17 e Did the count in 17.

17 e在17年做了統計。

I don't know.

我不知道。

That was with Matty's.

那是與馬蒂的。

All right, good night.

好吧，晚安。

So Oh, yeah, Oh, yeah.

所以，哦，是的，哦，是的。

There is a false narrative that the nuclear family is the typical family, and that's not really true.

有一種錯誤的說法，認為核心家庭是典型的家庭，這其實並不正確。

People seem to think that leave it to Beaver was a documentary.

人們似乎認為，留給阿狸的是一部紀錄片。

It wasn't, You know, you have a very wonderful family, don't you?

這不是，你知道，你有一個非常美好的家庭，不是嗎？

Oh, sure.

哦，當然

It was an ideal ized representation of what people aspired to.

它是人們所向往的理想化代表。

And since that time, the nuclear family has been held to be the ideal, and all other families have been held up against it.

而從那時起，核心家庭就被奉為理想，其他所有家庭都與之對立。

Uh huh.

嗯哼。

Families like ours weren't supposed to speak up, And if you did speak up, you could either be put in jail or there was more often the prejudice you would experience.

像我們這樣的家庭是不應該說出來的，如果你說出來了，你可能會被關進監獄，或者有更多的偏見你會經歷。

One of the false narratives that goes around about plural families is that there's no choice and that everybody that's in my are either a victim or a perpetrator.

關於多元家庭的一個錯誤的說法是，沒有選擇，每個人在我的不是受害者就是加害者。

And the lack of understanding that's gone on about plural families has really caused that narrative to grow and different legal systems have kept people quiet and afraid to come forward and say, That's not us.

而人們對複數家庭的不理解，確實造成了這種說法的發展，不同的法律制度讓人們保持沉默，不敢站出來說，那不是我們。

That's not who we are.

我們不是這樣的人

Okay, all right, It's ready.

好吧，好吧，它的準備。

Let's have blessing.

讓我們祝福。

Okay, Go ahead and say it.

好吧，繼續說吧。

It is a love story for me.

這對我來說是一個愛情故事。

We have all come from plural families.

我們都來自複數家庭。

And, you know, I just graduated from high school.

而且，你知道，我剛從高中畢業。

E really was focused on school.

E真的是專心上學。

I wasn't looking to fall in love.

我不是想談戀愛。

I knew Joe.

我認識喬

He was friends with my brother.

他是我哥哥的朋友。

And then Vicky is my cousin and I have hundreds of cousins.

然後Vicky是我的表妹，我有幾百個表妹。

So I think I saw Vicky and Bell twice when we were kids Way when we got older, Vicky and I became friends.

所以，我想我見過Vicky和Bell兩次，當我們還是孩子的時候... ...當我們長大後，Vicky和我成了朋友。

Is the relationship of the two of them Blossom decided they're gonna come back after me together, and that was very confronting for me.

他們兩個人的關係是花花決定他們要一起回來追我，這對我來說是很有對抗性的。

It was a surprise to all of us, but we were just like, let's kind of see where this goes.

這對我們所有人來說都是個驚喜，但我們只是想，讓我們看看這一切會怎樣。

We're just open thio the lifestyle, So might as well.

我們只是開放的生活方式，所以可能也。

Yeah, we both believed in it.

是的，我們都相信它。

And so we were like, Why not look at it and see how way were married for 10 years.

所以我們就想，為什麼不看一下，看看我們是如何結婚10年的。

And then this gal come shows up came along, she had come out of a divorce and it was coming over.

然後這個女孩出現了，她從離婚中走了出來，它是過來的。

And I saw her like, for the first time for me.

我第一次看到她的樣子

And we were both really confronted.

而我們都是真的面對。

I wasn't looking for another wife, and e felt the zing.

我並沒有找別的老婆，e感覺到了Zing。

And then I was like, What was that?

然後我就想，那是什麼？

No.

不知道

Shortly she joined the family along with five kids and we became a plural Brady Bunch family.

不久，她和五個孩子一起加入了這個家庭，我們成了一個複數的布雷迪邦奇家庭。

The crime has traditionally been, if you purport to be married.

罪行歷來是，如果你聲稱要結婚。

So it was a law against language, other, so we couldn't even talk about it.

所以這是一個針對語言的法律，其他的，所以我們根本談不上。

Didn't say anything about your family.

沒有說任何關於你的家庭。

You didn't want to lie.

你不想撒謊

But then you felt this pressure like I can't own who I am.

但後來你感覺到了這種壓力，就像我不能擁有我是誰一樣。

I can't say who I am.

我不能說我是誰。

I think when you do that to a culture, you do that to people where they're not even able to speak who they are or be proud of who you are.

我想，當你對一種文化這樣做的時候，你會對人們造成這樣的影響，他們甚至不能說出自己是誰，也不能為自己是誰而驕傲。

It really marginalizes and then leads for that culture to be exploited.

它真的是將這種文化邊緣化，然後導致這種文化被利用。

I'm writing a book now, in which I try to look at ways in which people who consider themselves family have to contend with a system that tends to give greater validity to mainstream families.

我現在正在寫一本書，在書中，我試圖研究那些認為自己是家庭的人如何與一個傾向於給予主流家庭更大有效性的系統進行鬥爭。

That I'm interested in the idea that this nuclear family really was an invention of the 20th century.

我感興趣的是，這個核心家庭真的是20世紀的發明。

They originate from a 19 fifties idea that there was such a thing as an ideal family, and they originate a lot from the idea of normality.

它們起源於1950年代的一種觀念，即有理想家庭這種東西，它們很大程度上起源於常態的觀念。

And it began in mathematics and in mathematics and meant the thing that occurs most frequently.

而它開始於數學和數學中，意味著出現頻率最高的事情。

Techno mistake.

技術上的錯誤。

That idea of normality was very much celebrated.

這種常態化的觀念是非常值得慶賀的。

People wanted to fit in.

人們想融入其中。

They wanted to be the same.

他們想成為同樣的人。

Eccentricity was devalued, originality was devalued.

偏心被貶低，原創性被貶低。

And while the pressure on human beings was significant, it was nothing compared to the pressure that was placed on families.

而人的壓力固然很大，但與家庭的壓力相比，根本不算什麼。

Oh, he was Tommy's father home from work.

哦，他是湯米的父親下班回家。

And here comes Mother to say hello.

母親也來打招呼了。

Every week Father comes home with money for Tommy and for mother.

每週父親都會帶著錢回家給湯米和母親。

Families had a way.

家庭有辦法。

They were supposed to look, and there were roles.

他們應該看，有角色。

There was a breadwinner father.

有一個養家餬口的父親。

There was a caretaker mother.

有一個看家的母親。

There were a couple of Children, maybe three.

有幾個孩子，也許是三個。

There was a dog.

有一隻狗。

There was a cat.

有一隻貓。

It was ideal ized in media representation and the assumption waas that in these households free of disability, free of difference, free of so many of the things in which we have since come to find meaning that it was in those households, that people would have the best, the optimal, the most wonderful experience.

這是理想化的媒體表現和假設是，在這些家庭中，沒有殘疾，沒有差異，沒有許多我們後來發現意義的東西，正是在這些家庭中，人們將有最好的，最理想的，最美妙的體驗。

So we came to a very sentimental and a very narrow notion of what it meant to be a family marriage to three women.

所以我們得出了一個很感性、很狹隘的概念，那就是三個女人的家庭婚姻。

Isn't that illegal?

這不是違法嗎？

You have never seen any family like the darker love times.

你從來沒有見過什麼家庭像暗戀時代一樣。

Three are true story of a polygamous marriage.

三是一夫多妻的真實故事。

We have the doctors here.

我們這裡有醫生。

The Dodgers were willing to come out as polygamists at a time when almost nobody did.

在幾乎沒有人這樣做的時候，道奇願意以一夫多妻的身份出來。

They said The representations that are out there of us are wrong.

他們說 外面對我們的表述是錯誤的。

There are people who are suffering in polygamous marriages.

有的人在一夫多妻制的婚姻中痛苦不堪。

There are people who find them joyful.

有的人覺得他們很快樂。

Those stories need to be heard.

這些故事需要被傾聽。

Only the stories of people who have been miserable are being heard right now.

現在只聽到了那些悲慘的人的故事。

What really got us all inspired to become more public and try to change the narrative?

到底是什麼讓我們大家受到了啟發，讓我們變得更加公眾化，並試圖改變這種說法？

Waas, My daughter Kira Um, she died when she was five months old.

華斯，我女兒基拉在五個月大的時候就死了。

The investigation and the way that we were treated and the fears that we had of interacting with other agencies.

調查和對待我們的方式，以及我們對與其他機構互動的恐懼。

It was really, really painful.

真的，真的很痛苦。

They went in and they pulled out all the kids from the same last name.

他們進去後把同姓的孩子都拉出來了。

And the schools around Thio interview them.

而Thio周邊的學校對他們進行面試。

You know, I was only 30 at the time, and I just didn't know what to do.

你知道，我當時只有30歲，我只是不知道該怎麼做。

And we had seen some other families where there were some cases where the people had had something happened to their child.

而且我們也看到了其他的一些家庭，有一些人的孩子發生了一些情況。

And we're you know, we're being accused of some kind of abuse, and they chose to kind of go deeper and hide and, you know, the fear just made them go.

而我們... ...你知道，我們被指責 某種虐待， 他們選擇了一種去更深和隱藏， 你知道，恐懼只是讓他們去。

We don't dare talk to anybody.

我們不敢跟任何人說話。

We hardly even dare go out of the house and we could see that's not gonna be healthy.

我們幾乎連家門都不敢出，可見這是不健康的。

We didn't We can't do that.

我們沒有，我們不能這樣做。

I mean, I wanted to do that because I was really scared.

我的意思是，我想這樣做 因為我真的很害怕。

But Joe was really angry, and all of us were kind of wondering what to do.

但喬真的很生氣，我們大家都在想該怎麼辦。

But we just knew it couldn't stay the same.

但我們只知道它不能保持不變。

It just couldn't stay the same.

就是不能保持不變。

Jodi constantly smile.

喬迪不斷地微笑。

Uh, way realized that narrative that we talked about us so strong that if we didn't start doing more interviews or being public or talking about it, even though it was a risk to talk about.

呃，方式意識到，敘事 我們談到我們如此強烈，如果我們不開始做 更多的採訪或被公開或談論它， 即使它是一個風險談論。

If we didn't do that, it was not ever gonna change.

如果我們不這樣做，它是永遠不會改變。

Way really tried to examine what we had to do to change the law.

方式真的試圖研究我們必須做什麼來改變法律。

Way did a lot of politicking, and we got a lot of people active in politics.

方式做了很多的政治活動，我們讓很多人積極參與政治。

I want to thank a darker for the invitation way had to really focus on the Republican Party to get any kind of influence and get people to see that we had a voice in These crimes do happen way families.

我要感謝一個黑暗的邀請方式不得不真正專注於共和黨，以獲得任何形式的影響，並讓人們看到，我們有一個聲音在這些犯罪確實發生的方式家庭。

They're often not report.

他們往往不報告。

Because of the widespread fear of the media and law enforcement Zhou has had a number of insights were crucial to bringing about decriminalization in Utah in the first place, he said.

由於媒體和執法部門的普遍恐懼，周有一些見解是首先在猶他州帶來非犯罪化的關鍵，他說。

We have tried for many years the freedom of religion argument, and it has never worked, he said.

他說，我們多年來一直在嘗試宗教自由的論點，但它從未奏效。

The freedom of religion argument does not, in fact cause people to open up and say that they want to accept those of us who are practicing polygamy.

宗教自由的說法，其實並不能使人們敞開心扉，說要接受我們這些實行一夫多妻制的人。

It was defeated by the Supreme Court in the Reynolds decision in the late 19th century.

19世紀末，最高法院在雷諾茲案的判決中否決了這一觀點。

It has been defeated in court over and over again, he said.

他說，它已經在法庭上一次又一次地被打敗了。

Polygamy is a free speech issue, he said.

他說，一夫多妻制是一個言論自由的問題。

Nobody gets in trouble because he has slept with a bunch of different women and had Children by them, he said.

沒有人陷入困境，因為他與一群不同的女人睡覺，並由他們生下孩子，他說。

I have Children with three women and I call them my wives, and it's because I use the word wives that our lives are stigmatized, he said.

他說，我和三個女人有孩子，我稱她們為我的妻子，正是因為我用妻子這個詞，我們的生活被汙名化了。

That is a free speech issue.

這是一個言論自由的問題。

I should be able to call them whatever I want to call them.

我應該可以隨心所欲地稱呼他們。

And so it was the revelation.

於是就有了這樣的啟示。

I think that this could be negotiated as a free speech issue.

我認為這可以作為一個言論自由的問題來協商。

That was his great primary insight and the beginning of the shift toward decriminalization.

這是他偉大的首要見解，也是轉向非刑罰化的開始。

A lot of people know there's no way you're ever gonna change a lot in a Mormon Legislature, and we had that unanimously passed in the Senate, overwhelmingly passed in the house.

很多人都知道，在摩門教的立法機構裡，你不可能改變很多東西，我們在參議院一致通過，在眾議院壓倒性的通過。

Polygamy is not legalized, to be clear, but it decriminalized way.

一夫多妻制不是合法化，要明確的是，但它非犯罪化的方式。

Got it to go from criminal Polonius to now.

從罪犯波洛尼烏斯變成了現在。

It's an infraction in 18 years.

18年就違規了。

Do you take in Christian, Tory and Christian Tory to Jenny's and then tests?

你會帶著克里斯蒂安、托里和克里斯蒂安-托里去珍妮家，然後測試嗎？

There's right.

是的

A lot of times the fact that it was criminalized was used as a license to then discriminate.

很多時候，這被定為犯罪的事實被用來作為然後歧視的許可證。

Well, it's not religious discrimination because you're illegal, so I can deny you housing Aiken.

好吧，這不是宗教歧視，因為你是非法的，所以我可以拒絕你的住房艾肯。

Deny your job.

拒絕你的工作。

I could deny you alone because you're involved in a Thelonious lifestyle.

我可以拒絕你一個人，因為你參與了西羅尼斯的生活方式。

So now that we've been able to alter that just this year, we're hoping that more people can come forward and own who they are and then weaken.

所以，現在我們能夠改變這一點，就在今年，我們希望更多的人能夠站出來，擁有自己的身份，然後弱化。

Put an end to this kind of narrative that continues exist from keeping people quiet.

結束這種繼續存在的讓人沉默的說法。

People.

人。

If we just hold on to the nuclear family versus being more accepting, then we continue to ignore what is in society.

如果我們只是堅持核心家庭與更多的接納，那麼我們就會繼續忽略社會上的東西。

What is is single parents, polygamous families, That's gay families.

什麼是單親家庭，一夫多妻家庭，那是同志家庭。

It's polyamorous families.

是多情家庭。

So if we're going to continue to ignore what it is, then what will continue to do is then resisted, which then turns into hating it, which then turns into more stripe.

所以，如果我們要繼續忽視它是什麼，那麼繼續做的就是然後抵制，然後變成討厭它，然後變成更多的條條框框。

However, somebody wants Thio organize themselves to create the future way.

然而，有人想Thio組織自己創造未來的方式。