Harper.

哈珀

And it was revelatory.

而且是啟示性的。

Hallelujah, baby, Let's dive right in.

哈利路亞，寶貝，讓我們跳進去吧。

There are seven types of boundaries.

邊界有七種類型。

One physical.

一個物理。

Don't touch May to property.

不要碰梅到財產。

Don't touch my stuff.

不要碰我的東西。

Three.

三號

Sexual, Don't Touch Me or My stuff and sexual can also include the language and ideas around sexuality.

性，不要碰我或我的東西和性也可以包括圍繞性的語言和觀念。

For instance, how someone decides to talk to you about sex for emotional relational boundaries, which we respect by how we care for others and by making space for them to have their own emotional experiences.

比如，別人如何決定和你談性的情感關係界限，我們通過對別人的關心，為他們留出空間，讓他們有自己的情感體驗，從而尊重他們。

Five.

五是

Intellectual boundaries your thoughts, beliefs, ideas and how they are respected.

智力邊界你的思想、信仰、理念以及如何尊重他們。

Six.

六、

Spiritually your belief systems and finally, seven time boundaries demands made on you, or that you make on others involving time.

精神上你的信仰系統，最後，七個時間界限要求對你，或你對別人涉及時間。

Every boundary also has three versions rigid, where nothing gets through that boundary ever permeable, where everything you get through that boundary all the time and finally flexible, which, of course, is the ideal boundary because it comes from us listening to our internal voice, the one that wants to both protect us and have us experience growth.

每一個邊界也有三個版本剛性的，沒有任何東西可以通過這個邊界永遠滲透，你所有的東西都可以通過這個邊界，最後是柔性的，當然，這是理想的邊界，因為它來自於我們傾聽我們內心的聲音，這個聲音既想保護我們，又想讓我們經歷成長。

The book asks you to really examine how boundaries were first demonstrated and modeled for you.

這本書要求你真正審視邊界是如何首先為你展示和示範的。

So where did your boundaries actually come from?

那麼，你的界限到底從何而來？

As a kid, I often got the message that I should have permeable physical boundaries.

小時候，我經常得到這樣的資訊：我應該有通透的物理邊界。

Give your aunt a hug on.

給阿姨抱上。

I could definitely see me reenacting these dynamics with my own kids.

我肯定能看到我和自己的孩子重演這些動態。

Kiss me on your lips, kiss me, kiss me on your lips.

吻我在你的嘴脣，吻我，吻我在你的嘴脣。

After figuring out the origin of your boundaries, Harper asked us to really examine how we respect those belonging to other people.

在弄清了你的界限的由來之後，哈珀讓我們真正審視一下自己是如何尊重那些屬於別人的界限的。

So this requires you to really think about sometimes that you have possibly violated somebody else's boundaries.

所以這就要求你有時候真的要想一想，你有可能侵犯了別人的界限。

Like, you know, when I violate my brother's intellectual ones.

就像，你知道，當我侵犯了我哥哥的智力的。

Everything you think is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

你所想的一切都是我聽過的最愚蠢的事情。

I didn't even finish talking.

我還沒說完呢

You didn't need Thio and I have definitely not respected some emotional relational boundaries back in my youth.

你不需要Thio，我年輕的時候絕對沒有尊重過一些情感關係的界限。

Dude, you're overreacting.

夥計，你反應過度了。

Okay?

好嗎？

Whatever happened doesn't justify this reaction.

不管發生了什麼，都不能成為這種反應的理由。

But the book is an excellent way to really look at our relationships to boundaries and get a more comprehensive understanding of where they came from, if they're working and how to build better ones.

但這本書是一個很好的方法，可以讓我們真正審視我們與邊界的關係，更全面地瞭解它們的來源，是否有效，以及如何建立更好的邊界。

Harper's final Nugget of knowledge is to ask us to get clear on our values and then create boundaries around them.

哈珀最後的知識金塊是要求我們明確自己的價值觀，然後圍繞價值觀建立界限。

So if your value is honesty, make a boundary fade.

所以，如果你的價值是誠實，就請你做一個邊界的淡化。

Do this, just make me look fat.

這樣做，只是讓我看起來很胖。

Yes, thank you so much for respecting my white lie boundary, babe.

是的，非常感謝你尊重我的白色謊言界限，寶貝。

No problem, babe.

沒問題，寶貝。

Learning how to honor the boundaries of others and ourselves will lead to healthier relationships, better interpersonal communication and more fulfillment.

學習如何尊重他人和我們自己的界限，將導致更健康的關係，更好的人際溝通和更多的成就感。

I'm Anaconda and thank you so much.

我是Anaconda，非常感謝你。

The audible for sponsoring today's video audible helps you get more stories and information through the gift of found time, allowing you to listen while commuting, cooking or exercising.

贊助今天的視頻audible通過贈送找到的時間，幫助你獲得更多的故事和資訊，讓你在通勤、做飯或運動時聽。

A recent Pew study actually found that 27% of adults have not heard a single book in the past year that is up 19% since 2011.

皮尤最近的一項研究實際上發現，27%的成年人在過去一年中沒有聽過一本書，這比2011年增長了19%。

Lack of time was cited as the main reason why so, with audible, you'll have no excuse.

缺乏時間被認為是主要原因，所以，有了audible，你就沒有藉口了。

I've teamed up with Audible, and they're offering a 30 day audible trial.

我和Audible合作，他們提供30天的試聽期。

You can choose one audiobook and two exclusive audible originals that you can't hear anywhere else, absolutely free.

你可以選擇一本有聲書和兩本獨家有聲原版書，你在其他地方聽不到，絕對免費。

You can visit audible dot com slash anna or text Anna to 505 100.

你可以訪問audible dot com slash anna或者給Anna發短信到505 100。

I just finished this book, Your boundaries, which really helped me realize which boundaries of mine are very rigid or permeable and just allow me to create more flexibility in my life, which has already led to more authentic and like, sort of feeling loved in relationships and feeling loved with myself, with friends and with family.

我剛剛讀完《你的界限》這本書，這本書真的幫助我認識到我的哪些界限是很僵硬的，或者說是很通透的，只是讓我在生活中創造更多的靈活性，這已經讓我在人際關係中感受到更多的真實和喜歡，也算是對自己、對朋友、對家人的愛。

And also like a little certain someone that I'm like romantically involved with.

還喜歡上了一個小某，我喜歡浪漫的人。

Whatever you don't get to know, you can start listening with a 30 day audible trial and choose one audio book and to audible originals absolutely free at audible dot com slash anna or by texting a N N a to 505 100.

無論你沒有得到了解，你可以開始聽30天的有聲試用，並選擇一個有聲書和對有聲原件絕對免費在audible點com斜槓anna或通過簡訊一個N N一個到505 100。