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  • Nintendo is regularly a decade behind the rest of the gaming industry. They

  • made Splatoon - one of the best ever multiplayer shooters - long after the

  • multiplayer shooter turned first hit, and only recently perfected the modern

  • open-world game with Breath of the Wild. They didn't fuss with 1080p resolution

  • until the release of the Wii U in 2012, and that's 7 full years after the rest

  • of the console market.

  • They still use cartridges, for God's sake!

  • That doesn't mean they're

  • trailing behind the competition - more like they're standing

  • behind a meat shield. Nintendo lets other companies test new ideas and take the

  • critical and financial blows that come with innovation. Then they autopsy the

  • results to achieve the same product, but better and cheaper.

  • After all, being on the cutting edge is a great way to bleed.

  • Based on this theory we can extrapolate

  • what Nintendo's next decade will look like, by looking back at last decades

  • biggest trends. Starting with the dadification of the video game industry,

  • which began in the early 2010's and was fully completed in 2018 when Kratos

  • ascended to fatherhood. Which means now's the perfect time

  • for Nintendo to get in on the trend.

  • With Mario becoming a dad!

  • Mazel Tov!

  • Based on how dadified games

  • treat motherhood, we'll probably never know who gave birth to Mario's children,

  • because why would that person matter? Based on how the Internet is, the mother

  • is probably Mario in Super Crown mode.

  • Either way, this will usher in a new

  • generation of beloved characters and mark a shift in Mario's design as well.

  • Grittier, wiser, a little gray at the temples, and a little less likely to make

  • that jump.

  • [to offscreen] Would you... could you do a grizzled old man voice?

  • Brian (grizzled old man voice): It's a me, Mario.

  • Mario jr. - and presumably his cousin Luigi jr. - will debut in a new

  • Yoshi's Island game, usurping baby Mario's place on Yoshi's back,

  • and in our hearts.

  • And on the other side of the cuteness spectrum, we have souls-likes.

  • From Software's Demon Souls and Dark Souls ushered in

  • the rise of a new genre, meant for people who were tired of feeling competent.

  • The soulsian games were third-person RPGs,

  • known for their punishing difficulty, epic boss fights,

  • and incongruously elaborate headwear.

  • Bayonetta is the obvious franchise for Nintendo to jump

  • in with, because aesthetically its basically already:

  • Baroque Souls: a dark, atmospheric spectacle with a focus on boss fights

  • and sex appeal.

  • Just LIKE Dark Souls.

  • [appreciative hum]

  • but Nintendo doesn't own Bayonetta, so instead

  • they're gonna reboot Punch-Out - but without the exclamation point so

  • that you know it's a serious franchise. Like when I remove all the exclamation

  • points from my professional emails.

  • The core mechanic will still be boss fights,

  • with a heavy emphasis on blocking and dodging

  • but the reboot will incorporate RPG elements so you can build a strength- OR

  • magic-based boxer. Rest in the locker room between fights with the bosses, and

  • when you defeat enemies you'll learn--

  • Souls.

  • Human souls.

  • On the hardware front, VR has gotten better and cheaper than ever before -

  • enough to become a real

  • viable consumer product. Nintendo previously flirted with VR with the

  • Labo headset in 2018, so it shouldn't be too much longer before they fully commit

  • to a true VR headset accessory for the switch. Breath of the Wild and Super

  • Mario Odyssey both got the VR treatment for the Labo's release, but Nintendo

  • will want a boost hype with a new game.

  • And I wish I could predict that new game

  • would be Fatal Frame because I want a new game in that franchise, but I don't

  • get what I want.

  • Obviously, it has to be a Kirby game

  • because who better to express

  • three full dimensions then that slack-jawed beanbag pillow. And to really

  • capture the bodacious experience of that cosmic chungus,

  • you won't be playing AS Kirby,

  • but against Kirby, fighting to prevent yourself from being sucked

  • face-first into the black hole of his gullet.

  • [vacuum noise!]

  • You'll play as Waddle Dee Dee, a low-level enemy,

  • who changes powers by changing accessories, and who is,

  • incidentally, my Kirby-world OC.

  • I've been refining this 3D render of Dee Dee for months now,

  • and she's perfect. And you can have her for free, Nintendo.

  • [chittery Waddle noise]

  • Relatively late in the decade, we saw the arrival of Battle Royale games. So we

  • probably won't see a Nintendo battle royale for a while. Perhaps it will line

  • up with the rumored - but not yet scheduled -

  • release of a certain bounty hunter game.

  • That's right, where we droppin Samus??

  • It's battle metroyale, baby!

  • This game will differentiate itself from other royales by basically

  • being a competitive speedrunning game. You race to gather

  • objects that unlock new areas, all the while combating the 99 other players.

  • [to offscreen] Do you think this is like... any actually kind of like a good idea for a game?

  • ahh, alright!

  • And last of all, Gone Home, Dear Esther and Firewatch gave us a new way of

  • experiencing games. But there is a lot of backlash against these

  • so-called walking sims. People complain that these weren't real games,

  • which is absurd

  • and is also the kind of controversy the kind of controversy Nintendo loves to avoid.

  • But now that all the hubbub has

  • died down, Nintendo can finally get in on the action.

  • With Ground Fox, an introspective

  • first-person game, heavy on exploration with light puzzle elements.

  • Your old friend Peppy Hare has gone missing planetside, and in order to find him...

  • you're gonna have to do a barrel stroll.

  • ha-CHA! [Star Fox victory music plays]

  • Regardless of when Nintendo takes up these trends up - uh, and they WILL -

  • they're gonna do a great job because that's just what Nintendo does.

  • What trends from the past decade would you guys like to see Nintendo pick up?

  • Honestly I would love to see a first-person hallway horror Luigi's

  • Mansion game. Reboot Luigi's Mansion as a serious franchise, Nintendo,

  • and if you don't, you're cowards.

  • The internet told me to call you that.

  • pah!

  • pah!

  • Puns will save you!!

  • Okay...

Nintendo is regularly a decade behind the rest of the gaming industry. They

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任天堂比其他游戏产业落后十年(Nintendo is a decade behind the rest of the gaming industry)

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    joey joey 發佈於 2021 年 05 月 27 日
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