Name: 切爾西-漢德勒的性愛規則--TBS的CONAN頻道 (Chelsea Handler's Rules For Sex - CONAN on TBS)
Uploaded: 2021-02-08T22:15:35.000Z
Duration: 4 min 6 s

動名詞

you have, said Chelsea, that you have specific rules for lovemaking when you're with a guy.

你有，切爾西說， 你有特定的規則做愛 當你與一個人。

to 不定詞

What, first of all, not to use the term lovemaking that Zaveri old fashioned.

什麼，首先，不要用扎維里老套的做愛一詞。

I don't I don't have rules for sex or anything.

我沒有... ...我沒有性的規則或任何東西。

I mean, I just you know, it should be a man shouldn't talk like, you know you shouldn't like make noises.

我的意思是，我只是... ...你知道，它應該是一個男人不應該說話一樣， 你知道你不應該像使噪音。

When men make noises, you know women should make noise.

當男人發出聲音的時候，你就知道女人應該發出聲音。

You're lucky that you're getting to have sex with us in the first place, So way should we in the beginning, I'm saying, before you get to know someone, if you haven't been with them for six months or a year, then you know, just keep it to a dull roar like, you know, whatever you're thinking like, I don't like guys making a lot of noise in bed.

你很幸運，你能在第一時間和我們做愛，所以我們在一開始就應該這樣，我是說，在你認識一個人之前，如果你沒有和他在一起半年或一年，那麼你知道，只要保持一個沉悶的吼聲，就像，你知道，不管你在想什麼，我不喜歡男人在床上製造很多噪音。

It's embarrassing, and it's hard to come back from and faces when I mean you guys all need to go home.

這是尷尬的，這是很難回來 從和麵孔時，我的意思是你們都需要回家。

Every man should take care of himself in front of a mirror and look at the face that you make when you climax on D.

每個男人都應該在鏡子前照顧好自己，看看你在D上高潮時的表情。

Look at what you do, because I don't think you guys know the faces that you're making and you need to look in the mirror.

看看你做了什麼，因為我覺得你們不知道自己在做什麼表情，你們需要照照鏡子。

Look at that and see, Is that something I want to take into the bedroom?

你看看，我是不是要帶進臥室？

Because usually, if yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

因為通常情況下，如果是，是，是，正是。

First of all, you should shut your eyes because my eyes are always open.

首先，你應該閉上眼睛，因為我的眼睛一直是睜著的。

No one told that it's really bad when you open your eyes is a woman and there's a guy on top and you looking like, Why are you looking at me so close?

沒有人告訴你，當你睜開眼睛的時候，真的很糟糕，是一個女人，上面有一個男人，而你的樣子是，你為什麼這麼近的看著我？

I'm checking to make sure that your eyes are closed.

When I opened my eyes, I'm checking to make sure.

當我睜開眼睛的時候，我正在檢查確認。

But men, you just made a face that is very I could tell that that is something you do in bed and you could pretend it's not.

但是男人，你剛才做的表情很我看得出，那是你在床上做的事情，你可以假裝不是。

That is my I'm telling you that I do like they do like there's this face that meant go like like I had a boyfriend and I didn't know.

這是我的我告訴你，我做的喜歡他們做的喜歡有這個臉，意味著去像我有一個男朋友，我不知道。

我和他約會，然後我睜開眼睛。

No, that's a That's a Galapagos Sea towards I mean, what are you talking about?

不，那是一個... ...那是一個加拉帕戈斯海... ...我的意思是，你在說什麼？

Why I said, Hey, buddy, do you wanna go take a look at yourself?

我為什麼說，嘿，夥計，你想去看看你自己嗎？

Because this isn't making me want to finish what we're doing.

因為這不會讓我想完成我們正在做的事情。

And you also need to take your socks off.

I've had that happen twice, and I didn't like it.

我遇到過兩次這種情況，我不喜歡。

Okay, so take the socks off and don't have your head.

好吧，那就把襪子脫了，別有你的頭。

Don't go back and forth like, yeah, And don't way say something If a woman says something in bed and we're a little tipsy and we wanted, like, scream out or not scream out like, say, oh, you know, make a suggestion.

不要來來回回的喜歡，是啊，不方式說些什麼 如果一個女人說什麼在床上，我們是一個有點醉了，我們想，喜歡， 尖叫出來或不尖叫出來一樣，說，哦，你知道，做一個建議。

And if you don't hear us in the bedroom and we don't know you that well, don't say what don't say like, we're not gonna just flip us over and just act like you heard.

如果你在臥室裡沒有聽到我們的聲音，而我們又沒有那麼瞭解你，不要說什麼不要說喜歡，我們不會把我們翻過來，就當你聽到了。

Okay, E mean that I'm just saying men don't understand how to be cooler in bed, and they need to be a little bit cooler.

好吧，E的意思是說，我只是說男人不懂如何在床上更酷，他們需要更酷一點。

You've been married forever, so I'm sure your wife is already doing a bunch of favors.

你結婚這麼久了，想必你老婆已經幫了不少忙了。

Well, by continuing to be married to me, I think maybe a huge at least there's no pressure dating you.

好吧，通過繼續與我結婚，我想也許一個巨大的至少有 沒有壓力約會你。

Chelsea know Thistle is why, Yeah, this is why I have to go abroad.

切爾西知道西斯爾是為什麼，是啊，這就是我為什麼要出國的原因。

Uh, you say, Is this true that you won't?

You know it's not fun and older man, I'm done with older man along with older man.

你知道這不好玩，老男人，我和老男人一起完蛋了。

They're just not that I was dating two older, like I was getting, like, 20 years older than me.

他們只是不，我是約會的兩個老，像我越來越，像，比我大20歲。

And it's just not fun, because when older men, you know, a man who an older man who drinks is, like, kind of it's kind of gross, you know?

它只是不好玩，因為當老男人， 你知道，一個人誰一個老男人誰喝， 喜歡，那種它是一種毛，你知道嗎？

Do you ever go out with a guy who was in his seventies or eighties?

你有沒有和一個七八十歲的男人約會過？

But I've been dating a couple of younger guys, and I like where that's headed.

但我一直在和幾個年輕的傢伙約會，我喜歡這樣的發展。

Yeah, I'm not looking to settle down, so I think why not just survey the land and see what's out there?

是啊，我不打算安定下來，所以我想為什麼不直接勘察土地，看看有什麼？

你知道，我要去找一個平等主義者。

That's very you're very democratic about it.

你就像，是的，像一個聯合國。

Yeah, it's like every time I come on here, we start talking about sex.

是啊，這就像每次我來到這裡， 我們開始談論性。

I don't know if it's you or me or ifit's.

我不知道是你還是我，還是它的。

 Probably not may be a just a creep that's all creep that lives behind that wall. 

可能不是可能只是一個住在那堵牆後面的都是爬蟲的爬蟲。