Yeah.

是啊。

Way had Mr Sandler on the show last night.

偉昨晚讓桑德勒先生上了節目。

He came out and started dancing.

他走出來，開始跳舞。

Whatever.

管他呢

Uh, Sandler who?

呃，桑德勒是誰？

That's what I say.

我也是這麼說的。

Oh, he's an old friend and confidante.

哦，他是一個老朋友和知己。

Miss him to death.

想死他了。

You happy?

你高興嗎？

Like you go out and saw him.

就像你出去看到了他。

Last night was fun.

昨天晚上很有趣。

This is our little hang out.

這是我們的小聚會。

Was our home away from home?

我們的家是離家出走嗎？

Oh, come down here.

哦，下來這裡。

A little snow Nin.

小雪年。

You know, they don't know that.

你知道，他們不知道。

My first that my nickname Snowden.

我的第一次，我的暱稱斯諾登。

Snowden.

斯諾登。

It wasa little.

這是一個小。

Yeah, When I started Saturday night, you were ah, writer.

是啊，當我開始星期六晚上， 你是啊，作家。

That's right.

是的

And you took me in your wings, and you kind of carried me through the year.

你用你的翅膀帶著我，你帶著我度過了這一年。

And I never got to thank you.

而我還沒來得及感謝你。

And that's why I didn't get anything on stage.

這就是為什麼我在舞臺上什麼都沒有得到。

Good.

很好啊

Right now I wrote a lot of crap that year.

現在，我當年寫了很多廢話。

I remember.

我記得。

No, you did.

不，你有。

And I was telling everybody.

我告訴大家。

Uhh!

呃！

Now you're single guy.

現在你是單身漢了。

Yeah, Okay.

是啊，好吧。

And you have a hit show.

而你有一個熱門節目。

You have a hit show.

你有一個熱門節目。

It's gotta be e know you're out there.

一定要讓我知道你在外面。

You're living the life.

你的生活。

You with supermodels, huh?

你和超模們在一起，嗯？

You're with the uber models with the Ultra models.

你與uber車型與超車型。

Do you ever think I just want to settle down.

你有沒有想過我只是想安定下來。

I wanna have kids.

我想有孩子。

Uh, Conan, I know that deep down, I know I wanna have a nanny.

呃，柯南，我知道在內心深處，我知道我想有一個保姆。

And so to have a nanny, Yeah, I'll probably have some kids thing for sure.

所以有一個保姆，是的，我可能會有一些孩子的事情肯定。

You get a nanny.

你得到一個保姆。

It's the best way you will work your way around, huh?

這是最好的方式，你會工作的方式，嗯？

Yeah, that's a good idea, but no, it Z, it's tough because, you know, you date, like if you date now and then because I'm single.

是啊，這是一個好主意，但不，它Z，這是艱難的，因為，你知道，你的日期，像如果你現在的日期，然後因為我是單身。

It's really no story in it, you know?

這裡面真的沒有故事，你知道嗎？

So I'm a single guy, so I date here and there.

所以我是個單身漢，所以我在這裡和那裡約會。

And then the problem is, if you date like a girl and then another one, like, a couple weeks later Whatever you know, no big deal is nothing.

然後問題是，如果你像一個女孩約會 然後另一個，像，幾個星期後 不管你知道，沒有什麼大不了的是什麼。

Nothing bad going on.

沒有什麼不好的事情發生。

But you kind of mix up their stories because, you know, they all tell you the whole story about their life, and I kind of sometimes don't listen totally.

但你會把他們的故事混在一起，因為，你知道，他們都會告訴你關於他們生活的整個故事，而我有時並沒有完全聽進去。

And that it is kind of And then So then dinner a couple then?

而這是一種 然後，然後晚餐一對夫婦呢？

And then you like, criss crossed a few times.

然後你喜歡，交叉幾次。

So you forget the backstory bond.

所以你忘了背景故事的結合點。

Then they tell you they tell you something, you have to commit one way or the other.

然後他們告訴你，他們告訴你的東西，你必須承諾一個方式或其他。

So you just act you the really sad or you just pick one.

所以你就裝作你真的很傷心，或者你就選一個。

I go, Hey, I go.

我去，嘿，我去。

Hey, your sister have fun?

嘿，你妹妹玩得開心嗎？

Last night she was she had chemotherapy.

昨晚她是她做了化療。

And I go, Oh, yeah, but don't think of you like lollipops and stuff.

我說，哦，是的，但不要把你當成棒棒糖之類的東西。

You're a charming guy.

你是一個迷人的傢伙。

I forgot.

我忘了

Now I just you know, I committed it, though.

現在我只是... ...你知道，我犯了它，雖然。

Uh huh.

嗯哼。

You're from, you know, used to talk about this back in the day.

你是來自，你知道，以前我們經常談論這個問題。

You're from Phoenix.

你是鳳凰城來的

That's where you're from.

那是你的家鄉

You love it.

你喜歡它。

There you go.

這就對了

Back there much.

後面有多。

Try and get away from shop video.

試著遠離店鋪視頻。

I try Thio, but you know, showbiz kind of creeps into its kind of everywhere now because of all, you know, all the ways you could get it, the Internet and all that.

我試著Thio，但你知道，娛樂圈的那種蠕動到它的那種無處不在，現在因為所有的，你知道，所有的方式，你可以得到它，互聯網和所有的。

So I live in, like, kind of secluded area.

所以我住在，像，那種僻靜的地方。

And there's this old German woman that lives next to me, and she's really sweet and she has a garden.

有一個德國老太太住在我旁邊， 她真的很可愛，她有一個花園。

And so when I meet her, she's like the last person, but she's a kind of a secret fan, but she's just a huge bluffer.

所以當我見到她的時候，她就像最後一個人一樣，但她是一種祕密的粉絲，但她只是一個巨大的唬人。

So the first time I move in, she goes, I'm your neighbor.

所以我第一次搬進去的時候，她就說，我是你的鄰居。

I just I have a garden.

我只是... ...我有一個花園。

I'm German.

我是德國人

I don't know.

我不知道。

They say you're famous.

他們說你很出名。

I don't know.

我不知道。

I'm sorry.

我很抱歉

I don't I don't know.

我不知道，我不知道。

That's okay.

那就好

She goes, But I don't know the teeth v with the letters.

她走了，但我不知道牙齒v與字母。

I don't understand.

我不明白。

I hope you're as good as a neighbor as you are on famous I e.

我希望你能像你在著名的I e上一樣，成為一個好鄰居。

So then the next time I come in town, she goes, Ah, friend told me you were on the TV with the images on the screen.

於是，下次我進城的時候，她就說，啊，朋友告訴我，你上了電視，螢幕上的畫面。

I don't know, because I have my roses and lilies and I don't, so I wouldn't know.

我不知道，因為我有我的玫瑰和百合，我沒有，所以我不會知道。

She's weird.

她很奇怪

I don't know.

我不知道。

I go great, Great.

我走的很好，很好。

But that's good for you.

但這是對你有好處的。

That's something you and I go.

那是你我去的東西。

Great.

厲害

So the next time I come on, she's like, Hey, Cone Is Is that laser disc e Go.

所以下一次我上場的時候，她就會說："嘿，Cone是那張鐳射光盤嗎？"。

What?

什麼？

Yeah.

是啊。

Felicity started big when it hit a wall.

費利西蒂開始大展拳腳的時候，遇到了牆。

Oh, no.

哦，不

You're secretly show busy.

你暗地裡表現得很忙。

Yeah.

是啊。

Fraser's dropping in the key demos No villain by flower.

弗雷澤在關鍵的demo中滴水不漏，無惡不作的花。

She forgets And the oh so orange Poke me.

她忘記了，哦，如此橙色戳我。

I like her.

我喜歡她

How long next time?

下次還要多久？

I'm really don't know anything about showbiz.

我是真的不懂娛樂圈。

Oh, I forgot.

哦，我忘了。

What?

什麼？

This time reading.

這次讀。

I'm reading the paper that you performed with back.

我在看你表演的論文與回。

That was something I was thinking about doing.

這是我想做的事情。

What did you do?

你做了什麼？

Comedy.

喜劇。

Just before bet came out.

就在打賭出來之前。

What was the idea?

是什麼想法？

Yeah, we did a You opened for back.

是啊，我們做了一個你打開了回來。

Okay, I'll tell it, I went You began the show and then bet came out.

好吧，我就說吧，我去你開始表演，然後打賭就出來了。

I was there and Beck and I were like, there were two little dirt balls.

我在那裡和貝克和我一樣，有兩個小土球。

It's like parent trap.

這就像父母的陷阱。

We hang out together, you know?

我們一起出去玩，你知道嗎？

We're like twins.

我們就像雙胞胎。

Eso we look like two little gas station attendants, except one of us is really smart.

我們看起來就像兩個小加油站的服務員 除了我們中的一個非常聰明

One of us is me.

我們中的一個就是我。

Eso I open form of this environmental gig.

埃索我打開這個環保演出的形式。

It's all charity.

這都是慈善事業。

And, uh so I go out and do my act, and then But while Devo was on, it was all for these computer kind of nerdy people.

然後，呃... ...所以我出去做我的表演，然後... ...但當Devo是在，它是所有這些 電腦那種書呆子的人。

So the benefit for computer people and I'm not sure it wasn't a benefit, wasn't I don't know what story eso you got paid a lot of money.

所以電腦人的福利，我不確定這是不是一種福利，是不是我不知道什麼故事eso你得到了很多錢。

Probably.

也許吧

I don't know.

我不知道。

I eso I go something I cured that night s So I go.

我走了，我去的東西 我治癒了那一夜，所以我去。

I talked to back and he's got, like, this big case with like it's like a clown suit.

我跟回和他有一樣，這個大的情況下， 像它像一個小丑的衣服。

He's getting his whole band ready because he's a little eccentric, but he's really good.

他把整個樂隊都準備好了，因為他有點古怪，但他真的很厲害。

She was like you were the green hair.

她就像你是綠毛。

You were the hula skirt.

你就是那個草裙舞女郎。

She's getting his band ready.

她在給他的樂隊做準備

And then he goes, You wanna go on me?

然後他說："你想去找我嗎？

And I go?

那我去嗎？

Yeah.

是啊。

So he goes Alright.

所以他走了 好吧。

Welder glasses.

焊工眼鏡。

He was really specific.

他真的很具體。

White gloves, crook adviser.

白手套，金光黨顧問。

I go cool heavy and he goes, if you know where the cook advise going, Come out.

我走了，他走了，如果你知道廚師要去哪裡，就出來吧。

All right.

好吧，我知道了

So he does Electric Avenue and he wants me to break dance with him so he does Electric avenue, and then he goes like this.

所以他做了 "電子大道"，想讓我和他一起跳霹靂舞，所以他做了 "電子大道"，然後他就這樣了。

So I come out on, then he puts on a deer head and doesn't eat you.

所以我出來上，然後他戴上鹿頭，不吃你。

Oh, we went out and then the two of you, at the same time, that would be cool.

哦，我們出去，然後你們兩個人，同時出去，那就太酷了。

Way were like pop lock, electric Boogaloo on dso It was total blast And then all the neurons in hindsight and then they got home.

就像流行鎖，電子Boogaloo的DSO，這是總的爆炸，然後所有的神經元在事後看來，然後他們回家。

They couldn't wait that long on back.

他們不能在後面等那麼久。

Is it?

是嗎？

David Spade e o king dot com Change.

David Spade e o king dot com 改變。

Don't don't don't Don't change.

不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要不要改變。

Meet my mom Numbers country you want.

遇到我的媽媽數字國家你想。

You don't have to do that on a computer?

你不用在電腦上做？

No, I have an old typewriter.

不，我有一臺舊的打字機。

Compute.

計算。

That's one crappy computer.

那是一臺蹩腳的電腦。

People don't know this a couple of months ago, I never hang out with celebrities.

大家不知道，幾個月前，我從不和名人混在一起。

I have no celebrity friends.

我沒有名人朋友。

But you're in town and I bump into you somewhere, and I end up eating dinner with you and your dad, who I hung out with for a bit peewee.

但你在城裡，我在某個地方碰到你，最後我和你還有你爸爸一起吃了晚飯，我和你爸爸一起出去玩了一會皮威。

His his name?

他的他的名字？

Yeah.

是啊。

He do not want to see how he goes.

他不想看他怎麼走。

He goes by that Hey, doesn't want.

他通過那個嘿，不想。

But he was a real character.

但他是一個真正的人物。

He was very opinionated.

他很有主見。

I remember that.

我記得。

Yeah, you know, it's funny Is my dad came out for the NBC affiliate Announcements of the new shows And so he goes, Yeah, I just wanna tag along, you know, because they've been divorced while so where his buddies were hanging out now and he's totally like he's kind into the showbiz thing.

是啊，你知道，這很有趣，我爸爸來參加NBC的新節目發佈會，所以他說，是啊，我只是想跟著一起去，你知道，因為他們已經離婚了，所以他的朋友們現在都在外面玩，他完全像他的那種進入娛樂圈的事情。

So he goes, I just say, I'm just your dad.

所以他去，我就說，我只是你的爸爸。

I'll hang out.

我出去玩玩。

So I had to leave and he goes, I'll run back and kind of hanging for you at the party, be your eyes and ears.

所以我不得不離開，他走了，我跑回去，算是在晚會上給你掛個電話，做你的耳目。

So I go all right.

所以，我去沒事。

That doesn't sound like a good idea to go ahead.

這聽起來不像是一個好主意，要去。

Eso he goes.

所以，他去。

And so he's sitting there with all these showbiz people.

所以他和這些娛樂圈的人坐在一起。

When he goes, I had a few knocks.

他走的時候，我有幾下子。

Davey.

戴維

At that point, I had a few wax.

那時候，我有一些蠟。

So he's, of course, because he's drunk all the time.

所以他，當然，因為他一直在醉。

So he goes.

所以他走了。

I mean, always nice to throw that in about Dad.

我的意思是，總是不錯的扔在爸爸。

He had a few cordials.

他有一些可麗餅。

So, uh, he's in there and he goes, They were all blah, blah showbiz.

所以，呃，他在那裡，他去， 他們都是什麼什麼娛樂圈。

So I decided they wanted to hear the every man's perspective.

所以我決定他們想聽聽每個人的觀點。

I don't no one wants to hear you're bringing.

我不想聽你帶。

So he goes.

所以他走了。

So he's there with my producer of Just Shoot Me and some other people.

所以他和我的《射殺我》的製片人還有其他一些人在一起。

Any chimes in with, uh, Nathan Lane had to come out and do a a little stand up comedy thing to talk about is showing us so Nathan Lane's comedy bit pretty good e se this to such a B C.

任何鐘聲與，呃，內森-萊恩不得不出來，做一個小的站立喜劇的事情，談論是顯示我們所以內森-萊恩的喜劇位相當不錯的E se這到這樣的B C。

And then my producer goes, you know, Bill's Quagmire, the producer of Nathan Lane Show Hey didn't let me finish E, but the stand up was not where it could be, but the show clips were big buzz.

然後我的製片人去了，你知道，比爾的泥沼，內森-萊恩秀嘿的製片人沒有讓我完成E，但站立的地方不是它可以，但節目剪輯是大嗡嗡聲。

Where I was looks like a sure hit So he's backpedaling all the way.

我剛才的位置看起來像是必中，所以他一直在後退。

And they're like, No, Mr Peewee, you've really said the wrong thing.

他們會說，不，Peewee先生，你真的說錯話了。

A Navy.

一個海軍。

I think I fixed it.

我想我修好了

How do you finish from that?

你是如何完成從？

Let me finish complaint with eyes cross.

讓我橫眉冷對地完成抱怨。

It's gonna come back around, You know, it's like the Dow.

它會回來的，你知道，這就像道瓊斯指數。

So you're hosting Start out live tomorrow.

所以你明天要主持 "開始 "直播。

It's gonna be fun.

這將是有趣的。

It's scary.

太可怕了

And that's why I'm, like, half half makeup on their beat me up in the trenches down there, there.

這就是為什麼我一樣，一半一半的化妝 在他們的打我在戰壕裡有，有。

Uh, like 13 things.

呃，像13件事。

It's ridiculous.

太荒唐了

Gonna give 80% everyone, you know, high anybody.

會給80%的人，你知道，高任何人。

That sounds like a killer show.

這聽起來像一個殺手秀。

I'm doing the caveman afraid of caves.

我做的是山洞人怕山洞。

It's a great sketch.

這是一個偉大的素描。

One joke.

一個笑話。

Do it for 12 minutes.

做12分鐘。

Hi, Lynne.

嗨，琳恩

Afraid of flying?

怕飛？

Any time you do a sketch Now, um, they might make it into movies.

任何時候，你做一個草圖 現在，嗯，他們可能會讓它成為電影。

You have to sign a document before you perform it.

你必須在文件上簽字才能執行。

How much you make for the sequel?

你為續集賺了多少錢？

All that stuff.

所有這些東西。

So once that it's quick, you got a lawyer, you get it?

所以，一旦它的快速，你有一個律師，你明白嗎？

Affidavit There, you notary King Kong.

誓約書 在那裡，你公證金剛。

You're in the sketch.

你在草圖中。

So hopefully So you've really jazzed everybody up about this show?

所以希望... ...你真的讓大家對這個節目產生了興趣？

We'll be checking that out.

我們會去看看的。

It's gonna be fun may got some surprise guests.

這將是有趣的，可能會有一些驚喜的客人。

Boom!

轟！

That's only wanted to hear.

這只是想聽。

I'd watch a show that has some boob in it.

我願意看一個有胸的節目。

Just shoot me.

開槍打我吧

Of course.

當然了

Tuesdays at nine o'clock PM Congratulations on that.

每週二晚上九點恭喜你。

Thanks.

謝謝你

Going Starting on posting, son.

要開始發帖了，兒子

I love this week with musical guest Eagle Eye Cherry Kids Love Eagle Eye Cherry David Spade everybody Fred Savage.

我愛本週與音樂嘉賓鷹眼櫻桃兒童愛鷹眼櫻桃大衛-斯派德大家弗雷德-薩維奇。