...that I don't want to be in.

...... 我不想在。

[Natsuki] OHHH, (beep)

[夏樹]OHHH，(嗶嗶聲)

Desperation, it's a powerful motivator.

絕望，是一種強大的動力。

This is my master plan.

這是我的總體規劃。

Six days, and a thousand kilometres through Japan's most mountainous region,

六天時間，穿越日本最深的山區，行程一千公里。

culminating with spectacular views of Mt. Fuji.

以富士山的壯觀景色為高潮。

But why? Why am I so desperate?

但為什麼呢？為什麼我這麼絕望？

Well, in the eight years I've lived in Japan,

我在日本住了8年了

I've still not had a good clear view of Mt. Fuji.

我還是沒有好好的看清楚富士山。

Two years ago, I spent three days at the base of the mountain, just waiting, just trying to get a view.

兩年前，我在山腳下待了三天，只是等待，只是想看個風景。

And all I got, were a bunch of clouds, and a bucket-load of disappointment.

而我得到的，只是一堆雲彩，和一桶失望。

Worse still, nearly every day in the last two years, I've been bullied by viewers, bragging about all the great views of Mt. Fuji they've had.

更糟糕的是，這兩年來，我幾乎每天都被觀眾欺負，吹噓他們看過的富士山的所有美景。

Look at this.

看看這個

"We were only in Japan for two weeks and these were the views we got of Mt. Fuji!!!

"我們只在日本呆了兩個星期，這些就是我們看到的富士山的景色!!!

Please live vicariously through our photo."

請通過我們的照片代入生活。"

No! No I won't!

不，不，我不會！

And that, is why we're going on Journey Across Japan.

而這，就是我們要去日本各地旅行的原因。

We're not going alone either. We are taking Joey the Anime Man.

我們也不是一個人去的。我們要帶著動漫人喬伊去。

Now I'd like to tell you I've chosen Joey because he's a good friend. But really, that has something to do with revenge as well.

現在我想告訴你我選擇喬伊是因為他是個好朋友。但實際上，這也和復仇有關。

You see, two years ago, Joey took me into a dark haunted abandoned tunnel,

你看，兩年前，喬伊把我帶進了一條漆黑的、鬧鬼的廢棄隧道。

and ran off with the torch and left me standing there terrified in the darkness.

然後拿著手電筒跑了，留下我在黑暗中驚恐地站在那裡。

It wasn't pleasant, and I haven't forgotten it. I never forget.

那是不愉快的，我沒有忘記。我永遠不會忘記。

And so this is my chance to get revenge back on Joey, and leave him in a cold dark place as well, so he knows what it feels like.

所以這是我報復喬伊的機會，也讓他在一個冰冷黑暗的地方，讓他知道那種感覺。

So there you have it! This exciting six-day adventure through the stunning mountainous region of central Japan,

這就是你所擁有的!這場激動人心的六天探險之旅，將穿越日本中部迷人的山區。

is built on a foundation of bitterness, resentment and revenge.

是建立在苦悶、怨恨和報復的基礎上。

Welcome to Journey Across Japan: Escape to Mt. Fuji.

歡迎來到 "日本之旅"。逃離富士山。

♪ Journey Across Japan Intro Music ♪

縱橫日本介紹音樂

[Chris] So here he is, the man of the moment, Joey the Anime Man. Welcome to Journey Across Japan, Joey. How you doing?

[克里斯]他來了，當下的男人，動漫人喬伊。歡迎來到 "橫跨日本之旅"，喬伊。你好嗎？

[Joey] Thank you, I'm good, how are you?

謝謝你，我很好，你呢？

-I am so happy, that you are on this journey Joey, I cannot put it into words how happy that I am.

-我很高興，你在這段旅程中，喬伊，我無法用言語表達我有多高興。

-I am also happy that I randomly teleported into your car.

-我也很高興我隨機傳送到你的車上。

-It's magic.

-這是神奇的。

-So yeah, Escape to Fuji. Have you ever been to Fuji or seen- You've been to Fuji, but have you seen Fuji?

-所以，是的，逃離富士。你去過富士，也見過... 你去過富士，但你見過富士嗎？

-Well, I've climbed Mt. Fuji, but I've never had that kind of, picturesque, beautiful view of it.

-好吧，我爬過富士山，但我從來沒有過那種，如詩如畫的美麗景色。

-Oh, from a distance?

-哦，從遠處看？

-That you kind of see in postcards and photos.

-就是你在明信片和照片上看到的那種。

-Oh that's really funny, because I've been to Fuji once, and I got a great view of it-

-哦，這真的很有趣，因為我去過一次富士，我得到了一個很好的景色，

♪ Intense music ♪

激烈的音樂

-I don't know how hard it could be, to just get a view of Fuji.

-我不知道這有多難，只是想看看富士的風景。

-(unintelligible stuttering) Right, well, we've got six days on this trip, and if we don't see Mt. Fuji, I am going to kill the nearest Australian.

-好吧，我們這次旅行有六天時間，如果我們看不到富士山，我就殺了最近的澳大利亞人。

-So pray to god Joey that we see Mt. Fuji, for your sake.

-所以向上帝祈禱，喬伊，我們能看到富士山，為了你。

-Oh, okay, I'm- I'm excited.

-哦，好吧，我... 我很興奮。

-But first things first, let's get some breakfast!

-但首先，讓我們先吃點早餐吧!

-I'm starving!

-我餓死了！

-Wahey! Breakfast time!

-哇哦！早餐時間！

Leaving Tokyo behind, we begin our three-hundred kilometre journey to Yudanaka hot springs in the heart of Nagano prefecture.

離開東京，我們開始了三百公里的旅程，前往位於長野縣中心的湯田中溫泉。

We're gonna stop off half way in Takasaki City to pick up Natsuki, as he joins us for the first few days of the trip.

我們會在高崎市中途停留，去接夏樹，因為他和我們一起參加頭幾天的旅行。

But first things first, we have the daunting task of discovering our challenge of the day.

但首先，我們有一個艱鉅的任務，就是發現我們今天的挑戰。

[Chris] That is a nasty scratch. And it wasn't me!

[克里斯]這是一個討厭的劃痕。而且這不是我！

We've rented a Toyota Sienta, it's a slightly bigger car than I've got, my cars a little bit dirty, a little bit too small.

我們租了一輛豐田西雅特，比我的車稍微大一點，我的車有點髒，有點小。

I thought there's a chance we may have to sleep inside it, my car wasn't very suitable for that.

我想我們有可能要在裡面睡覺，我的車不太適合。

Anyway, we're joined on this trip by Ian from the previous Journey Across Japan, who's the kind of project co-ordinator guy that smooths things over.

不管怎麼說，這次我們的行程中，還有之前橫跨日本之旅的伊恩，他是那種能讓事情順利進行的項目協調人。

And every day of this trip, we're gonna be taking challenges you guys have sent in.

這次旅行的每一天，我們都會接受你們送來的挑戰。

Ian's gonna curate three of his favourites, stick them into here,

伊恩要把他最喜歡的三張照片貼到這裡來。

And then we will spin Anpanman and get those challenges.

然後我們將旋轉安板人，並獲得這些挑戰。

[Joey] *breathless* Jesus Christ-

上帝啊

-Good to see you Ian! And also Tokyo Lens Norm is our assistant camera man. They're gonna be in a separate car helping us along this journey.

-很高興見到你，伊恩！還有東京鏡頭的諾姆是我們的助理攝像師。他們會在一輛單獨的車上幫助我們完成這次旅行

So, what's the first challenge?

那麼，第一個挑戰是什麼？

-Let's find out!

-讓我們來看看！

-Four thousand challenges you guys have sent in the first week. Four thousand. And I hope it's not too difficult, as I'm very tired.

-第一週你們就送來了四千份挑戰書。四千次我希望這不會太難，因為我很累。

We had to get up at like 7am, to drive out of bloody Tokyo. What we got?

我們不得不在早上7點起床，開車離開該死的東京。我們得到了什麼？

-Alright, the very first one is from Calvin A Y, who says, "make a short horror film".

-好吧，第一個是Calvin A Y的，他說，"拍一部恐怖短片"。

-Make a short...

-做一個簡短的...

-Make a short horror film.

-製作一部恐怖短片。

-An entire film?!

-一整部電影？

-An entire film in one day.

-一部完整的電影在一天之內完成。

-We've gotta drive like two-hundred kilometres to Nagano today, and we've got to pick up Natsuki this evening-

-我們今天要開兩百公里的車去長野，今天晚上還要去接夏樹... ...

-Oh yeah.

-哦，是的

-Later on this afternoon. I don't know how we're gonna do it, but we'll see what happens!

-今天下午晚些時候我不知道我們要怎麼做，但我們會看到會發生什麼！

Alright, Journey Across Japan: Escape to Fuji, let's do it, let's go!

好了，橫跨日本之旅。逃往富士山，我們走吧，走吧！

[Chris] So Gunma, very famous, strawberry farm, just up the road.

所以群馬，非常有名的草莓農場，就在路上。

Four different types of strawberries from around the world

世界各地的四種不同的草莓。

-A whole four?

-整整四個？

-What do you reckon?

-你覺得呢？

-(sigh) I don't know if a strawberry farm is exactly the most optimal place to film a horror movie trailer.

-我不知道草莓農場是不是最適合拍攝恐怖電影預告片的地方。

I dunno of any horror movies that are set in a strawberry field.

我不知道有什麼恐怖電影是在草莓田裡拍攝的。

-I dunno what strawberry farms you've been to Joey.

-我不知道你去過什麼草莓農場，喬伊。

-Rather than a strawberry farm though, I know of a better place that is actually a lot closer.

-比起草莓農場，我知道一個更好的地方，其實更近。

-Well, we've arrived, somewhere.

-我們已經到了某個地方了

Not really sure- where are we Joey?

不太確定，我們在哪裡喬伊？

We went through the most terrifying-looking forest I've ever seen.

我們穿過了我見過的看起來最恐怖的森林。

-We're at an abandoned stone quarry.

-我們在一個廢棄的採石場。

-An abandoned quarry?

-一個廢棄的採石場？

-Yeah.

-是的

-Which we can't yet see!

-我們還看不到的東西！

-Yeah, because it's up in the mountains there.

-是的，因為它是在山上，在那裡。

-Brilliant.

-聰明

Are you sure you didn't want to go to the strawberry farm?

你確定你不想去草莓農場？

[Chris] Good god.

[克里斯]好神。

[Joey] This is insane.

這太瘋狂了

This is huge.

這是巨大的。

[Chris] What is this place?

[克里斯]這是什麼地方？

Journey Across Japan? More like Indiana Jones.

穿越日本之旅？更像是印第安納瓊斯。

Looks like something out of the X-Files.

看起來就像《X檔案》裡的東西。

Like a lost remains of an alien city.

就像一座失落的外星城市的遺蹟。

[Joey] It's really bizarre to see just how cleanly cut the walls are.

真奇怪，牆壁被切割得如此乾淨利落

It really does look like a lost city.

它看起來真的像一座失落的城市。

-It does look like a lost city, this was a quarry that they just took- well just a stone quarry.

-它看起來確實像一座失落的城市，這是一個採石場，他們只是把... 好吧，只是一個採石場。

-Yeah, just took rocks basically.

-是的，基本上就是拿了石頭。

-They took rocks! That's what they did!

-他們拿了石頭！這就是他們所做的！

Credit where it's due to you Joey, it does look like a potential location for a horror film.

歸功於你，喬伊，它看起來確實像一個潛在的恐怖電影的位置。

-Absolutely.

-當然

-So you've struck gold here. It may just be better than the strawberry farm yet.

-所以你在這裡淘到了金子。可能比草莓農場還要好。

I've talked in the past about haikyo, abandoned buildings in Japan.

過去我曾說過日本的俳優，廢棄的建築。

Very common. Very easy to find in the countryside.

非常常見。在農村非常容易找到。

But, I've never really come across a place like this.

但是，我從來沒有真正遇到過這樣的地方。

Joey over there. Having fun in the corner.

喬伊在那邊在角落裡找樂子

You alright?

你還好嗎？

-(echo) Yeah.

-是啊

-What are you doing Joey?

-你在做什麼，喬伊？

-(echo) Chillin'.

-Chillin'.

-Don't need to make a horror film,

-不需要拍恐怖片。

It's creepy enough just Joey standing in the corner over there.

只有喬伊站在角落裡就夠嚇人的了。

[Chris] We're now in the inner sanctum of the stone quarry.

[克里斯]我們現在在採石場的內部聖殿。

And what have you discovered?

你發現了什麼？

-Look at these platforms here!

-看看這些平臺吧!

It straight up looks like a Zelda dungeon.

直接就像塞爾達地下城一樣。

I can see the level design, just *boop boop boop*

我可以看到關卡設計，只是*boop boop boop*。

And then there's a bunch of vases over there

然後有一堆花瓶在那邊。

And you can hear the *poor imitation of Zelda open chest music*

而且你可以聽到*差的模仿塞爾達開胸音樂*。

-It's insane, like there's

-這是瘋了，就像有...

-What, what is that there?

-什麼，那是什麼？

-What is it there? There's like three crates

-那是什麼？好像有三個箱子

And then there's a branch with a rope on

然後有一根樹枝，上面有繩子。

For jumping, and like, hooking onto.

用於跳躍，和喜歡，鉤到。

If there's anyone at Hollywood that wants to bring the new Indiana Jones film to Japan

如果好萊塢有誰想把《奪寶奇兵》的新片帶到日本來的話

Look no further.

別再看了。

-Indiana Jones and the Abandoned Stone Quarry.

印第安納-瓊斯和廢棄的採石場。

-(chuckles) That's what the people want.

-這就是人們想要的。

To be fair, it couldn't be much worse than Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

平心而論，它不會比《水晶骷髏王國》差多少。

-Yeah I was about to say! (chuckles)

-是的，我正想說！（笑聲）

-I'd kind of wiped that from my memory, for all the right reasons.

-我已經把它從我的記憶中抹去了，因為所有正確的原因。

Honestly, what were they thinking?

老實說，他們在想什麼？

Well we're in the abandoned quarry, there's only one thing left to do now.

好了，我們在廢棄的採石場，現在只剩下一件事要做了。

-What's that?

-那是什麼？

-London Fish and Chip flavoured Pringles!

-倫敦魚和薯片口味的薯片！

The flavour of London in the palm of my hand!

倫敦的味道就在我的手掌心!

-The fuck is this?!

-這他媽的是什麼？

-Pringles have brought out some new flavours

-Pringles推出了一些新口味的產品

This isn't a Pringles sponsorship

這不是Pringles的贊助。

I'm not sure I'd accept a sponsorship for something

我不知道我會不會接受贊助的東西。

as ridiculous as London flavoured Pringles.

就像倫敦口味的普林格一樣荒謬。

-Oh dude I'd take a Pringles sponsorship in a heartbeat, are you kidding?

-哦，老兄，我馬上就會接受普林格萊斯的贊助，你在開玩笑嗎？

-Absolute sellout. Here you are, give that a sniff. What do you reckon?

-絕對的賣身契。給你，聞一下你覺得怎麼樣？

It smells a bit like

聞起來有點像

someone's taken some cardboard and sprayed it with vinegar.

有人拿了一些紙板，噴上醋。

-Yeah.

-是的

[Crunchy noise of Pringles being consumed]

[脆脆的噪音 Pringles被消耗]

I actually like Pringles but

其實我喜歡普林格，但

but I don't like this one!

但我不喜歡這個！

-It tastes like sour onion flavour, but they went off like three months ago.

-嚐起來像酸洋蔥味，但他們三個月前就走了。

-Like really sour onion

-像真正的酸洋蔥

-One to ten?

-一到十？

-I'll give it like a two for effort

-我給它的努力打兩分吧

-Two out of ten, one for effort, two for flavour,

-10分中的2分，1分是努力，2分是味道。

Don't buy them.

不要買他們。

-Sponsor me Pringles.

-贊助我的普林格斯。

-London flavour, what were they thinking?

-倫敦風味，他們在想什麼？

That's what Journey Across Japan's about;

這就是《橫渡日本》的意義所在。

Eating Pringles in an abandoned quarry!

在一個廢棄的採石場吃普林格斯!

-You can't find this content anywhere else.

-你在其他地方找不到這個內容。

-There's a reason why!

-這是有原因的！

After having spent the afternoon lost in a deserted quarry

在一個廢棄的採石場迷失了一下午之後

Munching on fish and chip Pringles

吃著魚和薯片Pringles的時候

We suddenly realize we're late to pick up Natsuki, and make a desperate dash for Takasaki City.

我們突然意識到來不及接夏樹了，於是拼命往高崎市衝。

So we're in Takasaki, one of Gunma Prefecture's biggest cities,

所以我們在群馬縣最大的城市之一的高崎。

And we're about to meet Natsuki.

而我們馬上就要見到夏樹了。

And he's not gonna be in a good mood.

而且他的心情也不會好到哪裡去。

'Cause we're a little bit late.

因為我們有點晚了。

-Only two hours late!

-只晚了兩個小時！

-Two and a half hours

-兩個半小時

-Yeah, yeah

-是的，是的

-But we've got some Pringles.

-但我們有一些普林格餅乾。

And if anything can save the day, and cheer up Natsuki

如果有什麼東西能拯救世界，讓夏樹高興起來的話。

-It'll be Pringles

-會是普林格的

-What I will say, is I dunno where he is.

-我想說的是，我不知道他在哪裡。

Can you see an angry-looking Japanese guy?

你能看到一個看起來很生氣的日本人嗎？

Is that, look, there's a guy there

是，你看，有一個人在那裡。

Is that, nah, it's a woman.

是，吶，是個女人。

Oh dear.

哦，親愛的。

I do feel a bit bad, but that quarry, that was something else.

我確實覺得有點不妥，但那個採石場，那是另一回事。

-Yeah, we needed to create our masterpiece.

-是的，我們需要創造我們的傑作。

-Quarry versus Natsuki?

-夸父對夏樹？

The quarry's gonna win.

採石場會贏。

No, come on, where is he?

不，拜託，他在哪裡？

Fucking hell.

該死的。

Go and, uh, go and find him, and I'll sit here, I won't drive off.

去，呃，去找他，我就坐在這裡，我不會開車離開。

-Alright

-好吧

-We're not bluffing.

-我們不是在虛張聲勢

Like look; Joey's gone.

就像看；喬伊走了。

(Knocking noise)

（敲擊聲）

-Oh!

-哦！

Oh but Natsuki, in the back

哦，但是夏樹，在後面

In the back

在後面

Well done!

幹得好！

[Joey] I couldn't...

[喬伊]我不能... ...

-You've found him,

-你找到他了

-I guess so!

-我想也是！

-Good to see you Natsuki, how are you?

-很高興見到你，夏樹，你好嗎？

[Natsuki] Fucking hell.

[夏樹]他媽的地獄。

-Fucking hell!

-該死的！

-Damnit

-該死的

-Are you in a good mood? Happy?

-你心情好嗎？開心嗎？

-How many hours?

-多少個小時？

[Chris] How many hours?

[克里斯]多少小時？

[Joey] Two hours!

兩小時！

-Twenty minutes...

-20分鐘...

- Do you have to wait?

- 你要等嗎？

Stupid.

愚蠢的。

UK time.

英國時間。

-(chuckles) UK time?!

-英國時間？

-I run on UK time.

-我以英國時間運行。

-Always UK time

-始終是英國時間

-But I've got a present for you.

-但我有個禮物給你.

Good present.

好的禮物。

Pringles, London flavour.

Pringles，倫敦口味的。

[Natsuki] (in Japanese) Seriously?

[夏樹]（日語） 真的嗎？

-Fish and chip flavour

-魚和薯片口味

[Natsuki] (in Japanese) Incredible!

[夏樹](日語)不可思議！

-London fish and chips!

-倫敦魚和薯條！

-Very rare!

-非常罕見！

-Very rare.

-非常罕見。

Try it, try it.

試試吧，試試吧。