For the first time ever, Time magazine has named someone there Kid of the year.

時代雜誌有史以來第一次將某人評為年度最佳兒童。

She's a 15 year old scientist and inventor from Colorado named Gitanjali Row.

她是一位來自科羅拉多州的15歲的科學家和發明家，名叫吉坦賈利-羅。

She's very impressive.

她非常令人印象深刻。

They apparently considered over 5000 nominees before choosing a winner.

他們顯然在選擇獲獎者之前考慮了超過5000名候選人。

One of those nominees actually contacted our show to ask if he could come on to give a quick congratulations to Gitanjali.

其中有一位被提名人居然聯繫我們的節目，問他能不能上場給吉檀迦利祝賀一下。

I thought that was very nice.

我覺得這很好。

So here he is.

所以他在這裡。

Please welcome.

請歡迎。

Feign Montgomery feign.

佯裝蒙哥馬利佯裝。

Hello.

你好啊

This is very nice of you.

你真好

I understand you want to personally congratulate times Official kid of the year.

我知道你想親自祝賀時代官方的年度最佳孩子。

Yeah, not really, Cone.

是啊，不盡然，柯恩。

And that's just something I said to get past your producer.

而這只是我說的讓你的製片人過去的事情。

Oh, you don't wanna congratulate the winner.

哦，你不會想恭喜贏家吧？

You are you upset you didn't win or something you think actually wasn't even nominated?

你是你沒有得獎還是什麼你認為其實根本就沒有被提名的東西，你不高興嗎？

Even though I'm 1000 times better than every other kid out there, including the so called winner.

儘管我比其他所有的孩子都強1000倍，包括所謂的冠軍。

What means so called winner.

什麼叫所謂的贏家。

I mean, she invented a device that detects lead in drinking water, so she seems like a perfect choice.

我是說，她發明了一種檢測飲用水中鉛含量的設備 所以她似乎是個完美的選擇 I mean, she invented a device that detects lead in drinking water, so she seems like a perfect choice.

Yawn, Conan, you know, it's actually difficult sneaking laxatives into my dad's drinking water without noticing.

哈欠，柯南，你知道嗎，在我爸的飲用水裡偷偷放瀉藥而不被發現，其實很難。

I've already done that, like eight times this week.

我已經做了，像八次這個星期。

Guess where he is right now.

猜猜他現在在哪裡？

I don't really know or care sitting on the camp.

我真的不知道，也不關心坐在營地裡。

Okay?

好嗎？

You know thing that's just a prank.

你知道那只是一個惡作劇。

That's a mean prank.

這是一個卑鄙的惡作劇。

That's not what Kid of the Year Award is all about.

這不是年度最佳兒童獎的意義所在。

My dad's already been to 12 different doctors, and nobody can figure out what's wrong with his intestines.

我爸爸已經看了12個不同的醫生 沒人能搞清楚他的腸子怎麼了

I'm smarter than 12 doctors, Conan.

我比12個醫生都聰明，柯南。

No, you're not.

不，你不是。

That doesn't make sense.

這說不通啊

This year's winner, she works with genetics and artificial intelligence.

今年的獲獎者，她從事遺傳學和人工智能的工作。

That's real cutting edge science.

這才是真正的尖端科學。

I invented cutting edge science.

我發明了尖端科學。

I've told people my mom's car every day since March.

從3月份開始，我每天都跟別人說我媽的車。

I'm half the reason there was a toilet paper shortage.

我是衛生紙短缺的一半原因。

Now that's kid of the year material.

這才是年度最佳孩子的材料。

Let's just know that's wasteful.

我們只知道那是浪費。

And no, I just forget it.

不，我只是忘了它。

Zane, feign whatever your name is and how many kids know to use a burner phone.

澤恩，裝什麼名字，有多少孩子知道用燒手機。

For all their prank phone calls, I learned that from the wire.

對於他們所有的惡作劇電話，我是從電線上得知的。

You watch the what?

你看什麼？

Your parents let you watch the wire.

你的父母讓你看電線。

Let me.

看著我

How would they know?

他們怎麼會知道？

My mom's always cleaning toilet paper off her car, and my dad's on the can.

我媽媽總是在清理她車上的衛生紙，而我爸爸則在清理罐頭。

Oh yeah, great.

哦，是的，偉大的。

You know what?

你知道嗎？

You're not You're not kid of the year Material feign.

你不是你不是當年的孩子材料裝。

Hey, come on.

嘿，來吧。

I got two kids of the year right here for you.

我這裡有兩個年度最佳孩子給你。

That's that's classy.

那是... ...那是優雅的。

That's great.

那太好了

Feign.

佯裝。

That's really class.

這真的很經典。

Yeah.

是啊。

Do you have any friends, thane?

你有什麼朋友嗎，比恩？

Uh huh.

嗯哼。

Yeah.

是啊。

How many?

有多少人？

Like 12.

就像12歲。

12.

12.

Friend's name.

朋友的名字。

Two of them.

其中兩個。

This one and this one.

這個和這個。

You know what?

你知道嗎？

Okay.

好吧，我知道了

Screw you, thane.

去你的，比恩。

You must get fan, not a fan.

你一定要得到粉絲，而不是粉絲。

Oh!

哦！

Oh, I'll live.

哦，我會活下去的。

I live feign or what am I gonna do without faint is a fan.

我活佯裝還是要做什麼，不昏倒是粉絲。

Hey, Cone And I want to introduce you to two of your biggest fans.

嘿，康恩，我想給你介紹兩位你的忠實粉絲。

One and two.

一和二。

You keep falling for it.

你一直在上當。

Really?

真的嗎？

I didn't fall for you.

我沒有愛上你。

Didn't give me a smart whatever.

沒有給我一個聰明的什麼。

Alright, fame.

好吧，名氣。

Do me a favor, please.

請幫我一個忙

Go right now.

現在就去。

Back to school and get the shit kicked out of you.

回學校去，然後把你的屎踢出去。

Okay?

好嗎？

I can't because of Cove.

我不能因為科夫。

It just don't contact the show again, okay?

就是不要再聯繫節目了，好嗎？