TRAVEL THIS PAST THURSDAY.

旅行這個上週四。

THEY'RE SAYING STAY HOME, RESIST TRAVELING LONG DISTANCES FOR

他們說，留在家裡，不要長途旅行... ...

LARGE FAMILY FEASTS.

大家庭的感情。

>> THIS YEAR COVID 19 IS FORCING AMERICANS TO MAKE THE TOUGH

>> 今年COVID 19迫使美國人做出艱難的決定。

DECISIONS TO SKIP THEIR FAMILY'S THANKSGIVING GATHERINGS.

決定跳過家人的感恩節聚會。

WHILE PUMPKIN PIE AND FOOTBALL CAN STILL BE ENJOYED FROM HOME,

在家裡就能享受到餡餅和足球的樂趣。

THANKSGIVING ISN'T THE SAME WITHOUT FAMILY.

沒有家人的感恩節是不一樣的。

INTRODUCING BLOW UP CRAZY UNCLE.

介紹《炸裂瘋狂的叔叔》。

SIMPLY FILL HIM UP WITH AIR, ALONG WITH 10 OUNCES OF JIM

簡單地給他灌滿空氣，再加上10盎司的吉姆。

BEAM, AND LET CRAZY UNCLE DO THE REST.

梁，並讓瘋狂的叔叔做其餘的。

>> WHY SHOULD GAGE BE ALLOWED TO GET MARRIED WHEN WINDHAM WON'T

>> 既然溫德姆不願意，為什麼要允許蓋奇結婚？

EVEN TALK TO ME IN LINE AT THE CAR WASH?

還能在洗車店跟我排隊說話嗎？

I PAID FOR THE HOT WAX.

我花錢買了熱蠟。

>> THANKSGIVING JUST WOULDN'T BE THE SAME WITHOUT QUIETLY

>> 感恩節沒有靜靜地過就不一樣了。

GRITTING YOUR TEETH AND PRAYING FOR IT TO BE OVER.

咬牙切齒地祈禱它結束。

>> SO JOE BIDEN CAN CALL HIMSELF PRESIDENT-ELECT, BUT I CAN'T

>> 所以喬-比登可以自稱當選總統，但我不能... ...

CALL YOUR AUNT RONDA BECAUSE OF THE RESTRAINING ORDER?

因為限制令而給你姨媽RONDA打電話？

DEEP STATE.

深入狀態：

>> AND JUST LIKE YOUR ACTUAL CRAZY UNCLE, HE DOESN'T KNOW

>> 就像你真正的瘋狂的叔叔，他不知道。

WHEN TO LEAVE.

何時離開。

>> IT'S PRONOUNCED KAMALA.

>> 它的發音是KAMALA。

CASA BLANCA?

CASA BLANCA?

NO, IT'S KAMA, THEN LA.

不，是KAMA，然後是LA。

KOOKABURRA?

古河村？

YAHTZEE.

YAHTZEE。

>> THIS IS SETTLERS OF CATAN.

>> 這是 "塔坦的定居者"。

( BELCHES ) >> BLOWUP CRAZY UNCLE.

（BELCHES） >> 炸燬瘋狂的叔叔。

BECAUSE A FAMILY THAT INFLATES TOGETHER CELEBRATES TOGETHER.

因為一個家庭如果一起膨脹，就會一起慶祝。

>> YOU KNOW ANY FEMALE SEX DOLLS YOU CAN SET ME UP WITH?

>> 你知道有什麼女妓可以給我安排嗎？

HELL, GIVE ME A BEACH BALL.

見鬼，給我一個沙灘球。

I'M NOT PICKY.

我不挑剔。

>> Announcer: IT'S "A LATE SHOW" WITH STEPHEN COLBERT.

>> "晚間秀 "由史蒂芬-科爾伯特主持。這是 "晚間秀"，有史蒂芬-科爾伯特。