為最重要的事情之一是消除對所有心理健康問題的汙名化，特別是焦慮，因為很多人認為他們是獨自面對這個問題。

Like you kind of said everyone I think suffers from, even if it's just a minimal amount of anxiety, but it is something when someone's like, oh my God, I have anxiety about this, like, almost using the term loosely, I know what that feels like, and like you're using that term lightly and I'm just like, I've got to remember anxieties on a continuum right at the milder end, it's probably what these people are saying, I'm feeling the society, but they're getting through the day.

就像你說的那種每個人我認為都會遭受，即使它只是一個最小量的焦慮，但它是當某人的喜歡，哦，我的上帝，我對這個有焦慮，像，幾乎使用鬆散的術語，我知道那是什麼感覺，就像你在使用這個術語輕，我只是想，我得記住焦慮在一個連續體上就在較溫和的一端，它可能是這些人說，我感覺社會，但他們正在度過一天。

But once it jumps the line and there's a point at which anxiety gets in the way it makes people more uncomfortable at work.

但是，一旦它跳過界限，有一個點，焦慮的方式，它使人們在工作中更加不舒服。

It makes people more uncomfortable in their relationships.

它使人們在關係中更加不自在。

It makes people more uncomfortable out of the house.

這讓人們在外面更不自在。

Right?

對嗎？

That actually just as soon stay home, then deal with the big unknown and they're physically uncomfortable, their hearts racing.

這實際上就像呆在家裡一樣，然後處理大的未知數，他們身體不舒服，他們的心在狂跳。

I feel like they're crawling out of their own skin, They feel sick a lot.

我覺得他們就像從自己的皮膚裡爬出來一樣，他們經常感到不適。

Everything scary, right?

一切都很嚇人，對嗎？

And when we get to that point, we call it clinically significant anxiety.

而當我們達到這一點時，我們稱之為臨床意義上的焦慮。

It's gotta Yeah.

它必須是的。

Okay.

好的。

Well now, I know it sounds like social anxiety is something you had even before the pandemic before I was really overwhelmed.

現在好了，我知道聽起來社會焦慮症是你的東西，甚至在大流行之前，我真的被壓倒了。

Really overworked.

真的過度勞累了。

I was always around people and I kind of got really overwhelmed with all of that.

我總是與人打交道，我有點被所有這些事壓倒了。

To the point where I was like, I need to be alone now.

到了我想，我現在需要獨處的地步。

It's more like, okay, we we've all been super isolated, where I'm almost like so used to that, but now that things are slowly opening up if I go to a dinner or if I see a few more of my friends that I'm used to seeing throughout this last year, that gives me anxiety, I'm going to give you an analogy.

它更像是，好吧，我們我們都是超級孤立的，在這裡我幾乎是如此的習慣，但是現在事情慢慢的開放了，如果我去參加一個晚宴，或者如果我看到更多的朋友，在過去的這一年裡我習慣於看到他們，這讓我感到焦慮，我要給你一個比喻。

Have you ever been scuba diving?

你有過水肺潛水的經歷嗎？

No, I've been snooping diving, okay are similar.

不，我一直在窺探潛水，還好是類似的。

So we'll build up on that a little bit because when you scuba dive, if you come up too fast, like you come from 20 I know that you could actually get really sick and that's called the bends.

是以，我們將在此基礎上繼續努力，因為當你潛水時，如果你上來的速度太快，比如你從20歲開始，我知道你實際上可能真的會生病，這就叫彎腰。

And psychology is similar.

而心理學也是如此。

Well from this pandemic, if we go too quickly from being locked in to throwing ourselves right back out there, especially for people with anxiety, they're going to kind of get the psychological bends and they're really going to kind of get rattled telling yourself into to ease yourself into it.

從這個大流行病來看，如果我們太快地從被鎖在裡面到把自己扔到外面，特別是對有焦慮症的人來說，他們會有一種心理上的彎曲，他們真的會有點被激怒，告訴自己要放鬆自己。

We're all learning are skills again, we lost.

我們都在重新學習技能，我們輸了。

You know, it's crazy.

你知道，這很瘋狂。

Social anxiety has a certain look to it, and people work socially anxious classically are afraid that not only are people looking at them that they're criticizing their judging them and that the socially anxious person feels like they're doing judge Herbal things, or that they're making other people uncomfortable merely by being there.

社交焦慮有一定的外觀，人們在工作中社交焦慮的經典做法是害怕人們不僅在看他們，而且在責備他們的評判他們，社交焦慮的人覺得他們在做法官草藥的事情，或者他們僅僅因為在那裡而使其他人感到不舒服。

Like these people are uncomfortable because I'm so awkward.

就像這些人因為我太笨拙而感到不自在。

What happens is over time, because that moment is so hard, even before the person gets into the situation, their heart is racing, they feel sick.

發生的情況是隨著時間的推移，因為那一刻是如此艱難，甚至在當事人進入狀況之前，他們的心臟就在狂跳，他們感到噁心。

The whole experience of even being with people feel so aversive.

甚至與人相處的整個經歷都感到如此厭惡。

It's easier to just say no I'm not.

說 "不，我沒有 "更容易。

And this is all strictly like mental, right?

而這都是嚴格意義上的心理，對嗎？

It's just everything that your brain is, like, it's all you're just going down a rabbit hole, you're going down a rabbit hole.

這只是你的大腦的一切，就像，它是所有你只是去了一個兔子洞，你去了一個兔子洞。

Does it feel so physical why I ask you that is like, so I've literally gone to doctors because that's how bad it gets for me to where I'm like, something's literally wrong, correct panic attacks are the sort of the brick of every anxiety disorder or anxiety experience we see it's all a miscommunication in the brain, Everything gets ramped up, its taking the signals from here, change this, you change this.

我為什麼問你這個問題，因為我真的去看醫生了，因為這對我來說太糟糕了，我想，真的有什麼問題，正確的驚恐發作是每一個焦慮症或焦慮經驗的磚頭，我們看到它都是大腦中的錯誤溝通，一切都被提升了，它從這裡獲得信號，改變這個，你改變這個。

I'm also a hipaa contract, which I don't know if that has any relation to like it's the cousin of anxiety or something, but I'm like a massive hypochondriacs, So, and that's also something that has been a thing since I was really, little, people who are anxious are always monitoring their bodies.

我也是一個HIPAA合同，我不知道這是否與焦慮的表妹或其他東西有任何關係，但我就像一個巨大的疑病症患者，所以，這也是自從我真的，小，焦慮的人總是在監測他們的身體。

It's almost like a Roomba, you're always sort of like wandering around and vacuuming, vacuuming all these thoughts in your body.

這幾乎就像一個Roomba，你總是有點像四處遊蕩和吸塵，把你身體裡的這些想法都吸走。

And so if you even feel like a tiny headache, oh my God, I have I have a tumor in my brain, you know, or have some lung disease, I have to get checked out.

是以，如果你甚至感覺到微小的頭痛，哦，我的上帝，我有我的大腦中有一個腫瘤，你知道，或有一些肺部疾病，我必須得到檢查。

Anxiety is like a magnifying glass and it magnifies only the bad things every little ping every like this.

焦慮就像一個放大鏡，它只放大不好的東西，每一個小平都是這樣。

And so in essence, what we're trying to just take that magnifying glass and put it to being a regular lens, because it especially physical sensations, because anxiety is such a physical disorder.

是以在本質上，我們試圖只是把那個放大鏡，把它變成一個普通的鏡頭，因為它特別是身體感覺，因為焦慮是這樣一種身體障礙。

And so that's one thing I always want to tell people is that they go together and that as the anxiety starts getting pulled away.

是以，這是我一直想告訴人們的一件事，就是它們是一起的，而且隨著焦慮開始被拉開。

Those hypochondriacal thoughts also start coming down because they're a nuisance.

那些疑病症的想法也開始下降，因為它們是一種騷擾。

So I'm glad you mentioned that, because that's really an important thing for people to literally I'm sometimes I'm bad at putting my thoughts into words you're doing for me.

所以我很高興你提到這一點，因為這對人們來說真的是一件很重要的事情，從字面上看，我有時不善於把我的想法變成文字，你為我做到了。

So these are some um written in questions from followers and viewers.

是以，這些是一些嗯寫在追隨者和觀眾的問題。

The first question, how do you open up to people about social anxiety?

第一個問題，你如何向人們公開社交焦慮的情況？

Tell your nearest and dearest like practice talk, Having a conversation with the people you feel safest with, people will say, oh, I did not know that and thank you for telling me because I won't push, I can support you.

告訴你最親近的人，就像練習談話一樣，與你感到最安全的人進行談話，人們會說，哦，我不知道，謝謝你告訴我，因為我不會逼你，我可以支持你。

Can.

可以。

Now I'm aware.

現在我知道了。

Okay, next question.

好的，下一個問題。

How should I handle anxiety over a loved one who isn't being cautious during cope and wow, I feel this, I've heard this from so many people.

我應該如何處理對所愛的人的焦慮，他在應對過程中不謹慎，哇，我感覺到了這一點，我從許多人那裡聽到了這一點。

If you have a healthy relationship, you can explain your point of view and say, listen, this is concerning me for all these reasons.

如果你有一個健康的關係，你可以解釋你的觀點並說，聽著，這與我有關，因為所有這些原因。

Okay, if the person is still not meeting you halfway, like there really are being difficult.

好吧，如果這個人仍然沒有滿足你的要求，就像真的有困難。

I talk about realistic expectations.

我談的是現實的期望。

You're probably not going to get them to be mask wearing sanitizer doing and washing friend.

你可能不會讓他們成為戴口罩的消毒員做和洗的朋友。

Then all you can do is keep your side of the street clean.

那麼你所能做的就是保持你這邊的清潔。

I wanna anxieties, gotten a really bad brand.

我想焦慮，得到了一個非常糟糕的品牌。

So I want to also like say something nice about anxiety once upon a time.

所以我想也像說一些關於焦慮的好話，曾經的焦慮。

You know the anxiety is what made us survive the anxious.

你知道焦慮是使我們在焦慮中生存的原因。

People new to say Tiger coming, don't eat those barriers, looks like something bad is happening.

人們新說老虎來了，不要吃那些障礙物，看起來有壞事發生。

Anxiety kept us safe to a degree and people who are anxious are higher in this this personality trait called neuroticism.

焦慮在一定程度上保持了我們的安全，焦慮的人在這種被稱為神經質的人格特質上更高。

People who are higher neuroticism are also sometimes a little bit more aware of other people's stuff too.

神經質較高的人有時也會對其他人的東西有一點了解。

I consider it like a like a beautiful thing and it's beautiful and I like that I am really aware of my body and like my mind, I know it can sometimes get the best of me, but I think that I really, I like that I'm in tune and I like that.

我認為這就像一個像一個美麗的東西，它是美麗的，我喜歡我真的意識到我的身體和像我的頭腦，我知道它有時會得到最好的我，但我認為我真的，我喜歡我在調和，我喜歡這樣。

I like, you know, want to know everything anxiety when it's sort of right in that sweet spot is a little bit of a superpower because it actually helps you keep yourself safe, keep others safe, and kind of keep you mentally on point.

我喜歡，你知道，想知道一切的焦慮，當它有點在那個甜蜜的地方是一個小的超級力量，因為它實際上幫助你保持自己的安全，保持其他人的安全，並有點讓你在精神上保持點。

So there's that perfect sweet spot of anxiety where there's just enough where you're performing at the top of your game and keeping, so we want to get you.

是以，有一個完美的焦慮甜蜜點，在那裡有足夠的，你在你的遊戲中的表現和保持，所以我們想讓你。

Yeah, so we're asking all the doctors that I meet um for some tips and tricks that maybe the viewers can take into account of their own life um and apply to their life.

是的，所以我們要求我遇到的所有醫生嗯，提供一些提示和技巧，也許觀眾可以考慮到他們自己的生活嗯，並應用到他們的生活。

So if you have anything I would love to hear for myself and for all the viewers, one of the best things a person who socially anxious can do is prepare that getting caught becoming late rushing, that doesn't feel good.

是以，如果你有什麼，我很想為我自己和所有的觀眾聽聽，一個有社交焦慮的人可以做的最好的事情之一是準備，被抓到變得晚了衝，那感覺不好。

So be on time or be a little bit early.

所以要準時或提前一點。

My God, I'm such, I need to be on time if I'm not, I freak out.

我的上帝，我是這樣的，我需要準時，如果我沒有，我就會抓狂。

You go.

你去吧。

So if you can be on time or be a little bit early, even if you're sitting in your car and you're like perfect, now I'm gonna go in your less frenzied and prepare, learn what you're getting into, like how many people are gonna be there, what's it gonna feel like almost mentally rehearse it a little, that helps the law.

是以，如果你能準時或提前一點，即使你坐在你的車裡，你就像完美的，現在我要去在你不那麼狂熱和準備，瞭解你要進入什麼，比如有多少人會在那裡，會有什麼感覺幾乎精神上排練一下，這有助於法律。

So, here's the second thing.

所以，這裡是第二件事。

You can take away a lot of what can help people who are socially anxious is to get good feedback from your audience.

你可以帶走很多可以幫助社交焦慮的人的東西，就是要從你的聽眾那裡得到良好的反饋。

So a great way to do it is sort of a three point plan for how you can use your body.

是以，一個很好的方法是為你如何使用你的身體制定一個三點計劃。

It's uncross ng, I'm gonna cross my legs to uncross your arms, okay, make eye contact and smile when you do that, you disarm everyone.

它是uncross ng，我要交叉我的雙腿來解除你的雙臂，好的，當你這樣做的時候，要有眼神接觸和微笑，你會解除所有人的武裝。

And interestingly when I first met you, you did that right away and you put me at ease.

有趣的是，當我第一次見到你時，你馬上就做到了這一點，你讓我感到安心。

So I felt comfortable.

所以我覺得很舒服。

Whereas if I come in and you were just sort of distant or a leaf or remote, I would have felt anxious.

而如果我進來的時候，你只是有點疏遠，或者是一片葉子，或者是遙不可及，我就會感到焦慮。

So that's a dance and that mirror dance becomes really, you know, it becomes really important.

是以，這是一種舞蹈，這種鏡像舞蹈變得非常，你知道，它變得非常重要。

Well, thank you so much.

嗯，非常感謝你。

Thank you so glad I got to sit with you.

謝謝你，我很高興能和你坐在一起。

I learned a lot today, so thank you and I appreciate, I appreciate you sharing your story, because I'm always grateful when people talk about their stories publicly so people can see they're not alone with this.

我今天學到了很多東西，所以謝謝你，我很感激，我很感激你分享你的故事，因為當人們公開談論他們的故事時，我總是很感激，這樣人們可以看到他們並不孤單。

Because I think the hardest thing of all is to feel alone.

因為我認為最困難的事情是感到孤獨。

So thank you for doing that.

所以感謝你這麼做。

It does definitely feel like a weight is lifted when I feel something and I hear someone else saying, oh yeah, I get what you're feeling, or this must be what you're feeling, right, and I'm like, oh my gosh, yes, like that's exactly what I'm trying to express.

當我感覺到什麼，聽到別人說，哦，是的，我明白你的感受，或者這一定是你的感受，對嗎，我就想，哦，天哪，是的，好像這正是我想表達的東西。

And it's that comforting feeling of like, okay, she's either experience this herself for she knows people that have experienced it being a doctor who's seen a lot.

這是一種令人欣慰的感覺，就像，好吧，她要麼是自己經歷過，要麼是她認識的人經歷過，她是一個見過很多的醫生。

So it just makes you feel a little under, it just makes you feel understood and that's a really nice feeling.

所以它只是讓你感到有點下，它只是讓你感到被理解，那是一種非常好的感覺。