Let's be honest, you definitely could.

說實話，你絕對可以。

- I could hurt you. (Josh laughs)

- 我可以傷害你。（喬希笑）

(upbeat TV music)

(歡快的電視音樂)

- Hey, guys, welcome to Stir Crazy,

- 嘿，夥計們，歡迎來到 "瘋狂攪拌"。

the only thing stopping me from eating a tub of ice cream

唯一阻止我吃冰激凌的東西是什麼？

in the middle of the afternoon again.

在下午的時候，又。

You know my guest today as an entrepreneur,

你知道我今天的嘉賓是一個企業家。

an actor from "Fantastic Four", "Sin City",

《神奇四俠》、《罪惡之城》的演員。

and her recurrent series, "L.A.'s Finest".

和她的經常性系列 "洛杉磯最美"。

It's Jessica Alba.

是傑西卡-阿爾芭

Hey, Jessica! - Hey,

嘿，傑西卡！- 嘿，傑西卡！

hi! - It's good to see you.

嗨！- 很高興見到你。

How you doing?

你好嗎？

- I'm good, how are you doing?

- 我很好，你怎麼樣？

- I'm doing alright. - Not eating ice cream, I see.

- 我做得很好。- 沒有吃冰淇淋，我明白了。

- I know, you're keeping me from the tub again.

- 我知道，你又讓我不敢去洗澡了。

You're so obnoxious that way. (Jessica laughs)

你是如此令人討厭的方式。（傑西卡笑）

I was hoping at least- - Sorry.

我希望至少...

- I was hoping at least during a pandemic,

- 我希望至少在大流行期間。

you might look like a mess.

你可能看起來像一個爛攤子。

Like you might like, "Oh, Jessica's let herself go.

就像你可能會喜歡，"哦，傑西卡的讓自己去。

"I'm actually not gonna feel-"

"其實我不會覺得--"

- I have a little bit.

- 我有一點。

- Oh, stop it.

- 哦，停止它。

Stop it (laughs). - Well, you know,

別說了（笑）。- 嗯，你知道的。

I did a little hair and makeup for you today,

今天我為你做了一個小小的髮型和化妝。

but... - Okay, I appreciate that.

但是...

I have 12 pages of questions about "Honey".

我有12頁關於 "蜂蜜 "的問題。

Do you have that much time today?

你今天有那麼多時間嗎？

Are you ready?

你準備好了嗎？

- No. (Josh laughs)

- 不，（喬希笑）

- I, or how can you possibly

- 我，或者你怎麼可能

have 12 pages though? - No, I don't, I don't.

有12頁，但？ - 不，我沒有，我沒有。- 不，我沒有，我沒有。

I've been watching your YouTube videos lately.

我最近一直在看你的YouTube視頻。

You've become a YouTuber.

你已經成為一個優步。

Like, you've like, you've like, really done this.

就像，你已經喜歡，你已經喜歡，真的做到了這一點。

- You know, thank you.

- 你知道，謝謝你。

- One of the things I like that you've been doing is ASMR.

- 我喜歡你一直在做的一件事就是ASMR。

Have you become like an expert in ASMR?

你是否已經成為像ASMR的專家？

Like, can you, what's your favorite sound you've discovered?

比如，你能不能，你最喜歡你發現的什麼聲音？

(tapping teeth)

(咬牙切齒)

And this one.

還有這個

(rubbing palms)

(搓手掌)

It's a good one. - That is good.

這是一個很好的。- 這是很好的。

Wait, can you, can you detect this here?

等等，你，你能檢測到這裡嗎？

Let's see how you are at detecting things, okay?

看看你的偵查能力如何，好嗎？

(scissors swishing)

（剪刀嗖嗖）

What is that?

那是什麼？

Are you doing this?

你在做這個嗎？

(scissors swishing)

（剪刀嗖嗖）

Oh, scissors. - I got a problem.

哦，剪刀。- 我有個問題

- Ooh, that's good. - That's good.

- 哦，這是很好的。- 這是很好的。

- Nice, that is good. (Josh laughs)

- 不錯，這是很好的。（喬希笑）

- I do admire your willingness to put yourself out there

- 我真的很佩服你願意把自己放在那裡。

on the Tik and the Tok, on the TikTok now.

在提克和托克上，現在在提克托克上。

- Oh, mm-hm, see- - I feel like 90 years old.

- 我覺得自己像90歲的老人。

- You're old when you say that.

- 你說這話的時候，你已經老了。

- I know, I feel 90

- 我知道，我覺得90

when I say it. - Because they don't call it

當我說出來的時候。- 因為他們不叫它

the Tik and the Tok. (Josh laughs)

Tik和Tok。（喬希笑）

- Did you, were you dragged into Tik-ing and Tok-ing,

- 難道，你是被拖進了嘀嘀和嘟嘟。

or are you enjoying your TikTok-ing?

還是你喜歡你的TikTok-ing？

- The kids were encouraging me, and I just said,

- 孩子們都在鼓勵我，我只是說。

"You know, are people gonna think I'm like a creep?

"你知道，大家會不會覺得我像個變態？

"Like, is this creep status?

"好像，這是爬行狀態？

"'Cause everyone's a child."

"因為每個人都是孩子。"

And I think I was one of the first adults to join TikTok.

我想我是第一批加入TikTok的成年人之一。

Not kidding, I'm not kidding.

不是開玩笑，我沒有開玩笑。

I was like, "Is it weird?"

我當時想，"是不是很奇怪？"

And they were like, "No, it'll be fun!

他們就說："不，會很好玩的!

"Just don't be cringy."

"只要不畏畏縮縮就好。"

And I was like, "I don't know how to not be cringy."

我當時想，"我不知道如何不被皺巴巴的。"

(Josh laughing) Like, I don't know how to not.

（喬希笑）一樣，我不知道如何不。

I'm just going to be,

我只是要。

so can we embrace that? - I only have one mode,

所以我們可以接受嗎？- 我只有一種模式。

it's cringe mode.

它的畏縮模式。

That's my mode (laughs). - Cringy.

這是我的模式（笑）。- Cringy。

I'm gonna be cringy.

我將會是皺巴巴的。

And so, I don't know, I like it,

所以，我不知道，我喜歡它。

and it makes me giggle, man.

這讓我傻笑，男人。

It's funny.

這很有趣。

- What's a good starter TikTok move for me

- 我有什麼好的起手TikTok動作

if I wanna get into the TikTok-ing?

如果我想進入TikTok-ing?

What's, do you have a good piece of advice for me?

什麼，你有什麼好建議給我嗎？

Should I...

我應該...

By your face, I'm sensing you're like,

從你的臉上，我感覺到你像。

"Don't even bother, dude."

"別費勁了，老兄。"

- (hums) I mean, you should learn how to do the "Whoa".

- 我的意思是，你應該學習如何做 "哇"。

- What's that? I don't even, I've never heard of that.

- 那是什麼？我甚至，我從來沒有聽說過。

Is that a thing? (upbeat TV music)

那是一件事嗎？（歡快的電視音樂）

- It's like those, this.

- 就像那些，這。

So you go like that.

所以你就這樣走了。

- Like... - But, but stop.

- 就像...

You have to like, boom, you have to hit it.

你必須喜歡，繁榮，你必須打它。

There you go.

這就對了

But the other way, other arm.

但另一條路，另一條手臂。

There you go.

這就對了

- I look really cool when I do that.

- 我這樣做的時候，看起來真的很酷。

That's...

那是...

- You're very cool.

- 你非常酷。

You can like, as if you're tossing an invisible ball

你可以喜歡，就像你在扔一個看不見的球一樣。

up in the air. - Uh-huh?

在空氣中。- 啊哈？

- Like that, and then you catch the ball,

- 像這樣，然後你接球。

and then you slam the arm down like that.

然後你像這樣把胳膊往下砸。

- Okay, let's try it, okay?

- 好吧，我們來試試，好嗎？

- Okay, ready? - Three, two, one.

- 好了，準備好了嗎？- 三、二、一

(fist thumps)

（拳頭砰砰）

(Jessica laughs)

（傑西卡笑）

(Josh laughs)

（喬希笑）

- Yeah, no, not that one. - No?

- 是的，不，不是那一個。- 不是嗎？

Ugh, I feel like, I feel like

呃，我覺得像，我覺得像。

the saddest old man ever. - It's okay.

最悲哀的老男人。- 沒事的

(Josh laughs)

（喬希笑）

(both laugh)

（兩者笑）

- Congratulations are in order.

- 恭喜你

"L.A.'s Finest" is now in its second season.

"洛杉磯最美 "已進入第二季。

- Yes! - It's a cool show in that

- 是的！

it's a little bit back to basics for you.

這對你來說有點返璞歸真。

I mean, one of your breakthrough roles,

我的意思是，你的一個突破性角色。

I always think back to "Dark Angel".

我總會想起《黑暗天使》。

- Right. - When you do

- 是的，當你這樣做的時候- 當你做

like, a physical role like this, an action kind of a role,

像，這樣的物理角色，一個動作類的角色。

do you go back in time?

你會回到過去嗎？

Do you call upon some skills you developed back then,

你會不會調用一些當年培養的技能。

or what? - Yeah,

還是什麼？

I mean, why I even wanted to do this

我的意思是，為什麼我甚至想這樣做。

is because I got to do action.

是因為我得行動了。

You know, I've worn sort of the,

你知道，我已經穿了那種。

the hat of a founder of a company for like, eight years.

一個公司創始人的帽子一樣，八年。

And so, I'm in endless back-to-back meetings

所以，我在沒完沒了的連軸轉的會議中。

about everything from supply chain, operations.

關於從供應鏈、營運的一切。

- You make it sound so glamorous.

- 你讓它聽起來很有魅力。

- It is not glamorous. (Josh laughs)

- 這並不光彩。（喬希笑）

It's, you know.

這是，你知道的。

And I just needed a break. - Yeah.

我只是需要休息一下- 是啊，我只是需要休息一下。

What's the key for you to looking tough on screen?

你在銀幕上看起來很強悍的關鍵是什麼？

I feel like if I try to look tough,

我覺得如果我試圖讓自己看起來很強硬。

(Jessica laughs) I just end up like,

（傑西卡笑）我只是結束了喜歡。

I ended up like squinting and looking like

我最後就像眯著眼睛一樣，看起來就像

I'm like, losing my vision.

我想，失去了我的視野。

Like, what's your game face

比如，你的遊戲表情是什麼？

look like? - Or like, constipated?

看起來像嗎？- 還是像，便祕的樣子？

- Yeah, like...

- 是啊，就像...

(Jessica chuckles) Like, that's not,

（傑西卡笑）一樣，這不是。

that's not gonna intimidate anybody.

這不是要去恐嚇任何人。

- I think you can't really think about it too much.

- 我覺得你真的不能想太多。

Maybe, maybe that's my problem?

也許，也許這就是我的問題？

Maybe I... - No, that's your gift,

也許我...- 不，這是你的禮物。

you're not thinking about it.

你沒有考慮到這一點。

You just let it happen. - Really?

你只是讓它發生。- 真的嗎？

I don't know, I don't know if I'm

我不知道，我不知道我是不是... ...

(laughing) that threatening though.

雖說威脅性。

- No, you are.

- 不，你是。

Let's be honest. - Oh, good!

我們說實話吧- 哦，好！

- You could kick the shit out of me.

- 你可以把我踢得屁滾尿流。

Let's be honest, you definitely could.

說實話，你絕對可以。

- I could hurt you. (Josh laughs)

- 我可以傷害你。（喬希笑）

I could, I could hurt you, yeah.

我可以，我可以傷害你，是的。

- I feel like that was- - I could take you down.

- 我覺得那是--我可以把你打倒。

I could take you down. - I feel like that

我可以把你打倒。- 我有這種感覺

was a threat.

是一種威脅。

I'm suddenly happy we're doing this remotely.

我忽然很高興我們能遠程操作。

- It's facts, #facts. - Facts (laughs)?

- 這是事實，#事實#。- 事實（笑）？

I have some provocative would you rather questions for you?

我有一些挑釁性的問題，你願意嗎？

You ready? (upbeat TV music)

你準備好了嗎？（歡快的電視音樂）

Would you rather go on an audition every single day

你願意每天都去試鏡嗎？

of your life, or never work again?

你的生活，或者再也不工作了？

- Never work again.

- 再也不工作了。

You learn more about yourself whilst getting rejected,

你在被拒絕的同時，也更加了解自己。

you know? - (laughs) While feeling

你知道嗎？- （笑）而感覺

like a piece of crap.

像個垃圾一樣。

- Yeah. - Would you rather

- 是的，你願意嗎？

run out of toilet paper or wine?

沒紙沒酒

- Toilet paper?

- 衛生紙？

- Yeah, I mean, let's be real,

- 是啊，我的意思是，讓我們成為現實。

it's and essential. - Take a shower.

它的和必要的。- 洗個澡吧

- Yeah (laughs).

- 是啊（笑）。

Would you rather sit next to a crying baby

你願意坐在一個哭泣的嬰兒旁邊嗎？

dressed it as an adult on a plane,

把它打扮成一個成年人在飛機上。

or sit next to a crying adult in a diaper on a plane?

還是在飛機上坐在一個穿著尿布的哭鬧的成年人旁邊？

- Crying baby dressed as an adult, all day long.

- 哭鬧的嬰兒打扮成大人，一天到晚。

I never wanna be next to an adult in a diaper

我可不想和一個穿著尿布的大人在一起。

ever. - Yep, that's...

曾經。- 是的，那是...

It raises- - I mean, it's fine,

我的意思是，它的罰款。

it's fine if they wear like, their clothing over.

它的罰款，如果他們穿喜歡， 他們的衣服了。

So like, "Shh."

所以就像，"噓"。

but if it's like- - Visible on the outside?

No, you don't want that.

不，你不希望這樣。

That's, that's dark stuff.

那是，那是黑暗的東西。

Would you rather have to always wear the Sue Storm wig,

你寧願一直戴著蘇風暴假髮。

or your "Sin City" leather chaps?

還是你的 "罪惡之城 "皮褲？

- The wig is easy.

- 假髮很容易。

I could do the wig.

我可以做假髮。

The chaps are just not that comfortable.

小褲褲就是沒那麼舒服。

- Would you rather always be on the verge of a sneeze,

- 難道你寧願總是在打噴嚏的邊緣。

or continually non-stop be passing gas?

或不斷地不停地被傳氣？

- Oh, jeez. - Now, it can be silent.

- 哦，天哪。- 現在，它可以是沉默的。

It doesn't need to be a loud passing of gas.

不需要大聲傳氣。

- Oh, I don't, they're both so terrible.

- 哦，我不知道，他們都是如此可怕。

Probably verge of the sneeze.

可能是邊緣的噴嚏。

- Yeah, because the judgment around you, I suppose,

- 是的，因為你周圍的判斷，我想。

when you're constantly

當你經常

passing gas. - I mean, who wants

過氣。- 我的意思是，誰願意

to go through the world just like, funking it up?

去通過世界就像，funking起來？

No, thank you. - Yeah, well, I can tell you

不，謝謝你。- 是啊，我可以告訴你

some stories, trust me.

一些故事，相信我。

Yeah. - Mm.

是的

- This is a random switch, but I'm curious,

- 這是個隨機開關，但我很好奇。

are you the type of person that keeps any keepsakes

你是那種保留任何紀念品的人嗎？

from the jobs?

從工作中?

- No, no. - Really?

- 不，不 真的？

- I should though. - Yeah.

- 我應該雖然。- 是的，我應該。

- Yeah, you know what I stupidly did?

- 是啊，你知道我做了什麼蠢事嗎？

When I was younger, I had so many custom,

年輕的時候，我有很多習俗。

amazing red carpet dresses, and I donated all of them.

驚人的紅毯禮服， 我捐出了所有的人。

'Cause I was like, I was always all about charity,

因為我很喜歡，我一直都是關於慈善的。

and I'm like, "Oh my-" - (laughs) I love that this

我很喜歡，"哦，我的 - （笑）我愛這個

is your big regret (laughs). - I'm so mad!

是你最大的遺憾（笑）。- 我真是瘋了!

'Cause I'm like, I should've just given the charity money-

"因為我想，我應該已經只是給了慈善機構的錢 -

- Oh, I see. - And saved the damn dress.

- 哦，我明白了。- 並保存了那件該死的衣服。

- Yeah, at least you qualified it.

- 是啊，至少你是合格的。

I thought you were going really evil,

我還以為你會很邪惡呢

and being like, "Screw the charity!

並像，"螺絲的慈善機構！

"I want my pretty dress! (laughs)"

"我要我的漂亮裙子！（笑）"我要我的漂亮裙子！（笑）"

- Dammit!

- 該死的！

- Should we play some classic charades, Jessica?

- 我們要不要玩一些經典的猜字遊戲，傑西卡？

What do you think?

你覺得呢？

- Sure, why not? (upbeat TV music)

- 當然，為什麼不呢？（歡快的電視音樂）

Okay. (clock ticking)

好吧。（時鐘滴答聲）

What are you?

你是什麼人？

You're a bird, you're a bird!

你是一隻鳥，你是一隻鳥!

A bird, you're swimming, dolphin, Flipper!

鳥兒，你在游泳，海豚，鰭鰭！

(bell dings)

（鐘聲）

- Yes. - Nice.

- 是的 很好

Okay, my turn.

好吧，輪到我了。

Oh, okay. (comic whoosh)

哦，好吧。（漫畫嗖）

(clock ticking) - Two words.

(時鐘滴答聲)--兩個字。

Movie.

電影。

Five, hand, two hands?

五，手，兩手？

Second word is hand.

第二個字是手。

Second word is 10? - No, you were, you were-

第二個字是10？- 不，你是，你是...

- Second word is hand,

- 第二個字是手。

second word is hand, okay. (Josh laughs)

第二個詞是手，好嗎。（喬希笑）

"Idle Hands"!

"閒不住的手"!

(bell dings) - Yes (laughs).

是的（笑）。

I didn't, I had no idea how I was gonna do idle.

我沒有，我不知道該怎麼做空轉。

That's, that's a hard one.

這，這是個難題。

(both laugh) That is, that is.

(兩人笑)那是，那是。

It's like a driving, idling in the car.

就像開車，在車上閒逛。

I don't know. - Yeah, yeah.

我不知道，是啊，是啊。- 是啊，是啊。

Let's do another one for one more round, okay?

我們再來一輪，好嗎？

Okay, cool, ready? - Yup.

好了，冷靜，準備好了嗎？- 準備好了

(clock ticking) One word,

(時鐘滴答聲)一個字。

it's a movie.

這是一部電影。

Fights. (Josh humming)

戰鬥。（喬希哼）

Tennis?

網球？