I don't know.

我不知道。

I just find better ways of communicating than using foul and obscene language you want.

我只是找到了更好的交流方式，而不是你想用粗話和淫穢的語言。

You want to see the Indian parents fall apart, question them.

你想看印度父母崩潰，就質疑他們。

Holy shit.

我的天啊

They have no clue what to do.

他們不知道該怎麼做。

Son, I don't want you going to that club tonight.

兒子，我不希望你今晚去那個俱樂部。

I go.

我去。

Why not?

為什麼不呢？

What do you mean, why not?

什麼意思，為什麼不？

E?

E?

I need to know why I should not go to this club.

我需要知道為什麼我不應該去這個俱樂部。

Because it's a fact.

因為這是一個事實。

What?

什麼？

What do you mean?

什麼意思？

What does that even mean?

這到底是什麼意思？

It means it's a fact.

這意味著這是一個事實。

You haven't given me one fact.

你還沒有給我一個事實。

So when something is the fact that the fact you cannot change the fact because the fact is the fact when it comes to fake in the orgasm, you don't have to do anything crazy.

所以，當有些事情是事實，事實是你無法改變的事實，因為事實是事實，當它是假的在高潮，你不必做任何瘋狂的事情。

All right?

好嗎？

You're just doing your normal sex that you guys do and don't act like you do all kinds of fancy shit in the bedroom.

你只是在做你們正常的性愛，不要像在臥室裡做各種花樣。

Okay, people, we all know it once you're in a relationship for a while.

好了，各位，一旦談了一段時間的戀愛，我們都知道。

There's the three basic positions There's the US, the her, the you.

有三個基本立場 有美國，她，你。

That's all there is.

這就是全部。

It's three moves.

這是三招。

One to get it started.

一來可以開始。

This one's for us.

這個是我們的。

Okay, Now it's your turn, sweetheart.

好了，現在輪到你了，親愛的。

And then and then my turn.

然後，然後輪到我了。

That's what happens.

這就是發生的事情。

How you doing, buddy?

你怎麼樣，夥計？

Good.

很好啊

You chose to look like a sperm tonight.

你今晚選擇了像個精子。

I say, that was your choice you made.

我說，那是你自己的選擇，你做的。

How did you get here?

你怎麼會在這裡？

It's our traffic.

這是我們的交通。

Doesn't bother him.

不打擾他。

I was around a million others.

我身邊有無數人。

That's an awful outfit.

這是一個可怕的裝備。

It was the real reason.

這才是真正的原因。

I don't enjoy Bollywood films because I love car chases and you can never have a car chase in Mumbai.

我不喜歡寶萊塢電影，因為我喜歡追車，而在孟買，你永遠不可能有追車的機會。

It's not even a plausible idea.

這根本不是一個合理的想法。

Quick, Get him E o e o Mom!

快，抓住他，媽媽！

All my burns When I burned my mother was what I said.

我所有的燒傷 當我燒傷我母親的時候，我是這麼說的。

It burns when I burb.

我一燒就燒起來了。

Oh, my God.

哦，我的上帝。

His bones or any Bubs?

他的骨頭還是什麼布布？

Oh, my God, son.

哦，我的上帝，兒子。

OK, do this.

好吧，這樣做。

Don't burp.

不要打嗝。

Why do you think you're fat?

你為什麼覺得自己很胖？

I said, because I have a mirror on.

我說，因為我開了一面鏡子。

I walked past it naked the other day and I thought somebody else was in my room.

前幾天我光著身子走過它，我還以為有別人在我的房間裡。

I'm who's fat, Hairy?

我是誰的胖子，發哥？

That turns out it was my stomach.

原來是我的胃。

I got like, a weird kind of fat.

我得到了像，一種奇怪的脂肪。

I was like, my normal fat.

我就像，我的正常脂肪。

And then I woke up one morning.

有一天早上，我醒來的時候。

I was like, from the who's, um, bloated.

我當時想，從誰的，嗯，臃腫。

I figured I would pee it out.

我想我應該把它尿出來。

I would sweat it out.

我會出汗的。

I'll be fine the next day.

第二天我就好了。

Anyway, cut to a year and a half later on.

總之，切到一年半以後的事。

I'm still e became like the new must a king You couldn't out in the Mustang me for nothing.

我仍然是E成為像新的必須一個王 你不能在野馬我白白。

I was like I was in a must and the shit out of people like Mustangs must must.

我當時就像我在必須和野馬這種人的屎尿屁必須必須。

I was turning spins on it must, motherfucker.

我是在轉圈，必須，混蛋。

I was like a black girl like church breaking it down.

我就像一個黑妞一樣教會分解。

I'm gonna prove to every woman in here that every man has a d d.

我要向這裡的每一個女人證明 每個男人都有一個D D。

Here's what happens is we get behind You were good for the first two strokes and then after that a d d e Like this.

這就是我們落後的原因，你前兩杆還不錯，之後就... ...就像這樣。

Yeah.

是啊。

All right, e gotta change that lightbulb when I'm done, huh?

好吧，我做完後得換個燈泡，嗯？

Shit!

媽的！

Let me get back there now You have to sell the orgasm.

讓我回到那裡，現在你必須出售的高潮。

That's where the work comes in.

這就是工作的意義所在。

So it's things you loathe Just collapsed.

所以你厭惡的東西才會崩潰。

I have a son.

我有一個兒子。

Uh, he's a month and a half old, you know that that small like everything is a tit that comes to us.

呃，他才一個半月，你知道那個小的像什麼都是奶頭來的。

I e gotta kiss him.

我得吻他

He's like, Oh, that's my nose.

他說，哦，那是我的鼻子。

Get out of the O.

離開O。

You ever get a nipple this big?

你有過這麼大的乳頭嗎？

You need to check the check because it's something weird going on.

你需要檢查一下，因為這是很奇怪的事情。

That's what will happen to our culture if we don't stay together.

如果我們不在一起，我們的文化就會發生這樣的事情。

What will happen to our culture?

我們的文化會發生什麼？

Let me tell you what will happen to our culture.

讓我告訴你，我們的文化會發生什麼。

Nothing.

什麼都沒有。

You know why?

你知道為什麼嗎？

Because there's 1.3 billion Every Indian outside of India never married another Indian again.

因為有13億印度以外的印度人再也沒有和其他印度人結婚。

We would still have 1.3 billion radio.

我們還是會有13億的無線電。

You don't need us helping you.

你不需要我們幫你。

Even you guys like stop, Please.

連你們都喜歡停下來，請。

We don't need any more.

我們不需要更多。

Women don't fake orgasm because they can't have them.

女人不會因為得不到高潮而假裝高潮。

Women fake orgasms because men are fucking idiots.

女人假裝高潮是因為男人都是他媽的白痴。

Way either Don't pay enough attention to a woman or we fixate on one spot like huh?

要不就是對女人不夠重視，要不就是盯著一個點不放？

On she's like, Oh Oh, Okay.

她就像，哦，哦，好吧。

Oh, How you doing, buddy?

哦，你怎麼做，哥們？

Okay.

好吧，我知道了

Mhm.

嗯

Hey, Must be good.

嘿，一定很好。

Give me a sharp one.

給我一個鋒利的。

That's how you know you're really fucking good.

這樣你才知道你是真的他媽的好。

It wasn't even multiples is one.

它甚至不是倍數是一個。

Women are funny.

女人很有趣。

Your wife must have a sense of humor.

你老婆一定很有幽默感。

She's seen you naked of Don't like you come back?

她看過你的裸體不喜歡你回來嗎？

Do I call you or do I just commit a crime?

我是給你打電話，還是直接犯罪？

Probably committing a crime would get me to Ukraine.

可能犯罪會讓我去烏克蘭。

This is me and my most invited.

這是我和我最邀請。

Thank you and good night.

謝謝你，晚安。