I third wheel my friends, my pets

我是我朋友們的、我的寵物們的「電燈泡」

Hey, I third wheel my parents ever since I was born!

嘿，我甚至打從一出生就是我爸媽的「電燈泡」

Now I know what you're thinking, why would anyone WANT to be a third wheel?

現在我知道你們在想什麼，為什麼會有人想要當別人的「電燈泡」呢？

Being a third wheel SUCKS.

當「電燈泡」爛透了

But where others only see the drawbacks of being singled out, I see the value of a truly kick ass third wheel

但當其他人只看到做「電燈泡」的壞處, 我則看到它了不起的價值

"And I ROCK at it!"

而且我非常擅長

Aww, don't they look so cute today. But sometimes, selfies aren't enough.

噢不覺得他們看起來很可愛嗎？但有的時候，自拍是不夠的

I don't just help them take a picture.

我不只是幫他們拍照

Landscape, portrait, one for safety, flash, no flash, high angle, full body, Dutch tilt!

風景模式、肖像模式、再來一張、閃光、不閃光、高角度、全身、斜角鏡頭!

I'll even pick the filter for you. Go with Mayfair.

我還會替你的照片選濾鏡，就選 Mayfair 吧!

"Buy one get one free" deal making me feel left out? Pshh as if!

買一送一這個消費手法會使得我被忽略嗎？怎麼可能!

More like buy none get TWO free! Drink up~ go ahead.

應該是要買零送二！快喝吧！

Sidewalk too narrow for 3 of us?

三個人一起走在行人道上太擠嗎？

Every third wheel knows you have to walk a few steps behind.

每個「電燈泡」都知道自己應該要隔幾步空間

But I'm not every third wheel, I'm the best third wheel in the world.

但我不是普通的「電燈泡」，我是全世界最好的「電燈泡」

I stand a whole block behind!

我一隔就隔一整條街！

"Y'all good up there? Alright, Take a LEFT! okay?" Great

你們在前面還好嗎？恩那接下來要轉左，OK嗎？ 好極了。

Wow, looks like these guys are going to need a designated driver.

挖，看起來這個傢伙需要一個代理司機

But I'm not complaining, I'm making the wine recommendations.

但我不是在抱怨，我還向他們推薦喝哪一款酒好喝

"You'll love this Chardonnay, '97, excellent year."

你會喜歡這甁97年的Chardonnay，那是個好的年份的酒

Uh oh. Was that Pauline's ex that just walked in?

喔不，剛走進來的人不是Pauline 的前男友嗎?

This could totally ruin the night.

這肯定會破壞今晚的約會

But I don't just break the tension...

但我不僅會舒緩緊張氣氛...

I remove it. Shhh

還會靜悄悄地移除它

And while they both "go to the bathroom" to make out...

而當他們兩個去洗手間親熱時......

I'm not awkwardly waiting, annoyed.

我並不會不耐煩地等著

I put up candles and David Choi back there.

我會點燃蠟燭以及讓David Choi 陪著他們一起

Don't mind me.

別介意我。

Oh yeah

Oh yeah

"Hey Drew's mom, He's... busy right now, but he loves you and..

Hey,Drew媽媽，他現在很忙，但他很愛你而且...

Has lately been thinking about his relationship with you and wishes

而且他最近一直在想他與你之間的關係，而他希望

He could go track all the years that he took you for granted

能把時間倒轉，回到之前把你視為理所當然的那些年

And regrets not spending more time with you when he was young and impressionable

也後悔自己在年輕的時候沒有多花時間陪伴你

And now if there's one thing that he could do to say sorry and help you by being a better son

但是現在，他除了想要說一聲對不起之外他並想要成爲一個更好的兒子

'kay, good night.

okay,晚安

You're welcome, Drew

不客氣，Drew

Awkward cab ride forcing me to sit in the front alone?

怕自己一人坐在計程車前座很尷尬嗎？

I don't just sit with the cab driver.

但我不只跟司機一起坐

I AM the cab driver.

而我就是那個計程車司機!

Where to?

想去哪裡?

And finally, at the end of the night, when everyone wants to get all cute and mushy.

最後，在約會的尾聲，當每個人都想要要可愛、感傷或是肉麻一下

Usually this is the worst moment for all third wheels. But not me.

通常對「電燈泡」來說這是一個最糟的時刻。但對我來說並不是

I don't get uncomfortable.

我並不覺得不舒服、不自在

I get extremely comfortable.

我感到十分自在

So next time you feel ashamed about being a third wheel, think about me.

所以如果下一次當你覺得當「電燈泡」很丟臉的時後，想到我吧

Before you complain, consider how important your role is.

在抱怨之前，思考一下你所扮演的重要角色

I salute all those out there like me who's selfless sacrifices go overlooked,

我要向那些跟我一樣會被忽視卻又無私的犧牲和奉獻的你們致敬

But, we know it's ....

但是我們都知道....

La Quinta Rueda!(西文)

第五者!