Name: 我是如何向父母隱瞞懷孕的？ (How I Hid My Pregnancy From My Parents)
Uploaded: 2021-03-26T18:36:00.000Z
Duration: 10 min 56 s

- Mom, looks like my diarrhea medicine's arrived.

- 媽媽，看來我的止瀉藥到了。

- 如果不是真的，那就不好笑了。

Like so many people at the beginning of the pandemic

But I know I was lucky that I even had that as an option.

但我知道我很幸運，我甚至有這個選項。

But as an adult, living with your parents is different,

但是成年後，和父母一起生活就不一樣了。

特別是當一些人失去工作的時候。

and some are working from home all the time.

It's just like a lot of everyone being on top of each other.

and just when I think things can't get more complicated,

就在我認為事情不能再複雜的時候，

So I just went out and bought like five pregnancy tests.

I don't think you really need to take that many.

我覺得你真的不需要吃那麼多。

It just appears that I am indeed pregnant.

我懷孕了，我和父母住在一起。

That's gonna be funny to tell the baby one day, right?

有一天告訴寶寶一定會很有趣，對吧？

I found out I was pregnant and I had to hide it

我發現自己懷孕了，我必須要隱瞞下去

from my roommates, who happened to be my parents.

從我的室友，誰碰巧是我的父母。

Before we go into that, let me backtrack a little.

在我們討論這個問題之前，讓我先回溯一下。

Because, as anyone knows, to get pregnant

in the traditional sense it takes two to tango.

And yes, my tango partner was my husband, Mike.

是的，我的探戈舞伴是我的丈夫，邁克。

我們的租約到期後，他也搬走了

Well, that's like debatable because yeah,

You know, post pandemic, post living with parents.

你知道，流行病後，與父母同住後。

there was a grace period, after you switch off

有一個寬限期，在你關閉後，你關閉

contraceptive pills to another method, you're wrong.

避孕藥到另一種方法，你錯了。

Anyway, so my husband and I find out I'm pregnant

總之，我和老公發現我懷孕了。

So we decide to wait to see if the pregnancy is viable.

所以我們決定等著看是否能懷孕。

Now with any pregnancy, most people decide to wait

現在任何懷孕，大多數人都決定等待。

to tell anybody till the end of the first trimester.

在懷孕前三個月內不告訴任何人。

And most miscarriages occur during the first trimester.

而大多數的流產都發生在前三個月。

當你到了一定的年齡，作為一個女人

and you refuse a drink, everyone around you is gonna ask,

如果你拒絕喝酒，你周圍的人都會問。

My big problem was my parents are a big fan of nightcaps.

我最大的問題是我的父母很喜歡吃夜宵。

So avoiding alcohol was a real challenge.

所以避免喝酒是一個真正的挑戰。

socially distanced dinner at my cousin's.

在我表哥家吃了一頓社會疏遠的晚餐。

而我的一個表妹在做瑪格麗特酒。

而且我還得到了一杯瑪格麗特酒。

I pretend to sip the drink throughout the night.

And my husband strategically switches his drink,

而我的丈夫戰略性地換了他的飲料。

End of night my husband is drunk, not blackout but gray.

晚上我老公喝醉了，不是黑夜，而是灰色。

所以我們意識到這不是一個方法

of strategically only drinking canned beverages,

So when my mom would offer me a drink, I take the cider.

所以當我媽給我喝的時候，我就會拿蘋果酒。

I'd soon after go to the bathroom, dump it out,

我很快就會去廁所，把它倒掉。

and replace it with something that looks similar.

So like with a cider, I would pour in some apple juice

所以像喝蘋果酒一樣，我會倒入一些蘋果汁。

And then I would drink that the rest of the night.

Although my mom was getting me my favorite cider,

雖然我媽在給我買我最喜歡的蘋果酒。

and so I felt particularly bad dumping it down,

feeding it to whatever sewer people live deep down there.

把它餵給那些住在下水道深處的人。

Now not everyone gets that in the first trimester,

現在不是每個人都能在懷孕前三個月得到。

Yeah, I ordered a bunch of jeans in a new size.

是啊，我訂了一堆新尺寸的牛仔褲。

And then that kind of ended the conversation

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我是如何向父母隱瞞懷孕的？ (How I Hid My Pregnancy From My Parents)

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pandemic

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