- [Narrator] Hey, Psych2Goers.

Welcome back to another video.

To start off,

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Psych2Go's mission is to make psychology

and mental health more accessible to everyone.

Now, back to the video.

Have you ever put someone down

for their appearance or intellect?

Emotional abuse is one of

the more common forms of abuse

that uses behavioral or emotional tactics

to gain a sense of control,

or to maintain the upper hand in a relationship.

It may be subtle and hard to recognize

since it often gets swept under the rug

as just a part of normal disagreements.

Before we begin,

we would like to mention

that this video is for educational purposes only

and is not intended to offend

or trigger any of our audiences.

This video is created so that

anyone who sees themselves in these behaviors

can use this information

to improve their relationships and lives.

With that said,

here are seven signs

you might be emotionally abusive.

Number one, you jokingly insult people.

Have you ever made a joke

with the intention of hurting the person

you're making fun of?

While family and friends may enjoy

playful banter with each other,

teasing and playful put downs

can end up crossing the line

into emotional abuse

when the jokes become aggressive,

and used intentionally to send

a negative and hurtful message across.

This especially applies

when you continue teasing the person

or brush it off as only a joke,

even though they've told you to stop

and that your comments have become hurtful.

Number two, you dismiss others' feelings.

Have you ever purposefully

ignored or dismissed how someone felt

because you thought they deserved it?

Everyday life can sometimes be so hectic,

you lose sight of what's happening

in other peoples' lives.

After all, you can't know

how your loved ones are feeling all the time.

But not recognizing someone's feelings

may become emotionally abusive

when you tell them their feelings are wrong,

or that they have no right to be so upset.

This psychological invalidation

of brushing someone's feelings off

as irrelevant or dramatic

can lead to feelings of rejection,

alienation and depression.

Number three, you like to embarrass others.

Do you bring up someone's embarrassing moments

to make them feel guilty or ashamed?

Have you ever humiliated someone out of anger

or because you feel threatened?

It's one thing to laugh about the past moments

in a fun and loving way,

but this may quickly become emotional abuse

when you go out of your way to humiliate them

as a way of punishment

or a reminder that you are the one

in control in your relationship.

Humiliating someone in front of people

or when they've asked for you to stop

can be incredibly damaging

for their mental and emotional wellbeing.

Number four, you like to push buttons.

Did you know that constantly doing and saying things

to get others to react

is also a form of emotional abuse?

Doing unpredictable things

to keep the other person on their toes

can be a form of emotional abuse.

Instead of being spontaneous

to do things you both enjoy,

you may use this unpredictable tactic

to say or do things to purposefully

anger and upset them,

especially in front of other people.

This may include broadcasting

a secret they told you in confidence,

or making social media posts

you know that will trigger them.

Number five, you tell people

their version of reality is wrong.

Have you ever dismissed someone's experience as imagined?

Gaslighting is a psychological term

for negating someone else's reality

and it involves intentional using

someone's words, feelings, or actions against them.

The goal is to completely discredit anything

the other person has to say,

so that the abuser can maintain

control over the narrative.

This may include telling them they are crazy,

accusing them of lying,

or making decisions for them without their input.

Number six, you use your emotions

to get people to do what you want.

Have you intentionally made someone feel guilty

just to get your way?

Expressing your emotions can be great

for your mental health.

Appropriate self-expression

facilitates open communication

and prevents many resentments.

However, unleashing your emotions becomes destructive

when you use it to manipulate another person.

This may include impulsive shouting or screaming,

using threats or ultimatums,

blaming them for fights you started,

or using information they've

told you in confidence against them

to maintain control and power.

Number seven, you use silence as a weapon.

Are you the type who deals with conflict

by shutting down

and running the other direction?

Have you ever used the silent treatment on others

to get what you want?

Emotional withholding,

a form of emotional abuse that involves

using affection, validation, love and praise,

against someone is a form of emotional abuse

that includes what you might know as

the silent treatment.

Although it's normal for any relationship

to go through periods of silence,

it may become abusive when you start to use it

as a way to punish, control, or manipulate.

Withholding affection or positive emotion

through the silent treatment

is a toxic way to gain

the upper hand in any relationship.

This also includes talking

to everyone about the issue,

except the other person involved

or wanting the other person

to feel bad or guilty.

Do you relate to any of the signs mentioned here?

If so, what do you plan to do next?

Tell us in the comments below.

If you find this video insightful,

please like and share it with others

who may benefit from it.

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All the references used

are also added in the description box below.

Thank you for watching

and we'll see you in our next video.