Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights.

Does it get better than this?

Question: you're not dating anybody, are you, because I met somebody who would be perfect for you.

Ah, you see, perfect might be a problem.

Had you said co-dependent or self-destructive...

-Do you want a date Saturday? -Yes, please.

Okay.

He is cute, he's funny.

-He's a "he"? -Well, yeah.

Oh, God.

I just...I thought.

You're not, so good, Shelly. Okay.

I'm just gonna go flush myself down the toilet now.

Okay. Bye-bye.

It's hard to enjoy cup of ramen noodles after that.

I mean, is that ridiculous?

Can you believe she actually thought that?

Um.. Yeah.

Well, I mean, when I first met you...

You know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be.

-You did? -Yeah, but then.

But then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.

Huh, did uh... any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?

-I did. -Yeah, I think so, yeah.

-Not me. -No, no, me neither.

Although, uh, you know, back in college, uh, Susan Salidor did.

You're kidding.

-Did you tell her I wasn't? -No.

Well, it's just 'cause uh...

I-I kinda wanted to go out with her too

So, uh, I told her, actually you were seeing, uh, Bernie Spellman who also liked her, so..

Well, this is fascinating.

So, uh, what is it about me?

I don't know.

'Cause you're smart, you're funny.

Ross is smart and funny. You ever think that about him?

Yeah, right!

What is it?

Okay, I-I don't know.

You-you just...you have a quality.

-Yes, right. -Exactly.

Yeah, a quality.

Oh, oh, a quality, good.

Because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.