and started breaking stuff,

並開始打碎東西。

I would, "Ladies, let's get in formation,

我會說："女士們，我們排好隊吧。

and kill some people."

並殺死一些人。"

And they would run into that shelf,

他們會跑到那個架子上。

and one of the Barbies would fall,

而其中一個芭比娃娃會掉下來。

And I would like...

我想...

And just like cartwheel across the room

就像在房間裡翻滾一樣

and (beep)ing, snap necks.

和(嗶)ing，扣脖子。

Hi, it's Trixie Mattel.

嗨，我是崔西-馬特爾。

And I'm Katya.

我是卡佳

And we are two queens who like to watch.

而我們是兩個喜歡看的女王。

And today we're watching some

今天我們要看一些

of the best fights from Cobra Kai.

眼鏡蛇凱的最佳戰鬥。

Do you know what karate means?

你知道空手道是什麼意思嗎？

No.

不知道

"Empty hand."

"空手。"

Really?

真的嗎？

My dad's a karate master, like legit.

我爸爸是空手道大師，是合法的。

But you skimmed a little info off the top.

但你把上面的資訊略去了一點。

You skimmed it, you didn't read it.

你只是瀏覽了一下，你沒有讀過。

No, I did the whole thing.

不，我做了整個事情。

I was one step before a black belt.

我比黑帶還早一步。

That is so your vibe.

這就是你的氣質。

Like, committing to the point where it might mean something,

就像，承諾到這一點，它可能意味著什麼。

and then you're like, "Mmm..."

然後你就會說 "嗯..."

And then, "Peace."

然後，"和平"。

Spoilers ahead.

前面有劇透。

There is karate, but there is so much more.

有空手道，但還有很多。

You know what the best thing about doing karate was?

你知道做空手道最好的事情是什麼嗎？

Tell me.

告訴我

Seeing adult males nude in the locker room.

在更衣室看到成年男性裸體。

The first time I walked into the locker room,

我第一次走進更衣室的時候。

I was confronted with a hairy, adult naked male.

我面對的是一個毛茸茸的成年裸男。

And I saw his (beep) and balls, right in front of me.

我看到他的（嗶）和蛋蛋，就在我面前。

And I thought, "Wow."

我想，"哇"。

"Oh, wow."

"哦，哇。"

Was it your dad?

是你爸爸嗎？

No.

不知道

We're starting with a flashback to the original fight

我們先來回顧一下最初的戰鬥吧。

that caused all this trauma for Mr. Lawrence.

給勞倫斯先生造成了這麼大的創傷。

Elisabeth Shue.

Elisabeth Shue.

She's back from the future!

她從未來回來了！

Did you ever wear these outfits?

這些衣服你穿過嗎？

Did you wear like, the headband and like?

你有沒有穿喜歡，頭帶和喜歡？

No headband, but we had the, it's called the gi.

沒有頭帶，但我們有，這叫吉。

"Gi."

"Gi."

- Ooh. - Ooh.

- 哦。 哦。- 哦。 哦。

What if he just leaned in

如果他只是靠在

and started sucking the blood out of that nose?

然後開始吸那鼻子裡的血？

He's conflicted, he's like, "I know I shouldn't do it,

他很矛盾，他說："我知道我不應該這麼做。

but I'm trying to win."

但我想贏。"

Why you gotta blow up my spot?

你為什麼要炸掉我的位置？

I've got Johnny Lawrence coming up,

我已經得到了約翰尼・勞倫斯來了。

he's had a terrible day,

他有一個可怕的一天。

but he steps in to defend his new neighbor, Miguel.

但他卻出面保護他的新鄰居，米格爾。

Wait a minute,

等一下

this is the real actor from the original program.

這是真正的演員 從原來的程序。

It's brute time.

這是蠻橫的時間。

Do straight people act like this?

直人都是這樣的嗎？

Hey, watch your car, man.

嘿，小心你的車，夥計。

Explains why he smells like (beep).

解釋了為什麼他聞起來像（嗶）。

"That's why he smells like (beep)."

"這就是為什麼他聞起來像（嗶）。"

Is he about to whoop their asses?

他是要打他們的屁股嗎？

He starts with a kick.

他先是一腳。

Wait a minute.

等一下

Is this a show about an adult whooping the asses of kids?

這是個關於大人打小孩屁股的節目嗎？

Because I am so here for this.

因為我就是為了這個而來。

You're like.

你就像。

The next person who's like, you're in a shopping mall

下一個人誰的喜歡，你在商場裡

and someone goes like, "Queer,"

有人去喜歡，"同志"

imagine if you just got to turn and go,

想象一下，如果你只是得到了 轉身就走。

"Not on my watch," and then, "wh-pshh."

"不是在我的手錶，"然後，"wh -pshh。"

"Who, who, psh!"

"誰，誰，噓！"

What's the matter, having trouble breathing?

怎麼了，呼吸困難？

Ooh, ooh.

哦，哦。

This is fierce.

這可真夠猛的。

I love fighting.

我喜歡戰鬥。

He said (beep) them kids.

他說（嗶）他們這些孩子。

Would that be you if you got attacked?

如果你被攻擊了，那會是你嗎？

Do you have like, sleeper soldier karate?

你有喜歡的，臥鋪兵空手道？

I think so.

我想是的

I mean, I think I have arthritis though.

我的意思是，我認為我有關節炎，雖然。

I'm old.

我老了

Well, did you see him, his first kick?

你看到他的第一腳了嗎？

He was like, "Ow, ow."

他當時想，"嗷，嗷。"

Yeah, it'd take me a couple to get warmed up,

是啊，我得花幾個月的時間才能熱起來。

and then I think I'd get the fire of the devil in my eyes.

然後我想我的眼睛裡會有魔鬼的火焰。

I'm so into that.

我很喜歡這個。

(Beep) everyone.

(嗶)各位。

If I knew karate, I'd be in prison.

如果我會空手道，我就會進監獄了。

'Cause I'd have killed about 15 people with this foot.

因為我這一腳就能殺死15個人。

Face me, bow.

面對我，鞠躬。

All right, so up next we got Aisha,

好了，接下來是Aisha。

who's joining because she's been bullied a lot.

她加入是因為她經常被人欺負。

But, does she have what it takes to whoop ass?

但是，她有什麼本事能把屁股打爛嗎？

Face each other.

互相面對。

We should start all of our recordings that way.

我們應該以這種方式開始我們所有的錄音。

Yes, we should, yes, bowing, yeah.

是的，我們應該，是的，鞠躬，是的。

I'm sorry.

我很抱歉

Oh, my God, Aisha, are you okay?

哦，我的上帝，Aisha，你還好嗎？

What?

什麼？

So she could have just broken a bunch of his ribs.

所以她可能只是打斷了他的一堆肋骨。

She said, "I'm about to snap your (beep)ing vertebrae."

她說："我就要把你的(嗶)ing椎骨打碎了。"

You know that billboard with a big ass (beep) on it?

你知道那個有大屁股（嗶）的廣告牌嗎？

Coming up, we're gonna see Miguel kicking some ass

接下來，我們將看到米格爾踢一些屁股。

in the cafeteria.

在食堂。

Why don't you shut the hell up

你為什麼不閉嘴呢？

and stop being such an (beep)hole.

不要再做這樣的（嗶）洞。

Ooh.

哦。

You want another beat down, Rio?

你還想再捱打嗎 理央?

It's Cobra Kai.

是眼鏡蛇凱。

Oh, my God.

哦，我的上帝。

Whoop ass.

Whoop ass.

I should have learned karate.

我應該學空手道的

Drag is so stupid and this is so cool.

拖拽是如此愚蠢，這是太酷了。

The way I would waste people left and right for no reason.

我會無緣無故的左右浪費人的方式。

Then you'd just be antagonizing people,

那你就只能和別人對立了。

innocent people.

無辜的人。

I would be in federal prison

我會被關進聯邦監獄

for killing people.

因為殺人。

With style.

有風格。

Nobody kicks anybody.

誰也別想踢誰

Oh yes, they do.

哦，是的，他們做的。

Look at the material.

看材料。

Ooh, I love the tray, the tray work.

哦，我喜歡這個托盤，托盤的工作。

I don't condone violence.

我不寬恕暴力。

I would love to see a really good fight in real life.

我很想在現實生活中看到一場真正精彩的戰鬥。

Oh, bitch, I'll be on a table

哦，婊子，我會在桌子上。

screaming "WorldStar," louder than you've ever heard.

尖叫著 "世界之星"，比你聽到的還要響亮。

Have you ever seen a real fight in school?

你見過學校裡真正的打架嗎？

It's a lot of t-shirt pulling.

扯了很多T恤。

It's a lot of laying down.

這是個很好的鋪墊。

It's so messy.

太亂了

People go to the ground instantly,

人瞬間就倒地了。

and they're just grabbing, grabbing.

他們只是抓住，抓住。

I would like to hit people, but not get hit.

我想打人，但不被打。

Is there a version of karate that's that?

有一個版本的空手道是這樣的嗎？

Karate.

空手道

That's right, right?

對吧？

This is it.

就是這裡了

We got Johnny's son against Miguel,

我們讓強尼的兒子和米格爾對陣。

which is Johnny's like, star student.

這是約翰尼的喜歡，明星學生。

Fight.

打。

Do they ever just like,

他們是否曾經只是喜歡。

like land a little slap?

像土地一個小巴掌？

Slap.

啪啪啪

Yeah, is it ever like, "huh, huh, huh, woosh?"

是啊，它是曾經像，"呵呵，呵呵，呵呵，哇哦？"

Or like a?

還是像個?

Cobra Kai, Cobra Kai!

眼鏡蛇凱，眼鏡蛇凱！

This is continuing the rivalry for a next season.

這是在延續下賽季的競爭。

So, we're going into season two,

所以，我們要進入第二季了。

and we've got a little sensei fight brewing.

我們已經得到了一個小 sensei戰鬥醞釀。

Ooh, look at that wall.

哦，看那面牆。

"Strike first, strike hard, no mercy."

"先下手為強，不留情面。"

That's me trying to pick up guys.

那是我想搭訕的人。

Still got that hot temper, huh?

脾氣還是那麼火爆，是吧？

That's the guy that trained him.

就是那個訓練他的人。

Yeah.

是啊。

Oh, ooh, his gum fell out.

哦，哦，他的口香糖掉了。

Into the trash.

扔進垃圾桶。

Oh, fire. It was a cigar.

哦，火。那是一根雪茄

It was a lit cigar.

那是一支點燃的雪茄。

Oh, that was crazy.

哦，那是瘋狂的。

Things are about to get a little wet up in there.

事情要變得有點溼在那裡。

Coming up, Tory with a "y."

來了，保守黨與 "Y"。

She can sure kick some ass.

她肯定會踢一些屁股。

The nerve of being someone who says, "It's Tory...

膽大包天的人說："這是保守黨... ...

with a y."

與y。"

Game on.

遊戲開始

Oh (beep).

哦（嗶）。

Whoa.

哇。

Face grab.

搶臉。

He just got the biggest (beep) from that.

他只是從中得到了最大的（嗶）。

Fellas, is it gay to let a girl

夥計們，這是基佬讓一個女孩。

beat the (beep) out of you?

揍得你滿地找牙？

Fighting in the sand is a whole 'nother animal.

在沙地裡打仗是另一種動物。

Okay, so Robby knows his little friends are doing crimes,

好吧，所以羅比知道他的小夥伴們在犯罪。

but Danny is intervening 'cause he's got the moves.

但丹尼是干預 因為他有動作。

Oh my God, fierce.

哦，我的上帝，激烈的。

Is old guys beating up kids kinda hot?

老人打小孩還挺火的嗎？

Absolutely.

絕對的

It is a little.

這是一個小。

(Beep) them kids.

（嗶）他們的孩子。

I have to say, I know it doesn't matter,

我不得不說，我知道這並不重要。

but both these men

但這兩個人

look great for their age,

在他們的年齡看起來很不錯。

- Yeah. - 'cause they were

- 是的，因為他們是

in those movies in the (beep)ing 80s.

在這些電影中，在（嗶）80年代。

They look great.

他們看起來很好。

Well, their training is paying off

好吧，他們的訓練是有回報的

because they get to show their stuff

因為他們可以展示他們的東西

in a wonderful mall fight.

在精彩的商場鬥爭中。

Oh, my God.

哦，我的上帝。

Oh, my God.

哦，我的上帝。

There's not a lot of mall security at this mall.

這家商場的商場保全不多。

No.

不知道

What?

什麼？

He like, swatted him out of the way.

他就像，把他甩開了。

Yes.

是的，我知道

Okay, so this is a scene where one of these actors

好吧，所以這是一個場景，其中一個這些演員

is one of the original Cobra Kai boys

是眼鏡蛇凱的原班人馬之一

from the original film.

從原片中。

And, in real life the actor had cancer

而且，在現實生活中，這位演員得了癌症

and he's eulogized here by joining the cast.

他在這裡加入了演員的行列而被謳歌。

Isn't it great?

這不是很好嗎？

You could suck my (beep).

你可以吸我的（嗶）。

Oh.

哦。

♪ This is the fight song ♪

這是戰鬥的歌曲

They're just fighting the whole bar, huh?

他們只是在打整個酒吧，嗯？

They're just like, "Anybody else?"

他們只是想，"還有誰？"

"Here's a drink, sis."

"姐姐，來一杯。"

Ooh, he's still got it with the ladies.

哦，他仍然得到了它與女士。

This is a very violent town.

這是一個非常暴力的城市。

Yeah, big time attitude problems.

是啊，大時代的態度問題。

Is anybody safe?

有人安全嗎？

Do you have to learn karate to survive?

你一定要學空手道才能生存嗎？

A lot of tough personalities where these kids live.

這些孩子生活的地方有很多強硬的個性。

Samantha LaRusso.

Samantha LaRusso.

So, big finish here.

所以，這裡的大結局。

The battle royale at the high school.

高校的戰鬥力。

I'm coming for you, bitch.

我來找你了，婊子。

Oh yes, intercom.

哦，對了，對講機。

High school on TV is crazy.

電視上的高中是瘋狂的。

"I've got you this time, bitch."

"這次我抓住你了，婊子。"

There was no chance you could ever

你不可能有機會

have gotten even close to the intercom.

甚至已經接近了對講機。

This is high stakes.

這是高風險。

This is drama.

這是戲劇性的。

My dumbass would have been National Honor Society,

我的傻子應該是國家榮譽協會。

like, "There's no running."

就像，"有沒有運行。"

Oh, my God.

哦，我的上帝。

Get back in there.

回到那裡。

Oh, they pushed her back in.

哦，他們把她推回去了。

Oh, no.

哦，不

Oh, my God, even the nerds are going ham.

哦，我的上帝，連書呆子都要去火腿。

Why is everyone fighting?

為什麼大家都在打架？

Oh, you want some of this.

哦，你想要一些這個。

Aisha said, "No, ma'am."

阿伊莎說："不，夫人。"

This is so wild.

這真是太瘋狂了。

Where are the teachers?

老師在哪裡？

This is fierce.

這可真夠猛的。

You have to appreciate how long it must've taken them

你要明白他們一定花了很久的時間

to choreograph all this.

來編排這一切。

I did a fight scene in Hurricane Bianca.

我在《颶風比安卡》裡拍了一場打鬥戲。

It was the funnest thing I ever did.

這是我做過的最有趣的事情。

Well to be fair, it wasn't in the script.

好吧，公平地說，這不是在劇本中。

You just started hitting people.

你剛開始打人。

You want to talk pent up aggression.

你想說的是你積攢了大量的攻擊性。

You wanna feel this?

你想感受一下嗎？

Through the glass case, please.

請透過玻璃箱

Yes.

是的，我知道

Is that the only way you know how to fight, dirty?

這就是你唯一知道如何戰鬥的方法嗎，骯髒？

There are no rules.

沒有規矩不成方圓。

Oh, (beep).

哦，（嗶）。

Someone's gonna die.

有人會死的

All these kids are going to jail after this.

這些孩子在這之後都要進監獄了。

I know.

我知道，我知道

Oh, God, damnit.

哦，上帝，該死的。

Oh, finally the police came.

哦，終於警察來了。

Now a police officer?

現在是警察了？

Bitch, Cobra Kai is fabulous.

婊子，眼鏡蛇凱是美妙的。

You wanna talk drama?

你想談談戲劇嗎？

You wanna talk relationship,

你想談戀愛

not even triangles.

甚至不是三角形。

Parallelograms?

平行四邊形？

Squares.

方塊。

Straight people are wildin' out.