字幕列表 影片播放 由 AI 自動生成 列印所有字幕 列印翻譯字幕 列印英文字幕 >> THE MOST CONTENTIOUS ELECTION IN U.S. HISTORIES. >> 美國曆史上最激烈的選舉。 >> STILL HOURS UNTIL THE POLLS CLOSE. >> 距離投票結束還有幾個小時。 >> THE UGLIEST CAMPAIGN WE'VE EVER SEEN. >> 我們見過的最醜陋的廣告。 >> THE NATION STILL REELING FROM THE DEADLIEST PANDEMIC EVER >> 全國仍在從有史以來最嚴重的恐慌中掙扎 SEEN. 見過的。 >> THE QUESTION ALL OF AMERICA IS ASKING: ARE WE ( BLEEP ). >>全美國都在問的問題:我們是不是(嗶)。 >> WITH MILLIONS OF MAIL-IN BALLOTS STILL TO BE COUNTED, CNN >> 隨著數百萬張郵寄選票仍在計算中,CNN IS NOW READY TO PROJECT... TOO EARLY TO CALL. 現在已經準備好項目...太早打電話。 >> TOO EARLY TO CALL, HUH? >> 現在打電話太早了吧? WAIT TILL THEY GET A L LOAD OF M ( LAUGHING ) 等到他們得到一大堆的M >> THIS ELECTION, SO HISTORIC, SO CRUCIAL. >> 這次選舉,如此歷史性,如此關鍵性。 WHO WILL THE PEOPLE CHOOSE? 人民會選擇誰? PERHAPS A PRESIDENT WHO DOES NOT WISH TO MURDER ME. 也許是一個不希望謀殺我的總統。 ONLY TIME WILL TELL. 只有時間會告訴你。 >> SORRY TO INTERRUPT, WORLD, IT'S YOUR ONCE AND FUTURE >> 抱歉打擾了,世界,這是你的曾經和未來。 PRESIDENT HERE, WITH AN IMPORTANT ELECTION UPDATE. 主席,這裡有一個重要的選舉最新消息。 I SMELL A LANDSLIDE! 地滑的氣味! ( CHEERING ). (歡呼): >> EXCUSE ME, SENATOR, MASKS ARE REQUIRED BEYOND THIS POINT. >> 對不起,參議員,過了這個點就需要戴面具了。 >> OH, SILLY ME. >> 哦,SILLY ME。 OFF TO THE ( BLEEP ) PIT. 關閉到(嗶)坑。 I HAVE DEFEATED THE CHINA VIRUS! 我已經打敗了中國的病毒! AND NOW, HERE TONIGHT, I WILL DEFEAT THE CHINA BIDEN. 而現在,今晚在這裡,我會打敗中國的BIDEN。 BILL BARR, LET'S CLOSE THE POLLS! 比爾-巴爾,讓我們結束投票吧! >> YES, MR. PRESIDENT. >> 是的,先生。主席: >> WHAT THE ( BLEEP )? >> 什麼是(BLEEP)? WHY ARE YOU NAKED? 你為什麼要裸體? >> WE'RE ON SHOWTIME. >> 我們是在SHOWTIME。 I CAN SHOW FULL FRONTAL, MR. PRESIDENT. 我可以給你看完整的正面,先生。主席: >> ALL RIGHT. >> 好的。 NOW, LET'S LOOK THEM UP. 現在,讓我們來看看他們。 >> TIME TO PUT THE "DICK" IN "DICTATOR." >> 是時候把 "DICK "放在 "DICTATOR "裡了。 ♪ ♪ ♪ SEE, AMERICA, A LANDSLIDE! 你看,美國,一個滑坡! TONIGHT, WE CELEBRATE ON THE STREETS OF D.C. THIS DEMOCRACY. 今晚,我們在華盛頓街頭慶祝這場民主。 >> Stephen: BREAKING NEWS, I AM NOW LOCKED IN A POLLING PLACE >> 史蒂芬: 最新消息,我現在被鎖在一個投票站裡了 WITH HUNDREDS OF VOTERS, AND ONLY ONE BATHROOM. 有幾百個投票者,只有一個衛生間。 IT SEEMS CHILI WAS A BAD LUNCH CHOICE. 似乎辣椒是一個錯誤的午餐選擇。 THE QUESTION ON EVERYONE'S MIND: WHERE IS JOE BIDEN? 每個人心中的疑問:喬-比登在哪裡? >> I'M AWAKE! >> 我醒了! AM I PRESIDENT YET? 我已經是總統了嗎? >> NO, IT'S THE JOE SIGNAL. >> 不,這是喬伊的信號。 WE KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. 我們知道這意味著什麼。 >> THERE'S A TRAIN COMING? >> 有火車來了? I HAVE TO GET MY BAGS! 我得去拿我的包包! >> NO, DEMOCRACY IS IN JEOPARDY! >> 不,民主是在jeopardy! >> OH, RIGHT, THE THING. >> 哦,對了,那個東西。 TO THE BIDEN BASEMENT. 到比登地下室。 ♪ ♪ ♪ ( "Y.M.C.A." ) (Y.M.C.A.) >> WHAT A LANDSLIDE, HUH, FOLKS? >> 什麼是滑坡,呵呵,夥計們? HERE'S YOUR STUPID STIMULUS, SUCKERS! 這就是你那愚蠢的刺激,笨蛋! ♪ YOUNG MAN, GET YOURSELF OFF THE GROUND ♪ # 年輕人,讓你自己離開地面 READ IN THE CORONAVIRUS. 在冠狀病毒中閱讀。 DON'T LET IT DOMINATE YOU. 不要讓它支配你。 DON'T BE AFRAID! 不要害怕! YOU'RE GOING TO FEEL 20 YEARS YOUNGER! 你會覺得自己年輕了20歲! ♪ I SAID YOUNG MAN, WHEN YOU'RE SHORT ON... ♪ # 我說年輕人,當你缺少... ... # 我說年輕人 >> MEGA-MAY GO-MEGA. >> MEGA-MAY GO-MEGA。 MONEY-MONEY-MONEY. 錢,錢,錢,錢。 WHO DO YOU TRUST? 你信任誰? ME? 我? I'M GIVING AWAY FREE VACCINES. 我正在送出免費的疫苗。 ( LAUGHING ) ERIC HELP ME OUT! (笑)埃裡克幫助我出去! AND WHERE IS JOE BIDEN? 喬-比登在哪裡? HE'S AT HOME WASHING HIS MASK! 他在家裡洗他的面具! >> I GOT ICE CREAM ON IT, GEEZ! >> 我得到了冰淇淋上,哎呀! FOCUS, JOE, TIME TO SUIT UP! 集中精力,喬,該準備了! TO THE BIDEN MOBILE! 到比登移動! COME ON! 來吧! WE'VE GOT TO STOP HIM. 我們必須阻止他。 >> HERE TEAR GAS ASS IS GRASS. >> 在這裡,TEAR GAS屁股是草。 >> WHY IS HE NAKED? >> 他為什麼要裸體? >> IT'S SHOWTIME, JOE! >> 表演時間到了,喬! >> ALL RIGHT,. >> 所有權利,。 >> REDACT THIS, BITCH! >> 刪掉這個,婊子! >> THIS IS TURNING ME ON! >> 這是讓我興奮! >> WE'VE BEEN FREED, AND JUST IN TIME TO USE THE LITTLE ANCHOR'S >> 我們被釋放了,正好可以使用小錨的功能。 ROOM. 房間: >> SKIPETY-DO FOLKS. >> SKIPETY-DO FOLKS。 >> E.T., GO VOTE! >> E. T. ,去投票! >> DUMP TRUMP. >> 杜普-特朗普。 >> I KNEW HE WAS JUICEIN'. >> 我知道他是JUICEIN'。 >> COME ON, YOU SLEEPY BASTARD! >> 來吧,你這個嗜睡的混蛋! TIME TO STOP THE MALARKEY, YOU LYING DOG-FACED PONY CLOWN! 是時候停止馬勒基了,你這隻撒謊的狗臉小丑! LET'S SETTLE THIS LIKE MEN. 讓我們像男人一樣解決這個問題。 HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE FOR YOU TO GO AWAY, 130,000. 你要多久才能離開,13萬。 >> YOU CAN MAKE THE CHECK OUT TO PERRY CUOMO. >> 你可以把支票寄給Perry CUOMO。 >> I GUESS WE'RE DOING THIS. >> 我想我們應該這樣做。 >> REPORTER, JUST YOU AND ME NOW. >> 記者,現在只有你和我。 MONO E-- ERIC! 猴子E -- 埃裡克! >> I LOVE YOU, DAD! >> 愛你,爸爸! >> YOU LOSE, JOE. >> 你輸了,喬。 >> WHATEVER HAPPENED-- UGH! >> 發生了什麼事 -- Ugh! TO DEMOCRACY? 到民主制度? >> MAYBE I'M IMMUNE. >> 也許我是免疫的。 I DON'T KNOW. 我不知道。 >> NOT SO FAST. >> 不那麼快。 PERSON. 個人: >> WOMAN. >> 女: >> MAN. >> 男人: >> CAMERA. >> 攝影機: TV. 電視。 AND WE'RE LIVE. 而我們是活的。 >> DEMOCRACY DON'T DIE THAT EASY, JACK. >> 民主不會那麼容易死,傑克。 THE AMERICAN PEOPLE STILL GOT A SAY WHO WINS AND WHO LOSES. 美國人民仍然有發言權誰贏誰輸。 >> STAY BACK! >> 留下來吧! I GOTTA STAY PRESIDENT! 我一定要留住總統! I'M 400 MILLION IN DEBT TO SOME REALLY BAD UKRAINIANS! 我欠了一些非常壞的英國人4億美金的債務! NOW PUT THE DEMOCRACY DOWN, AND NOBODY GETS HURT. 現在把民主制度放下,沒有人會受到傷害。 OH, MAN, WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP! 哦,夥計,你能不能閉嘴! BA-BA-BING. BA -BA -BING。 >> IT'S RIGGED! >> IT'S RIGGED! THEY'RE ALL RIGGED! 他們都是對的! A-HA-HA-HA! 啊哈哈哈哈! I HATE EVERYBODY! 我恨每個人! WHAT ABOUT HILLARY'S EMAILS? 那希拉里的郵件呢? >> YOU KNOW, YOU ALWAYS SAID IT WAS GOING TO DISAPPEAR. >> 你知道,你一直說它會消失。 >> LIKE A MIRACLE. >> 就像一個奇蹟。 ( SPLASH ) >> NEW PRESIDENT! ( SPLASH ) >> 新主席! >> OH, CRAP, THIS AIN'T OVER! >> 哦,糟糕,這還沒結束! EVERYONE KEEP COUNTING THE VOTES! 大家繼續計算選票!
B1 中級 中文 民主 年輕人 滑坡 裸體 埃裡克 面具 選舉騎士崛起--斯蒂芬-科爾伯特的選舉之夜特別報道 (Election Knight Rises - Stephen Colbert's Election Night Special) 21 3 林宜悉 發佈於 2020 年 11 月 07 日 更多分享 分享 收藏 回報 影片單字