I compare it to our Olympics.

我把它比作我們的奧運會。

I really feel like there's nothing else to compare it to.

我真的覺得沒有什麼可以比擬的了。

You have to go, as soon as I asked to do the roast

我一叫你去做烤肉，你就得去了。

I start writing jokes, and then you have to

我開始寫笑話，然後你就得寫。

start taking those jokes out

開玩笑

and then I have to go from club to club

然後，我必須從一個俱樂部到另一個俱樂部

and just tell the people watching,

而只是告訴看熱鬧的人。

I'm like, imagine Rob Lowe is here,

我想，想象羅伯-洛威在這裡。

just for the sake of things.

只是為了事情的緣故。

I'm about to say a lot of mean things about him.

我就要說他很多壞話了。

Picture him here laughing,

想象一下他在這裡笑的樣子。

and then you get laughs, but it's like

然後你得到的笑聲，但它就像。

you can't ever really know how it's gonna do in the room.

你永遠不能真正知道它是如何在房間裡做。

There's no way to tell.

沒辦法判斷。

And so, it's so much preparation

所以，它是如此多的準備

and then you finally do it

然後你終於做了

and luckily it's always a great crowd

幸運的是，它總是一個偉大的人群。

and they're ready for it and it's gone well,

他們已經準備好了，而且進展順利。

but the first time doing it, I was terrified

但第一次做的時候，我很害怕。

and I always for the past three roasts,

我總是在過去的三個烤。

the three that I've done,

我做過的三個。

I always get a point of utter exhaustion beforehand

我總是事先得到一個點 徹底的疲憊。

because I've trained so hard

因為我訓練得很辛苦

and that night it just feels so good doing it and being done

那天晚上，它只是感覺這麼好做，並完成了。

because you just never know.

因為你永遠不知道。

It's one of the only things in comedy

這是喜劇中唯一的一件事。

that you can't really prepare for

防不勝防

because it's such a unique performance.

因為它是如此獨特的表現。

I'm kind of not surprised,

我有點兒不驚訝。

but it's interesting to hear that you test,

但有趣的是，聽到你測試。

or have the ability to go test the jokes out,

或者有能力去測試一下笑話。

which makes perfect sense.

這是很有道理的。

Why wouldn't you?

為什麼不呢？

You're in front of the mic

你在麥克風前

and you're doing your thing anyway,

反正你也在做你的事情。

because for me, I'm not a professional at it,

因為對我來說，我不是一個專業的人。

I had never tested one of those jokes that I got.

我從來沒有測試過我得到的那些笑話。

So I'm literally, this is the first time I'm telling it,

所以我從字面上看，這是我第一次講。

the first time anybody's hearing.

第一次有人聽到。

I have no idea if people are gonna think

我不知道人們是否會認為

it's too mean, not mean enough, whatever,

太刻薄了，不夠刻薄，隨便。

and it's all live and it's in front of everybody.

它是所有的現場，它是在大家面前。

I know!

我知道！

I always worry about the stars during these roasts

我總是擔心這些烤肉時的星空。

because as a comedian, Jeff Ross, me,

因為作為一個喜劇演員，傑夫-羅斯，我。

and usually the other couple comics,

和通常的其他夫婦漫畫。

we're all at the clubs all night doing our roast sets,

我們都在俱樂部整晚做我們的烤肉集。

and then we think about the actors

然後我們再想想演員

that are on the dais,

在臺上的。

and I'm like, they're just gonna wing it.

我想，他們只是要去翼它。

But the thing is, they always kill!

但問題是，他們總是殺人！

You guys always do well.

你們總是做得很好。

You have one rehearsal,

你有一次排練。

but you're professionals

但你們是專業人士

so you always do well,

所以你總是做得很好。

but it is funny that I feel the need

但有趣的是，我覺得有必要

to go out and run the set like 60 times.

走出去，運行集像60倍。

That's crazy!

太瘋狂了！

Like honestly Rob, every single time I do a roast

就像老實說，羅布，每次我做一個單一的時間烤

I am so run down because I'm doing like five sets a night,

我太累了，因為我一晚上要做五套動作。

having all these sheets of paper,

有所有這些紙片。

scratching out jokes, rewriting them, reorganizing them.

刮出笑話，重新寫，重新組織。

I hired a writer's assistant last year.

我去年請了一個作家助理。

I hired writers.

我僱了作家。

I had a writers' room last year.

我去年有一個作家室。

I'm not even joking.

我甚至不是在開玩笑。

What?

什麼？

It was nuts.

這是個瘋子。

I lost money on it, no joke.

我輸了錢，不是開玩笑。

But it is the biggest opportunity

但這是最大的機會

for a comedian to make a splash and to really be seen.

對於一個喜劇演員來說，要想出彩，真正被人看到。

It's like we don't have The Tonight Show anymore

就像我們沒有 "今夜秀 "了一樣

with Johnny Carson.

與約翰尼-卡森。

We don't have the same.

我們沒有相同的。

It's just the best platform for a comedian to make it,

這只是一個喜劇演員最好的平臺。

so I work my tail off on it

所以我拼命工作

and every year I tell my friends,

每年我都會告訴我的朋友。

remind me never to do one of these again

提醒我不要再做這種事了

because I'm losing my mind and I hate this process,

因為我失去了我的頭腦，我討厭這個過程。

and then I do it and I'm like,

然後我做了，我很喜歡，

oh my god, that was the best night of my life.

哦，我的上帝，這是最好的 晚上我的生活。

I feel like they're pregnancies.

我覺得他們是懷孕了。

I'm always like, I don't want to do this again!

我總是說，我不想再這樣做了!

And then I'm holding my baby

然後我抱著我的寶貝

and I'm like, I love it, I want to have another.

我想，我喜歡它，我想有另一個。

Yeah.

是啊。

I mean, I don't have kids, but I compare it to that.

我的意思是，我沒有孩子，但我比較它。