You caught me in the middle of telling myself a secret.

我正在跟自己說悄悄話。

Hi, Harry. I am gonna ask you 73 questions. Ready to do this?

嗨，哈利，我要問你73個問題，準備好了嗎？

Come, come.

來吧。

-Do you live alone? -I do.

- 你自己一個人住嗎？- 是的。

And how has your day been so far?

-你今天過得怎麼樣？

Well, I stepped in a rain puddle and accidentally got a ladybug wet, cried about it for hours after, but...

嗯，我踩到了一個水坑然後不小心弄溼了一隻瓢蟲，然後因此哭了幾個小時，但……

I think I made things right, cause that ladybug is going on tour with me as my opening act.

我想我做了對的事，因為那隻瓢蟲要跟著我一起開巡迴演唱會然後加入我的開場表演。

Last person you texted?

誰是你上一個發訊息的人？

My Uber driver from three weeks ago, just to say hello.

我三週前的Uber司機，打個招呼。

On a scale of 1 to 10, how excited are you about life?

如果用1到10來衡量，你對生活有多少激情？

A number that I made up that's impossible to communicate vocally, only with a look, specifically this look.

一個我自創的不可能光說就能知道的數字，只能看出來，特別是夠過這個表情。

Least favorite color?

最不喜歡的顏色？

Ultramarine blue.

海藍。

Favorite color?

最喜歡的顏色？

Magenta.

洋紅。

What's the best gift you ever received?

你收到過最好的禮物是什麼？

A smile.

一個微笑。

And you know who gave it to me? You.

你知道是誰給我的嗎？你。

Wow. Thank you.

-哇哦。 謝謝。

What's your favorite meal?

你最喜歡吃什麼？

A bowl of cream topped with drizzled raw honey straight from the bee colony I'm friends with, and a handful of wizzle berries.

一碗奶油淋上我認識的蜂群製造的生蜂蜜，和一把威茲爾漿果。

I'm sorry, wizzle berries?

不好意思，什麼是威茲爾漿果？

Yes, from the wizzle berry bush that grows in an enchanted land that's only accessible from the old armoire I keep in my garden.

嗯嗯，威茲爾漿果就是來自於只能從我花園裡的舊衣櫥進入的魔法之地裡種植的威茲爾漿果叢。

What are you scared of?

你怕什麼？

Letting my anxieties tear me away from the present moment.

我的焦慮把我從現實中剝離。

Wait, no. Spiders.

等等，不對。是蜘蛛。

What's your guilty pleasure?

你有罪的享受是什麼？

-Chocolate. -Oh, nice. Simple.

- 巧克力。- 哦，不錯。很簡單。

From the set of the original "Willy Wonka" film.

來自「巧克力冒險工廠」原版電影的巧克力。

Favorite movie?

最愛的電影？

"Life," directed by me.

「生活」，導演是我。

Shot with my eyeballs.

由我的眼珠拍攝。

Coming soon to theaters near and far.

即將在各地的影院上映。

Best advice you ever got?

你得到過最好的建議是？

You can save 2 dollars a month on Netflix if you get the non-HD version.

如果你在Netflix訂閱非高畫質版，每個月可以省下2美元。

Where'd you get that guitar?

你的吉他是從哪來的？

Guitar Center.

吉他中心。

Where'd you get that piano?

你的鋼琴是從哪來的？

Guitar Center.

鋼琴中心。

And what's in your cup?

你杯子裡是什麼？

Vodka!

伏特加！

Really?

真的嗎？

No, it's tea.

不，是茶啦。

How do you take your tea?

你是怎麼喝茶的？

With vodka!

加伏特加！

Dream collaborator?

夢想的合作者？

Sorry, mate. I need to get going.

抱歉，朋友。我得走了。

But we still have so many questions left.

但我們還有很多問題沒問到。

I know, but I forgot I already made plans to blow a kiss to my best friend, a beluga whale wearing a bellhop outfit.

我知道，但我忘了我已經有其他安排了，我要給我穿著門僮裝的白鯨朋友一個飛吻。

Thanks for stopping by.

謝謝你的拜訪。

And remember, treat people with kindness.

記住，要善待別人。

Cheers.

掰囉。

Chocolate kisses.

巧克力之吻。

I just made that up.

我剛剛才創作的。