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  • So, uh, last night I was driving home, and I stopped at a convenience store, and I like them, I like them.


  • 'Cause they have all kinds of things there, and they have every magazine you'd want, and here's what you can do, too. Here's a tip.


  • You can stand there in the store and read all the magazines for free.


  • You don't have to buy them. You just read them while you're there, and then with the money that I save, I buy my lotto tickets, my booze, and my bus pass.

    你根本不需要花錢買。你就在那邊把雜誌全部看完,然後我所省下的錢, 我會去買彩券、買酒以及買公車月票。

  • Yeah... so... I'm always thinking.

    沒錯... 我永遠都在動腦筋。

  • And when I was in there, I noticed that the fountain drink station.


  • Have you noticed the fountain... Do you get your drinks there? Anybody?

    你們有注意過飲料機... 你們有人會在那裡買飲料嗎?有嗎?

  • Okay well, if you do, or you don't, here's what I've noticed, right here. I'd like to show you something.


  • Um, I can't believe this. I really can't.


  • This is the smallest cup that they have, right here.


  • That! You see my hand? You see the size of this?


  • This is the Gulp. It's twenty ounces. It's almost as much as two cans of soda, alright?

    這是大口杯,有 20 盎司的容量。這可是差不多兩罐鋁罐汽水的量欸?

  • I ordered an orange juice in a hotel this size. It was two hundred dollars.


  • Giant! Alright, but that's how they get you, because this is 69 cents.

    超巨大!但這就是它們引誘你的花招,因為這只要 69 分錢。

  • Now, and why would you get... For ten cents more you get double the size. You get the Big Gulp, right here.

    可是你為什麼會想買大口杯呢?畢竟你只要多花 10 分錢,就可以買到有著雙倍份量的重量杯。就是這個。

  • First of all... This is crazy!

    首先... 這簡直是瘋了!

  • And it would never fit under my jacket when I'm sneaking it into the movie theater.


  • And, why on Earth would anybody want this much soda, when they could have THIS much soda?


  • I call this three-weeks-in-the-desert.


  • It's ridiculous! This is insane! I am not joking about any of these.


  • You know our stomachsby the way, in case you don't know thisour stomachs are the size of our fist. That's really how large our stomachs are.


  • I can fit my entire arm!


  • If you drink this much Coke, it's about 800 calories.

    如果你喝這麼多可樂,總熱量差不多是 800 大卡。

  • And I guess why... the 7-11 symbol means, if you drink this much, you're gonna gain somewhere between 7 and 11 pounds.

    我終於懂 7-11 的標誌是什麼意思了,就是說當你喝進這麼多糖分後,你會胖上 7 到 11 磅 (約 3.17 公斤到 4.99 公斤)。

  • This is huge! Look how much bigger this is. I brought my regular drink in.


  • This is so much bigger than the size...


  • And I know what you're thinking. You're saying, "Ellen, I only get coffee there." Well, they have a cup for you too.

    我知道你們在想什麼你們在說:「Ellen,我只在那買咖啡。」 這樣的話,它們也有一個杯子給你。

  • You think this is a joke. It is not a joke.


  • This is a coffee mug. It's called the Ultimate Gulp.


  • How tired are you that it takes you this much coffee to wake up?


  • This is bigger than my head! The size of this... look at the size of this! Huge!

    這比我的頭還大!這大小... 你看看這大小。超巨大的!

  • Walking around sipping this like...


  • Wouldn't you be embarrassed to walk in... "Sorry, I'm late Judy"

    你進到公司說:「抱歉 Judy 我遲到了。」的時候不會尷尬嗎?

  • "I needed to grab a gallon of coffee real quick on the way."


  • And this is... this is a... Like some people use their mugs on their desk to put their pens in and store their things.

    然後這是... 這是一個... 有些人會把杯子擺在桌上拿來放筆或是其他小東西。

  • You can put a fax machine in here.


  • This is insane! I don't know what's happening to people that they need this much liquid.


  • The only pick-me-up I ever need is dancing.


So, uh, last night I was driving home, and I stopped at a convenience store, and I like them, I like them.


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A2 初級 中文 美國腔 TheEllenShow 杯子 雜誌 飲料 塞進去 咖啡

【艾倫秀】便利超商賣的荒謬商品 (Ellen Show Memorable Monologue: Cup Sizes)

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    Colin Lin 發佈於 2021 年 12 月 21 日