WELCOME, ONE AND ALL.

歡迎，大家好。

TO "A LATE SHOW."

到 "晚間秀"。

I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.

我是你的主播，史蒂芬-科爾伯特。

WE'RE ARE EXACTLY TWO WEEKS AWAY FROM THE ELECTION.

我們離選舉只有兩個星期的時間了。

SO, IF YOU HAVEN'T DECIDED WHO YOU'RE VOTING FOR YET, GOOD LUCK

所以，如果你還沒有決定你要投給誰，祝你好運

ESCAPING THAT ABANDONED MINESHAFT.

逃離那個廢棄的礦洞。

OR STAY DOWN THERE 'TIL WE HAVE A VACCINE!

或者待在那裡，直到我們有一個疫苗！

IT'S HARD TO EXPLAIN.

這很難解釋。

WE REALLY NEED A VACCINE.

我們真的需要一種疫苗。

IT'S A LONG STORY.

這是一個很長的故事。

AS THE ELECTION DAY BARELIES DOWN ON US LIKE AN

當選舉日如雨後春筍般向我們襲來的時候。

OUT-OF-CONTROL MANURE SPREADING, ONE OF THE LAST CHANCES TO

失控的糞便擴散，最後的機會之一。

INFLUENCE THE RACE IS THURSDAY'S PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE.

影響比賽的是週四的總統辯論。

WE AT "THE LATE SHOW" WILL BE LIVE, WITH IN-DEPTH POLITICAL

我們在 "晚間秀 "將現場直播，深入淺出的政治。

ANALYSIS AND EXTENSIVE COVERAGE OF WHATEVER FLYING CREATURE

對任何飛行生物的分析和詳細報道。

HAPPENS TO STEAL THE SHOW.

發生搶戲。

MY MONEY IS ON A FRUIT BAT LANDING ON KRISTEN WELKER.

我的錢都花在了克莉絲汀-威克的身上

NOW, AT THE LAST DEBATE, TRUMP INTERRUPTED BIDEN AND CHRIS

現在，在最後的辯論中，特朗普打斷了比登和克里斯的辯論。

WALLACE-- AND THIS IS TRUE-- 128 TIMES.

瓦利斯，這是真的，128次。

SO, THE DEBATE COMMISSION HAS ANNOUNCED THERE WILL BE A MUTE

所以，辯論委員會宣佈將進行靜音處理

BUTTON AT THE NEXT PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE.

下一次總統辯論時的按鈕。

THAT'S GOOD!

這很好！

WHILE WE'RE AT IT, HOW ABOUT A FAST FORWARD BUTTON?

既然如此，那快進按鈕呢？

JUST ZIP STRAIGHT TO NOVEMBER 3.

只是直接拉到11月3日。

NOW, THIS MUTE BUTTON WON'T BE OPERATIONAL FOR THE ENTIRE

現在，這個靜音按鈕在整個過程中都不能用了。

DEBATE.

辯論：

EACH CANDIDATE WILL BE GIVEN TWO MINUTES TO ANSWER AN INITIAL

每位候選人將有兩分鐘的時間來回答一個初步的問題。

QUESTION.

問題：

DURING THAT PORTION, THE OPPOSING CANDIDATE'S MICROPHONE

在該部分中，對方候選人的手機。

WILL BE MUTED.

將被靜音。

ON OF COURSE, TRUMP COULD JUST

當然，特朗普可以只是。

INTERRUPT BIDEN BY WALKING OVER TO HIS PODIUM, WHICH IS WHY THE

通過走過去打斷比登的PODIUM，這也是為什麼他的。

DEBATE COMMISSION IS ALSO PUTTING HIM ON A CHILD LEASH.

辯論委員會也把他放在兒童皮帶上。

"DONALD, NOT YOUR TURN.

"唐納德，不是你的回合，

GO BACK TO YOUR PODIUM.

回到你的PODIUM。

DO NOT-- DO NOT EAT THAT, YOUNG MAN!"

不要... 不要吃那個，年輕人！"

THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN IS NOT HAPPY.

特朗普競選團隊不高興。

CAMPAIGN MANAGER BILL STEPIEN TOLD REPORTERS, "PRESIDENT TRUMP

競選經理BILL STEPIEN對記者說："特朗普總統。

IS COMMITTED TO DEBATING JOE BIDEN, REGARDLESS OF LAST-MINUTE

致力於辯論喬-比登，不管最後一分鐘的。

RULE CHANGES FROM THE BIASED COMMISSION IN THEIR LATEST

偏向性委員會在其最新報告中對規則進行的修改。

ATTEMPT TO PROVIDE ADVANTAGE TO THEIR FAVORED CANDIDATE."

試圖為自己喜歡的候選人提供優勢。"

ENFORCING THE RULES ISN'T GIVING SOMEONE AN ADVANTAGE.

執行規則並不是給別人帶來優勢。

THAT'S LIKE SAYING "THE OLYMPIC JUDGES ARE PLAYING FAVORITES

這就像說 "奧運評審在徇私舞弊"。

BECAUSE THEY WON'T LET ME THROW BRICKS AT MICHAEL PHELPS!"

因為他們不允許我向邁克爾-菲爾普斯扔磚頭！"

THEY MAY NOT BE HAPPY BUT, ULTIMATELY, THE MUTE BUTTON MAY

他們可能不高興，但是，最終，靜音按鈕可能。

PLAY INTO TRUMP'S NEW STRATEGY, BECAUSE, REPORTEDLY, HIS DEBATE

玩到特朗普的新策略，因為，據報道，他的辯論。

COACHES NOW WANT HIM TO STOP INTERRUPTING JOE BIDEN AND TO

教練們現在希望他不要再幹擾喬-比登，要

TRY TO BE MORE LIKABLE.

試著變得更可愛。

HOLD ON.

堅持住。

NOW THEY'RE TRYING TO MAKE TRUMP MORE LIKABLE?

現在他們想讓特朗普更受歡迎？

HE'S BEEN THE PRESIDENT FOR ALMOS FOUR YEARS!

他已經當了四年的總統了！

THAT'S LIKE A FIREFIGHTER SHOWING UP TO YOUR

這就像一個消防員出現在你的。

HOUSE, WAITING UNTIL EVERYTHING HAS BURNED TO THE FOUNDATION,

房子，等待直到一切都燒到地基。

AND SAYING, "OKAY, LET'S TRY SOME WATER NOW!"

並說，"好吧，讓我們嘗試一些水吧！"

THE PRESIDENT'S DEBATE TEAM HAS ALSO INDICATED THAT TRUMP WILL

總統的辯論團隊也表示，特朗普將。

TELL MORE JOKES AND STRIKE A SOFTER TONE.

說更多的笑話，打出更柔和的語氣。

BUT THEY ALSO EXPECT TRUMP TO KEEP GOING AFTER BIDEN'S SON

但他們也希望特朗普繼續追隨比登的兒子。

HUNTER.

獵手：

SO, SOFTER, FUNNY, BUT STILL ATTACK.

所以，更柔和，有趣，但仍然攻擊。

( AS TRUMP, WHISPERING ) "WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE

"為什麼雞會過河？

ROAD?

路？

TO BUY CRACK FOR HUNTER BIDEN."

為獵人比登買破解。"

TOO HIP FOR THE ROOM?" THE CAMPAIGN ALSO WANTS TO GIVE

"太時尚的房間？"競選活動也想給...

BIDEN PLENTY OF SPACE TO MAKE A GAFFE, AS THE PRESIDENT

比登有足夠的空間來做一個GAFFE，因為主席

EXPLAINED THIS MORNING TO THE "FOX & FRIENDS."

解釋了今天早上的 "福克斯和FRIENDS。"

>> THERE WERE A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT SAY LET HIM TALK, BECAUSE

>> 有很多人說，讓他說話，因為。

HE LOSES HIS TRAIN-- LOSES HIS TRAIN-- HE LOSES HIS MIND,

他失去了他的火車 -- 失去了他的火車 -- 他失去了他的頭腦。

FRANKLY.

FRANKLY.

>> Stephen: FORGET ABOUT BIDEN.

>> Stephen:忘掉比登的事吧

TRUMP JUST LOST HIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT BETWEEN "TRAIN" AND "OF

特朗普在 "火車 "和 "的 "之間失去了他的思想列車。

THOUGHT."

思想。"

( AS TRUMP ) "I'M GOING TO LET BIDEN TALK

（作為特朗普）"我要讓比登說話。

UNTIL HE LOSES HIS TRAIN...

直到他失去了他的火車... ...

LOSES HIS TRAIN... I AM A TRAIN.

失去了他的火車... ...我是一列火車。

♪ RIDING THAT TRAIN HIGH ON COCAINE ♪

乘坐那列火車高的可卡因

SPEAKING OF WHICH, DON JUNIOR.

說到這裡，唐-朱尼爾，

DO YOU HAVE ANY MORE 'THE BEST IS YET TO COME' POWDER?

你有更多的 "最好的還在後頭 "的粉劑嗎？

THE INSIDE OF MY SKULL IS STILL STICKY.

我的內臟還在粘著。

TRUMP COMPLAINED THAT THE MEDIA IS SOFT ON JOE BIDEN.

特朗普抱怨說，媒體對喬-比登軟弱無力。

>> LOOK AT YESTERDAY.

>> 看看昨天。

HE WALKS OUT OF A STORE, AND THE MEDIA'S STANDING THERE, AND THEY

他走出一家商店，和媒體的站在那裡，和他們

ASKED HIM "WHAT FLAVOR ICE CREAM DID YOU GET?"

問他 "你買了什麼口味的冰淇淋？"

I MEAN, THINK OF THIS.

我是說，想想這個。

>> I KNOW.

>> 我知道。

>> THEY NEVER ASK ME A QUESTION LIKE THAT.

>> 他們從來沒有問過我這樣的問題。

I WANT THEM TO SOMEDAY, BUT THEY NEVER ASK ME A QUESTION LIKE

我希望他們有一天，但他們從來沒有問我一個問題，如

THAT.

那。

"WHAT FLAVOR ICE CREAM DID YOU GET?"

"你吃的是什麼口味的冰淇淋？"

>> Stephen: YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?

>> Stephen:你最喜歡的冰淇淋？

I'M GOING TO GUESS BEN & JERRY'S DEX-A-METHACONE DREAM.

我要猜測本和傑瑞的DEX -A -METHACONE夢想。

BUT THEN, THEN, LATER IN THE INTERVIEW, TRUMP

但是，然後，然後，在採訪中，特朗普後來，

GOT THE QUESTION HE ASKED FOR: >> DO YOU WANT TO TELL US WHAT

得到了他要的問題：>>你想告訴我們什麼？

YOUR FAVORITE MILKSHAKE FLAVOR IS?

你最喜歡的奶昔口味是？

>> YEAH, I WOULD, IN ABOUT A YEAR OR TWO WHEN EVERYTHING IS

>> 是的，我會的，大約一兩年後，當一切都準備好了。

SO PERFECT, I'M GOING TO LET YOU ANSWER THAT, OR ASK ME THAT

太完美了，我要讓你來回答，或者問我這個問題。

QUESTION.

問題：

>> Stephen: THAT'S THE SOFTBALL YOU ASKED FOR!

>> 史蒂芬：這就是你要的軟球!

JUST SAY YOUR FAVORITE MILKSHAKE!

說出你最喜歡的奶昔吧!

( AS TRUMP ) "I'M NOT A WHITE SUPREMACIST,

我不是一個白人至上主義者。

BUT I AM TELLING VANILLA TO STAND BACK AND STAND BY."

但我要告訴VANILLA站在後面，站在旁邊。"

TRUMP HELD A RALLY IN TUCSON YESTERDAY, AND BEFORE HE WENT

特朗普前天在圖森舉行集會，在他去之前

-- DO WE NEED TO REDO THAT OR CA I JUST KEEP GOING?

-- 我們需要重做，還是讓我繼續前進？

JUST KEEP GOING OKAY.

只是繼續走好。

BEFORE HE WENT ON, HE TOLD REPORTERS -- SO WE'RE NOT GOING

在他上場之前，他告訴記者 - 所以我們不走了

TO EDIT THAT?

要編輯嗎？

WE'RE NOT GOING TO LATER SEE YOU EDIT IT SO I SAID IS PERFECTLY.

我們不會再看到你編輯它，所以我說是完美的。

WE'RE GOING TO STICK WITH THIS.

我們要堅持這個。

TRANSPARENCY.

透明度：

THAT'S RIGHT.

這是正確的。

THAT'S "THE LATE SHOW"" PROMISE.

這就是 "晚間秀""的承諾。

YES I'LL ( BLEEP ) UP, BUT YOU'LL KNOW.

是的，我會（嗶嗶）了，但你會知道。

OKAY.

好的。

STARS, THEY DON'T DO THEIR JOB VERY WELL.

明星，他們不做他們的工作非常好。

HE TOLD REPORTERS THAT HE'S NOT DESPERATE BECAUSE HE'S BEHIND IN

他告訴記者，他並不絕望，因為他是在後面的

THE POLLS.

民意調查。

>> I'M NOT RUNNING SCARED.

>> 我不是在嚇跑。

I'M RUNNING ANGRY, BECA- I THINK I'M RUNNING ANGRY.

我很生氣，因為... ... 我想我在生氣。

I'M RUNNING HAPPY, AND I'M RUNNING VERY CONTENT.

我跑得很開心，我跑得很充實。

>> Stephen: (AS TRUMP) "I'M NOT SCARED.

>> Stephen:(如特朗普) "我不害怕。

I'M ANGRY!

我很生氣！

ANGRY AT HOW HAPPY AND CONTENT I AM!

憤怒於我是多麼的快樂和內容!

WHICH OF COURSE THEN MAKES ME HUNGRY, WHICH MAKES ME SLEEPY.

這當然會讓我餓， 這讓我困了。

I'M ALSO VERY DOC AND VERY DOPEY."

我也很DOC和很DOPEY。"

ONCE HE WAS ON STAGE, TRUMP ASSURED THE CROWD THAT THE

一上臺，特朗普就向觀眾保證，他的 "大選 "將於今年年底結束。

PANDEMIC IS TOTALLY UNDER CONTROL.

PANDEMIC是完全控制住了。

>> WE ARE ROUNDING THE TURN.

>> 我們正在轉彎。

WE HAVE THE VACCINES COMING AND ALL, BUT EVEN WITHOUT, WE'RE

我們有疫苗來了，所有的，但即使沒有，我們是。

ROUNDING THE TURN.

拐彎處。

>> Stephen: REALLY, ROUNDING?

>> Stephen:真正的，圓潤？

HAVE YOU SEEN THE COVID SPIKES?

你見過COVID SPIKES嗎？

HOSPITALIZATIONS ARE ON THE RISE IN 41 STATES.

41個州的醫院數量在上升。

WE'RE NOT ROUNDING THE TURN.

我們不是在轉彎。

I'M PRETTY SURE WE'RE SHARPENING THE TURN.

我很確定我們正在銳化轉彎。

WHAT WE'RE LOOKING AT HERE IS A RAZOR-SHARP TURN.

我們現在看到的是一個鋒利的轉彎。

BUT TRUMP SAID WE SHOULD STOP EVEN TRYING TO KEEP PEOPLE FROM

但特朗普說，我們應該停止甚至試圖阻止人們從

GETTING SICK NOW, BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE GETTING SICK OF TRYING TO DO

現在生病了，因為人們已經厭倦了嘗試去做。

THAT.

那。

>> PEOPLE ARE PANDEMICED OUT.

>>人們都被PANDEMICED了。

YOU KNOW THAT?

你知道嗎？

THEY'RE PANDEMICED OUT.

他們是潘德米奇了。

>> Stephen: THAT'S QUITE A RALLYING CRY WHEN WE'RE FACING

>> Stephen:當我們面對的時候，這真是一個振奮人心的吶喊。

AN EXISTENTIAL THREAT.

一個存在的威脅。

"WE'RE TIRED OF IT!" REMINDS ME OF CHURCHILL:

"我們已經厭倦了！"讓我想起了CHURCHILL。

>> WE SHALL FIGHT THEM ON THE BEACHES, WE SHALL FIGHT THEM ON

>> 我們要在海灘上與他們戰鬥，我們要在海灘上與他們戰鬥。

THE LANDING GROUNDS...

著陸場... ...

HOO, BOY, IS ANYONE ELSE A LITTLE NAZI'D OUT?

嚯，小子，有沒有人是一個小納粹出來？

WHAT IF WE JUST LET THE GERMANS WASH OVER US?

如果我們讓德國人洗劫我們呢？

>> Stephen: STILL, TRUMP KNOWS THAT THE ECONOMY HAS TAKEN A

>> 斯蒂芬：仍然，特朗普知道經濟已經採取了。

HIT, SO HE TACKED A FEW WORDS ONTO HIS FAMOUS CAMPAIGN SLOGAN.

命中，所以他在他著名的廣告語SLOGAN上加了一些話。

>> UNDER MY ADMINISTRATION, WE BUILT THE GREATEST ECONOMY IN

>> 在我的上司下，我們建立了最偉大的經濟體系，在我的上司下，我們建立了最偉大的經濟體系。

THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD, AND NOW WE'RE DOING IT AGAIN.

世界的歷史，現在我們又開始了。

YOU KNOW, IT'S MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN, RIGHT?

你知道，這是讓美國再次偉大，對不對？

I SAY MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN, AGAIN-- AGAIN, AGAIN.

我說要讓美國再一次偉大，再一次... 再一次，再一次。

>> Stephen: YOU KNOW EVERY "AGAIN" YOU ADD IS REALLY JUST

>> 斯蒂芬：你知道你所添加的每一個 "再 "字都只是一個 "再 "字。

ADMITTING YOU SCREWED SOMETHING UP SO BAD YOU HAD TO FIX IT.

承認你把事情搞砸了，所以你必須要修復它。

IT'S NOT THAT COMFORTING.

這不是舒適的。

IT'S WHY ARBY'S DISCONTINUED THEIR SLOGAN:

這也是為什麼亞比停止了他們的SLOGAN。

>> ARBY'S, WE HAVE THE MEETS, AGAIN.

>> ARBY'S，我們又要開會了。

>> Stephen: FOR A WHILE IT WASN'T MEAT, EVIDENTLY.

>> Stephen:有一段時間，它不是肉，很明顯。

BUT THESE RALLY CROWDS LOVE TRUMP.

但這些集會的人群喜歡特朗普。

AND HE HAD AN INTERESTING REACTION TO THAT LOVE.

而他對這份愛有了有趣的反應。

>> Crowd: WE LOVE YOU!

>> 民眾：我們愛你！

>> THANK YOU.

>> 謝謝你。

YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME CRY!

你要讓我哭了！

DON'T DO THAT.

不要這樣做。

I DON'T WANNA CRY.

我不想哭。

I DON'T WANNA CRY.

我不想哭。

( CHEERING ) MAKE ME CRY, YOU'LL DESTROY MY

讓我哭，你會毀了我的。

IMAGE, AND THEN YOU WON'T LOVE ME ANYMORE.

影像，然後你就不會愛我了。

THAT WOULD BE TERRIBLE.

這將是可怕的。

>> Stephen: OKAY, I'M NOT SAYING I BELIEVE EVERYTHING FREUD SAID

>> 斯蒂芬：好吧，我並沒有說我相信弗洛伊德說的一切。

ABOUT THE IMPACT OF AN UNLOVING FATHER, BUT WHEN SOMEONE SAYS

關於一個不愛的父親的影響，但當有人說：

"IF I CRY, THEN YOU WON'T LOVE ME ANYMORE," IT SEEMS PRETTY

"如果我哭了，那麼你就不會再愛我了"它看起來很美

STRAIGHTFORWARD.

堅定不移地前進。

( AS TRUMP, STIFLING CRY ) "SEE, PAPA?

看到了嗎，爸爸？

NO TEARS!

沒有眼淚！

I'M NOT SAD.

我不難過。

I'M TOTALLY HAPPY AND CONTENT.

我完全高興和內容。

AND ANGRY!" THEN TRUMP TOOK AIM AT HIS

和憤怒！"然後，特朗普對他的。

NEMESIS: THE EARTH.

NEMESIS：地球。

>> THE GREEN NEW DEAL IS THE CRAZIEST THING, RIGHT?

>> 綠色新政是最瘋狂的事情，對不對？

NO MORE AIRPLANES.

沒有更多的飛機。

NO MORE DOUBLE CARS.

沒有更多的雙車。

>> Stephen: NO MORE DOUBLE CARS!

>> Stephen:沒有更多的雙車！

EVERYBODY LOVES DOUBLE CARS!

每個人都喜歡雙車!

EVERYBODY KNOWS WHAT A DOUBLE CAR IS.

每個人都知道什麼是雙車。

YOU GET A POPPY-SEED BUN, CAR, CHEESE, MAYBE CHICKEN CUTLET,

你會得到一個POPPY-SED包子，汽車，奶酪，也許雞肉片。

CAR, BUN.

車，包。

OR IS IT ONE CAR BETWEEN TWO CHUCKEN PATTIES -- I DON'T KNOW.

或者是一輛車夾在兩個大餅中間 -- 我不知道。

TRUMP SAID HE FELT GREAT AFTER GETTING TREATED FOR THE COVID,

特朗普說，他感覺很好 後得到治療的COVID。

AND HE PLAYED WHAT'S FAST BECOMING ONE OF HIS LATEST HITS.

他演奏了什麼快成為他最新的歌曲之一。

>> I WOKE UP, AND I FELT GOOD.

>> 我醒來後，我感覺很好。

I SAID, "GET ME OUT OF HERE."

我說，"讓我離開這裡。"

BOOM, SUPERMAN.

轟，超人。

>> Crowd: SUPERMAN, SUPERMAN, SUPERMAN.

>> 超人，超人，超人。

>> Stephen: TRUMP ISN'T SUPERMAN.

>> Stephen:川普不是超人。

FOR PETE'S SAKE, SUPERMAN SPENDS HALF OF HIS TIME AT LEAST

看在彼得的份上，超人至少花了一半的時間。

PRETENDING TO CARE ABOUT JOURNALISM.

假裝關心新聞報道。

♪ ♪ ♪ >> "THE DAILY SLAM-IT!"

>>"每日一擊！"

>> Stephen: TRUMP POINTED OUT HOW MUCH SUN HE'S GETTING AT

>> 史蒂芬：特朗普指出他在這裡得到了多少太陽？

THESE RALLIES.

這些集會。

>> YOU'RE GONNA SEE ME TOMORROW, I'M GONNA LOOK LIKE A LOBSTER.

>> 明天你會看到我，我將會看起來像一個龍蝦。

YOU'RE GONNA SAY, "LOOK WHAT WE DID TO HIM."

你會說，"看看我們對他做了什麼。"

THEY SAID, "WOULD YOU LIKE TO WEAR A HAT?"

他們說，"你想戴帽子嗎？"

I SAID "THERE'S NO WAY I'M WEARING A HAT."

我說 "我不可能戴帽子"

I GOTTA SHOW THESE-- WE GOTTA SHOW STRENGTH, RIGHT?

我必須展示這些 -- 我們必須展示實力，對嗎？

>> Stephen: FIRST OF ALL, "GONNA" LOOK LIKE A LOBSTER?

>> Stephen:首先，"會 "看起來像一個龍蝦？

YOU ALREADY LOOK LIKE YOU'VE SLATHERED YOURSELF WITH DRAWN

你看起來就像你已經把自己塗抹得乾乾淨淨了一樣

BUTTER.

黃油：

AND HATS ARE A SIGN OF WEAKNESS?

帽子是弱者的標誌？

HATS ARE KIND OF YOUR THING!

帽子是你的菜!

YOUR CAMPAIGN HAS ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT HATS...

你的競選活動一直都是關於帽子的...

AND, HATS.

還有，帽子。

IT WAS ALWAYS ABOUT HATS.

一直都是關於帽子的。

TRUMP IS HOLDING SO MANY RALLIES BECAUSE HE'S RUNNING OUT OF CASH

特朗普舉行這麼多集會是因為他的現金快用光了

TO ADVERTISE.

廣告。

MEANWHILE, BIDEN'S CAMPAIGN IS FLUSHED WITH MONEY, AND HE'S

與此同時，比登的競選活動資金充裕，而他的

TARGETING SENIORS BY ADVERTISING HEAVILY ON SHOWS SUCH AS

在諸如節目中大肆宣傳，以老年人為目標。

"JEOPARDY!" AND "WHEEL OF FORTUNE."

"JEOPARDY！"和 "財富之輪"。

IN FACT, LAST WEEK, BIDEN EVEN SPONSORED ONE OF THE PUZZLES.

事實上，上個星期，BIDEN甚至贊助了其中一個泡泡糖。

TRUMP MAY BE TRAILING BIDEN IN FUNDRAISING, BUT HE TOLD THE

特朗普可能在籌款方面落後於比登，但他告訴了公眾。

CROWD HE COULD GET ALL THE MONEY HE NEEDS, IF HE REALLY WANTED

他可以得到所有的錢，他需要的，如果他真的想要的

TO.

託：

>> I WOULD BE THE GREATEST FUNDRAISER IN HISTORY.

>> 我將成為歷史上最偉大的籌款人。

DON'T FORGET, I'M NOT BAD AT THAT STUFF, ANYWAY, AND I'M

不要忘了，我並不擅長這些東西，無論如何，而且我

PRESIDENT.

主席：

( CHEERING ) SO I CALL SOME GUY, THE HEAD OF

所以我打電話給一些傢伙，負責人的。

EXXON.

EXXON：

I CALL THE HEAD OF EXXON, I DON'T KNOW, "HI, HOW ARE YOU

我打電話給埃克森公司的負責人，我不知道，"嗨，你好嗎？"。

DOING?

做什麼？

HOW IS ENERGY COMING?

能源是如何來的？

WHEN ARE YOU DOING THE EXPLORATION?

你什麼時候去探險？

OH, YOU NEED A COUPLE OF PERMITS, HUH?

哦，你需要一連串的許可證，是吧？

OKAY."

OKAY。"

BUT I CALLED THE HEAD OF EXXON.

但我打電話給埃克森公司的負責人。

I SAID "YOU KNOW, I WOULD LOVE FOR YOU TO SEND ME $25 MILLION

我說："你知道，我很想讓你給我寄2500萬美金

FOR THE CAMPAIGN."

競選。"

"ABSOLUTELY, SIR.

"當然，先生。

WHY DIDN'T YOU ASK?

你為什麼不問呢？

WOULD YOU LIKE SOME MORE?" I WOULD RAISE A BILLION DOLLAR

"你還想再來點嗎？"我願意籌集十億美金。

IN ONE DAY IF I WANTED TO.

如果我想的話，一天之內就能完成。

>> Stephen: IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT TRUMP WAS BRAGGING THAT IT WOULD

>> 史蒂芬：特朗普在吹牛，說會這樣做已經夠糟的了。

BE SO EASY FOR HIM TO EXTORT ILLEGAL CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTIONS

讓他如此輕易地出口非法競選捐款。