President elect Joe Biden has announced his nomination for head of foreign oil acquisition.

當選總統喬-拜登宣佈了他的外國石油收購負責人提名。

Future Defense Secretary General Lloyd Austin.

未來的國防祕書長勞埃德-奧斯汀。

Austin faces opposition because a law prohibits retired members of the military from serving as defense secretary for seven years unless Congress signs a permission slip for a field trip to conflict of interest Land.

奧斯汀面臨反對，因為法律禁止退役軍人擔任國防部長7年，除非國會簽署許可單，到利益衝突地實地考察。

Also, he is on the board for weapons manufacturer and friend of the show Raytheon.

同時，他也是武器製造商和節目中的朋友雷神公司的董事會成員。

One of the world's largest weapons makers.

世界最大的武器製造商之一。

Austin was Biden second choice.

奧斯汀是拜登的第二選擇。

The first was an ICBM with a six handicap.

第一個是洲際彈道導彈，盤口為六。

Honestly, Richard, isn't it a little immature of us to be so caught up on conflicts of interest?

老實說，理查德，我們這麼糾結於利益衝突是不是有點不成熟？

What are we 12?

我們是什麼12？

What do you think?

你覺得呢？

We'll conflicts of interest are pretty serious.

我們的利益衝突是相當嚴重的。

You know, the defense budget is the biggest in the world, the biggest in human history.

你知道，國防預算是世界上最大的，是人類歷史上最大的。

So three idea that you have civilian control of the military is something that we have held as part of the American culture for a very long time.

所以，三個想法，你有文官控制的軍隊是我們持有的東西，作為美國文化的一部分，很長一段時間。

Respectfully, I think that's nonsense.

恕我直言，我認為這是胡說八道。

Let's just give this to Biden and let the military run itself.

我們把這個交給拜登，讓軍方自己管理。

I'm busy.

我很忙

Just send me a push notification when we're going a war or don't.

我們要打仗的時候就給我發個推送通知，要不就別打了。

I don't need my phone vibrating every 10 seconds.

我不需要我的手機每10秒就振動一次。

I mean, are we forgetting that Biden picked this guy?

我是說 我們是不是忘了拜登選了這個人?

Hello?

喂？

I can't believe we're still arguing over.

我不相信我們還在爭論。

It's a good point that it now Biden is still looking for a Cabinet position for former South Bend mayor and national nephew Pete Buddha.

它現在拜登還在為前南本德市長、國民侄子皮特-佛陀尋找內閣職位，這一點很好。

Judge Axios reports finding a Cabinet position for him has been a challenge.

法官Axios報告說，為他找到一個內閣職位是一個挑戰。

Now, obviously, the sky is the limit for Buddha judge after his experience cooling down the hotheads on the South Bend Chamber of Commerce.

現在，很顯然，在經歷了南本德商會上的熱心人降溫後，佛爺法官的天空是無限的。

Richard, isn't it a waste to use former mayor people, but a judge on a national position?

理查德，用前市長的人，卻用一個國家職務的法官，這不是浪費嗎？

Can't we elevate him to some sort of world president role?

我們不能把他提升到某種世界總統的角色嗎？

Certainly that might be his ambition.

當然，這可能是他的野心。

Uh, if not his qualification.

呃，如果不是他的資質。

Look, if you're Joe Biden and you're on the older side, you've got an ambitious vice president behind you.

聽著，如果你是喬-拜登，而且年齡偏大，你的背後就會有一個雄心勃勃的副總統。

You might be looking to make sure that the other pretenders to the throne are as far away as possible and Beijing is pretty far away.

你可能是想讓其他的裝逼者儘量遠離，而北京是相當遙遠的地方。

An excellent points and to the folks at home.

一個優秀的點，並向家鄉的父老鄉親。

Sorry about that.

抱歉

A lost Dianne Feinstein just wandered in front of the camera Now let me throw this out there.

一個迷路的戴安-范斯坦剛剛在鏡頭前徘徊 現在讓我把這個扔出去。

We could use an ambassador to Chast and Buddha Judge.

我們可以用一個大使去找查斯特和佛判。

Our nation was on shaky ground with him under Trump.

在特朗普的帶領下，我們的國家與他的關係是搖搖欲墜的。

And it's time to course.

而現在是時候課程。

Correct.

好吧，我知道了

Sure.

當然可以

You know, I think he could be pivotal in ending our torture program.

你知道，我認為他可能是關鍵 在結束我們的酷刑計劃。

Where we drag likable spouse is on two year quixotic presidential bids.

我們拖著討人喜歡的配偶的地方，是在兩年的總統競選中。

You know, I wouldn't mind someone with MAWR.

你知道，我不介意有人有MAWR。

Foreign policy chops for ambassador to chastity.

外交政策鑿鑿，為貞節大使。

What's Jon Huntsman up to these days?

喬恩-亨茨曼最近在做什麼？

You know, I'm sure we could find something else for peace.

你知道，我相信我們可以找到其他和平的東西。

I for what?

我為了什麼？

Need help setting up my computer.

需要幫助設置我的電腦。

Great, Great for that.

太好了，太好了

There goes Senator Feinstein again now moving on.

又有參議員費恩斯坦現在繼續前進。

It was a sad day for centrists everywhere as Joe Kennedy, the third delivered farewell remarks after losing his Massachusetts Senate bid, the chamber was nearly empty except for his primary opponent, Ed Markey, seated up in the gallery, eating lobster tails with his butter drenched hands and chartering like a barbarian king.

對於各地的中間派來說，這是一個悲傷的日子，第三位喬-肯尼迪在馬薩諸塞州參議員競選失敗後發表了告別講話，除了他的主要對手埃德-馬基坐在觀眾席上，用他那雙沾滿黃油的手吃著龍蝦尾巴，像一個野蠻人國王一樣特許。

Here is what I know, that we are a complicated and Messi country, that we violated our founding promises Before the ink was dry, we boldly declared we the people and promptly defined We as which rich white Protestant men impressive words.

這是我所知道的，我們是一個複雜的和Messi的國家，我們違反了我們的建國承諾 在墨水未乾之前，我們大膽地宣佈我們是人民，並立即將我們定義為哪些富有的白人新教徒令人印象深刻的話。

They're likely written by the pope.

他們很可能是教皇寫的。

Yep.

是的。

Kennedy.

肯尼迪

They're calling out our country's original institutional exclusion of B I.

他們在呼喚我國原有的制度性排斥B I。

P o.

P o.

C.

C.

Which translates to black and indigenous people.

翻譯過來就是黑人和土著人。

Oh, and Catholics.

哦，還有天主教徒。

Yes.

是的，我知道

It was a bold allusion to the fact that many of the founding fathers own slaves and did not believe in the transubstantiation of the Eucharist.

這是一個大膽的典故，因為許多建國者擁有奴隸，不相信聖體的轉體。

Richard, we have a centrist leaving the house and a White House packed with centrist.

理查德，我們有一箇中間派離開了房子，白宮裡擠滿了中間派。

Is this indicative of the Democratic Party tensions ahead?

這是否表明民主黨未來的緊張局勢？

Or an isolated case of Massachusetts voters?

還是馬薩諸塞州選民的個案？

Prejudice against Solis dorks coasting on name recognition?

對索利斯呆板人的偏見是靠著名氣巧取豪奪？

I think there is a massive battle brewing within the party.

我認為黨內正在醞釀一場大規模的戰鬥。

Uh, in terms of expectations of this new administration and the likely disappointments, they're going to feel very shortly.

呃，在對這個新政府的期望和可能的失望方面，他們很快就會感到。

Well, this is a nightmare.

好吧，這是一個噩夢。

Joe Kennedy.

喬-肯尼迪

The third can't make it in Washington.

第三個不能在華盛頓做。

What chance do I have?

我還有什麼機會？

I'm scum.

我是人渣

I'm gonna order a big toilet and have my family flushed me down.

我要訂一個大馬桶，讓家人把我衝下去。

You need to calm down, Teddy.

你需要冷靜下來，泰迪。

It's the last show of the year and you're acting like a lunatic.

這是今年的最後一場演出，你卻像個瘋子一樣。

Yeah, and there's no toilet that big worst day of my life.

是啊，而且我人生中最糟糕的一天，沒有廁所。

First Kennedy, now toilet now moving on, Most Americans saw 2020 as a year to reach out to the millions in need, while a select bunch saw it as an opportunity to make millions of dollars inside, The Hill is proud to present the top five Griff's of 2020.

先是肯尼迪，現在是馬桶，現在繼續前進，大多數美國人認為2020年是向數百萬需要幫助的人伸出援手的一年，而精選的一群人則認為這是一個在裡面賺取數百萬美元的機會，The Hill很自豪地介紹2020年的五大格里夫。

Coming in at number five is Stephanie Winston Wolkoff, senior adviser to Melania Trump.

排在第五位的是梅拉尼婭-特朗普的高級顧問斯蒂芬妮-溫斯頓-沃爾科夫。

She used her friendship with Melania to score her event planning firm, a $26 million contract for Donald Trump's inauguration, then rehab her reputation by doing the right thing and using secretly recorded tapes of her best friend, Melania, to score a deal for her tell all book affectionately titled Melania and Me.

她利用與梅拉尼婭的友誼為自己的活動策劃公司、唐納德-特朗普就職典禮的2600萬美元的合同打下了基礎，然後通過做正確的事情，用她最好的朋友梅拉尼婭的祕密錄音帶為她的告訴書打下了一份合同，親切地命名為《梅拉尼婭和我》。

If she hadn't done it to Trump's wife, we would all agree she's evil.

如果她沒有對特朗普的妻子下手，我們都會認為她是惡魔。

Dining alone.

獨自用餐。

It's number four.

是四號

We have the Amy McGrath for Senate campaign, who during her Senate race against Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, spent over $90 million on a campaign that lost by more than 417,000 votes.

我們有艾米-麥克格拉斯競選參議員的活動，她在參議院與多數黨領袖米奇-麥康奈爾的競選活動中，花費了超過9000萬美元，以41.7萬多票落敗。

Congratulations to her staff vendors and all those who wrote that racehorse right into a large spike drunkenly stumbling into our number three spot is the Lincoln Project.

祝賀她的員工供應商和所有將那匹賽馬正確寫成大釘子的人醉醺醺地跌入我們的第三位是林肯計劃。

Sure, this is a little personal.

當然，這是一個有點私人的。

We were joined by one of its founders, Rick Wilson, who remains the only guest to tell us to go yourselves in his head.

我們加入了它的創始人之一，裡克-威爾遜，他仍然是唯一一個告訴我們要去他的頭上的客人。

All right, Rick, we know you have to go Hoover up some or Rube cash.

好吧 Rick 我們知道你得去取點Rube的錢了

So that's all the time we have.

所以這就是我們所有的時間。

Thank you to our analysts and guest Rick Wilson of the Lincoln Project.

感謝我們的分析師和林肯計劃的嘉賓裡克-威爾遜。

Thanks a lot, Rick.

非常感謝，裡克。

Thank you so much trick.

謝謝你這麼多的技巧。

But, you know, it turns out the $44 million they spent didn't change any votes.

但是，你知道嗎，事實證明，他們花的4400萬並沒有改變任何選票。

The most viral of the Lincoln projects adds, turned out to be the least persuasive.

最病毒的林肯項目補充道，原來是最沒有說服力的。

At the very least, a bunch of unrepentant Islamophobic warmongers made a lot of money that laying there Tesla in second place is New York Governor Andrew Cuomo.

最起碼，一群不知悔改的伊斯蘭恐懼症暖男賺了不少錢，躺在那裡特斯拉排在第二位的是紐約州長安德魯-庫莫。

Well, grave diggers took a second to stretch their A key muscles.

好吧，掘墓人花了一秒鐘的時間來舒展自己的A鍵肌肉。

Cuomo treated himself to a victory self suck in the form of a book called American Crisis.

庫莫以一本名為《美國危機》的書來對待自己的勝利自吸。

Leadership Lessons From the Cove.

灣的上司經驗。

It 19 Pandemic.

它19大流行。

Since his publication date, New York state cases and deaths have skyrocketed.

自他發表之日起，紐約州的案件和死亡人數急劇上升。

That's like wiping your ass halfway through A and releasing a book called my perfectly clean ass.

這就好比擦屁股擦到一半A就出書了，名字叫《我的完美乾淨的屁股》。

Governor Cuomo is gonna need a refrigerated truck for all that cash and violently shoving themselves into first place.

州長Cuomo需要一輛冷藏車來裝這些現金，並暴力地把自己推到第一位。

Our top grift of 2020 goes to the man who puts the win in Twin Towers.

我們2020年的頭號漂流者是把勝利放在雙塔的人。

Rudy Giuliani.

魯迪-朱利安尼

This sludge soaked pervert has eroded voters faith in democracy and stirred violence among trump voters while taking home legal fees and securing access.

這個沾滿汙泥的變態侵蝕了選民對民主的信心，並在特朗普選民中煽動暴力，同時將法律費用和確保訪問權帶回家。

He will definitely sell and still finding time to attempt both sex with Borat's underage daughter and negligent homicide.

他一定會賣掉，而且還找時間企圖與波拉特的未成年女兒發生性關係和過失殺人。

He is a true inspiration to the next generation of grifters, and that is our top five grifters of 2020 2020 man.

他是真正的激勵下一代的漂泊者，這就是我們2020年五大漂泊者2020人。

Crazy year, huh?

瘋狂的一年，是吧？

I've seen in some ways almost too crazy to put into words.

我在某些方面看到了幾乎瘋狂到無法用語言來表達。

I guess you know when words fail.

我想你知道什麼時候言語不通。

I've always found it helpful to turn to the power of song.

我一直覺得求助於歌曲的力量很有幫助。

Well, moving on this And in a year as crazy as 2020 there is perhaps no better way to sum it up than with an homage to the piano man himself.

好了，繼續說下去，在2020年這樣瘋狂的一年裡，也許沒有比向鋼琴家本人致敬更好的方式來總結了。

Please hit it.

請點擊它。

Terrence E.

Terrence E.

Turn me up, Terrence, turn me up in the microphone.

打開我，泰倫斯，打開我的麥克風。

Terrence Trump Impeachment!

特倫斯-特朗普被彈劾!

Leffler Stock threats to banish TIC tac murder Hornets Tiger Kinga Lane, Maxwell Jail Are I pizza?

勒夫勒股票威脅放逐TIC塔克謀殺案大黃蜂虎金加巷，麥克斯韋監獄我是披薩嗎？

RBG Meg left Royal family Mono lips vaping Kids to join Destroyed the mail.

RBG梅格離開皇室單脣抽吸孩子加盟毀掉郵件。

What?

什麼？

That was really special.

這真的很特別。

Thank you to keep going.

謝謝你繼續走下去。

It was still go.

這還是去。

Goddammit!

該死的！

Craddick primary Luckily, we stop Bernie.

克拉迪克初選幸運的是，我們阻止了伯尼。

Joe Biden Pete Food.

喬-拜登皮特食品。

A judge left Wall Street feeling good.

一名法官離開華爾街時感覺良好。

Joe Kennedy losing of Cuomo nipple ring.

喬-肯尼迪失去了庫莫的乳環。

Harvey Weinstein in jail.

哈維-韋恩斯坦在監獄裡。

I'd help him if I could.

如果可以的話，我一定會幫他。

This year was a dumpster fire.

今年是個垃圾場。

But thanks to my money, it was mostly funny.

但由於我的錢，主要是搞笑。

This year was a dumpster fire, But it's totally random.

今年是個垃圾場，但這完全是隨機的。

You can't blame the system.

你不能責怪系統。

No, no, don't surf.

不，不，不要衝浪。

I really rich.

我真的很有錢。

That's everyone's first idea.

這是大家的第一個想法。

You know, I'm gonna like it.

你知道，我會喜歡它。

Rocks, right?

石頭，對吧？

I wouldn't go that far.

我不會走那麼遠。

Uh, for a two.

呃，對於一個二。

Very nice calm a lot.

很好的平靜很多。

First woman vice Nancy ripped up paper and Mr Peanut died.

第一女副手南希撕了紙，花生先生死了。

Gun couple at the RNC.

共和黨全國委員會的一對持槍夫婦。

I loved hillbilly elegy parasite.

我喜歡鄉下人的輓歌寄生蟲。

Best picture.

最佳影片。

McDonald's cop cried Diane hugging Lindsay Elon Musk robot baby.

麥當勞的警察哭了戴安抱著林賽-埃隆-馬斯克機器人寶寶。

Mitch McConnell.

Mitch McConnell

Those hands are dead.

這些手都是死的。

Fly landed on pences and Newsome card at French laundry.

飛落在法國洗衣店的彭斯和紐森卡上。

We've got to stop L c.

我們必須阻止L C。

Even fucking Goya beans.

甚至他媽的戈雅豆。

Card is gotta, whereas me.

卡是得，而我。

Um, I'm crazy.

嗯，我是瘋了。

Or did you not mention Cove in one?

還是說你沒有在一個人身上提到科夫？

Guess it slipped my mind.

我猜我忘了。

You know, it didn't affect my tax bracket.

你知道，這並沒有影響我的稅率。

E understand.

我明白了。

Relatable.

相關的。

Moving on.

繼續前進。

We here at tuning out the news know that if the last four years have proven anything, it's the vital role of journalism here.

我們在這裡調出新聞知道，如果過去四年證明了什麼，那就是新聞業在這裡的重要作用。

Now, to that most important of missions are just a few of our contributions and a fair share of rivaled horseplay.

現在，對這個最重要的任務，只是我們的一些貢獻和相當一部分的對手馬戲。

Look, I'm making out to James.

你看，我正在和詹姆斯親熱。

Woods is my shepherd.

伍茲是我的牧羊人。

I may have visited, but I never in had all those underage sex slaves More women who have Dale other women.

我可能參觀過，但我從來沒有在有所有這些未成年性奴隸 更多的女人誰有戴爾其他婦女。

I am fresh off the bus from my high powered job in Washington.

我剛從華盛頓的高薪工作中走出來。

Oh, cardi b, will you marry?

哦，心兒B，你願意結婚嗎？

Everything is working.

一切都在工作。

Great Squad.

偉大的團隊。

I fly really high so I can check on the drones.

我飛得很高，所以我可以檢查無人機的情況。

I'm going in.

我要進去了

Come on, Mark, dammit!

來吧，馬克，該死的！

Tranquilizers are effective against Schumer.

鎮定劑對舒默有效。

If you shoot him in the right hair plug, I have to remove it before he removes fate.

如果你射中他的右發塞，我必須在他移除命運之前移除它。

You canceled fish.

你取消了魚。

You know, guys, these troubling times Well, here, little buddy.

你知道，夥計們，這些動盪的時代... ...好吧，給你，小傢伙。

You Robby Mook's data was right.

你羅比穆克的數據是對的。

If need be way will eat the horse.

如果需要的話，辦法會吃馬。

Jesus, who is white came to me and whispered in my ear.

潔白的耶穌來到我面前，在我耳邊低語。

This entire studio is on the back of an 18 wheeler hauling ass there right now.

現在整個工作室都在一輛18輪車的後座上，正往那裡拖著屁股。