We're given stories about what the perfect life looks like and some of those stories work for some people some of the time but not all of us all of the time.

我們被賦予了關於完美生活的故事。其中一些故事對某些人來說，有些時候是有效的。 但並不是所有的人都會這樣做。

There's no checklist that each of us should tick off in order to live a perfect life.

我們每個人都不應該在清單上打勾。以期過上完美的生活。

One of the myths is that being rich will make you happy.

誤區之一是，有錢就會幸福。

It's certainly true that being poor makes you miserable.

窮則獨善其身當然是真的。

Once you get to about £30-40,000 a year certainly £50,000 at most, you've probably reached the peak of happiness by income.

一旦你到了大約30-40,000英鎊的年薪。當然最多五萬英鎊。 從收入上看，你可能已經達到了幸福的頂峰。

And actually more money after that point might not just make you no happier but actually might make you more miserable.

而實際上更多的錢在這之後可能不只是讓你不快樂 但實際上可能會讓你更痛苦。

It's addictive.

這是會上癮的。

You get sucked in and you need more and more and more to be happy.

你會被吸進去，你需要更多更多的快樂。

So the best approach is not to say: "more please" but just to say: "just enough".

所以最好的辦法就是不要說："請再來點"但只是想說，"夠了"。

Another myth is that you need a successful career to be happy.

另一個神話是，你需要一個成功的事業才能幸福。

You certainly need some status in your life but again, you can become addicted and get too much.

你的生活當然需要一些地位但又會上癮，得過且過。

It's interesting that the jobs we're told to aspire to, being a banker, being a lawyer, actually don't make people that happy.

有趣的是，我們被告知要嚮往的工作。作為一個銀行家，作為一個律師， 其實不會讓人那麼開心。

Certainly no happier than being a hairdresser or a florist where some of the evidence suggests that people working in those jobs are actually happier.

當然不比做美髮師和花藝師更開心了其中一些證據表明 從事這些工作的人其實更快樂。

Now, it might be that happier people go into those jobs in the first place but there are important dimensions and attributes of those jobs that lend themselves to being happy.

現在，可能是更快樂的人首先會去做這些工作吧但這些工作有其重要的維度和屬性。 適合自己快樂的。

You're working with people that you like being with, you can see the fruits of your labour, all of these things are good characteristics of a good job.

你在和你喜歡的人一起工作。你可以看到你的勞動成果。 凡此種種，都是好工作的特點。

A good job in so far as it makes you feel good and not just how much you earn and how much status you have in it.

稱心如意而不僅僅是你賺了多少錢，你在其中有多少地位。

One of the things that we need to achieve in order to lead the perfect life is to fall in love by finding 'the one'.

我們需要實現的事情之一是以期過上完美的生活 就是通過找到'那個人'來談戀愛。

What nonsense.

真是胡說八道。

First of all, 'the one' doesn't exist. There's many 'the ones'.

首先，"那個人 "並不存在。有很多 "那個"。

There's many people that would be perfectly suitable for you.

有很多人都會非常適合你。

Once you've found them, the idea that you should be in love with them, passionate love with them, forever, is actually dysfunctional.

一旦你發現他們。的想法，你應該愛上他們。 與他們的熱戀，永遠。 其實是不正常的。

Passionate love, in any normally functioning relationship dies after a year or two and that turns to companionate love and that's healthy because it enables you to then move on and do things in life, maybe have children, pursue projects.

激情的愛，在任何正常運作的關係中。年久失修 變成了伴侶之愛 那是健康的，因為它使你能夠繼續前進 並在生活中做事。

Maybe have children, pursue projects.

也許有孩子，追求項目。

Passion ought to die in functional relationships.

激情應該死在功能關係中。

It's a massive story that you should still be in passionate love with someone after a decade or two.

這是個龐大的故事，你應該還在在十幾二十年後與某人熱戀。

You should be in love with them, but in a slightly different way.

你應該愛上他們，但方式略有不同。

One of the stories that we're told from a very early age is that we need to get married.

我們從小就被告知的一個故事。是，我們需要結婚。

It's the checklist of things that you need achieve in order to grow up.

這是成長過程中需要實現的事情清單。

Well again, marriage can make some people happy, some of the time but not all of the people all of the time.

好吧，再一次，婚姻可以使一些人幸福，一些時間。但並不是所有的人都能做到。

One of the things that a fully-fledged grown-up does is have children, right?

一個成熟的成年人會做的事情之一是是有孩子，對嗎？

That's what people are expected to do.

這是人們應該做的。

And it's true that many people want children, of course many people have children, but some people don't want them.

而且確實很多人都想要孩子。當然很多人都有孩子。 但有些人不想要它們。

One of the things that's expected of us when we have children is that our children will make us happy, not just some of the time but all of the time.

當我們有了孩子之後，我們所期待的事情之一是：是我們的孩子會讓我們幸福。 不只是一些時間，而是所有的時間。

The evidence tells us, quite clearly I think, that children do bring us moments of joy, they can also feel quite purposeful but they bring long periods of stress, anxiety and worry that wouldn't have happened had you not had them.

證據告訴我們，我想很清楚。孩子們確實給我們帶來了歡樂的時刻。 他們也會覺得很有意義 但它們帶來的是長期的壓力、焦慮和擔心 如果你沒有他們，就不會發生這種事。

And that's fine, that's what children do.

這很好，這就是孩子們做的事。

The myth of these stories is that everybody needs to lead the same life.

這些故事的神話是每個人都需要過同樣的生活。

It leads us to judge other people that live their lives differently to us and we shouldn't.

它導致我們去判斷別人他們的生活與我們不同，我們不應該。

Each of us needs to find our own route to happiness.

我們每個人都需要找到自己的幸福路線。

There's no one-size-fits-all narrative.

沒有一個放之四海而皆準的說法。