Starring, you guessed it, Squidward!

主演，你猜對了，是章魚哥!

This show was filmed in front of a live studio audience

這個節目是在演播室現場觀眾面前拍攝的。

[giggling]

[傻笑]

Heaven, at last.

天堂，終於到了。

I've seen more alert people in a retirement home.

我在養老院裡見過更警覺的人。

Oh, which way to the living-without-a-brain seminar?

哦，去無腦生活研討會怎麼走？

Don't be late.

不要遲到。

I've heard better comebacks from a turkey sandwich.

我聽過更好的火雞三明治的回擊。

Get a life!

去生活吧！

This place is better than I expected!

這個地方比我想象的要好!

302...

302...

303...

303...

And 304!

還有304！

Beautiful!

漂亮！

And not a pineapple in sight!

也沒有看到一個菠蘿！

Good night, Clary.

晚安，克拉裡

Tomorrow, we began life anew.

明天，我們又開始了新的生活。

[phone rings]

[電話鈴聲]

304, New Life Street, Squidward speaking.

新生活街304號，魷魚娃說。

[SpongeBob mumbling on the phone]

[海綿寶寶在電話裡喃喃自語]

There is no way I am moving back there, SpongeBob!

我不可能搬回那裡去，海綿寶寶！

I am finally among my own kind.

我終於和自己的同類人在一起了。

[SpongeBob mumbling on the phone]

[海綿寶寶在電話裡喃喃自語]

Now, goodbye.

現在，再見了。

[mumbling]

[喃喃自語]

[mumbling]

[喃喃自語]

[rooster crowing]

[公雞叫聲]

I'm my own man.

我是我自己的人。

Now these neighbors know how to live!

現在這些鄰居都知道怎麼生活了!

Intensive!

強化！

Hm, I bet they won't have...

嗯，我打賭他們不會有... ...

Wow, they have it!

哇，他們有了！

Canned bread!

罐頭面包！

This town is great!

這座城市真不錯!

I would really be impressed if it had...

如果有的話，我真的會很感動... ...

an interpretive dance academy!

詮釋性舞蹈學院！

Yeah! It's even better in a group!

是啊！一群人一起玩更爽！

This town is perfect.

這個小鎮很完美。

A clarinet trio?!

單簧管三重奏？

[rooster crowing]

[公雞叫聲]

Another great day!

又是美好的一天!

Yep, this is great!

是的，這是偉大的！

Might as well rename this town Squidward's Paradise!

還不如把這個鎮子改名為章魚哥的天堂！

Or perhaps... too much paradise.

或者是... ... 太多的天堂。

SpongeBob?

海綿寶寶？

Tch.

Tch.

[whistling]

[口哨聲]

Oops!

糟了

[giggling]

[傻笑]

[clears throat]

[清嗓子]

Please.

求你了

Just getting the leaves.

剛拿到葉子。

[giggling]

[傻笑]

[giggling]

[傻笑]

[laughing]

[笑]

[giggling]

[傻笑]

[laughing]

[笑]

Could you pipe down over there, iron lung?

鐵肺，你能不能去那邊管管？

[both laughing]

[都笑了]

[laughing]

[笑]

Tag! You're it!

標籤！就是你了！

[laughing]

[笑]

What can I get you boys?

你們要什麼？

[laughing]

[笑]

Here it is, Patrick.

在這裡，帕特里克。

Now we've just gotta convince Squidward to come back home.

現在我們只要說服章魚哥回家就好了。

You got our apology cake?

你有我們的道歉蛋糕嗎？

[laughing]

[笑]

Hey! That looked like Squidward!

嘿，那看起來像章魚哥！

That looked like Squidward, also!

那看起來也像章魚哥！

In angry mob form!

憤怒的暴徒形式！

Hold it right there, Mr. Tentacles!

別動，觸手先生！

Stay back! I've got gardening tools!

別過來！我有園藝工具！

Here, just read this.

來，就讀這個。

What is it?

什麼事？

A well thought out and organized list of complaints.

一張條理清晰的投訴清單。

Grievances?! This town is a grievance!

怨氣？這個小鎮就是個冤大頭!

There should be a law against so many stuck-up tightwads living in one place!

應該制定一項法律，禁止這麼多自大狂住在一個地方!

This city needs to be destroyed!

這個城市需要被摧毀！

Or at least painted a different color.

或者至少塗上不同的顏色。

FYI, you don't have to live here, you know.

順便說一下，你不一定要住在這裡，你知道的。

Hey, you're right!

嘿，你是對的！

And I'm leaving ASAP!

而我要儘快離開！

- Are you Squidward? - No.

- 你是章魚哥嗎？- 不是

- Are you Squidward? - No.

- 你是章魚哥嗎？- 不是

Are you Squidward?

你是章魚哥嗎？

That's okay, take your time.

沒關係，慢慢來。

Any one of these Squidwards could be the real Squidward, Patrick!

這些章魚哥中的任何一個都可能是真正的章魚哥，帕特里克！

Freedom! Whoo-hoo!

自由！嗚呼！

[laughing]

[笑]

Well, we know one thing, it sure isn't that guy!

好吧，我們知道一件事，它肯定不是那個人!