Starring, you guessed it, Squidward!

主演，你猜對了，是章魚哥!

This show is filmed in front of a live studio audience.

這個節目是在演播室現場觀眾面前拍攝的。

Oh, how I have dreamed of this day.

哦，我多麼夢想著這一天的到來。

Mr Tentacles, Professor of Art!

觸手先生，藝術教授！

What a marvelous opportunity for the people of Bikini Bottom!

對於比基尼底的人們來說，這是一個多麼奇妙的機會啊!

Bring me your huddled masses of bored housewives

把你那群無聊的家庭主婦帶過來吧

and I will shape them in my image.

我將按照我的形象塑造他們。

Well, don't wanna keep 'em waiting any longer!

好吧，不想讓他們再等下去了！

[indistinct chattering] Welcome to art class!

[模糊不清的喋喋不休] 歡迎來到美術課!

Oh, isn't this cooking?

哦，這不是在做飯嗎？

Sorry.

對不起，我不知道

Howdy, Squidward?

你好，章魚哥？

Are you taking this art class, too?

你也要上這個美術課嗎？

SpongeBob? In art class?

海綿寶寶？在美術課上？

Wait! This is cooking!

等等，這是在做飯！

Come back!

回來！

You gotta be kidding.

你一定是在開玩笑。

[SpongeBob laughs]

[海綿寶寶笑]

This is great! You and me in school together!

這真是太好了！你和我一起上學！

So, where is the teacher?

那麼，老師在哪裡呢？

You're looking at him.

你在看他。

You are the teacher to my pupil?

你是我學生的老師？

This isn't art class...

這不是藝術課...

it's heaven!

簡直是天堂

Yeah... Grab a little piece of heaven

是啊...搶到了一小塊天堂

and let's get on with it.

我們繼續吧

I'm ready!

我準備好了！

Mr. Tentacles.

觸手先生。

All right, SpongeBob, pay close attention.

好了，海綿寶寶，仔細聽好了。

Look at your marble.

看看你的大理石。

Visualize the sculpture within.

將雕塑的內在形象化。

Then, gently...

然後，輕輕地...

How's this, Squidward?

怎麼樣，章魚哥？

It's beautiful!

真漂亮！

Uh, I mean... Uh...

呃，我的意思是...呃，我是說...

This isn't a sculpture!

這不是一個雕塑！

A good sculpture takes...

一個好的雕塑需要...

more time.

更多的時間。

You can't just sculpt willy-nilly!

你不能隨便亂雕!

You gotta go by the book! Follow the rules!

你得按書上說的去做！遵守規則！

Otherwise you'll never get past amateur hour here.

否則你在這裡永遠過不了業餘時間。

Besides, you got the nose wrong.

而且，你把鼻子弄錯了。

There, now it's art.

好了，現在是藝術了。

Oh, it's so obvious!

哦，太明顯了！

I would've never thought of that!

我從來沒有想過這個問題!

I'm sorry, Squidward!

對不起，章魚哥！

I came here to learn and I arrogantly shunned your lessons.

我是來學習的，我傲慢地迴避了你的教訓。

I'll never be a great artist like you.

我永遠不會成為像你這樣的偉大藝術家。

I don't deserve your tutoring.

我不值得你輔導。

I don't deserve to be in your presence.

我不配在你面前。

I don't even deserve to use your door!

我連你的門都不配用!

Hello there!

你好！

Sorry, class is dismissed. You're too late.

對不起，下課了你來得太晚了

Oh, I beg your pardon, but I forgot my manners.

哦，請原諒，但我忘了我的禮貌。

My name is Monty P. Moneybags.

我叫Monty P. Moneybags.

The world-famous art collector?

世界著名的藝術收藏家？

The one and only.

唯一的一個。

Well, what are you doing here?

那麼，你在這裡做什麼？

I'm on a shopping spree. Buying art for my new museum.

我在瘋狂購物為我的新博物館買藝術品

Your search is over.

你的搜索已經結束。

I am Bikini Bottom's greatest artiste.

我是比基尼海灘最偉大的藝人。

I call it, "Bold and Brash".

我叫它，"膽大包天"。

More like, "Belongs in the Trash"!

更像是 "屬於垃圾桶"!

[laughs]

[笑]

Sorry, I must've missed that one.

對不起，我一定是錯過了那一個。

[whistles]

[口哨聲]

What is that?

那是什麼？

Wait, wait. That's not, uh, uh...

等等，等等。這不是，呃，呃... ...

- It's a... - Angelic form!

- 這是一個...- 天使的形式！

Amazing detail!

驚人的細節!

Perfect censorship!

完美的審查制度！

This is the work of a true genius!

這是一個真正的天才的作品!

Hello? What this?

喂？ - 這是什麼？這是什麼？

This is the only flaw.

這是唯一的缺陷。

Ah, that's more like it.

啊，這才像話。

I simply must find the artist responsible.

我只是必須找到負責的藝術家。

He shall have fame.

他必有名聲。

Fame...

名氣...

[Monty] Fortune!

財富！

Fortune...

財富...

[Monty] Anything his heart desires!

只要是他的心願！

Anything?

有什麼事嗎？

It's me! It's me! I'm responsible!

是我！是我！是我！ 我有責任！

I can see it now.

我現在可以看到它。

Your name in the world's most prestigious museums.

你的名字出現在世界最著名的博物館裡。

I'm gonna make you, immortal!

我要讓你，不死不休!

Now, uh, help me get this in the car.

現在，呃，幫我把這個放到車裡去。

I could use a little help.

我需要一點幫助

My fame! My fortune! My hair!

我的名聲！我的財富！我的頭髮！

Well, that's a bit of bad luck right there.

嗯，這是一個有點運氣不好的地方。

But, this shouldn't be a problem for an artist of your magnitude.

但是，對於你這樣的藝術家來說，這應該不是問題。

You can whip up another one.

你可以再來一個。

Yeah, no problem.

是的，沒問題。

You know, between you and me, this isn't my best work.

你知道，在你我之間，這不是我最好的作品。

Why don't you come back tomorrow

你明天再來吧

and I'll have something that will really knock your socks off.

我會有一些東西，將真正敲你的襪子了。

Between you and me, I'm not wearing socks.

在你我之間，我不穿襪子。

[laughs]

[笑]

Yeah, no socks.

是的，沒有襪子。

OK, see you tomorrow. Bye.

好吧，明天見。拜拜

I gotta find SpongeBob!

我得找到海綿寶寶！

Here you go, buddy.

在這裡，你去，哥們。

With this tool, I shall give birth to art!

有了這個工具，我將會誕生藝術!

Oh, boy.

哦，天啊

But, one more thing.

但是，還有一件事。

There. Now it's art.

好了，現在是藝術了現在，它的藝術。

Well, what do you think, Squidward?

你覺得呢，章魚哥？

Just take it all in for a moment.

就把這一切都看在眼裡。

Let it soak in.

讓它浸泡在。

[screams]

[尖叫聲]

I'm here for the... What the?

我是來...怎麼了？

Who is responsible for this?

誰來負責？

As of now, it's his responsibility!

就目前而言，這是他的責任!

Good day to you, sir!

祝你愉快，先生！

You, sir, are the greatest artist who ever lived!

你，先生，你是有史以來最偉大的藝術家!